Chapter 6
6
Cassidy – Twenty-Three Years Old
My heart pounds as I squeeze the steering wheel while my body shakes with the violent sobs that wrack my body, the hospital before me a blurry mess through my tears.
“I’ve fucking wanted you for years….”
I flinch at Brute's whisper echoes, and my breathing gets choppy.
That happened; it really did just happen….
I’d just left Colt’s room, no not Colt’s, Steal’s room, determined to finally leave him, to put myself first for once, only to be shoved into the kitchen by Brute, an older brother that has always leered at me every chance he got, while Faith stood in the doorway, grinning.
They planned it, she wanted me out of the way, not realizing I was leaving anyway, and decided to do something so horrific. She’s pure evil.
“All those times you walked around here with your snobby head held high, thinking you’re better than us, getting in between Steal and Faith,” he growls, and I fight against him, making him chuckle as he shoves my front into the counter, knocking the wind out of me, before he boxes me in.
I bring my elbow back, using the techniques Dad and Perrie taught me, but he sees it coming and grabs it before locking my arms down beside me with his arms, and then shoving his other hand down my jeans.
My pulse pounds, fear overtaking me, and I scream, “Get off!” hoping to get someone’s attention, hoping to get some help , but I’m cut off as he covers my mouth, his hand clamping down on me so hard that I know it’ll bruise.
I hear Faith giggle, and my tears fall when he tries to get into my panties, and realization hits— She planned this with him, to get me out of the way…. Oh God.
“Open your fucking legs, slut!” he demands, his rancid breath hitting my senses, making me want to gag. I squeeze my legs together and struggle against him, refusing to allow this to happen to me just because I fell in love with the wrong man. I slam my head back, causing pain to throb as I connect with his chin.
Crap, Perrie never told me how much that hurts….
Brute grunts, then, in retaliation, slams me harder into the counter, my lower stomach aching instantly. My legs weaken at the shock of the impact, and he shoves two fingers inside my dry entrance, and I sob.
“Oh, look at that, little Steal gets a tight pussy every night, huh? No wonder he decided to stick with you instead of Faith,” he goads as he roughly moves his fingers, causing pain to shoot between my legs before my eyes lock onto the knife near the edge of the counter.
“Hey!” Faith snaps but he ignores her as he continues, “I can’t wait to get my dick inside you, to show you how a real man fucks….”
I can feel my heart pound as wetness builds between my legs along with the pain, and I know he’s made me bleed.
Swallowing hard and refusing to be raped by this dirty bastard, I quickly grab the knife without a single thought, then twist my body hard, causing him to move his fingers out of me roughly and stumble back a little. One moment he’s glaring at me and he’s moving toward me again and the next his eyes are wide as I stab the knife into his chest.
My tears fall as he stumbles back, his hand going to the knife, but he doesn’t remove it, only keeps a grip on it before coughing. Blood spatters out of his mouth over my face, and everything in me stills as reality hits me. His body suddenly falls against mine, his blood smearing over me. I hear Faith gasp, and when Brute’s body falls to the floor, his eyes wide open but vacant with the knife still in his chest, bile rises.
Oh God, I’ve killed him….
An ache pulls me from my living nightmare, reminding me that he’s most likely torn my vaginal walls, and I sob harder.
I’m a killer, I killed someone….
I know it was self-defense, but it’s not the point, and the hatred Steal shot my way, the fact he held a gun to my head….
Oh God….
I quickly open my door and lean over before my stomach tightens, causing pains to shoot through me, and I vomit, heaving, while my tears fall.
He said he loved me, but if that was the case, wouldn’t he have heard me out instead of automatically taking her side?
“Faith saw her do it, and I trust Faith's words over hers.”
I sob harder, gripping hold of the door.
For our whole relationship, he’s taken her side, even when she got in my ear, claiming to be still screwing him, that they laugh about me when they’re in bed together. I smacked her for it, and he took her side, and so did the club.
His dad banned me from the club, for Christ’s sake, and ever since, she’s caused so many arguments that the club rallies around her now, even though I’m the one trying to get on with life, trying to be happy with a man who clearly didn’t want me.
He took her side again, his club’s side, when one of his brothers just sexually assaulted me while his precious Faith stood guard.
Bile rises again, and I cough while wretching in between hard sobs.
I was leaving him. I wrote him a letter and left it on his bedside table. I couldn’t cope with the pain any longer, being put second, especially during times when I needed him the most, like my father’s death anniversary where I stood on the Brooklyn Bridge, where I scattered his ashes, alone, and he was at a club family BBQ with Faith, something I was banned from attending.
I was officially done, only to be pushed into the kitchen and assaulted.
Slowly, I sit up and look at the building through my tears before taking a deep breath, determined to go inside and get checked out. I look down at my clothes to ensure I don’t have blood on me, but I sob harder, seeing I’m covered. My skin suddenly feels like it’s on fire, and my sobs get louder.
The need to vomit again hits, but I ignore it and quickly turn and grab the bag filled with clothes from Steal’s room, and pull out the first item I touch, which happens to be Steal’s t-shirt. I pull my tank top off, not caring I’m in a parking lot for all to see, and quickly put the t-shirt on, then grab my wet wipes and quickly wipe my hands, arms, and face, scrubbing hard, before throwing them on the ground with my top, all while I sob and shake like a leaf.
I need to get checked out, and then I need to leave. Mom won’t care I’m gone; she’s a bitch like that, but Perrie…she’s going to hate me. But I can’t risk her safety.
I still have some clothes and photos in my old room; I’ll collect them, then say goodbye to my sister….
With a wobbly chin at the thought of disappointing my little sister, I climb out of my car and walk into the ER with my heart in my throat. I notice it’s busy, and patients are scattered everywhere. Some look my way, frowning, and I wipe my tears before heading to the nurse’s desk, trying to ignore the all the curious gazes.
The brunette sitting behind the desk doesn’t look up, instead, she continues writing and says, “Please fill out this form and then take a seat," and then pushes a form my way over the countertop.
More tears fall, and without picking up the form, I whisper, “I was just sexually assaulted….”
Her head shoots up in shock, her brown eyes wide as she looks me over, and I start to tremble, causing her to jump into action.
She rounds the desk, gently takes my arm, and guides me to a cubicle as the other patients moan and groan. She ignores them, gently helps me sit, then disappears for a few minutes. She returns with a doctor I recognize from the welcome pack I received last week.
The man smiles as he grabs a rolling chair and sits before me, leaving enough distance to allow for my comfort. The nurse stays in the cubicle, which helps me relax a little.
I know this man won’t hurt me, but after what has just happened, my nerves are shot.
“My name is Dr. Carmichael,” he says softly. “Can I get your name, or do you want to do this without the formalities?”
My tears fall again, and I look at the older Dr with kind blue eyes and whisper, “It’ll be kind of hard to do it that way because I’m pretty sure you’re going to be my professor next year.”
His eyes soften, and he asks, “You’ll be attending New York Medical School?”
I sniffle. “I’m already a year in. My name is Cassidy Halliwell, and I don’t want the police involved….”
He nods slowly before asking, “Can you explain exactly what happened?”
I choke out a sob, and the nurse quickly rushes over to me and grabs my hand. I squeeze hers and admit, “I was-was attacked f- from behind and-and h-he shoved me into a counter…then h-his f-fingers were inside me….”
Dr. Carmichael nods and writes down what I said. “Any other penetration?”
I shake my head. “I-I managed to get-get away….”
“And any pain, blood?” he asks carefully, and I nod once to both, my tears falling hard.
“Okay, Cassidy…. I’m going to need to do a transvaginal ultrasound. If I could get a female doctor in here to do it, I would, but unfortunately, there isn’t one available, and we need to see what damage has been done to ensure, if any, that it is not permanent,” he admits, and I nod once. He continues, “I’ll also be checking for pregnancy as a precaution, okay?”
I nod again, and he sighs. “Alright, Nurse Hannah here will stay with you the whole time. If you can undress your bottom half and then cover yourself with the sheet.” He stands. “Now, I have to ask, are you sure you don’t want the police involved?”
I shake my head and lie, “I-I didn’t s-see him, a-and t-there were no-no cameras….”
He nods, concern rolling off him, but leaves before the nurse helps me stand on my shaky legs. My fingers tremble as I try to undo my jeans, and she quickly helps. I slowly remove my jeans and panties, but I let out a sob, seeing the blood in my underwear.
The nurse takes the panties, then squeezes my hand, before helping me sit back on the exam table, gently placing my feet on the stirrups, and then covers me as I lean back.
She calls for the doctor back in and quickly explains about the blood. He nods as he grabs the monitor and ultrasound wand.
My pulse quickens, and the nurse quickly grabs my hand. The doctor explains, “Alright, Cassidy. This is going to be a little cold, and you’ll begin to feel pressure. Try and breathe through it for me.”
I do as instructed.
“Alright, you do have some extensive tearing which will take a few weeks to heal, and you will be uncomfortable until then. I’ll prescribe antibiotics for you.” I feel him move deeper, and my body trembles, causing the nurse to stroke my hand gently.
“Be strong, my Cassy.”
Breathing becomes difficult, hearing my dad’s voice, but I take deep breaths, and the doctor praises me, “That’s it, Cassidy, you’re doing good. Your womb is….” His words trail off, and I look at him with panic until he presses a few buttons on the machine, and suddenly a whoosh, whoosh sound fills the room. I think I forget how to breathe.
“Cassidy, it seems you are nearly nine weeks pregnant. Were you aware?” the doctor asks, and I blink.
Pregnant….
I’m pregnant, with Steal’s baby, the same Steal who just dragged me by my hair and put a gun to my head after I killed his brother.
My head swims as dizziness takes over.
This isn’t happening; it can’t be happening….
“Cassidy?” the nurse says with concern, but her voice seems distant, and so does the doctor, who snaps, “Fuck, she’s about to pass out.”
As unconsciousness overtakes me, my final thoughts…I’m a killer and I’m pregnant….