Chapter Twenty-Five #2
“Will Ethan and Tomas be implicated in her murder?”
“They had nothing to do with her kidnapping or murder.”
“I can’t believe she was murdered.”
“Really? You can’t?”
“Yes, I really can’t! What kind of monster murders a thirteen-year-old girl?”
“The same one who kidnapped our eleven-year-old son because he was running around the city unsupervised. I mean, what could possibly go wrong there?”
He sat back, giving her a hard look. “So this is all my fault, right?”
“Well, it’s not my fault! I said he was too young for that kind of freedom, but you told me to lighten up and let him be independent. Look where that got us.”
“He was in the wrong place at the wrong time.”
“No, he was exactly where people like this go to find kids to prey on, which is what I said could happen if he was given this kind of freedom.”
“So you were right. Is that what you want to hear?”
“No, Mike, that’s not what I want to hear.
I couldn’t care less about being right! I care about how I’m going to get my son through this trauma without him blaming himself for an innocent girl being murdered.
I’m focused on making sure he’s treated as a victim of this crime and not a perpetrator. That’s all I care about.”
“Your son. Not our son.”
“I think you should move out.” The fact that she felt nothing at all as she said those words should’ve terrified her.
“Are you serious?”
“I’m dead serious.”
“Come on, Tracy. This isn’t the time—”
“It’s exactly the time. Don’t pretend like this is some kind of shock to you. We’ve been out of sync for a long time, and that nearly cost us our son. I don’t want you here.”
“You sure as fuck wanted me here when you were a single mother.”
“That was a long time ago, wasn’t it? Back when you would’ve killed to protect our kids. That guy would’ve never allowed an eleven-year-old to run around this city on his own. Now… I don’t even know who you are anymore.”
“That is so not fair.”
“It isn’t? Really? When I told you it was wrong to let him go out with his friends at eleven, you said I was overreacting, that I was hysterical, that I was hovering and turning him into a mama’s boy.
Remember all that disrespectful shit you said to me when I sounded the alarm about our child being too young for that kind of freedom?
Remember how you told me I’ve been a helicopter mother since Brooke was assaulted? Is that ringing any bells?”
“I shouldn’t have said that stuff. I’m sorry.”
“Fuck you and your Monday-morning-quarterback apology. I want you out of here. I can’t bear to look at you.”
“You can’t be serious. You’re going to throw away twenty years of marriage over a mistake?”
“A mistake? Is that how you see an egregious lack of judgment? I can’t take the chance that you’ll allow something like this again, against my wishes.
You made me completely powerless in this situation by agreeing with what he wanted.
How could I say no after you’d said yes?
What happened to our united front that we always said was so critical?
You opened the door, and Ethan walked right through it like I hadn’t said no.
I have two children to protect, and we’re not at all on the same page about how to do that, so I want you to go. ”
“And not see my kids anymore?”
“I never said that, but you’re not making any more big decisions for them. That much is for certain.”
“And how do you propose to eliminate me from decision-making for them?”
“By getting a lawyer, divorcing you and suing for full custody, with visitation for you.”
He stared at her, incredulous. “You can’t be serious.”
“I am as serious as I have ever been about anything. Our marriage is over. I no longer trust your judgment, and I no longer love you the way I once did.”
“Do you honestly think I don’t feel sick about what’s happened?”
“I’m sure you do. Too bad you didn’t listen to me when I told you what could happen. No, I was overwrought, hysterical, overprotective. And I was fucking right, so please, do us all a big favor and get the fuck out of here before I have you thrown out.”
“With what army?”
She gave him a look that she hoped reminded him of who her sister was and what she did for a living.
“Sam won’t force me out of my own home.”
“You don’t think so? If I ask her to, she’ll do it.
Don’t mistake her affection for you as greater than her loyalty toward me and the kids.
If I call her and tell her I want you out of here and you’re refusing to go, she’ll do something about it.
Let’s not go there. Our family has already had enough negative attention thanks to you. Do the right thing and go quietly.”
She stared him down as he waited for her to change her mind, to soften her directive, to take back what she’d said. None of that was going to happen. This wasn’t about being right. It was about keeping their kids safe.
“I can’t believe you’re so quick to throw away more than twenty years together and the family we’ve built because I made a mistake.”
“If that’s how you see it, then I’m definitely doing the right thing. I’ve said everything I have to say to you. My next move will be to call Sam and ask for her help.”
They were engaged in another stare-down when Ethan came into the kitchen.
His pale face and haunted eyes only added to her fury. Her child had been changed forever by this incident, and his father was calling it a “mistake.”
“What’s going on?” he asked, glancing between them.
“Nothing, honey,” Tracy said as she went to him. “Let’s get you back to bed. You need to be resting.”
“Why are you fighting?”
“You may as well tell him, Tracy. He’ll find out soon enough.”
She glared at him, wondering when he’d become such an asshole. “Dad and I are separating.”
“What? Why?”
“Because it’s what I need right now.”
“Are you getting divorced?”
“We’re taking a break.”
“Joey’s parents took a break, and then they got divorced.”
“I don’t want you to worry about that right now. We need you focused on getting some rest and recovering from your injuries.”
“Mom’s right, buddy. That’s all you need to be thinking about.”
Ethan’s eyes filled with tears. “I don’t want you to get divorced because of me.”
“Oh, baby, it wouldn’t be because of you,” Tracy said. “I swear.” She took him by the arm and escorted him back upstairs to his room. As she tucked him in, she said, “Please don’t worry about me and Dad. We just need a break from each other. That’s all it is.”
“Will you tell me if it’s more than that?”
“Yeah, sweetie. I will.” She ran her fingers through his thick hair and tried to bring some order to it, beyond thankful to have him back where he belonged, safe and mostly sound.
“What if people think I hurt her?”
“The police will say who did it when they announce the charges against the Mayfields.”
“Do you think Brecken will be charged, too?”
“He’ll be charged for the role he played in you and Tomas being kidnapped. I don’t know if he was involved in what happened to Luna.”
“I don’t think he wanted to hurt her. His dad told him what to do.”
“You’ll have to tell Sam everything you know at some point.”
“I don’t know much.”
“Still, you might have information that’ll make a difference in getting justice for Luna.”
“I want to help if I can.”
“And you’ll get the chance. For now, you need to rest.” She stood to leave him, even though she really didn’t want to.
“Mom?”
She turned back to him. “Yes, honey?”
“Will it always hurt this bad?”
His devastation only added to her fury, as unreasonable as it might seem to Mike. “No, honey. Eventually, the agony will fade, but you’ll always carry the ache for someone who was denied the chance to have a long and happy life.”
“Will I always feel responsible?”
“You’re not responsible. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“Why does it feel like I did?”
“Because something terrible happened, and we’re all sick over it. It’s perfectly normal to feel the way you do.”
“I’ve never felt this bad in my life. I only met Luna twice, but she seemed like a nice girl, and she was so pretty.”
“It’s really important that you understand none of this was your fault. Brecken and his father set up this entire thing. They used you and Tomas to get to her.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know, honey, but the story will come out.
It always does.” Tracy hated that her little boy would be forced to grow up far sooner than he should’ve had to.
That was another thing to blame on Mike and his shit judgment.
“The most important thing to remember is you were a victim of this crime, too, but because of your quick thinking, you and Tomas survived. And I’m so proud of you for keeping your wits about you and getting yourself and your friend out of there. ”
“I wish I could’ve saved Luna, too.”
“I know, buddy, but you did what you could, and by coming home, you saved me and Dad and Brooke and Abby, too.”
“Will you stay here with me for a while?”
“Of course.” Tracy snuggled up and put her arm around him. “I’ll stay for as long as you want me to.”