Chapter 18
Violet
No. No. No. No. No!
“That’s amazing!” Kenzie said from beside me. “I can see the calendar now. I’m going to purchase ten copies. Wait until my friends hear about this.”
“No, it’s not good. It’s not good at all,” I managed while I tried to grab Steel’s arm. “Wait.”
“Why? So you can lie to me again? So you can pretend you give a damn?” He jerked away but was in my face, his eyes flashing with rage.
“All this time you were just baiting me? You need me for what, your cover model for this stupid calendar? Renting the house. The fight. The dog. Yeah, you even had the dog put there in the rope. Didn’t you? All for your stupid calendar.”
“That’s crazy. I would never do something like that.” People were crowded around, trying to figure out what was going on. My heart hammered in my chest and I barely managed to get any words out that made sense.
“Oh, yeah? I wouldn’t put it past you. I know your type. You’ll do anything to get what you want. What about the passion we shared? Was that all a lie too?”
“Of course not. I care about you.”
He laughed and the sound tore through me, ripping me apart an inch at a time. Shaking his head, the snarl on his face was a clear indication he had no intention of talking to me.
Maybe ever again.
This is exactly what I hadn’t wanted to happen. “Steel! Please. I tried to tell you several times.”
“Well, you didn’t try hard enough. Go away, Violet. I’m sure you can get a ride home. You have a fan group already. But I want no part of your goddamn calendar.”
He waved me off, backing away and within seconds, he disappeared into the crowd.
Far too many of the customers were enthused, but I could tell by the look on Axe’s face he had an inkling about what was going on.
“I take it Steel didn’t know,” he said, his tone much less friendly.
“I…”
“You what? Decided to use him to advance your career?”
“What’s wrong with you?” Kenzie pushed Axe away, giving me space. “This is an amazing opportunity. Imagine the publicity, good publicity for a change since there are some people in this town who don’t think very highly of smokejumpers right now.”
“So what? My brother isn’t for sale.” He was close to yelling.
“Don’t yell at my mom!” Damon snapped, my little man still trying to protect me.
“It’s okay, baby,” I said, fighting to get the words out.
I closed and rubbed my eyes. I’d seen the look on Steel’s face. Betrayal. He’d told me something so personal and I’d lied to him. He’d never forgive me. “This is horrible. How did they find out? Why? Damn it.”
“Talk to me,” Kenzie said, keeping her face away from Axe.
“Mom. What’s wrong?” Damon asked, fear in his voice. “Why is Steel angry?”
Damn. Damn. Damn. I had tears in my eyes as I peered down at him. “Remember Mama is always reminding you to tell the truth?”
“All the time.”
“Well, she didn’t take her own advice.” A single tear fell and I was overwhelmed.
“What is going on?” Kenzie said, pulling me aside. “Why is Steel so angry? It’s such a great honor.”
“Not for him,” Axe said. “You know how he is, Kenz.”
“He didn’t know about the calendar. I haven’t had a chance to tell him. He thinks I moved next to him on purpose. Just to get close and… I didn’t. Karma decided to kick me down.”
“Then you need to tell him that.”
“I did. He wouldn’t listen. He won’t listen.”
Kenzie tugged on my arm, so I was forced to face her. “Then tell him again. The one thing I know about the Beckett brothers is that they have very hard heads. It takes a few times of telling them something for them to finally hear you. I’ll stay here with Damon. Okay? Just go.”
“Why bother? Why?”
“Because you love him, Mom.”
My son’s little voice was jarring.
I was completely numb inside, totally numb. I barely knew the man, yet it felt as if I’d known Steel for so long. That’s how strangely close I felt and how much I’d enjoyed getting to know him.
“You’re sure? I don’t know how long it will take.”
“Absolutely. Go.” Kenzie nodded, offering a smile. “It’s obvious you care about him and he might have a thick head, but he cares about you too.”
“Damon. Don’t leave Kenzie’s side.”
“I won’t.”
Nodding, I backed away, wiping my eyes as I turned. In pushing my way through the crowd, a couple of people tried to stop me, but I refused to allow them. While I’d tried a number of times to share the entire story with Steel, I couldn’t lie and say I’d tried hard enough.
As soon as the early evening air hit, for some reason it set off another cataclysm of emotions. I was struck by the random feelings of being furious with myself even while my stomach churned not just from frustration but also from fear.
What if the Jeep’s system had been rigged and the act had nothing to do with the gang of kids? What if in addition to this bullshit I’d caused with Steel, I’d also placed him in harm’s way? Tears trickled down both sides of my face as I rushed through the vehicles toward where he’d parked.
A screech of tires caught my attention, the rumble of an engine one I easily recognized.
He had every intention of leaving me here.
No way. I might not know much about the man, but what I’d already learned was that he wasn’t just hardheaded.
When he made up his mind to do something, like shutting me out without allowing me to give a decent explanation, there was no turning back.
If he managed to make it out of this parking lot, we would be done.
He roared around the end of a group of cars, heading for the exit and toward me.
That left no choice about what needed to happen.
In a rush of anger, fear, and utter irritation with the man, I jumped in front as he barreled down the path.
For a few seconds, it seemed as if he wasn’t going to put his foot on the brake.
But I refused to budge, standing firm with my arm thrown out.
The sudden stop was followed by a squeal of the tires, the car swerving to the right and almost hitting a telephone pole. There were seconds between the Camaro skidding to a full stop and the driver’s door being thrown open, and the powerful, visibly enraged man jumped out.
“What in the hell are you doing? What? Are you trying to get yourself killed?” He stormed toward me, maybe expecting I’d cower and retreat.
Not a chance.
I remained where I was, taking shallow breaths as I prepared to face the ugly storm. He lashed out, now only inches away, his finger pointed at my face. “You are… You’re so goddamn infuriating. I could have killed you.”
“You wouldn’t have.”
“You have no idea who I am.”
“I know enough to realize you’d never purposely hurt me.”
“Oh, yeah?” he gritted out.
“Oh, yeah.” We were barely inches apart, both breathing rapidly, his chest rising and falling. He was so tall, so broad chested.
And so angry with me.
Maybe I was angry with him as well for thinking I could do such horrible things.
He huffed and puffed and we both glared at each other, our anger on full display given the ambient glow of the headlights. An audience had formed, standing around us in a tight arc as if expecting a brawl.
As he closed his eyes, I could tell he was cursing under his breath even if I couldn’t hear what he was saying. Maybe I just didn’t want to. “Why did you lie to me?’
“I didn’t lie. I’m here earlier than my team to take pictures. Both location and test shots of the people I want involved.”
“And you just happened to move into the house next to mine.” His nostrils flared and his voluptuous lips twisted in the same heightened level of emotions I was feeling.
“Would you like the phone number of my assistant who found the house for me?”
“At your direction.”
“Damn you. I’m sorry about your guilty feelings regarding your brother. I’m really sorry I didn’t have the chance to tell you the full reason of why I arrived, but I assure you it wasn’t about crawling into your bed.”
“Don’t you dare mention my brother. Either one of them!”
I was so exasperated I gawked at him. “That’s your burden to bear, but I didn’t want to hurt you. I should have wrangled you away from that fire today to tell you.”
“Then why didn’t you?” He took a step closer as if daring me to answer.
My God. I’d never seen anyone so angry.
“How many times do I need to tell you I tried?”
“I don’t believe you,” he snarled, but his tone was softer.
The crowd was getting bigger. This was crazy. Now I was completely exasperated.
“I did try. Maybe I knew how you’d react, at least after…
Had I known just how personal the situation was, I wouldn’t have made this suggestion in some crazy attempt to save my job.
A job I need because the worthless man who I trusted refuses to even acknowledge his own son.
Refuses. Not one card. Not one present. Not one visit.
Not one dollar. And you know why? Because my little boy is a scandal for him.
Yeah, that’s right. He’s married and I was stupid enough not to find that out first before I dared place my trust in him.
God. I wish I could go back eight years so I could change course and not walk into that bar.
I get why you’re angry with me, but I wasn’t the one who took the photograph that went viral.
And I’m not your ex. I would never sleep with anyone else if you and I were…
together. But we’re not. I’m just some chick you had sex with and spent the night.
I wasn’t one of your groupies sending you marriage proposals over the internet.
I was just trying to do something that might make us all a little bit of money and provide your team with the notoriety they deserve.
All while hoping to give my son a better life.
And how dare you think I would use a poor little puppy in some scheme.
How dare you. So fucking sue me for wanting to be close to you. ”
Oh! I’d never been this livid, not even with Kenny. This man, this gloriously sexy man with the deep voice and penetrating eyes could wrangle every emotion out of me.