Chapter Sixteen
Veronica
Your body has a funny way of responding when faced with high-intensity situations or when you’re in danger.
Some people spring into action, their bodies fighting to survive.
I always thought that would be me. A fighter.
Boy was I wrong… I can’t move. My body is fully aware of what’s about to happen, preparing itself for impact, yet I cannot fucking move.
I remain still, my eyes wide and tears burning.
My mind and body work against one another.
A contradiction of commands. My mind screams for me to move, while my body remains frozen in place as Priscilla grabs my arms, bringing me to the floor.
The back of my head resting on her shoulder, the scent of flowers overwhelming my senses, I still do not move.
Not even as Harry begins to remove my jeans.
Or as my stomach turns, making me sick with the urge to vomit.
I can hear the threats and curses coming out of Isaac’s mouth.
None of his words will stop what’s coming.
Won’t stop him from watching another man defile me in front of him.
“Ronnie,” he screams with desperation. “Mami,” he pleads.
“Look at me…” I think my gaze falls on him before it tunnels out.
My hand reaches out but he’s too far…. Iz.
. I want to stay with you. I want to lose myself in it.
That never happens. My legs are kicked apart, and the warmth of Harry’s skin brushes against mine.
Sending a wave of nausea through my body, settling at the pit of my soul.
I finally break out of my trance, or more so, my soul has left my body.
I lift my eyes and find hazel eyes looking at me, full of anger—so much fucking anger and sadness.
It’s so strange to me. To see him so angry.
I’ve seen him mad before, but this is different.
His face looks unfamiliar to me, wearing an expression I’ve never seen.
His teeth bared like a rabid animal, small particles of spit flying everywhere as he continues to thrash against the chains.
Crimson flows down his arms. Stop fighting…
you’re bleeding, I want to say, but no words come out.
All I can do is watch helplessly as he continues to fight like hell, can’t he see…
There’s no fighting this. It’s happening.
A single tear falls down his face as he whispers, “Stay with me, Ronnie. Stay here with me...”
I nod, or at least I think I do…
I’m here… Iz…
A sound I’ve never heard before slips past my lips when I feel Harry fill me.
I bite down on my sobs. I won’t allow him to break me.
Everything becomes blurry except him. Iz’s mouth moves; however, I couldn’t make out the words that fell from his lips.
I just watch as he thrashes and kicks. Time tapers down like a slow death, an agonizing crawl.
Each passing second feels like an eternity, each heartbeat pounds mercilessly against the cage of my ribs.
Harry’s movements quicken, and my nails dig into the ground.
I barely register the pain, the violation.
It all becomes background noise to the silent symphony playing in Isaac’s eyes.
“Stay with me.”
Those words become my life jacket, making it impossible for me to sink.
I focus on those three words as my stomach rubs against the cold concrete floor.
“Stay with me,” I repeat over and over. As much as I want to close my eyes to him, clinging to that connection desperately while my entire world caves in. Into a void, into nothingness.
Harry’s rough hands wander over me, seeking, claiming.
I feel a numbness creeping up on me, encasing me like an icy shield.
And I welcome it, fully leaning into it, accepting its cold embrace.
The world begins to spin faster and faster around me, and everything becomes hazy and distorted.
The body he’s ruining is here, but my soul is elsewhere.
Far away from his grasp. In a place where only Isaac exists and no one can ruin me.
After a few minutes, there’s no more thrashing, no more kicking.
Only stillness. Not the peaceful kind but the kind that chills you to your core.
He’s now just as frozen as I am. I'm sorry, baby. I want to reach out and comfort him. To shield him from watching this, even though it’s too late.
The damage is already done. A single tear slides down his beautiful face.
I can hear the sounds now. His deep grunts.
I can feel him too. His movements are more frenzied as he chases his release.
His hand snakes up my abdomen and under my bra.
I feel the numbness spread further. My body is nothing but an empty shell. I'm certain that I’m dying.
I have to be.
What else could describe the feeling of complete emptiness?
How else could I describe being a passenger in my own body?
How else could I escape the warmth that spreads through my insides as he spills into me?
I fix my gaze on Isaac, his eyes wide with horror and helplessness, the cold reality reflected in his golden orbs.
The final shudders of Harry’s satisfaction echo through my numbed senses, and I almost vomit right there.
“Iz,” I whisper, or at least, I think I do, but no sound comes. My heart races, not from the physical exertion, but from the sheer terror and revulsion.
Everything disappears. The weight of Harry behind me, the biting cold at my stomach—none of it reaches me.
All that remains is nothingness. I’m flying, or maybe falling, but none of it matters.
Shame and disgust blend into their own flavor as I curl into a ball, dreading the echo that remains between my legs.
I make the mistake of looking in his direction only to find him broken.
Iz's head hangs low, his forehead pressing against the ground as he sobs. Each sound reverberating through his body causes him to shake from the intensity. Don’t cry…
I want to say, but I close my eyes before opening them again only when the room grows quiet.
I could have sworn he wasn't breathing. And I could have sworn I wasn’t either.
Yet, my traitorous lungs expand with a burning breath reminding me…
that I’m alive. And this is my painful reality.
With time suspended, I float in the abyss.