Chapter 30
CHAPTER 30
C HARLIE
As I attempt to extricate myself from the tangle of arms and legs that Emily has me wrapped in, a low growl emanates from her sweet mouth.
“No. Don’t leave,” Emily whispers into my chest, her eyes still closed.
I chuckle. This woman is not a morning person.
Her lying on my chest like this, it’s more than I ever dreamed could happen. I place a soft kiss on her forehead, lingering there for a moment.
“I’m gonna go make us some coffee, sleepyhead. But you sleep in as long as you want.”
“Mhmm,” is her only response.
As I slip the rest of the way out of the bed, she snuggles deeper under the covers. She looks so beautiful and peaceful in my bed, nestled on her side. I take the edges of the comforter and tuck in up by the back of her neck, making sure she’s wrapped good. Her half-aware sigh tells me she notices.
In the two weeks since Emily and I started sharing a bed we’ve not slept apart once, and I’ve learned that she likes the room cool—almost cold—when she’s sleeping but wants to be burrowed in a nest of blankets. Oh, and she hates when she has any part of her from her neck down that is exposed to the air.
After I throw on some shorts and a T-shirt, brush my teeth, and grab a pair of socks, I head downstairs. In the kitchen, I go straight to the coffee bar area and scoop some beans into the grinder. As the beans grind, I inhale deeply and enjoy the rich, aromatic scent while I look out the window over the sink at the steadily falling rain.
The trails of water on the glass of the window are mesmerizing as they race down the pane. I’m actually glad for the rain, hoping it will take some of the thick August humidity out of the air. I’m also not going to complain that it gives Emily and me a reason to stay indoors today.
It occurs to me to check if we have enough half-and-half for Emily’s coffee this morning. As much of the night as we spent making love, it’s going to be a multiple cup day for both of us. I walk over to the fridge, pick up the carton and shake it a little. Definitely not enough for even one cup like she enjoys it, and certainly not for two. I take the next few minutes to start the coffee brewing, scribble out a note for Emily, then grab my keys and head out to the truck.
It’s about a fifteen-minute drive into the main part of Elladine from my home on the outskirts. I spend that entire time thinking about what’s happening between Emily and me. It feels serious. It has from the moment she dropped her robe in my bathroom. Was it sensual? Fuck, yes. But that’s not what made it feel serious. It was the look of vulnerability, yet trust, in her eyes as she did it. I know that couldn’t have been easy for her—putting herself out there like that after the betrayal she suffered in her marriage, and, hell, even after I freaked out about our kiss a few months ago.
I’ve known for a long time now that there’s no one for me besides Emily. Sure, I’ve dated some, telling myself that maybe there could be a shot with someone else, but deep down I think I’ve always known that being with anyone else was like trying to put a Band-Aid on a gaping wound. Those relationships were doomed from the start because no one was ever going to be her.
She came into my life like a whirlwind almost ten years ago and imprinted on my heart in a way that hasn’t lessened, even after all these years. No matter how much I tried to deny what I feel for her.
Still, there’s that voice in the back of my head asking me what Trina would think, and worse, telling me I’m not good for Emily. But I just can’t listen to that right now. For the first time in forever, things feel right. Like there was a piece of my soul missing for years and it’s finally found.
When I arrive at the small grocery, I take less than five minutes to run in and pick up a large carton of creamer and get back in the truck. I’m eager to get back to her, but I decide to make a stop at Elladine Bakehouse and grab a couple of donuts. It’s only a ten-minute diversion, and I know it will make her happy.
I’m back at the house by nine a.m. and am just about to put the creamer away when the creaking of the bedroom door opening alerts me that Emily is awake. I pour us both a cup of coffee and pull two small plates down from the cupboard.
When Emily pads into the kitchen, she glances at the steaming cups of coffee waiting on the island and a sleepy smile breaks out on her face. She walks over to me and stands on her tiptoes, giving me a soft kiss on the lips.
“You’re the best.” She turns and wraps her delicate hands around her mug and takes a sip. Then, she closes her eyes and releases a satisfied sigh.
“Well, if you’re impressed with a cup of coffee, you’re really gonna be happy when you see what else I have for you.”
Her eyes pop open. “Ooh, you know I love surprises.”
I chuckle. “Yes, I do.” I pull the donut box out from behind my back and her eyes greedily take it in.
“Is that what I think it is?” she whispers.
“If you think it’s a box with your favorite donuts inside, then yes, it’s what you think it is.”
Her pretty mouth curves into a sweet smile as she takes the box from me and bites her lower lip when she looks inside and sees the treats. Damn, there’s nothing she can’t make look sexy.
After we plate our donuts, I carry our coffee and she carries the plates outside to the covered area of the deck. I recline on one of the chaise-loungers and I pat the area between my legs. She doesn’t hesitate to climb into the space. And we pass the next half hour sipping our coffee and eating our donuts.
“Um, so I was thinking about going to a couple of open houses today. Do you want to go with me, or are you busy?”
I don’t mean to, but I know my arms tense around her, and I have to force myself to relax them.
“Oh.” I clear my throat. “I guess I could go with you.” It comes out harsh, though I don’t mean it to.
She sits up and twists her upper body so she can face me. “You don’t have to.”
I don’t miss the tension in her voice, and she moves to scoot off the chair. I’m faster than her, though, and I wrap my hands around her waist, pulling her back to me.
“Hey, wait. Don’t get upset.” She’s no longer actively trying to get away from me, but she’s also just sitting there with her back to me. “I’ll go with you if that’s what you want. I just didn’t realize you were still looking at houses. That’s all.”
“Why wouldn’t I be looking?” Her voice is quiet.
“I mean, I guess because of this. Us. I don’t know.” I run a hand through my hair, frustrated at my inability to be clearer with her. “Hey, can you turn and look at me, please?”
It’s a little awkward because of how we’re sitting, but she spins herself and sits cross-legged, facing me.
I reach up and cup her cheek when I ask, “What are we doing here? What is this between us?”
“I’m not sure,” she whispers. She turns her gaze downward, not meeting mine. “That’s why I thought I should keep looking for houses. I can’t just move in with you like?—”
I lift her chin so she’s looking at me. “What do you want it to be?” My heart races in my chest, fearful of her answer, no matter what it turns out to be. She shrugs and says nothing. “Em? Do you want to leave?”
“What? No. You’re one of my best friends, Charlie. And these last two weeks have been amazing. I love it here. I love being with you like this. And we don’t have to label anything right now, but I also need to know if this has the potential to be anything more. Because I know you, Charlie.”
I rear back. “What does that mean?”
“You don’t do relationships. Not really. So, I need to know if I’m something to you other than just a friend with benefits, or a… fuck buddy?”
There have been very few times in my life I’ve been angry with Emily, but I’m suddenly furious and need to get away from her before I say something I don’t mean.
“I need to get up.”
She must hear something in my voice because she immediately climbs off the chair so I can rise from it myself.
I take a few steps away from her and when my back is to her, I simply tell her, “I need some time by myself.” And I leave without waiting for a reply.
* * *
EMILY
Charlie’s been gone for forty-five minutes and I’m worried. It’s still drizzling out and I know he’s on the property somewhere because both of our cars are still here. But he’s not out chopping wood, which I’ve learned is something he does when he needs to blow off some steam. He’s done it a few times after coming back from his parents’ house. He’s not in his wood shop.
My anxiety is rising higher in my chest, so I throw on my rubber gardening boots and my raincoat and head out the door to go looking for him.
Fifteen minutes later, I’ve slogged through the mud, down the path to the lake, and I breathe a sigh of relief when I get to the clearing and he’s sitting thirty feet from me on one of the Adirondack chairs he put out there last week. I can see from this far back that his hair is damp, as is his shirt.
I approach him and sit down in the chair next to him. Neither of us says anything at first.
My voice is near a whisper when I finally speak. “I’m sorry if I hurt or offended you when I said you don’t do relationships.”
Charlie turns his head to me. “That’s why you think I’m upset?” His eyes narrow, his head shaking subtly.
“Well, isn’t it? You told me at Annie and Jack’s wedding you avoid relationships.”
“No, Emily. I’m pissed because you implied you might just be a fuck buddy. I’m angry that you’d even consider the possibility of calling yourself that. You’re not wrong that I don’t do relationships—at least I haven’t—but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to try with you, now that we’ve started this. You are the only woman I’ve ever cared enough about to dare to want more. Even if it scares me shitless. I wasn’t kidding when I told you once I unleashed my control with regard to you, there was no going back for me.” His voice trails off.
“Oh,” is all I force out.
“When, in the decade I’ve known you, have I treated you in any way to make you think I could just use you for a physical relationship?”
I look away, facing the water. “You haven’t. But this isn’t just physical for me, and that frightens me.” My words are a whisper.
“Hey”—he uses a thumb and forefinger under my chin to turn my gaze back toward him—“it’s not just physical for me either. Come here.” He guides me out of my chair and onto his lap then he wraps me in his arms. He presses his mouth against my temple and says, “Never diminish what this is between us again, okay?”
“Okay,” I whisper.
I tilt my head back to look at Charlie’s handsome face, and the intensity in his eyes is consuming. One of his hands slips into the hair on the back of my head as he lowers his mouth to mine.
The kiss is slow and sensual at first, as our warm mouths meld together, expressing all the feelings we don’t have words for yet. After a few minutes like this, I’m convinced I would melt into a puddle if his arms weren’t around me.
Then the kiss becomes deeper, more frantic. I moan as his hand that’s been caressing just under the hem of my shorts slides up further, my panties growing wet with my desire for him. His hard length pressing against my ass shows me I’m not the only one feeling the passion our kiss has stoked from an ember into a flame.
I’m aching for more friction, so I pull back from the kiss and watch as confusion spreads over Charlie’s face. It’s quickly replaced by the hottest stare I could ever imagine when I stand, step out of my boots, slip off my T-shirt, then my shorts and panties, all while never tearing my eyes off of him. I bend forward, sure to keep my eyes on his—my breasts grazing his chest—and grab his waistband. “Lift,” I order. When he does, I slide his shorts down past his knees.
“God, you’re so fucking sexy, Em. Jesus Christ.”
I climb back onto his lap, sliding my legs through the gaps under the armrests, straddling him.
As soon as I’m near enough, I bring my mouth to his, resuming our kiss. His delicious hands are all over me—my breasts, my hips, in my hair—as I grind my wet center along the length of his swollen cock. If I tilt my hips just right, the head of his dick slides across my clit with the most salacious pressure. Charlie breaks our eye contact to look down at where I’m gliding over him, back and forth.
“That’s right, baby, grind on my cock until you come. Rub that gorgeous pussy all over it. Because when I’m inside you and you ride me, I’m not gonna last long and I need to see you come.”
“God, Charlie. Your words,” I moan as I squirm against him. “I’m so close.”
And then he slips a few fingers between us and coats them in my slick arousal, and I watch as he brings those fingers to his mouth and licks them clean. I fucking come undone. Throwing my head back, my pussy feels like it’s exploding with pleasure so rapturous I swear it’s unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. Yet, as I come down from it, I’m desperate for him to be inside me, to fill me.
“In me. Now,” I beg. “Help me fuck you. Please.”
And as I lift, Charlie positions his hard cock under me and slides me down onto him, just like I want him to. Like I need him to.
“Faster. Harder,” I plead.
And he does just as I ask. Lifting me up and slamming me down onto his hard length just like I need it, until he can see on my face that I’m ready to take over again. He reads me like a damn book. Then, he lets me set the pace again, watching as I ride him.
It’s absolute bliss and I swear I didn’t think I could orgasm again after that first one, but I feel the familiar tightening deep in my center and I know I’m going to come a second time, while riding his cock.
Our moans fill the air around us and I love that I can be as loud as I want because there’s no one around for miles. I pick up the pace, falling deeper onto him until the waves of pleasure overtake me again and another orgasm consumes me. I don’t even try to stay quiet this time, screaming his name in the throes of my pleasure.
“Oh, fuck, Em. Your tight little pussy feels so good when it spasms”—thrust—“around”—thrust—“me.” And Charlie’s dick twitches in me as he spills his hot cum into my waiting pussy with a loud groan.
I collapse forward onto his chest, and he holds me together as we bask in the afterglow of the most amazing joining of our bodies, a light drizzle on our skin, cooling us from the hottest sex I’ve ever had.
After a few quiet minutes like that, Charlie speaks.
“Two things. First, I’m never going to fish down here again without remembering this. And… I have to tell Trina.”