Chapter 12
12
brYCE
I fucking hate social media.
That sentence is as much of an “I’m not like the other girls” one that I could say, but I’m only being honest. Once I get started with scrolling, I get lost stalking every single person I’ve ever known in my life who’s upset me in one way or another.
I analyze their posts from the moment we grew apart to now. Are they happy? If so, how? Why do they deserve good things when they’ve hurt me?
There’s one profile I stray to more than the others. Victoria Clarkson is my archnemesis. With her tight black curls and sleek jaw and cheekbones, one look at her is usually enough to spoil my day.
Exes aren’t supposed to make you happy, obviously . But are they supposed to make you so lightning mad years after a breakup? No, they’re not.
Yet, I can’t stop my teeth from grinding as I swipe past the latest photo update of her and the man whose cock probably still has the shape of my foot imbedded in the shaft.
I might appear like I find it easy to hate people, but that’s not the case. In order to hate someone, you have to care about them in some way, shape, or form. Past or present. Usually, I can’t be bothered. But with Vic, I’ve long since accepted that I truly do hate her. If that makes me a bad person, then so fucking be it.
She’s to blame for the pain I experienced for months after learning she’d taken my refusal to start a three-way relationship as a reason to cheat. Only she didn’t believe it was cheating. Not when she’d been honest about wanting more than just me.
Could have broken up with me first before jumping into bed with her now fiancé, but what the hell do I know.
I squeeze my phone tight enough I’m surprised it doesn’t shatter in my hand and toss it across the desk.
“If I pick up your phone and I see a picture of Vic, I’m going to take it away from you for the next two weeks,” Poppy warns, appearing in front of the office door.
I scowl, leaning back in my chair. “What are you doing here?”
“That’s a terrible way to greet your best friend,” she says with a dramatic pout.
I eye her outfit, making a conclusion as to why she’s here just by the tight spandex shorts and cropped tank top. Her hair is in a tight, slicked-back ponytail, and her cheeks are still pale instead of flushed, so I must have been her first stop.
“It’s not Saturday. Don’t blame me for not expecting you.”
“You’re in a cranky mood today.”
I inhale, my eyes shutting as I reel myself back in. “Sorry.”
“You’re forgiven. Wanna talk about it?”
She rounds the desk and props herself against it, legs crossed at the ankles and expression open as she stares down at me. I lean forward and prop my chin in my palm.
This should be when I tell her that I have a “girlfriend.” It’s as good a time as any, but the longer it takes me to speak, the harder it is to tell the lie to her.
“You can tell me anything, Ice. You know that. Even if you think I’ll bug you about it, I promise to wait until you’re feeling better,” she adds teasingly .
I tilt my head and meet her eyes. A stab of guilt deep in my chest has me deciding to hold off on telling her about Daisy.
“I haven’t been sleeping well. And every time I go on social media, I see Vic and realize that I should just be the bigger person and block her,” I say.
“But if you block her, you won’t be able to see what she’s doing. I get it. We’re too snoopy for that.”
I nod. “If she posted something about me, how would I know if she’s blocked?”
“That’s valid. I’m all for keeping things the way they are as long as the real reason you haven’t blocked her is because you’re still into her. If there are feelings there?—”
“I’d rather pull each one of my nails off than have feelings for her again. That’s not it,” I declare.
And it’s the truth. I don’t want anything to do with that she-devil anymore. From the moment I caught her cheating and wound up spending a night in jail for breaking her now fiancé’s dick, I’ve written her off. The time apart has only furthered the chasm between us, and I’d rather slip inside of it and fall to my death than ever go back to the person I was with her.
But that doesn’t mean I don’t get random bursts of curiosity that lead me to her social media profiles.
Poppy laughs loudly, her face lighting up with humour. “Fair enough. Why aren’t you sleeping well? Your new roommate keeping you up?”
It takes more effort than it should to keep my breathing steady at the question when my heart jolts. I flatten my lips, contemplating what to say. How can I tell her that, yeah, it is because of my new roommate that I haven’t gotten more than a handful of hours of sleep at night?
Knowing Daisy is sleeping in the room beside mine is a temptation that I didn’t need. It’s a pain in my fucking ass and one that I know isn’t going away anytime soon.
Wetting my dry lips, I rip the Band-Aid off and get this over with. “She’s not only my roommate. ”
Poppy waves me off. “Yeah, yeah. She’s also Johnny’s twin and our friend. I get it. But that doesn’t answer my question.”
“She’s my girlfriend.”
Out of every reaction Poppy could have had, I wasn’t expecting the belly-deep laughter that explodes out of her. She curls over and wraps her hands around her stomach, as if her laughter is so strong it’s started hurting.
“Fuck off, Poppy,” I huff, using my foot to push away from her and the desk.
Her eyes widen as she watches me roll away, laughter slowly dying. “Cut the shit, Bryce.”
“You’re not supposed to know yet.”
“Stop lying to me.”
I itch the back of my hand. “I’m not.”
When she reaches for both of my hands and uses her hold to roll me toward her, I know I’m fucked. She narrows her eyes and thins her mouth.
“The truth. Now.”
“You sound like a parent.”
“I’ll punish you like one, too, if you don’t explain yourself. And I’ll add that I’ve known you way too damn long not to be able to smell a lie a mile away. And right now, you reek,” she scolds.
“You’re such a pain in my ass.”
She ignores me. “Explain, Ice.”
I pull my hands free of her tight grip and run them down my thighs. My clothes are too restrictive for me to relax, and I’ve never hated them more than right now.
“She is my girlfriend. But it’s not that simple,” I begin, replicating her glare with one of my own. “You’re not supposed to know anything more than that, Poppy. And I swear to God, I will lose my shit if you share this with anyone. Even Garrison.”
She worries her lip. “What about Anna?”
“No. No one else can know. I mean it. Even just you knowing makes this all the more complicated. ”
“Maybe you shouldn’t tell me anything else. I don’t know if I can lie to everyone,” she says in a rush, standing tall before starting to pace the office.
“That would be easier.”
She shakes her head furiously, the slick ponytail whipping through the air. “No, now I have to know. I won’t be able to let this go. But goddammit, Bryce! What is this? Some task from the FBI?”
“Not quite.”
With a long exhale, she comes back to my side of the desk and props herself against the edge. Her eyes are so focused they make me queasy.
“Tell me everything,” she demands, and I don’t make her ask again.
With a look around the office to make sure I haven’t missed anyone else entering, I say, “Daisy is my fake girlfriend. She’s going to help get my parents off my back with all of the blind dates by showing them that I’m content with a woman. Once they realize I’m not looking for anything they’ve been offering, we’ll fake a breakup and go our separate ways,” I explain, hating how devious it all sounds.
There’s so much that can go wrong here, and with my family involved, I’ll never live any of this down if the truth gets out. I’ll be a complete laughingstock to them and everyone in town, and the last thing I want is to drag Daisy down with me.
Poppy doesn’t say anything for a long moment. Her lashes flutter as she blinks furiously. I bury my head in my hands and groan.
“She offered. I should have turned her down,” I speak into my palms.
There’s sudden warmth on my back as Poppy starts rubbing my spine. “Maybe it isn’t such a bad thing.”
I whip my head to the side, staring up at her in disbelief. “Be serious. ”
“I am. I was shocked at first, but I know you, and you’ve liked her for a while, right?”
I put my face back in my hands in hopes she’ll drop this. “You’re wrong.”
“No, I’m not. Whether you admit it to me or not, I’m not blind like everyone else is. You’re into Daisy Mitchell, and that’s okay . You know that, don’t you?”
“Stop it, Poppy.”
She doesn’t know the whole story, and I don’t plan on explaining it to her anytime soon.
“Why? Because you’ll have to finally admit it if I push you far enough?” she asks, voice lifting in volume.
I spin to face her, forcing her hand to fall from my back. My skin flushes with an angry heat as I swallow my frustration. “She’s my fake girlfriend. That’s it.”
“Fine.” She raises her hands and shakes her head, brows high. “Daisy is your fake girlfriend. Now what? We just lie to everyone now? For how long?”
“You don’t have to lie. Just don’t say anything. Pretend you don’t know the truth and behave like everyone else. As far as how long this will take, that’s up to my mother.” And Daisy.
The moment she decides we’re done, we’re done. I’ll respect her wishes without hesitation. This is for me more than it is for her. Fuck, I’ve already told her she doesn’t owe me anything for letting her stay at my place.
Poppy rubs at her temples. “This is a terrible idea.”
“I know.”
“So call it off!”
The words are sticky in my throat. “I can’t.”
I don’t want to.
Her eyes dig deep into mine, searching for everything I’m refusing to say. But I hide my secrets so well even she can’t find them.
With a heavy sigh, she palms her hip and drops her stare. “I love you, Ice. Even when you do stupid shit. ”
“I know.”
“The least you can do is say it back.”
I roll my eyes. “I love you, you needy bitch.”
“That’s better.” She flashes me a smile and pets my head. “But really, I hope you know what you’re doing here. This isn’t just some random girl. She’s Johnny’s twin and a member of our little family.”
“You don’t have to remind me of that.”
“Yes, I do.”
“It’ll be fine. I’ve got it handled.”
Her expression tells me she doesn’t believe me for shit, and in all honesty, I don’t believe myself either. I feel completely out of control already, and we haven’t even really started.
“I’m here for you always. Don’t forget that,” she says.
“I won’t,” I swear. “Now, tell me what you’re doing here during the week. BB okay?”
She shrugs. “BB is great. I just missed teaching class here. Calgary is so busy that I feel like I don’t have as much one-on-one time like I used to in Cherry Peak.”
“Can you shrink the class sizes in Calgary?”
“Not until this one finishes. I will be for the next few. But until then, here I am. Are you busy, or can you join?”
“Right now?”
She looks around the empty room as if to show me how unbusy I am. “Yes, right now. There’s a class at one, and I thought you might join me.”
Fuck it. “Fine. But I’m throwing you under the bus if I get in trouble for leaving early.”
“Bring it on. I’ve never been scared of your mom.”
“What’s that like?”
Her laugh is soft. “For what it’s worth, I hope this plan of yours works. Your mom is unbearable.”
I stand and reach for my phone, the app still open from earlier. Surprise ripples through me when it isn’t a picture of Vic on the screen but one of Daisy. It’s a close-up selfie from . . . my couch? My breath is caught in my throat as I stare at her flawless skin and bright eyes. Her smile is wide and honest, and the dimple in her right cheek threatens to make me weak in the knees.
I’ve never been into dimples until Daisy.
Poppy’s laugh startles me, drawing my attention from the picture.
“Fake,” she says, rolling the word around on her tongue like it’s something foreign. “Right.”