Chapter Thirty-Two
Tara wished she had brought warmer clothes and her cell phone. After Calista had agreed to watch Royce for her for a few hours, Tara had left the cottage, feeling safe enough to go for a walk because Drew had been detained and sent out of Backwater. Gage assured her Drew wouldn’t be going anywhere for a few days. He was secured behind bars. Where he belonged.
Her feet had seemed to know where to go more than her mind. She needed space, and the farther up the mountain she went, the more she craved it. She kept walking, as if something possessed her. Not until she saw the hunter’s cabin did she know this was the place she had wanted all along.
The place she and Kace had spent their first night together when he was too sick to hike back down. That was the night she knew he had woven himself into the fabric of her being and she would never be free of him. Here she could feel as if he was with her because she wanted him to be.
She had foolishly misjudged her timing and wouldn’t have enough light to walk back with. Probably should have brought a flashlight, but even with one, she didn’t trust herself to know the way in the dark.
She needed to start a fire in the cabin and plug in the generator for light. She had no way to call Calista, but the Ryker family could be counted on in time of need. Every family member had come to her rescue after she showed up on Gage’s door shaken and hurt. Calista would watch Royce until she returned.
She’d sleep here and go back in the morning. She hoped Royce wouldn’t be too upset with her for not coming back as promised. If her head had been on straighter, she would have brought the damn phone. She reminded herself that even if she had the phone, the reception wasn’t great up here. She’d make it up to him tomorrow.
She gathered wood from the back and arranged kindling in the fireplace. Her life was in shambles, but she wanted to soar into the vast Montana sky. Drew’s anger was real, but she had stood up to him. Finally.
She lit a match. The flame licked the smaller pieces of wood as if trying to seduce them into catching fire. She blew on the tiny blaze to give it a little help. She had helped Jane, and that felt good. She wished she could have helped Kace, but he would have to help himself. Hopefully, he didn’t kill himself before he figured out how.
She wanted to shake that stubborn man. He had a group of people who loved him with everything they had, and he couldn’t see past his dashboard. All he had to do was have a little bit of patience, and he’d be well enough to drive again. He thought his whole life was over because he couldn’t finish this season on top.
“Please, little fire, take hold.” She fanned the flame, but it was as stubborn as Kace.
She walked to the window but couldn’t see anything outside in the dark. She had thought her own life was over once Drew had returned. She was in no position to lecture Kace about his choices. The kindling went out. “Okay, I’ll be cold,” she said to the empty room.
No phone, no Wi-Fi, not even a book to read. It was going to be a long night. She gathered the blankets from the coffee table that doubled as storage and cocooned herself on the small sofa.
She still had to find a new job. She’d start that first thing tomorrow. She couldn’t stay on the ranch. Just being in this cabin made her think about Kace lying on that floor, acting like a gentleman, and giving her the couch.
For now, she’d close her eyes and listen to the sounds of the forest. Maybe the Universe would send her a message on which way to go.
A knock sounded on the door.
Her heart jumped, but the rest of her froze. Someone was out there, and she didn’t know what to do. Had Drew found her? No, that was impossible. It couldn’t be him, but who would know to come here? Could it be a guest from the ranch lost in the woods?
“Tara, it’s me.”
She threw off the blankets and ran to the door. The breath had returned to her lungs. Kace stood on the stoop in his yellow-and-black fire suit. His hair looked as if it had been raked through, dark circles hung under his eyes, but his bright smile buckled her knees.
He lifted her into his arms and swung her around. “Thank God. I couldn’t find you. I was so worried about you.”
She clung to him for a brief second. He smelled of sweat and leather and all male. She wanted to drink in his scent, but she eased out of his embrace to look at his face. “You went looking for me?”
He held her hands. “I looked everywhere. Can I come in?”
“It’s your cabin.” She moved aside to let him past.
He hesitated but brushed past her. “I have a lot to tell you, but I need to get out of this suit first. Where’s Royce, by the way? I thought he’d be here with you.”
“Calista is babysitting. Did you bring a change of clothes?” This whole moment seemed surreal. She tried not to laugh at its absurdity.
“I didn’t hike up with a bag. The go bag is in my truck. Wish I had thought to grab it. Concussion brain, I guess.” He pulled a small metal storage footlocker out of the utility closet. “Lock leaves a change of clothes in here. I’ll borrow them for now.”
He unzipped the suit and peeled it away. Underneath he wore what looked like long underwear molded to his muscled body. Heat ran over hers. She turned away to let him finish with some privacy.
“Why are you here, Kace?” She kept her gaze on the closed door.
He moved around behind her. He dragged the locker across the wood floor, and the click of the closet door echoed in the small space.
“You can turn around. I’m dressed.” He wore a white T-shirt that contrasted with his dark skin and navy-blue sweatpants that led to his bare feet. The clothes fit him as well as the fire suit had. “I had to see you.”
“Why? Shouldn’t you be at the race? I don’t understand what’s going on.”
“Let’s sit. I’m wiped out. It’s been a very long day.” He plopped down on the sofa and stretched his long legs out.
She stood by the door.
“You don’t want to sit next to me?”
“I think it’s better if I stay standing.” If she sat close enough to touch him, she would want to touch him everywhere. She had to stay strong. He wasn’t hers even though his presence here rang her bell of hope a little too loudly.
He grabbed his phone and tapped the screen. “I need to tell Jett I found you. He might have the whole ranch looking for you by now.”
“You started a search party? Oh boy. After Gage brought me to the hospital, Calista came with Royce. Afterward, we drove back to the ranch, but she suggested I stay in the main building where Jett and Lock were. Gage had to go back to the station. When I needed to go for a walk, she offered to watch Royce.”
“I saw the breaking news on the television in the locker room. When I found out you had been admitted to the hospital, I had to get to you and make sure you were safe.”
“I’m fine.” Her head still hurt a little, but she would be okay in a day.
“You have a bruise on your face.” He went to stand, but she put a hand up.
“It’s nothing. I mean that. He hit me, but I fought back this time. He won’t ever hurt me again.” The words rushed out of her on a wave of pride. Kace had been the first person she wanted to call when the whole awful event went down. Gage had even offered to call him for her, but she had said no.
He stood anyway and hobbled over to her. He was hurting again, and she wanted to wring his neck for not saying so. With only inches between them, he cupped her face and stared into her eyes.
“I’m so proud of you, babe. You were brave. As long as I’m around, that man will never get close enough to hurt you or Royce. You have my word even if you don’t need it.” He placed a soft, sweet kiss on her lips.
She fought the urge to weep. She had held it together before now, but his kindness and tenderness would undo her. “I’m proud of me too.”
He wiped a tear away with his thumb. “Can we sit? I’m starting to not feel so great.” He moved back to the sofa and sat with a groan.
“Do I need to call for help?”
He pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head. “I’m just exhausted, and being tired makes the symptoms worse. Now that I know you’re all right, my body is relaxing, and the adrenaline is gone.” He let out a short, disgusted laugh. “I’m a mess right now.”
“You and me both.” She went against her better judgment and sat down next to him.
“Not you. You were amazing today against Drew. Jett told me some of what happened. But the fact you went to court and stood up for yourself, that’s great. You can get on with your life now.”
“That’s the plan. I’m resigning tomorrow. I haven’t told Jett yet.”
“Then that’s it. It’s too late for us? Even though you told me you loved me.”
She had said that and didn’t regret it, but those words didn’t change anything. “Kace, you are going to drive yourself right into your death. I don’t want to sit around and watch it, and I don’t want to be the person who gets in the way of your dreams. I know how much racing means to you. I just want you to know how much you mean to everyone else.”
“I’ve been pretty selfish lately.”
She didn’t say anything. It hurt to agree with him.
“I like it when you call me on my bullshit. Always say what’s on your mind.” He winked. “I came off the track today in the middle of the race. I have never felt so sick in my life, and no matter how hard I tried to ignore the symptoms, they continued to get worse. Then a crash happened while I was in the middle of the pack. I knew in that instant my concussion was worse.”
“You pulled over while you were racing?”
“Crazy, right? I never would’ve believed I’d do something like that. I heard your voice in my head telling me to take care of myself. I just wanted to come home and rest then and there. I have people I want to come home to.”
She put a hand on his knee. “What you did was smart and brave. Asking for help doesn’t make you less of a man.”
He glanced at her from the corner of his eye. “I’m kind of hoping that’s true, because I need help, and I don’t want you to think any less of me.”
“You’re going to see a doctor?”
“I’ll start calling first thing Monday.”
“Kace, you are everything a man is and more. You’re strong and centered. You’re kind. You work hard and love your family fiercely. Being sick doesn’t change who you are where it counts.”
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“You still want me all broken and battered?” But maybe she was a little less broken after what had happened in court and with Drew.
“Your past doesn’t define you. To me, you are beautiful, strong, amazing, smart, determined, brave. I don’t see the other stuff you think I see, but I think you needed to see yourself as some of that first.”
“I do now.” She had the courage to believe him now, to believe she deserved some happiness.
“I won’t leave your side while you recover from the concussion. And if you want to go back to racing, I’ll be by your side for that too.” Her heart swelled until it stole her breath. “I love you, Kace Ryker. I love all of you.”
“I love you too.” He placed a soft kiss on her lips. “I’m scared about my recovery or if I even will. I won’t know what to do if I can’t drive anymore. I don’t even have my garage to fall back on. I haven’t been this lost in a long time, but with you, I think I can handle what’s to come.” He wiped tears from his eyes. “Do me a favor? Don’t tell my brothers I cried.” His smile cracked open and spread wide.
She climbed onto his lap and straddled him. He gripped her waist. His hands holding her sent delicious shivers over her skin.
“Whatever you want them to know about this, us, your recovery is up to you. Thank you for trusting me with your feelings.”
He brought her closer and kissed her long and hard until her head spun and they were out of breath. “It’s too late to hike back down. We’re going to be spending the night here.” He ran a finger down the side of her neck and between her breasts.
“I couldn’t get a fire started. How will we ever stay warm?” She wiggled against the erection his borrowed sweatpants couldn’t hide.
“How about you and me tangled up under those blankets?” He nodded in the direction of the pile she had left behind.
“Just for tonight?” For the first time she believed she could have it all.
“For every night, Tara. And every morning. So that means you aren’t quitting your job either. You and Royce can move into my cabin with me. I need you.”
She needed him too. But not like before. Never that way with a man again. This was what real love looked like. Sharing. Trusting. Believing. “It looks like I’ll be staying a while, then.”
“A very long while.”