Chapter 11
CHAPTER 11
E MILY
I can’t believe I managed to plan this day in record time—just four and a half months. As I sit in a chair off to the side of the room, I slowly peruse the scene as it unfolds before me. Shayna sits as still as she can while the makeup artist completes her look, and the hairdresser who’s just finished styling Trina’s hair is showing her the back of it with a mirror. Shayna’s five-year-old son, Tommy, is sitting in a corner of the room coloring. And the photographer is flitting around as she snaps candid photographs of the day.
In forty-three minutes, I’ll walk down the aisle to get married. I’ve known Teddy for eleven of my twenty-six years and dated him for most of those years. Jesus, that’s almost half of my life. So, I know this queasy feeling in the pit of my stomach isn’t me getting cold feet about marrying him. Yeah, we’ve been through a lot with his mental health struggles, but we’ve also had many amazing times.
I glance down at my phone and expect to see a text from my parents saying they got stuck in traffic and will be here any minute. There isn’t one. My hands shake and my intuition tells me this is bad.
“Hey. What’s wrong, honey? Why are you shaking?” Shayna asks me. “You nervous?”
Her words break my staring contest with my phone, as I will it to ring. I peer up at her. “Shay, my parents aren’t here yet. Something bad is happening. I can feel it.”
My voice is practically a whisper, and I can see in Shayna’s eyes she’s worried, too. To her credit, she tries to hide it.
“I’m sure they’re just running late. Why don’t we call them?”
“C-can you clear the room out first? I want to call them in private. I just want you and Trina with me. In case I get upset.”
“Sure, babe. Gimme a minute. Okay?”
I nod in response.
Our wedding party is small, just Shayna and Trina in mine and Teddy’s best friend, Jack, and another friend of his from work standing up on his side. I watch as Shayna clears the room of the hairdressers, our make-up artist, and the photographer. The photographer balks for a second until Shayna gives her a look that would frighten just about anyone, and she leaves, huffing as she goes. It leaves just Shayna and Trina with me, and my ring bearer, Tommy.
Trina stands from the chair she was in as her hair was being finished and walks over. I can read the concern in her expression as she eyes me.
“What wrong, Em?” she asks.
My big sister—my only sibling—is pretty much my hero.
Our parents didn’t abuse us growing up, they just always made us feel like we were in the way or like we were an afterthought. We always had what we needed. If money could buy it, that is.
However, when it came to love and an emotional connection, they just didn’t have it in them to bond with us that way. But Trina, she never let me go one day without making sure I knew how much she loved me. I grew up with the coolest, toughest, most loving sister a girl could ask for.
“Mom and Dad aren’t here yet, Tri. I don’t think they’re coming…” The trembling in my voice fills the air and I notice Shayna pass Trina a worried look.
“They promised you. Even they wouldn’t break that promise,” Shayna adds. She’s trying to sound convincing, but none of us buys it.
“I’m calling them,” I say.
My sister and my best friend are two of the most badass, strong women I know, so I decide to borrow some of their energy and face my fears.
I call my mother’s number. It rings four times before she picks up.
“Hello?” Mom’s voice sounds as calm as normal. Maybe I’m wrong and they’re just late.
“Mom? It’s Emily. Are you and Dad almost here?” I try my best to hide the anxiety in my voice, but I know I’m not fooling anyone.
My mom releases an irritated sigh. “Emily, we aren’t coming.”
“Wh-what? I don’t understand. You said you’d come. Dad said he’d walk me down the aisle…”
“Well, I’m sorry you’re disappointed. But we thought about it, and we just can’t support you marrying Theodore. We tolerated him when we thought he was just a phase for you, but we can’t condone this union. You’d think after the things he’s done that you’d realize he’s a bad egg?—”
“Teddy’s not a ‘bad egg,’ Mother. He has bipolar disorder and when it was untreated, it contributed to him making some big mistakes. But his good traits far outweigh that. Besides, since he’s been getting treatment for his illness things have been great. If I can look beyond the past and see what a good man he is, why can’t you and Dad?”
“Don’t be dramatic. It’s unbecoming. If you insist on going through with this, you’re on your own,” my mom threatens.
“Don’t worry, Mom. I don’t expect—or frankly want—a thing from you and Dad. I’m done. My entire life I’ve wanted nothing from you and Dad except your love and approval but, apparently, that was too much to ask for. Goodbye.”
I sound surer than I feel and the look of concern on Shayna’s face as my vision blurs with tears shows me she sees through my act.
Trina takes the phone from me and walks toward the door to the room.
Shayna pulls me into a hug, squeezing me tight.
I’m convinced it’s the only thing that holds me together right now. I’m barely able to restrain my tears from falling, still in shock that my parents would do this, and not even call to tell me.
When Shayna releases me and looks me in the eye, she says quietly, “I’m sure my dad would be honored to walk you down the aisle. Should I ask him?”
That’s all it takes and the tears flow freely down my face. “N-no.”
A sob breaks free from my throat and Shayna looks over at Tommy.
“Can you take him out, please, Shay? I don’t want him to see me upset.” The truth is, I also need a minute to myself.
“You sure?” The hesitation to leave me is clear in her voice. I nod. “I’ll just take him to Shyley to watch and then I’ll be right back. Okay?”
Shayna doesn’t wait for my response before rushing over to Tommy and leading him out of the room.
I’m alone for the first time all day, though Trina’s raised voice seeps under the crack at the bottom of the door and it’s clear from her voice she’s still on the phone with my mom.
I make my way over to the settee and sit, resting my head against the wall and I no longer try to fight the tears that come.
* * *
CHARLIE
I pull open the heavy, ornate wooden doors of the church with fifteen minutes to spare and I make my way toward the chapel to find my seat. However, I’m distracted when I hear a voice spewing angry words, coming from a corridor off to the side. I’d know that voice anywhere, since it belongs to Trina.
I’ve known Trina since I was twenty-one, but I’ve only heard her this angry a few times. It’s a really bad sign that something has her this furious on Emily’s wedding day. Without a second thought, I follow the trail of her voice down the hall to the side of the vestibule.
“I can’t believe you and Dad would fucking do this to her. Today’s not about you or even him. It’s about your daughter!” Trina hisses.
Shit. If she’s on the phone with her parents, then it’s even worse. My dad’s an asshole, but Mr. and Mrs. Flynn give him a run for his money in the “shitty parent of the year” category. Trina notices me and points toward a door behind her. I assume she wants me to go in and wait for her.
“No Mom, I will not mind my language , because you’re hurting my sister and, for some reason, she keeps giving you and Dad chances. I swear to you if…”
The sound of her voice trails off as I enter the door she’s standing near and slip into the room, closing the door behind me. I’m not sure what’s possessing me, but Trina’s phone conversation tells me Emily is in trouble and I can’t stop myself from wanting to make it better, even if it’s not my place to do that for her.
I hear her soft crying before my eyes find Emily, sitting on a small couch in the room, alone. Rage consumes me that someone dared to make her cry—and especially on her wedding day.
The woman has been a bundle of energy and joy since I met her. Don’t get me wrong, both Flynn sisters are stubborn and, though it takes a lot to make them mad, once they’re angry, look out. But, in general, Emily usually lives up to my nickname for her—sunshine.
When I approach with caution in my steps, she doesn’t look up, probably assuming I’m Trina or Shayna. I kneel next to her, and unable to stop myself, I put my hand on her back. When she glances up, shock registers on her face, her eyes widen and she wipes frantically at them, as if she could stop the flood of tears by sheer will.
“Charlie…” she gasps.
Though I try to mask it, I fail, and the near growl in my voice reveals my anger at whoever made her cry. “Tell me who hurt you, sunshine.”
“N-nobody,” she attempts to lie to me.
“From the way Trina is ripping into who I assume are your parents on the phone, I’m guessing it’s them.”
She chokes back a sob. Without thinking, I stand and lift her, sliding onto the couch and pulling her to me. I hold her against my chest. I know I shouldn’t—she’s not mine—but I’m unable to fight the urge to shelter her right now as if she were. I lie to even myself as I tell myself it’s only because she’s my friend.
“Tell me what they did,” I urge her. I stroke her hair as she cries.
“They’re… they’re not coming. They were supposed to, and my dad was gonna walk me down the aisle. But they don’t approve and they’re not coming. And they didn’t even tell me. I had to call them to find out.”
I take a few deep breaths. Emily and Trina grew up with some of the most emotionally absent parents kids could have. But, this is a new low, even for them.
I used to think that my father’s special brand of “tough love,” as he liked to call it, was the worst parenting offered. But Emily and Trina’s parents made me realize that, while some parents abuse with words and fists, like my dad, others abuse through neglect and manipulation. It’s all abuse, just dressed up differently.
“I’m sorry, Em.” It’s all I can say. I’m a man of few words, but right now it’s the only appropriate thing to say.
I hold her for a few more minutes when an idea strikes me.
As I lift her away from my chest, I tilt her chin up until her eyes meet mine. Her gorgeous blue orbs pierce my soul when I see the pain in them. She’s so fucking beautiful, even when she’s been crying. I push the thought from my mind, as I remind myself again that she isn’t mine, and she’s about to marry her high school sweetheart.
I clear my throat. Suddenly, my lower abdomen quivers with nerves.
“I know it’s not the same, but if you’ll have me, it would be my honor to walk you down the aisle.”
Emily’s eyes widen and her mouth drops open. She stares at me. “You’d do that for me?” she whispers. “You hate being the center of attention, Charlie. And I know you probably don’t approve of me marrying Teddy. I’ve barely seen you since I got engaged?—”
“Hey.” I stop her. “I don’t dislike Teddy, Em. I’m just pretty sure no one will ever deserve you, in my eyes. As far as whether I’ll walk you down the aisle, of course I will. And no one will pay attention to me, anyway. They’ll all be staring at you and how beautiful you look.” I smile at her, hoping to lessen some of her sadness.
What I don’t tell her is that I’d do just about anything for her. Including push aside the niggling pain in my heart that I get whenever I think about her marrying Teddy. It’s been there ever since she got engaged. I’d never admit it to another soul, not even Trina. I have nothing against Teddy, personally. It’s clear she loves him. And I’m telling myself that the unease is simply protectiveness for my best friend’s little sister, not regret that I didn’t fight for a chance with her after that Thanksgiving a few years ago. Because I couldn’t possibly let it be more…
She smiles so sweetly at me I nearly melt.
“If you truly mean it, I’d love for you to walk me down the aisle.”
And that’s how, a few minutes later, I find myself standing at the back of a church, about to walk Emily down the aisle to give her away to another man.