Epilogue
TWO MONTHS LATER
[Judd]
I ’d been thinking about getting a new tattoo. One that matches my mother’s ring before it becomes another lost memory when the strangest thing happened.
In the 1990 film Ghost , the main character has lost her beloved and he haunts her. Not as creepy as it sounds, and Genie and I have recently watched the movie. In the film, Sam proves he’s present but sliding a penny against a door and then miraculously handing it to Molly as she watches it float through the air to her.
“Tell her it’s for luck,” he says.
The movie led to a discussion between Genie and I about ghosts, and believing in spirits. Not necessarily the bad kind but the healthy, watchful kind like a guardian angel.
I’ve heard stories of people who have an item that reminds them of a lost family member and how it mysteriously appears or moves about a house.
Quarters seem to be the story I’ve heard most often. A son who lost his life had a private joke with his family involving quarters, and the family would find quarters in odd places, like the middle of a bookshelf or on a bathroom sink, as if their forever-gone-child was sending a message, reassuring the parents he was okay.
Backing up, my attachment to my mother’s ring started with a nearly forgotten memory of my father toying with the ring on his smallest finger. Just twirling it around the tip of his finger because his digits were too thick to wear something so delicate.
“Don’t ever fall in love, runt. In an instant, your heart can shatter.” The moment might be the only endearing one I remember about my father and his love for my mother. His backward advice evidence of how broken he was.
I remember him then fisting the ring in his hand and tucking it back in the nightstand drawer. Being a creature of habit, he didn’t move the ring around which made it easy for me to find, and admire, and eventually steal from him when he threatened to throw it in the trash.
So, the ring became this talisman of my mother and when it was lost, while I finally accepted maybe I wasn’t meant to keep it, the loss was still difficult.
Then . . . the ring was suddenly sitting on the island counter.
“Genie?” My throat catches and her name is more of a low croak than an actual call. As I stare down at the ring, my heart hammering in my chest, I can’t move. Like my limbs are frozen in place. For a moment, I wonder if I’m having a heart attack.
“Genie,” I squeak again, my voice rough.
“What’s the matter, baby?” She eventually finds me stone-still staring at the island. She’d set up her new office in our dining room, loving the natural light and the large table as a desk for now.
“Did you . . .” I can’t find the words. My throat is dry. My eyes are stuck on the thin gold band with an amethyst stone and two small diamonds. “Did . . .”
I swallow thickly still unable to form sentences.
Genie must follow my line of sight because she eventually gasps. “Oh my God. Is that—” She rushes to the edge of the counter, hovering her hand over the ring but then pulling back like it might not be appropriate to touch something so precious.
“Judd,” she chokes out. “Where did you find it?”
Slowly, her head turns, glancing at me over her shoulder but I still can’t move. Still can’t force myself to step closer. To touch it.
“I . . . I didn’t.” I blink, lick my lips and then pull my gaze from the ring to lock onto Genie’s eyes. “I was in the library. And then I was crossing the room to the dining room.” I glance to my left as if I can see myself leaving the library and walking toward the dining room before doing a double take when something shiny caught my eye.
“I—” I’m still at a loss for words. How? Where? Why?
Since losing my mother’s ring, and Genie giving me a new ring of my own, I’ve had one designed for her as well. With a silver band to match mine, Genie’s ring has a square cut amethyst in a slightly darker shade than my mother’s ring, plus a ring of diamonds around it.
“Do you think—” I swallow again. “Do you think it’s a sign? From my mom?” I close my eyes suddenly feeling childish for the thought, and like a child, hopeful and innocent in asking.
“What do you think?” Genie asks. Her voice low, concerned but full of patience and love. “What do you want it to mean?”
I open my eyes and look directly at Genie. “I want it to mean she’s happy with me.” My choice in Genie. What I’d done to get the ring and how long I’ve kept it, waiting until I could give it to the girl I thought deserved it.
Losing it wasn’t a curse or an omen. Losing it was a sign to finally let go of my past and race toward the future. Chase Genie, like Trudy once said I should have done.
“But why would it reappear now?” I can’t even ask the questions of where has it been, or how did it get on the counter, in broad daylight on a random Tuesday morning.
“Maybe your mother is sending you a sign. That she is happy. She’s resting in peace.”
It never occurred to me that my mother might be restless in her afterlife. Watching what her husband did to her children, if she could. Sensing our loss in both her and him, and then ourselves along the way.
We each had our vice or our shield or our wall preventing us from giving love a chance.
Maybe that’s my sign. My chance is now. My battle is no longer against myself but with my person.
Weathering the storm with Genie at my side. She’s my good luck charm.
“I think.” I pause. “I think, maybe it’s time to just save the ring in a safe place.” Not beneath my clothing on a chain or on Genie’s finger in the open but some place special.
Maybe with that lucky penny I’d given Genie, and she made her wish on.
Genie looks a bit nervous as she watches me a moment, gauging with those dark eyes with flecks of light how stable I am with the idea of storing such a precious ring.
“I like the idea of saving it. For the future.” Her hand covers her lower belly, flattening against it. “Maybe one day, we can give it to someone else who is special to us.”
I stare at her a moment, not comprehending her meaning.
“We could give it to our little girl. Or our boy. Whatever.” Genie shrugs and drops her gaze, chewing at her lower lip.
“Our . . . what . . . or . . . what?” I’m a stammering fool suddenly.
Genie’s face turns light pink. “We’ve been going at it like fireflies.” She giggles anxiously at her own joke. Genie decided to stop taking the pill weeks after moving in with me, and she isn’t wrong. We have sex a lot, although I am not complaining.
“Are you saying . . . Genie, are you pregnant?”
Genie nods, still biting her lower lip with concern.
This is a welcome surprise and one I’m still trying to wrap my head around, but I step toward Genie, tug her to my chest and hold tight.
“Genie. Oh my God, firefly. I love you so much. I love this so much.” Panic rushes in and then washes back out.
Maybe this is the sign. I can love both my wife and my future child. I can do this. I am strong.
“Genie.” I press her away from me by the shoulders. “We’re having a baby?” I ask again like she didn’t just confirm it.
She chuckles as tears fill her eyes. “I had the whole birth announcement planned. The unicorn paper and checking yes to being a dad, but now feels like the time to tell you . . . Judd, we’re going to have a baby. We’re going to be a family.”
Her voice chokes on the final word. Judd, Genie, and baby makes three. Our family. One Genie and I will protect at all cost, fighting every day to show our child love.
While all of this is still a shock, I hug my fiancée again, then scoop her up in my arms. I want to celebrate us, and her, and our future.
“Wait? Is this okay?” I don’t want to do anything to jeopardize our little one.
Genie laughs, scooping her hand around my jaw. “Cadence says being pregnant made her extra horny.”
I scoff, knowing I can’t get much hornier around my beautiful firefly.
But I’ll give her all the love and sexing she wants, or needs.
Any wish of hers will be my desire and I know she’ll be granting my wishes right back at me.
+ + +
Thank you for taking the time to read Sterling Fight .