Chapter 22 #2
“When you joined the teams, I fell for you,” he whispered.
“I wanted you. Desperately.” He paused for a beat.
“But then my cousin died in a car accident. What you don’t know is that my father was behind the wheel of the car.
He’d gone to Spain because Thiago had called and requested he come to Barcelona.
At the time, I didn’t know he was even there.
He said they were arguing, and he ran a red light.
” His hands became knots on top of his jeaned thighs.
“The passenger side was hit by a truck. Thiago was killed instantly. And my uncle blamed my dad for stealing his son.”
Oh my God. What could she say to that?
“Luciano didn’t want my dad to die. Too easy, he’d said.
He wanted to make him pay for stealing his son, the heir to his so-called throne.
” Guilt swam in the dark pool of his brown eyes.
“My uncle wanted to take his only son from him. Not by killing me, but by turning me into the man he believed I should have always been, the man he always wanted me to be. Someone like him.”
“Roman.” She urged him to stretch his legs out so she could straddle him. She had to have her arms around this strong man who really had been holding the weight of the world on his shoulders. So much more so than she’d realized.
She should have always known Roman’s actions would be selfless.
His reasons for keeping them apart had to have come from a place of love, even if it didn’t feel like it at the time.
Even now that she knew the truth, she was still upset he’d kept everything a secret, but at the moment, she only cared about putting her arms around him. Letting him know he wasn’t alone.
When she hugged him, a gruff sound rose from his throat. Rather than a sob, it was the sound of anguish. Relief she wasn’t abandoning him, perhaps.
They stayed like that for a few minutes until she had the strength to peel herself back to find his face. Her hands settled on his shoulders as he observed her with tenderness in his eyes, his hands on her hips.
“I learned the truth about my family and how they built their empire on the backs of others after Thiago’s funeral.
I’d been clueless before then. I didn’t know the brutal lengths they’d taken to amass their wealth.
They aren’t mafia, but they made Spain a safe haven for mobs and mafias from around the world to conduct business.
All while looking like saints for the legitimate jobs they created.
My dad chose to leave the life and that dark world when he met my mom.
My uncle’s reach didn’t extend to the U.S.
, and honestly, Luciano probably didn’t care that my dad wanted out.
That only meant he didn’t have to share the money and power. ”
And then Thiago died.
“But I got to know my uncle and cousins before Thiago’s death, and my uncle and Thiago had started to push me to move to Spain.
” He paused for a breath—it was a lot to hear, let alone share.
“I had no clue about the man my uncle was, or I’d have heeded my dad’s wishes to stay away from the family.
But my parents withheld the truth my entire life, up until my father had no choice but to share, that is. ”
“Why not tell you?”
When he found her eyes again, his look said it all. His father had done things in Spain before moving to Florida, and he didn’t want to share that truth with his children.
“He preferred to erase his life and his sins from before he met my mother. Act like it never existed. But he could have warned me. And when Thiago began to press for me to move to Spain and help him run the businesses, my father should have come to me first instead of going to Barcelona to warn Thiago to back off. Plus, he would have learned I’d never considered moving anyway. ”
When Roman had returned from the funeral in Spain, he’d acted differently. More withdrawn than ever, and she’d assumed he was in mourning.
“My dad said he believed Luciano truly would punish him by hurting my sisters if I didn’t accept his proposal. He said we had no choice but to honor his demand—a life for a life. Son for a son.”
“He asked you to sacrifice yourself to save your sisters?” And, of course, how could Roman not protect them? Roman lived for his family, and everything he did was to keep those he loved safe.
“He tried to offer himself instead, but Luciano refused. I think my uncle really thought that after enough time, he’d mold me into the man Thiago had been, the man my cousin hoped I’d be, too.
The idea of one day handing over his empire to someone that wasn’t blood didn’t sit well with him.
And the last thing he wanted to do was turn things over to his daughters. ”
“So, your father ran away from Spain to have his own family, and then he forced you to shoulder the burden?” What kind of man would do that to his son?
“He didn’t have a choice,” he said softly, clearly not holding a grudge against his dad. “But he also knew me well enough to know I wouldn’t just surrender. That I’d eventually find a way out. To fix things. Keep my sisters and mom safe.”
That’s what you do. What you’re always trying to do. Fix things. Help others. Neglecting to take care of yourself, though.
“I asked for more time after the funeral. I didn’t want to leave the teams. Leave you.
” He shook his head as if in defeat. “He gave me until my thirty-ninth birthday since that was the age Thiago was taken from him. We’re always so busy operating, and since I knew I had until I was thirty-nine, I let myself forget reality sometimes.
” He closed his eyes. “Luciano was great at reminding me, though. From time to time, he’d force me to help him do certain things.
His way of blackmailing me as extra insurance, and so I didn’t forget the deal. ”
That explained the body. Her stomach grew shakier by the second as her skin grew clammy.
“I’ve had to do things I’m not proud of,” he shared with a hoarse voice.
“Short of killing, though. He, um, also extended his threats to my brothers on the teams. You and Jessica. Everyone at Scott and Scott. Other friends, if I didn’t follow the course.
” His tone was lower when he spoke again, “And this is why I should never have risked being with you last year, but I broke. I lost my restraint because my feelings for you are . . .”
Even after all of this, he still struggled to share his emotions. Maybe he was afraid saying the words aloud would put a larger target on her back?
“So, what’s the plan? You have to have one.
I know you. You’re too smart not to figure a way out of this.
You bought yourself more time, but you can’t really consider leaving Echo Team for that man in May.
” She shifted off his lap when panic set in.
Her hand went to the wall for the support she needed to rise on shaky legs.
She had to help him find a way out of the dark and back into the light where he belonged. But what could she do to help? She was bound by the same rules of engagement as the rest of the team . . .
“Emilia. She’s who you’re going to go to when it’s time, isn’t she?” Harper murmured at the startling realization. When she whirled toward Roman, who was now standing as well, her towel came loose and fell to the floor.
Nostrils flaring, eyes almost black with intensity, Roman dragged in a deep breath and slowly lowered his gaze to take in her body.
“You’re going to go to her for help instead of us,” she said, hating the knife of betrayal that cut her at the idea he planned to turn to another woman, a vigilante, for help.
Emilia had told her at New Year’s when the team assisted her vigilante group, The League, in taking down her nemesis, The Alliance, that she and Roman were only friends, and they’d only ever been friends.
And it was crazy to be jealous, especially when Emilia was now engaged to someone, but .
. . it was more than that. He’d go to vigilantes instead of his own team, and that hurt. So damn much.
“If we hadn’t come to Spain, and your uncle hadn’t gotten mixed up in our case—when would I have found out all of this? Would you have left a ‘goodbye and good luck’ note on my desk before disappearing in May?”
“You’re naked,” he whispered as if she didn’t know, or maybe it was a plea to cover herself.
“You know every inch of my body. You know me better than anyone. I don’t care,” she rasped. “But you’re going to her for help. You’re turning to Emilia and not me.”
He gently gripped her wrist and stepped closer.
The man before her now wasn’t the guilty and broken guy who thought he was a failure and a liar to the teams. This man was a bull ready to charge, and she was in his way.
His target. The passion between them was so intense and pure, even in a moment like this, it was hard to deny.
But they’d spent months and months trying to do exactly that, and they were both on the verge of breaking.
“Don’t think that.” His dark brows slanted together in a frown. “Harper, please.”
She shifted free of his hold and backed up against the vanity counter.
His lips rolled inward as if attempting to suppress the harsh truth yet again.
Or to keep himself from smashing his mouth to hers.
To reach for her, part her legs, and yield to desire.
Because it would feel better than the truth or facing the ugliness of the double life he’d been living alone for years.
“Tell me.” Her hands went to the counter on each side of her for support. If seeing her naked was hard for him, that was fine with her. She had no more secrets. Nothing left to hide. He was the one who needed to deal with the uncomfortable truth that he’d planned to abandon her.
He turned to the side and placed both palms on the wall. He took a few seconds. A few deep breaths. “I planned to leave after my birthday. To leave the teams,” he said, his tone almost brutal and harsh, and he carried his gaze her way. “I planned to leave you, yes.”
Her heart was going to break.
No, scratch that.
It was already broken.
“You let me fall for you, and then you were just going to leave?” She pushed away from the vanity, tears building in her eyes. “Just turn your back on all of us, then ask Emilia to help you find a way to kill your uncle while keeping everyone safe?”
“Emilia can cross lines that I can’t ask you to,” he said in a low voice as if determined not to lose control, but he was on the edge looking over the cliff, and he just might jump.
He abruptly pushed off the wall and faced her. He was so close she had to raise her chin to look up at him. Nearly felt his chest touch hers with each ragged breath he drew in.
“Does she know the truth? Did you tell Emilia all of this when you couldn’t tell me?”
He pinned her with a hard stare, one that sent chills across her skin. “No.”
“And Carmen? Is she involved in all of this insanity?” She cupped her mouth when a surge of insane jealousy struck her. “Carmen wants to marry you, doesn’t she? Stay in the family.”
“That’ll never happen,” he promised, his heated gaze falling to her body again. He was struggling not to pull her into his arms.
When he reached for her, she recoiled.
The look of hurt in his eyes at her rejection was too painful to witness.
Roman was nothing like his uncle. That man was the devil. Roman was a man doing everything in his power to save the ones he loved. Nothing had changed.
But he planned to leave her. Leave Echo. To fight a battle without them. Couldn’t he have at least provided them with a choice, let them choose whether or not to cross a line and kill?
Roman took two steps back and brought a hand to his mouth.
She placed a little distance between them and snatched the towel from the floor, realizing the insanity of standing naked before a bull without expecting to get hurt. “How does it end? How will you do it?” She wrapped the towel around her body and held it in place.
They still had a messed-up case to solve, and now this. It felt like they were at rock bottom of a barrel of too many whiskey-tango-foxtrots. What the fucks.
“To take my uncle down, to ensure everyone is safe, I have to take over. At least, temporarily. It’s the only way to gain loyalty from his men and prevent them from following Luciano’s command to hurt anyone if he dies.
And the economy in Barcelona will, um, take a pretty big hit if all of his legitimate businesses go under,” he said in a steady but grave voice.
“People can’t afford to lose those jobs. ”
He was always so caring, and despite her frustrations with him, she still couldn’t help but let go of a small sigh.
“But when it’s all done, there are only two ways it can end.” The blunt truth hit her hard as he whispered, “Prison or death.”
“What?” No, no. That . . . “You need to tell the guys the truth. You can’t do this to them.
You can’t just sacrifice yourself like this,” she said before nearly collapsing, and Roman caught hold of her arms and kept her upright.
“You said when we split up, we’d still be friends.
And that was a lie. We can’t be anything if you’re dead. ”
An ugly cry tore free from deep within her chest as she played out the possibilities in her mind. And she knew Roman and his super brain must have calculated them all, which meant he was certain of the outcomes.
“I’m sorry. I was trying to protect you,” he murmured. “You have to believe me. I never meant to hurt you.” He cupped the back of her head and tried to pull her closer, but she resisted.
She was too angry.
Angry at the cancer that had stolen her mom.
At the terrorists who’d killed her dad.
At the traitors who’d betrayed their country.
And now angry at love.