Chapter Ten #2
Me: Yes, that’s what he said. I went in to meet her. She’s lovely, bright and cheerful
Beth: Oh, I’m so glad for you! I know you’ve missed having a dog since losing Hamlet
Me: I have
Beth: What are you going to call her?
Me: Queenie :-)
Beth: I love it! How did you come up with that?
I decide not to tell her the truth.
Me: She seemed like royalty! She needs to be groomed and checked over, and I’ll probably be able to pick her up on Wednesday
Beth: So exciting
Me: Yeah, it really is
I hesitate, not sure whether to bring it up now, on text; I could wait, but I feel bad after what she said last night. I could call her… but I don’t think she wants to talk on the phone. I decide to bite the bullet and go for it.
Me: Also I wanted to apologize for not asking you if you’d like to come and work at PAWS
Beth: Oh that’s okay, I’m sorry for bringing it up, I was just being needy
Me: No you were perfectly right. I should have asked. It was just that I knew being so near to you all day every day would be torture. But it wasn’t a good enough reason not to ask you, because you’d be perfect at the center. So please, I’d like you to consider it
Beth: I wouldn’t be stepping on Isla’s toes?
Me: No, not at all. I know she’s a vet nurse too but she’s going to be Practice Manager, so she’ll be less focused on day-to-day care, and more on the running of the place
Beth: Of course. But… I guess we should have a conversation about us working together after what’s happened. Do you think it would be awkward?
Me: I don’t think so. I don’t know what’s going to happen between us, but whatever our future, I think you’d make a great addition to PAWS. We’re both adults. I like to think we can make it work
She’s quiet for a moment. Then she comes back with, That’s such a great attitude. I like that.
Me: So… I’d like to offer you the role of Senior Veterinary Nurse
Beth: Oh!!!!!! Really?
Me: Absolutely. I’ve already talked to Cullen about it. We’re looking for someone to oversee animal welfare standards, and maybe design handling protocols for therapy animals. Possibly to train junior nurses and students
Beth: I’m incredibly flattered. You really think I’m up to it
Me: lol
Beth: I mean it!
Me: I know. That’s why you’re so adorable
Beth: Aw
Me: Of course you’re up to it. You’d be great. But only if you want to join us. The Ark is a great place to work, and I understand if you’d prefer to stay there
Beth: Can I think about it?
She has so much on her plate; I’m not surprised she’s overwhelmed.
Me: Of course!
Beth: All right, thank you! I have to go now, Kim’s made lunch. Speak later?
Me: Sure, take care of yourself
I hesitate, then send a heart emoji. She responds with one, and I blow out a breath and slide my phone back in my pocket.
Am I crazy for offering her the job at PAWS before we’ve worked out where we stand personally? I frown, wondering if I should have waited. I just felt bad that she was hurt because we hadn’t asked her.
It was always going to be tough working with her every day.
It’ll be even harder to do that after having slept together, especially if, in the end, she says she’s not interested in dating me.
Or, even worse, if she goes back to Jude.
I hadn’t thought of that. I wince, wishing I’d waited, but it’s too late now.
Oh well. It’s possible she’ll tie the two things together.
Either she’ll stay with Jude and remain at the Ark, or take a chance on both me and working at PAWS.
I sigh, get to my feet, and go back inside, locking the door behind me. There’s a lot to do, and it won’t get done while I’m sitting on my backside.
*
I spend another couple of hours clearing up the debris outside, then eventually head home. I’ve only eaten a cereal bar today and I’m ravenous, so I make myself some typical single-guy fodder—a huge chicken, cheese, and chip sandwich and take it into the living room to eat.
I’ve just started when my phone rings. I look at the screen, wondering if it’s Beth or Jude, but the name says Natalie.
Natalie Price is a therapist working at Sunrise Bay Community Wellbeing Center with me. When I decided to set up PAWS, I knew I had to be careful about poaching other therapists, and I’m planning to advertise and interview rather than approach people directly.
But Natalie is different. We’ve been good friends since she started working there a couple of years ago. She’s young and chirpy but extremely hardworking, and we have the same approach to therapy, which is rarer than you might think.
She’s also gotten herself into a predicament at SBCWC.
She’s been having an affair with the guy who runs the center.
He’s divorced, but he has two kids, and she told me that recently he seems to be spending a lot of time at the family home.
Of course, he wants to see his kids, but last week she confessed that she suspects he still has feelings for his ex-wife.
I told her then that if she’d like to come and work at PAWS, we’d love to have her.
She said she’d think about it. Has she come to a conclusion?
I answer the phone. “Hello?”
“Hey, it’s Natalie,” she says in her low, husky voice. She’s fun, and attractive. I like her a lot, and I might have considered asking her out… if I wasn’t bonkers about Beth.
“Hey you. How’s it going?”
“Shit,” she says. “The answer’s yes.”
My eyebrows rise, and I say softly, “Oh… what’s happened?”
She takes a big breath, then lets it out slowly.
“Come to think of it, that was a terrible way to tell you. I’m so sorry.
I’m not saying I want to work for PAWS as an escape route, not at all.
I’ve been giving it a lot of thought and was already ninety percent sold on the idea—I just didn’t want to let Rick down. But we had a big argument last night.”
“Hmm, there seems to have been something in the air.”
“Sorry?”
“Nothing. Did you argue about going to PAWS?”
“No, no, I hadn’t told him about your offer.
It was about him and Bryn. Obviously it was Valentine’s Day, and I was hoping we’d go out for dinner or something, but he said he was busy and ended up going around the house.
He swears there’s nothing going on, but I realized I can’t trust him.
I’m not going to hang around and waste my life on someone who’s not committed to me.
” She speaks with confidence, but I know her well enough to understand how much she’s suffering.
“I’m so sorry.”
She sighs. “It’s okay. But it sealed the deal for me. I wasn’t happy there, and I’m definitely not staying now. So if the offer still stands, I’d love to come and work for you.”
“For PAWS, not for me. There’s a standard contribution toward animal care and coordination, but you’d be an independent contractor.
We’d provide the space, shared scheduling and marketing, and the therapy program infrastructure.
But everyone should be here because they believe in the work first and foremost—not because they work for me. ”
“Sounds great,” she says, and I can hear the smile in her voice. “And Archer… thank you for asking me, I really appreciate it, and I’m excited about the work.”
“We’ll be lucky to have you. Look, I’ll be down at the site tomorrow. We’ve got the builders coming in to plan it out. If you want to come up and take a look around, feel free.”
“That would be great, I’d love to. Maybe around one p.m., during my lunch break?”
“All right. See you tomorrow, then?”
“Yeah, see you. Bye.”
She ends the call.
I toss the phone onto the sofa and eat my sandwich. We work well together, but we’re not confidantes, and she wouldn’t tell me everything about her relationship. I can tell she’s hurting, though.
My gaze drifts out of the window, across to the Pacific.
I know we’re not alone in having difficult relationships.
I deal with issues like ours every day in my work.
Communication and respect are surprisingly difficult things to hang on to, and I repeatedly talk to clients who aren’t able to make themselves heard in their relationships.
I think of Beth, and wonder how she’s doing, and how long it’ll take her to figure things out. Will Jude push her to talk? Will he want to try again, and if he does, will she agree? I have no way of knowing.
I hate feeling so impotent, but there’s nothing I can do about it. I can’t force her to date me. And even though I’m sure I could stir things up by encouraging Jude that their breakup was a good idea, there’s no way I’d ever do something like that because I’d feel like a heel for the rest of time.
No, if Beth wants me, she needs to make an informed choice. And I just have to wait and try to concentrate on other things until she does.
Even though my body burns for her, and I’m sure it’ll continue to do so, for some time.