Chapter 6 #2
Richie held me in the driveway, one hand on the back of my head and the other rubbing my back, while I stood there like a zombie. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t process. Too many things were coming at me all at once, and I couldn’t grasp a single one.
“We have to get the groceries inside,” I finally said, my voice sounding weird.
“What?” Richie jerked in surprise.
“We have to—” I shook my head and pulled away from him. “I can’t. We have to bring the groceries inside.”
“Baby,” he whispered gently, staring at me. “You saw—”
“I saw,” I confirmed, reaching in to take my keys from the ignition.
I didn’t say another word as we went to the trunk and pulled out all the groceries for Cian’s feast the next day. I felt like I was in a fog, but everything around me was warped and out of shape.
“Oh, good, you’re here,” Cian said, throwing open the front door as we got to it. “I called the doctor, and he’s going to call in a new prescription because he thinks her last ear infection never went away. We don’t have to do an appointment.”
“I got her some pain reliever,” I replied, moving around him with the bags.
Cian instantly stilled.
“Close the door, bud,” Richie ordered quietly.
“What happened?” Cian asked, his voice so quiet I almost didn’t hear him.
Richie didn’t respond, but they both followed me into the kitchen.
I couldn’t deal with the questions. Not yet. Not until I figured it all out. My mind was racing.
Mom was dead. She was dead in a body bag. She’d gotten into a wreck with a fucking semi and lost. Mom was dead. Mom was dead. Mom was dead.
Mom and Dad were both dead. We had no parents left. We were orphans .
Fuck.
“Don’t open that!” I ordered Cian, turning to see his hand on one of the bags.
He jerked his hands back like he’d been burned.
“What?” he snapped.
And then something in my mind must have snapped because I started laughing really hard.
I’d just panicked that Cian was going to see his birthday presents before I’d wrapped them while our mom’s body was laid out in a body bag on the highway for all the looky-loos to gawk at.
I could not believe that this was my life.
I mean, I’d dealt with a lot in my life, but this took the fucking prize.
“What’s wrong with her?” Cian hissed at Richie.
“Aoife, stop,” Richie ordered firmly. He pulled me away from the groceries on the counter.
I couldn’t stop laughing. I’d been holding it all together for so long—all for nothing.
Mom was dead. She would never be the mother I remembered from the first fourteen years of my life.
She’d never get her shit together. Aisling would never really know her.
She was dead, and they’d never give custody of the kids to me. Never in a million years.
My laughter stopped.
“Sit down,” I ordered Cian.
“What?” He looked between me and Richie. “No. What the fuck is going on?”
“Where are the rest of the kids?”
“Ronan’s outside,” Cian replied slowly. “Saoirse and Aisling are upstairs.”
“Good. Sit.”
Our staring contest only lasted a moment.
“She’s dead, isn’t she?” he asked roughly.
I clenched my jaw and nodded.
“Fuck,” he whispered painfully, his eyes still on mine.
“We drove by the wreck on our way home,” I said quietly. “The car was—” I shook my head. “There was a body bag, and the ambulance was just sitting there.”
“Maybe it wasn’t her,” he said quickly. “If the car was messed up, maybe it wasn’t hers.”
“It was.”
Richie’s hand wrapped gently around the back of my neck.
“How do you know?” Cian argued. “It might not be—”
“The bumper sticker,” I ground out. “The Irish flag one that Dad got her.”
I’d never forget the sight of that perfect bumper sticker on the back of her mangled-beyond-recognition car.
Cian just stood there. “What the fuck are we going to do?”
I looked at my brother with his messy hair and his blue eyes that were just like mine, the slight sunburn on his cheeks and the freckles that were barely visible across the bridge of his nose.
When we were little I used to sit on him and point out those freckles while he struggled and bellowed at me.
They’d take him from me over my dead body.
“We’re leaving,” I said, straightening. “Right now. Tonight.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Richie asked in disbelief.
Cian just nodded. He was with me.
“I just bought all this fucking food,” I said with a scoff. “Grab a cooler out of the garage.”
“On it,” Cian said instantly, hurrying for the door.
“Aoife,” Richie said, leaning down a little to look in my eyes. “What are you doing?”
“We have an aunt in Oregon,” I replied, already headed toward my mom’s room. “If we go there, I’m sure she’ll let us stay for a while.”
“That’s nuts.”
“It’ll work.”
It only took a few minutes to find my little box of keepsakes that Mom kept on the top shelf of her closet. The bedroom was trashed and smelled like cigarette smoke and ass, but those keepsake boxes never moved. I thought about it for a second and then pulled down the other kids’ boxes, too.
“I’m pretty sure that’s considered kidnapping,” Richie said angrily, following me around the house. “You’ll be crossing state lines.”
I dropped the boxes on the kitchen table and searched through mine. I’d been adding birthday cards to all the boxes for the past couple of years, and the one from my aunt was right on top.
With a return address on the back of the envelope.
“Bingo,” I muttered, shutting the box again.
“Jesus Christ,” Richie barked, swinging me around to face him. “This is fucking ridiculous. Slow down.”
“No,” I responded instantly.
“You’ll go to jail, Aoife.”
“No, she won’t,” Cian said, carrying two small coolers into the kitchen. He set them on the counter. “Mom was just talking to Aunt Ashley earlier, confirming that Aoife was planning on driving us out there for my birthday.”
“Jesus, you’re smart,” I said in disbelief, pulling away from Richie. “Start getting ice from the freezer.”
“That never happened,” Richie ground out, glaring at both of us.
“You weren’t here,” Cian said with a shrug. “I was. Plus, I’m sure there are phone records to prove it.”
We quickly packed the coolers and stood staring at everything on the kitchen table.
“I took out the cake stuff, but the rest of it should last us until we get there,” Cian said, glancing at me. “Fewer stops.”
“Yeah.”
Richie just stood there scowling.
“We need to get packed.” I gestured toward the unopened bag on the table. “Open it.”
Cian’s lips tipped into a small grin as he poured the new clothes out of the bag.
“Try them on before you pack them,” I said hoarsely as he held the jeans up to his waist. “Make sure they fit.”
“They’ll fit.”
“Try them on anyway.”
He looked back at me. “Thanks, sis.”
“You’re welcome.” I braced my hand against the table, suddenly exhausted. “Sorry your birthday turned into a fucking nightmare.”
Cian just shook his head. “What are we going to tell them?”
“I’ll tell Saoirse so she knows what to pack,” I replied softly. “We can tell Ro and Ash once we’re on the road.”
“Good call.”
“Go pack,” I ordered.
As soon as Cian had disappeared up the stairs, I turned to Richie. I didn’t think I’d ever seen him so angry.
“Try to understand,” I murmured.
“What happens if they show up to tell you about the accident, and you’re packing the car?” he asked, crossing his arms over his chest. “Or you get pulled over?”
“Her purse is on the coffee table,” I replied, swallowing tightly. “They won’t know who to notify for a while.”
“Then why don’t you wait?” he exploded. “You have time, right? Call your aunt and—”
“I don’t have her number,” I cut in. “Only Mom had it. I have an address. That’s it. We’re just hoping she’ll even let us stay! We haven’t even seen her since my dad’s funeral.”
“Tell me you see how insane this is,” he said.
“Tell me you see that I have no other choice,” I replied, staring into his eyes.
He was silent for a long time before his eyes closed and his chin dropped to his chest in defeat. “Fuck,” he whispered. “Give me an hour. I’ll go pack some shit and—”
My head jerked back in surprise. “What? No. What?”
“You’re not going without me.”
“You’re not going,” I argued.
“I am.”
“You have a life here!”
“So do you.”
“I have to go.” I threw my arms out in frustration. “You don’t!”
“You can’t stop me.”
“Richie, you have a job! A career! You can’t just bail. You’ve been working so hard. Plus, your parents .”
“I’ll be back in an hour,” he replied stubbornly. Stepping forward, he cupped my cheeks in his hands and pulled my face to his. “I love you.” The kiss was wild and desperate and wet.
The moment he walked out the front door, I was racing up the stairs with Aisling’s bottle of pain reliever in my hand.
“Hey, girlies,” I called, walking into the room. Ailing looked miserable on her bed, a coloring book in her lap.
“Hey, E,” Saoirse called from her bed.
“I brought some medicine.” I sat on the edge of Aisling’s bed. “Let’s see if this helps a little.”
Saoirse sat up in bed and watched me, and I wondered if I looked as crazy as I felt.
“The doctor sent me some medicine,” Aisling said, taking the chewable tablets from my hand. “Did you get it?”
“No, we’ll go get it in a little bit, though.” I stood and looked at Saoirse. “Help me real quick?”
“Sure.” The word was drawn out and suspicious.
She followed me to my room, and Cian was already there, sitting on the end of my bed, his elbows to his knees.
“What’s going on?” Saoirse asked nervously.
“Mom’s dead, Sersh,” I said quietly, not making her wait. “Me and Richie saw the car accident on our way home.”
“You’re sure?” she asked. When I nodded, it was like she slowly melted to the ground, her legs going out beneath her.
“Shit,” I blurted, reaching for her.
“I’m fine,” she cried quietly, pressing her forehead against my shoulder.
“Shoulda told Sersh to sit,” Cian said dryly from the bed.
“Not helpful,” I shot back.