Chapter Fifty-Two Ella
Chapter Fifty-Two
Ella
I finally stood at the top of the Empire State Building, gazing out at the twinkling lights of New York City; it was everything I had dreamed of.
Crowds gathered around me, nudging their loved ones at my ridiculous dress and skyscraper heels, but I didn’t care, because finally I could breathe again.
I closed my eyes, inhaling the deepest, coolest breath, feeling it travel down my body.
This city made me find myself again, it made me come alive again, and, OK, our visit had been packed with drama, stalkers and crazy men trouble, but we did make a difference here.
We left our mark. I leaned my hands against the railing, looking down at the people who passed in the street below, wondering how many of them would one day find love because of the app we’d created.
It felt rewarding, like I could finally let go of New York; I could say goodbye to the city now I had found myself again.
‘I thought I might find you here!’ I heard a deep American voice and turned in surprise. Jimmy stood there in his tuxedo, looking as handsome as ever, carrying a cute bunch of pink peonies.
I gasped, noticing people gawk at us. ‘You’re here! How?’ I laughed, completely confused.
‘I knew you had a thing for tall buildings,’ he said softly, letting out a small laugh.
‘Well, at least I’m not the only one totally overdressed now.’ I smiled, glancing at my dress. As he got closer, he stood beside me.
‘We missed you tonight,’ Jimmy said, glancing out at the city.
My face twisted. ‘I’m sorry, I just couldn’t do it . . .’ I admitted, knowing it sounded like a poor excuse.
Jimmy remained calm, his eyes still on the view. ‘That’s OK,’ he replied coolly. ‘Because of the last one? Were you worried or . . .’
I felt my chest tighten. ‘I wasn’t worried that anything would happen. I suppose I was scared to see you, if I’m being completely honest.’ My vulnerability made me feel exposed, but I was done with lying to this man, lying to myself.
Jimmy turned to face me, a smile on his lips. ‘OK, you gotta explain that one to me.’
I walked a few steps around the circular balcony, struggling to steady my voice.
‘It’s hard to see you when I know I’m going home.
This is all about to end.’ I rested my head against the railing, caught between frustration and sadness.
‘I love my life in Scotland; that’s my home.
But then I met you and everything was great – until it wasn’t.
Now it’s starting to feel good again, but I’m going home!
Living here in New York isn’t real life and I have to get back to reality, Jimmy. ’
Jimmy smiled, understanding. ‘So, you were scared.’ He shrugged. ‘That’s understandable.’
‘I just think that maybe I need to be on my own for a bit. I was with Philip, then I wasn’t.
Then I met you, and it’s been honestly amazing.
’ I smiled, feeling tears build up, but I was trying hard to hold them in.
‘I don’t want to chase a man around a city I’m not even from.
’ I shrugged. ‘I want an amazing life, of course! But I want a life that I’ve made, not one that my boyfriend has. ’
Jimmy pushed a strand of hair back from my eyes. ‘I understand, Ella.’
I sighed, thankful, grateful for how easily he seemed to get me.
‘But us men, we’re not all the same,’ he said, a small grin edging from his lips.
I instantly remembered him saying that on my first day at the office.
‘I love you, and I respect you, and if you have to go back to Scotland, then I totally understand. But you do know there’s more than one way to make a long-distance relationship work?
’ He nudged my shoulder playfully to lighten the mood.
‘Is there? I asked ChatGPT and the figures are awful. It’s basically pointless.’ I managed a laugh through the snotters I was producing with those backed-up tears.
Jimmy giggled and said, ‘Damn, I should have had Ethan hack that server and tell you there’s a high success rate.’
I turned to him, the night sky twinkling around us.
Every emotion surged to the surface. ‘I will always love you, Jimmy Link, but I have to move on,’ I said, feeling a lump in my throat the size of a basketball.
I wanted to cry, to wail, to cling to his gorgeously muscled leg.
But I steadied myself – I couldn’t lose myself again, not now, not when I’d finally begun to like who I was becoming.
‘And I will always love you too, every moment, every day,’ he promised. We stared at one another for a few seconds. ‘Well, I think we have sorted that out. I’m gonna let you enjoy your quiet time up here, Ella,’ he said.
I watched him rub his eyes, then he handed me the pink peonies.
‘Don’t be a stranger, huh?’ he called, stepping back a few steps.
I smiled, noticing the flowers he’d chosen, and then my gaze wandered to him. ‘How did you know these were my favourites?’ I asked, calling out to him.
He held out his arms. ‘Gossip Girl,’ he said with a smirk. ‘The same reason I knew you were up here!’
I lifted my head, stepping forward. ‘Wait! You watched it?’
Jimmy looked at me curiously. ‘You told me you loved it, so I thought I’d better catch up. Who would have thought Dan Humphrey, huh? My money was on Dorota!’
I felt my knees go weak. What the fuck was I thinking?
My breath escaped my body and I ran up and wrapped my arms tightly around Jimmy and squeezed him.
I laughed. I felt free, like I finally had my answer.
He knew me, he took time to know everything about me, he had made an effort since the very first moment I met him.
I leaned in and kissed him as hard as I could.
Jimmy opened his mouth, and I felt his tongue wrap around mine.
He pulled me closer, his body pushing into mine. Fuck, I’d missed this.
‘Ella?’ Jimmy eventually said, his eyes glossy with tears. ‘What? What is it?’
I gulped down, still struggling to catch a breath, but for the first time it wasn’t fear – just relief and certainty. ‘You’re not the same as him.’
‘No, I’m not,’ he muttered under his breath, and I worried that I’d hurt him. ‘Of course, I’m not. But you still want to go home?’
I tilted my head, staring into his eyes. ‘Well, I heard New York is stunning at Christmas?’
Jimmy kissed me hard again, but his lips felt soft against mine. It was perfect. He was perfect.
‘I don’t care where the fuck I am,’ I said. ‘I want you, Jimmy. I want this.’
‘We can make it work out, Ella. Whatever we need, we can do it together, OK?’ Jimmy promised.
I nodded, grateful and blessed to have finally found my happily ever after.
*
Jimmy and I headed to Central Park and sat on a picnic table in the blistering cold.
I had messaged the girls to meet us and saw them wander into the park in their cocktail dresses and heels, giggling loudly.
We watched Ethan try to steady Zola. She’d probably had way too much to drink, I thought with a smile.
As they approached, they grinned widely, noticing we were cuddled up together.
‘So, you found her then?’ Zola asked, pointing her tequila bottle towards us as she took a swig.
‘I did.’ Jimmy laughed, standing up to shake Ethan’s hand. Ethan took hold of the tequila, laughing, then stepped away from the table. ‘It’s against the law to drink alcohol in the park,’ he said. The boys walked over to a nearby bin, dumping the booze and allowing my friends and me to chat.
‘Well . . . did you pump him in the park?’ Katy whispered, leaning close.
Zola burst into a drunken cackle.
‘No,’ I replied.
‘Not even a wee poke?’ she moaned, her face falling. She knew she was the only one who’d been poked and dropped in this city.
‘No! For fuck’s sake!’ I screeched, batting off her vodka breath.
Zola hugged me from behind, then slid onto the bench beside me. ‘What does all of this mean then?’ She raised a brow, drunkenly pointing towards Jimmy, while he chatted to Ethan on the grass a small distance away.
I bit my lip nervously, excitement and concern battling inside me. ‘I guess it means we can stay for Christmas, if you guys are up for it?’ I really wanted to be in New York with Jimmy, but I knew I’d struggle without my friends here too.
‘Ehh . . . duh!’ Zola let out a wild screech of excitement, as Katy grinned widely.
‘We’ll stay for however long you need us to, Ella,’ Katy replied. ‘But can you ask Jimmy if his bodyguard bouncer guy is single? He’s come with us to meet you, but I couldn’t get him to chat to me. Not a word!’
I turned my head to the bald, muscular figure standing a few metres away like a brick shit house.
‘He’s so hot! And he wouldn’t talk to me, but I’m sure he was checking me out earlier,’ she said, sending a cheeky wave over to Jimmy’s head of security.
‘Perhaps you need to wait till he’s off duty,’ I said. ‘But, really?’ I wasn’t quite getting this thug look she seemed to be liking.
‘Oh, come on, you know she has a thing for the Grant Mitchell-type, babe! I found out the hard way, remember?’ Zola burst out laughing, recalling the time she walked in on Katy strumming herself to his documentary.
We let the laughter simmer and huddled together closely in the moonlit park.
‘You know, this feels like the best day in the world,’ I admitted. ‘Look where we are, and at everything we’ve achieved.’ I glanced over to the sparkling skyline glittering around us.
I felt Zola’s drunken head nod in agreement.
Katy’s gaze travelled around the glistening buildings. ‘And we couldn’t have done it without each other.’
I reached out for her hand and clutched it tightly. Because I knew, no matter who came on or off my limo journey in this lifetime, I wouldn’t be able to carry on without my two very best friends.