Chapter 4
CHAPTER FOUR
C astle Stewart towered high above Fia’s head as she and Bane reached the gates. It was an impressive structure, with tall curtain walls surrounding the entire building and courtyard, topped with battlements. The gatehouse, right outside of which Fia and Bane had stopped, was reinforced with portcullises and arrowslits, which spoke of the castle’s great defenses. The keep, the main part of the entire structure, was just as impressive—dark stone topped with turrets, the kind of place Fia never thought she would even visit, let alone get to live in.
Fia gritted her teeth. Her heart was racing and her palms were damp with perspiration, her nerves getting the better of her, but she refused to show it. In the three days leading up to their arrival, she had been vibrating with excitement, unable to sit still for even a moment. She had hardly slept or eaten, so eager to get to the castle that every moment between her and her goal was as much of a reason to be elated as much as it was a torture. Now that she was there, though, her excitement had quickly turned into fear and apprehension.
What if everything went wrong? What if not only her plan wouldn’t work, but she would also fail in her tasks as a healer?
What if she saw Callum and all that pain and shame came flooding back?
Gracefully dismounting the horse, Bane reached for Fia, who had ridden with him the entire way to the castle. That, too, felt shameful—being lowered gently to the ground as the guards watched and laughed among themselves, all because she had never learned how to ride.
It was something to which she hadn’t given much thought in the past. She never saw the need to know how to ride, since she never thought she would have to travel that far or have the means to do so. She had long since come to terms with the fact that her life would play out and end in Duror, but now it seemed that everything was changing.
Should I ken how tae ride? Should I ask Bane tae teach me or is it too late now?
She was already twenty-three years of age. Was it even possible for her to learn? She was so unsteady and uncertain on a saddle, even when someone else was steering the horse.
“Is the lassie alright?” one of the guards asked as he approached them. He must have seen Fia swaying on her feet, she thought, as she finally had them planted on solid ground.
“Aye, she’s alright,” Bane was quick to say, stepping between her and the guard as though his very body was a shield. “She simply prefers tae walk. An’ our mare prefers us tae walk, as well.”
The men laughed good-naturedly, the tension breaking with ease. As he spoke, Bane patted the horse on the side gently. She was, indeed, an older horse, one that under any other circumstances may have been retired from transporting people, especially long distances. But Fia and Bane couldn’t afford another, and so the mare was all they had.
But that may change now.
“I take it that ye are Fia an’ Bane MacKenzie?” the guard asked. He was an older man, ruddy-cheeked and plump, and he seemed kind despite the first impression he had made on Fia.
“Bane Graham, actually,” said Bane. “But aye, that’s us.”
The guard looked at them with a small frown for a moment, surely trying to figure out why they would have two different surnames, but he didn’t press. Instead, he called two more guards over—younger, perhaps even more so than Fia—who began to search their belongings.
“I’m sure ye understand,” the man said. “It is fer the good o’ the clan.”
“O’ course,” said Bane. “We understand.”
Fia felt as though someone had stolen her ability to speak. She was never that silent or subdued. She never let Bane take over in a conversion, but now she felt as though she had no other choice, tongue-tied as she suddenly was. That place was affecting her in ways she could have never predicted.
She had expected a certain level of nervousness and awe, but what she hadn’t expected was that tinge of fear that kept gnawing at her insides, making her doubt herself, when only a few hours prior she had been so certain about her skills and her plans.
Suddenly, they were both being ushered inside the castle grounds, the main gate opening to reveal a bustling courtyard where servants and workers went about their day, some of them tending to the courtyard itself, the horses or the building as others carried all sorts of goods back and forth—wheat, barrels of alcohol, fresh meat. Fia had never seen such abundance before. Even in the village market, such riches were unheard of.
She and Bane couldn’t help but stop and stare in disbelief, eyes wide as they took in everything going on around them. Behind them, the guard stood with his hands on his hips, watching them in confusion.
“What are ye starin’ at?” he asked, startling both Fia and Bane. They turned around in unison to look at him, and the guard laughed once again, the sound full and delighted. “First time in a castle? It’s alright… ye’ll get used tae it quickly.”
Fia very much doubted that. How could one get used to such luxury? And this was perhaps nothing compared to the interior of the keep, where the laird and the other nobles resided. She couldn’t help but wonder what that place was like. Surely, it would have rich tapestries and paintings and all sorts of bright, gleaming things.
It was then she decided she had to see it. Sooner or later, she was bound to be allowed inside.
“Follow me,” the guard said, as he pushed through them and made his way around the courtyard and towards the back of the castle. Fia and Bane followed the man closely, both equally concerned that they would get lost if he left their sights. They soon came upon a small, squat building—a little larger than the cottage they had left behind in Duror, but also much newer. There were no holes in the roof, no missing stones in the foundation. The wooden beams seemed solid, strong, not worn out by termites and wind, and when they stepped inside, Fia was delighted to find that the area was divided in three, with a main room and two other rooms that served as sleeping chambers.
Each of them would finally have their own room, it seemed. That alone was a luxury she never thought she would have.
A room o’ me own… I can hardly believe it.
Bane seemed to be just as much in disbelief, looking around him with wide eyes and an awed look on his face. Fia had never seen him like this before. He was often laughing, often playful, often even irritated in that half-hearted way of his that betrayed his vexation as being little more than a show, but he was never stunned speechless.
“Is this fer us?” Bane asked, turning to face first the guard and then Fia with a bright smile.
“Aye,” said the guard. “The healer’s cottage is right over there, so this is the best place fer ye tae be.”
Fia followed the guard’s pointing finger through the window to see another building, this one much larger if a little older. So, that was where she would be spending most of her time from then on, it seemed. It wasn’t such a bad place to be, Fia thought, especially if the woman who served as the clan’s healer was nice.
But what if she isnae? What if she hates me?
Fia took a deep breath, grounding herself. The more she worried about things that could very well never come to pass, the worse it would be. She had gone there with excitement in her heart and a plan in her mind. She couldn’t let doubt, mostly the result of Callum’s cruel words, get to her after all, and the last thing she wanted was to let him have any sort of influence on her, even now that they were apart.
Everythin’ will work out. We are here. The first step has been taken.
“I’ll leave ye tae settle in,” said the guard, as he headed to the door. “If there is anythin’ ye need, ask anyone in the castle. They’ll ken how tae help ye.”
With that, the man was gone, leaving Fia and Bane alone. For several moments, they only stared at each other in disbelief, before they both burst out in laughter, Fia rushing into Bane’s arms so they could hold each other tightly.
“Can ye believe this?” Bane asked as they parted, taking some time to walk around the room. It had everything they needed, from a stove to chairs and even some modest decorations. A rug was laid on the stone floor and a fire already burned in the fireplace, which could only mean that someone had lit it to welcome them.
It was more than Fia could have ever imagined.
“I almost cannae,” she admitted, as she ran her fingers over the table that stood under the window. It was clean, with no trace of dust on its surface. In the village, it always seemed to her that, no matter how much she swept, there was always dust everywhere only moments later. “But it’s true, isnae it? We’re truly here.”
“We are,” Bane said. “An’ it is all because o’ ye. Ye ken that, right Fia? We’re only here because o’ ye an’ yer skills. So never listen tae anyone who tells ye that ye have nae worth. Never.”
As he spoke, Bane grabbed her by the shoulders and stared right into her eyes, his gaze boring a hole through her. She knew what he was trying to tell her—he didn’t want her to fall for another man who would be as cruel and beastly as Callum, someone who wanted to demean her and destroy her confidence simply because it amused him.
Bane had always been right in his assessment of Callum. He could always seen what Fia couldn’t, blinded by love as she had been. She knew better than that now. She knew that love mattered little when a man was so quick and eager to tear it right from her hands.
She didn’t seek love anymore—she sought revenge, and whatever path would benefit her the most.
“I promise ye,” Fia said with a firm nod. “An’ if I ever lose me head like that again, ye have me permission tae throw me in the dungeons until I come back tae me senses.”
Bane laughed, giving her a pat on the shoulder. “Well, there’s certainly a dungeon here. Shall I look fer it?”
“Let us hope it willnae get tae that,” said Fia. “I told ye me plan.”
At that, Bane sighed, taking a step back as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Aye, ye did. So ye’re determined tae go through with it?”
“I told ye I am,” Fia said. “An’ I need ye tae help me.”
Bane was quick to shake his head, raising his hands up as he took a few steps backwards from her, as though the physical distance could save him from this. “Help ye? Nay! Ye willnae trick me intae this.”
“I’m nae tryin’ tae trick ye,” Fia pointed out, taking a step towards him for every step he took back. “I’m askin’ ye.”
Just as Bane’s back hit the wall next to the fireplace, Fia gave him that look she knew he could never resist—a frown, her eyes damp, her chin trembling. It was a cheap trick, but it worked every time, ever since she had been a child, and it didn’t fail her now. She saw the precise moment Bane broke, his defenses falling down.
“Help ye how?” he asked. “I willnae dae anythin’ foolish.”
“Foolish?” said Fia with a short laugh. “Nay, naethin’ foolish. Ye only have tae make some… inquiries.”
It truly was that simple.