Chapter 11
Nix
They’re testing me, I thought as I sat on the windowsill, letting the icy winter breeze into my room. I shivered as goosebumps rose on my skin. My hoodie couldn’t protect me from the wind, but I welcomed it, welcomed the fresh morning air, welcomed the way it tasted like snow and salt and freedom.
I could jump, I mused, looking down at the snow-covered ground. It was three stories to the ground, and after a night in a warm bed and the head start Levi had given me, my magic was coming back quicker than I’d expected, so jumping and softening the fall would be easy.
By the time they realize what’s going on, I’d be in the forest. I can shield myself from their eyes, hunker down in a tree, wait for the heat to die down and…
What?
Move back into my tent in the forest?
Leave the territory and pray Knox’s lackeys don’t notice? Hope that the tracking spell really expired?
My stomach turned, my body shuddering at the thought.
I’d be all alone again. I’d have no one.
There was a knock on my door, and my heart stuttered until I noticed Levi’s magic reaching through the door.
“Come in,” I shouted, flinching at how loud I was.
I was used to keeping quiet, trying not to draw attention.
The door opened, and my friend entered, his curls sticking up in every direction, face adorably rumpled. With him, the heavenly scent of coffee and sugar entered, making my mouth water and my stomach cramp in anticipation.
“Morning,” he mumbled, pushing the door closed with his hip. He had two cups, one in each hand, and gave me a small smile. “Coffee?”
“Yes, please.”
God knew I needed the caffeine.
“Did you sleep well?” Levi asked, then yawned. “Because I, for one, am tired as fuck.”
“I’m not sure I slept at all,” I admitted quietly and took the steaming cup Levi was holding out for me. His magic reached out, crawling up my arm, trying to find a way in, but there was none. I kept up a barrier on my skin, shielding myself from his magic.
“Is the bed that bad?” Levi joked, but I knew he was fishing for information, for explanations, for reasons.
And I owed him, I knew that. I owed him tons of explanations, but even thinking about letting him in made me nauseous.
So instead of saying anything, I took a sip of coffee. My eyes rolled back as the taste of vanilla hit my tongue, a perfect blend of bitter coffee, sweet vanilla, and soothing milk.
“Or is it the fact that you found your mate?”
I flinched and almost dropped the cup.
“What?” I asked voicelessly.
He knew?
Had the Alpha told him?
Why would he do that if he hadn’t even acknowledged it to me?
Levi gave me a smug look. “I know things too. I know you’re Gray’s mate. And I know you’re keeping secrets from me. Secrets that don’t have anything to do with the shifters or your past but with me. Personally.”
I had one last, longing look at the snow-covered ground, then closed the window with a sigh.
“What do you mean?” I asked, even though I knew exactly what he was talking about.
Last night in the cells, when his magic had jump-started me like a damn car. Of course he’d felt that. His mate might be convinced that I’d been the one doing… whatever, but Levi knew the truth.
“You know what I’m talking about,” he said, giving me a pointed look. “And I want answers.”
My skin was crawling, heart hammering in my chest, palms growing sweaty. I quickly put down my cup before it could slip through my fingers and shatter on the hardwood floor.
“Okay,” I said, then swallowed. “I do owe you an explanation.”
Or ten. Probably more.
But I didn’t want anyone listening in, soo…
“Give me a minute, please,” I said just as Levi opened his mouth.
I closed my eyes, focused on the well inside me and drew from it to build up a shield.
I pushed it outwards until it filled the room.
It’d stop sound waves from going out, efficiently creating a soundproof bubble around us.
A neat trick I’d taught myself a couple of months ago.
Levi stared at me with wide eyes.
“I felt that,” he said. “What did you do?”
“I soundproofed the room. I don’t want people to listen in. I know you think shifters are nice, and maybe your mate is, but what I’m about to tell you… it can change things.”
Levi gave me a pitying look. “I know you had bad experiences with shifters in your past, but this pack, these people, are good. No matter what you tell me, it won’t turn them into monsters.”
I hoped he was right. For him. He was tied to his mate until the end of their lives, unable to leave without ripping his fucking heart out.
“When I first spotted you here, I actually hoped it was a sign this pack was good, you know?” I mused, thinking back to him sitting in the café.
The relief I’d felt upon seeing a mage move around freely in a town that was filled to the brim with all kinds of shifters.
“I thought that if they had one mage in the pack and weren’t keeping him chained up that… ”
“Wait!” Levi interjected, eyes wide. “One… mage?”
I bit my lip and nodded. “Yeah. One mage. You.”
“But I’m not a mage.”
I laughed. “Yeah, I quickly realized that you had no idea about your abilities. It was a bit of a bummer. And believe me when I say that I am so, so sorry for not telling you sooner, but…”
“But you don’t trust shifters, and I’m mated to one.” He finished the sentence for me and gave a short nod.
“Yes.” Relief washed over me. Levi wasn’t shouting.
He didn’t even look angry, just so… sad.
“I was trying to protect you. Mages are… we’re the outcasts of the paranormal world.
The ones everyone picks on. Witches and wizards think we’re like…
hippies. They look down on us because our magic works differently from theirs.
They use spells, and honing their craft has more to do with learning, while we…
mages are more intuitive. We don’t use spells.
Our magic comes from within and is more connected to nature—which in their eyes is a bad thing because we’re as strong as we are.
We can’t learn new tricks to get stronger. At least that’s what they think.”
Levi nodded, his eyes still wide, fingers playing with the hem of his shirt.
“And what does that have to do with shifters?”
“Mages are useful to shifters because we’re the ones who can create barriers around their packs.
But they don’t like us. They look down on us too.
They view us as a means to an end. A tool.
Packs that get their hands on a mage… they want constant access to their magic, so they don’t let them go. They imprison them. Enslave them.”
Levi gasped.
“Nix. No, that’s not…”
“That is what’s happening. That’s the reason you rarely encounter mages. They’re hiding. We are hiding. Ones who are unlucky enough to be found out, well… they’re worth a lot of money.”
Levi shook his head and grasped my hand. “I don’t doubt what you’re saying. But that isn’t what this pack is about.”
He sounded so sure. So completely unbothered by the fact that I’d just told him his mate’s species liked to enslave his species.
A foreign feeling curled in my stomach, hot and tight and uncomfortable. I wanted that. That unwavering belief, complete and utter faith in someone.
“I want to believe you,” I said, swallowing against the lump in my throat. “But after being hunted by a pack of shifters for six months, after a lifetime of witnessing what fellow mages go through… I’m not sure I can.”
Levi set his mug down next to mine and wrapped me up in a hug, his magic protectively curling around me, exuding warmth.
“You will learn to,” he said decisively, then let out a laugh.
“You’ll have to, because you just dropped a bombshell on me.
I’m a mage? Seriously?” I turned my head as the first giggles bubbled out of Levi, followed by more cute snort-laughs until he was full-on laughing.
“Holy shit, you told me I’m a mage, and I just ignored it like, ‘Okay, got it, next point.’ I’m a mage?
Are you serious? How is it possible that I never knew?
I’m an adult. I think I should’ve realized by now. ”
I couldn’t help but laugh too.
He was word-vomiting again, which meant he was nervous.
And hell, I got that. I so got that this was overwhelming.
“One of your ancestors was probably a mage. As I said, mages have gone into hiding. It’s entirely possible your grandfather or grandmother was a mage and didn’t tell anyone.
It’s possible their parents were mages, and they didn’t know they were.
It’s also possible that you just… are. Occasionally, there are new mages popping up with no familial connection to other mages.
Like a spontaneous mutation somewhere in your DNA.
Without knowing your family, I can’t tell. ”
Levi shook his head. “I can’t believe it. I mean… oh god. I think there were signs that something was off with me. About the way I was feeling the mate bond. And yeah, Rhett thought my connection to the barrier was weird, but he thought it just liked me.”
I snorted. “Yeah, uhm, that’s not how it works.
The barrier isn’t a conscious being. It’s magic.
Powered by the land and the pack. But your connecting to it gave it more power.
You… I don’t want to sound negative, but you don’t know what to do with your magic, so it’s trying to connect to other sources of magic. ”
Levi nodded slowly. “Like yesterday? When we…” He mimed an explosion with his hands, enhanced by a whooshing sound. Then he giggled. “I’m sorry, I’m being ridiculous, but what you’re telling me is… a lot.”
I laughed. “It’s okay. And in a way, you’re right.
Usually, I’m shielding myself. It’s something I always do.
It costs minimal energy to keep a shield on my skin going, but I was completely drained, and you were so worried, so when you grabbed me, you basically shoved a ton of magic into me, and I couldn’t stop you. ”
“Oh.” Levi’s eyes turned impossibly wide, and worry marred his face. “Did I hurt you? I didn’t mean to.”
No, he didn’t.