Elijah #5
Milo gave another little gesture. “I mean...yeah. Do we...stop loving our family because we fall in love with someone else? Do our friends stop mattering because we get a boyfriend or girlfriend that we fall for?”
“Those are three different types of love,” she said, raising a brow.
“I know,” he said with a sigh. “And maybe I’m just talking out of my ass, or out of a hope or delusion that I pushed onto myself years ago, but...I don’t think the heart just magically has a capacity for love, even the romantic kind.”
Eva turned her gaze to me, her lips giving a wry twist. “I’m sure this is absolutely fantastic for you to hear, considering you’re probably trying to date this idiot.
Please tell me that you’re actually trying to make something serious out of this and that all this bullshit isn’t just because you discovered a new and interesting way of getting your dick wet. ”
“It’s serious,” I told her with a roll of my eyes as Milo’s shoulders tightened and then eased as he followed my lead.
As much as I wanted to tell him we were probably in the safe zone and didn’t have to worry about what she would say or do, that was also a good way to get right back into the danger zone.
Her temper was cooling down, and her heart was warming up to what we were saying, but being stupid enough to say that out loud when she probably didn’t want either of those things to happen yet was a quick way to shoot ourselves in the foot.
“I know I haven’t exactly won myself a lot of trust points right now, but you can trust me.
Trust that I’m not just screwing around. ”
“Right now, I’m not exactly feeling charitable with the trust,” she said with a sour look.
“Eva,” I said, torn between emphasizing my exasperation at her stubborn refusal to let go of her anger, letting it get the better of her, and trying to plead with her better nature to get her to calm down so she could hear us out.
Her expression twisted before her eyes rolled up to the ceiling and held there.
“Fine, fine, I may not feel charitable about whether you’re trustworthy for me .
But I know when it comes to Milo, you’re not going to fuck around.
That last fight we had wasn’t just because I was pissed; I was being honest. Well, I was pissed and being honest, but whatever. ”
Milo’s brow pinched together. “What does she mean? I thought you said your last fight before you broke up was because she accused you of being emotionally unavailable and intentionally keeping her out. You accused her of being dramatic and overly demanding of your space.”
I watched Eva’s frown return before she gave a huff. “Well, that pisses me off. But it’s fair to say that the jury found us both guilty on those charges. There was a little more than that, though, so apparently I’m not the only one who gets locked out of parts of his life.”
“I don’t need to be involved in every part of his life,” Milo said softly, turning toward me. “But this feels like something that has to do with me.”
“It didn’t involve you, or shouldn’t have,” I told him, frowning at her. “That was an argument between us, about us, your name shouldn’t have come up, which is what I told someone at the time.”
She rolled her eyes. “Actually, I believe your words were that it was fine if I was a bitch to you, but I didn’t need to be a bitch about Milo.”
“You were being a bitch.”
“And you were being an obstinate prick.”
“Mm, true.”
“Great, you’ve both made peace with the fact that you’re not very nice people when you’re pissed off and frustrated,” Milo said in annoyance. “Congratulations, you’re like everyone else on the planet.”
“Not often I see him get testy,” Eva remarked, looking Milo over in what looked like positive appraisal. If there was one thing Eva could be counted on to enjoy, it was a good dose of bitchy snark from someone, which Milo was starting to radiate.
“It happens,” I said with a sigh when he turned his newfound annoyance on me and narrowed his eyes.
Great, I had already caught hell from her, and now if I didn’t start talking soon and explaining, I would catch it from Milo.
Why the hell was it that the person who was the least prone to losing control of their emotions ended up being the target of those who did?
“Look, it was just...something she said during the argument. I don’t remember the exact words, but?—”
I tried to remember because fuck, if I got it wrong, Eva would be all over me with corrections, and it would frustrate Milo even further.
“I told him,” Eva said with a shake of her head, “that it was kind of fucked up that the only person who seemed to have access to his stupid head other than him was you. Everyone else gets locked out, even when they’re supposed to be the girlfriend he loves and talked about the future with.
That all there’s ever been for him was you, which is really weird when it’s his brother we’re talking about. ..and he’s straight.”
“I might or might not have asked if she was jealous of you.”
“And I told him damn right I was, because if it weren’t for the fact that all evidence pointed toward dipshit here being completely hetero, I would have wondered if there was something else going on between you two other than a bromance that still outpaced any real romance.”
Milo cocked his head at me, frowning. “And why wouldn’t you tell me this?”
“Because it was a fight between the two of us, and it wasn’t the first time we’d argued about something like that.”
“And you never thought to tell me that I was an issue in your relationship?”
It was my turn to get annoyed, raising my brow at him.
“Really? Because there’s no way in hell with the relationships you had that your feelings for me didn’t somehow get in the way?
I distinctly remember you telling me you dropped a guy after a few dates because he thought our relationship was weird. ”
“That is not the same thing as you getting in the way of a relationship like this is.”
Eva snorted. “Hold your horses there, buckeroo, you’re starting to toot your own horn a little too hard there.”
“What?” Milo grumbled.
“Eli’s gotten a lot wrong...especially lately, fuck you for that by the way, but he’s not wrong about that .
It was an argument between us, and you never did anything to make that fight happen,” she said with a shake of her head.
“Don’t go thinking that you’re so damn important that you caused a major problem between us.
He did that just fine on his own by being him; you just so happened to be a prime example of how there are apparently some exceptions to his closed-up, fortress of a brain.
I wasn’t mad about you. I was mad because clearly he did let people in, but the only one was you at the time.
Apparently, that’s even truer than it was before. ”
“I...don’t know how to feel about that,” Milo said slowly, looking deeply confused.
“I’m just uncomfortable,” I muttered, rubbing at my face. “And I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d feel bad about it when you didn’t do anything wrong.”
Eva groaned. “And there’s that.”
“What?”
“Your...I don’t know, constant need to take responsibility for other people on your shoulders. Like, only you know how to make things better or how to handle things, instead of just...letting people deal with things the way they want or need to. You’re not responsible for the world, Eli.”
“Wow,” Milo said dryly. “That’s sounding very familiar. Something I was trying to get across to him about two minutes before you FBId our door.”
“Just be glad I didn’t ATF it.”
“We don’t have a dog for you to shoot.”
“Ooh, sassy!”
“Really?” I asked in annoyance. “This is what you two are doing?”
“What?” she asked with a shrug, walking around me and going into the kitchen, her voice drifting out along with the sound of beer bottles rattling.
“My issue is with you, bud. It’s not up to him to talk to me about this; that was all on you.
If I had thought for a second that you were into any sort of dick action, I would have brought it up ages ago. ”
“Why would you need to bring up me being potentially bi?”
“No, I meant I would have talked to him.”
“Me?” Milo wondered, now standing up and looking at her in confusion. “Why me?”
She smiled around the bottle as she took a drink and set it down, standing near the door to the kitchen.
“Baby boy, I could never prove it, but deep inside, my gut told me you had a thing for the dipshit. Didn’t really see a point in bringing it up because you did do a pretty good job of hiding it, at least enough that I could only wonder instead of knowing you did.
Plus, I’m a bitch, but I’m not cruel. If I was right and you had a thing for him, what would be the point of bringing it up?
To rub your nose in the fact that you couldn’t have him.
..I mean, you had him in a way I never could. ”
“And you had him in a way I never could,” Milo said with a shrug.
Her lips curled into a smirk. “I’m pretty sure you’ve had him in a lot of ways you never could before lately...and in ways I never could. He let you anywhere near his ass?”
“Answer that and you’re sleeping in your own bed for a long time,” I warned him. Which was a good call because his mouth snapped shut and a sheepish look crossed his face, telling me he was getting ready to spill the goods right then and there.
“Sorry,” Milo said, his cheeks taking on color. “I’d love to give you details, even if it’s just as a little truce between us, but I kind of like not having to sleep alone.”
“I bet,” she said dryly. “At some point, I’m going to get mad that I lost out on the most reliable, and probably best sex I’m going to find in a long time. And you’re hogging it all.”
“I am,” Milo said, face still red, but a note of pride and happiness in his voice made me want to slap him and kiss him. “Sorry.”
“You’re not sorry at all.”