Chapter 16
Sixteen
JADE
Fifteen years ago
Xander’s dick is huge. It’s all I can think about as we sit outside on the patio of this gorgeous restaurant while the sun sinks low over the Pacific. Golden light filters through the palm leaves as they sway in the gentle breeze.
Every time I sneak a glance at Xander, he catches me.
I am so ashamed at the way I watched him stroke himself through the fogged up glass.
It crossed so many boundaries, not that he seemed to mind.
Thankfully the sun I’ve gotten on this trip disguises my embarrassment and keeps me from fully turning pink.
I partially listen to Mom and Stephen as they talk about the projects they have coming up. Apparently, they’ll both be out of town a lot over the next four weeks, not always at the same time but occasionally overlapping. My belly flutters at the thought of being alone with Xander.
“Jade?” Mom’s voice cuts through my thoughts. “Honey? Did you hear me?”
“What?” I look over at her. “No, sorry.”
“That’s okay.” She smiles and looks out at the view. “The view is distractingly gorgeous here.”
Xander agrees with her, but when I look at him from the corner of my eye, he’s staring at me. “I could look at the view for hours, and it wouldn’t be enough.”
“What did you say?” I ask Mom, ignoring the innuendo from my stepbrother.
“I was talking about when we’ll need to start shopping for your dorm room. Have you and the girls picked a theme for decor yet?”
“No, not yet. I think we’re going to lean into the school colors for inspiration but make it fun and girly. That’s really all we’ve talked about.”
Mom’s eyes light up. “I love that. Maybe soft patterns like gingham or florals?”
“Maybe. I’ll talk to them when we get back and see what they’re thinking.”
Mom is definitely more excited about all this than I am.
She didn’t finish college because of getting pregnant with me, but she did go to beauty school to become a makeup artist. From there she kind of fell into special effects makeup and that became her passion.
And she’s one of the best in the business if all her awards and accolades are anything to go by.
“How about you, Xander? Have you heard anything from Juilliard?”
He shakes his head. “Not yet. I feel like this late in the summer it’s probably not going to happen.” For the first time on this trip, he sounds low.
I hate it.
“Their loss.” Something inside me drives me to reach across the table and squeeze his hand. “Who wants to live on the frigid east coast anyway? Surf over snow every day of the week.”
He looks from our hands to my face, and his expression softens. “I would miss surfing.”
“Exactly,” I return his smile and pull my hand away.
A dark-haired older man approaches the table with an absolute bombshell of a woman on his arm.
Stephen stands and gives both of them a hug.
They’re vaguely familiar, and then it all clicks when I hear their names, Thomas and Brianna.
I met them briefly at the wedding, he’s a friend of Stephen.
The hosts and our server bring over a table, so we can all sit together.
The conversation thankfully turns from college. Both Xander and I try to politely pay attention as our parents catch up with the newcomers to the table. But each of us keep sneaking looks at the other.
I force myself to stop looking at his face and decide to turn my attention back to the pink and orange horizon.
People walk hand in hand along the beach as merchants carry their wares off for the day.
A young couple catches my eye as they chase their toddler through the sand, their laughter carrying over to us.
“Cute kid,” Xander remarks.
“I know.”
“Do you think you’ll want them someday?”
I pull my gaze from the family back to him. “I don’t know. Maybe. Not until I’m well established in my career, though. You?”
He shrugs a shoulder. “I’ve never thought too hard about it, but I’d probably be okay with having one someday. When I’m in my thirties or something. I haven’t been around kids, though, so that might change my mind.”
I nod and watch as he lifts his beer to his lips.
How have I never noticed how full they are before?
His eyes stay on me the entire time he takes a drink.
I watch as his fingers skim some of the condensation off the bottle as he sets it down.
The back of his hand is covered in a web of thick veins which only serves to remind me of the one running the length of his shaft.
Just like that I’m thinking about his dick again. Fucking hell.
How am I supposed to pretend I didn’t feel it nestled against me in the pool today though? I didn’t even realize I was arching into him until his bulge grazed my pussy, sending hot waves of need under my skin.
It was crazy how instantly I wanted him. Like a switch flipped inside my body and he went from someone who’s becoming a friend to me to the forbidden fruit I can’t stop fantasizing about. My nipples pebble beneath my dress as he looks at me with matching intensity in his gorgeous hazel eyes.
As dinner winds down, Thomas and Brianna invite our parents out to a bar for a few more drinks. While I could join them, I need space from Xander. To breathe and get my head on straight. This growing infatuation could turn into something more if I don’t get a handle on myself.
“I think I’ll just go back to the house,” I tell everyone as we walk out onto the sidewalk in front of the restaurant.
“Xander, why don’t you go with her so she’s not alone,” Stephen says.
“I’ll be fine by myself,” I start to protest.
“No.” Stephen holds up a hand. “It’s never good to split up on your own in a foreign country.”
He’s not wrong.
“It’s not a problem.” Xander walks over beside me. “I’m tired from earlier anyway.”
Stephen looks him up and down closely. “You did mention that wipe out surfing. Thomas is right here if you want him to look you over.”
Thomas narrows his eyes and looks Xander up and down. “What happened?”
“Nothing. Literally just had my ass handed to me by a wave.”
“Did you hit your head?”
“Nope.” Xander waves him off.
“If anything changes, let me know, and I’ll swing by tomorrow to check you out.”
“I’m fine.” Xander steps behind me and wraps his hand gently around my bicep. “Our ride’s here,” he says as a sedan drives up.
Mom gives me a hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Be safe. Text when you get back to the house.”
The car is compact, so after I get in and slide across the back seat, I can still feel the heat radiating from Xander.
His thigh brushes mine several times, and my hoe body lights up at each innocent touch like the lights on the Vegas strip.
I would pull out my phone to bring up the group chat and distract myself, but the last thing we were talking about was how big his dick was.
I don’t want him to glance over and see.
The silence between us lingers. He doesn’t seem bothered by it in the least though, as he opens the surf forecast app on his phone to check conditions for tomorrow.
As we enter the gates of the community of beach houses, I look out into the night sky.
The moon is full above us, shining silvery light down.
It’d be a gorgeous night to walk on the beach.
The car pulls up to the house, and after thanking the driver, we walk up to the front door.
We still haven’t exchanged any words, and despite my own internal struggle about my changing feelings for him, it’s not an uncomfortable silence.
He closes and locks the door behind us as I walk down the hall toward my room.
“Do you want to go for a walk on the beach?” he asks just before I reach my door.
“I was just thinking about doing that. The moon is so beautiful tonight.” I push my door open. “I’ll change and be right out.”
“Okay.” He gestures toward the back of the house with his head. “I’ll wait out there for you.”
I make quick work of taking my sundress off and grabbing a pair of shorts and a hoodie. Knowing it’ll probably be breezy down on the beach, I toss my hair up in a messy bun. The finishing touch is a little swipe of lip balm. I forgo shoes, no point when we’ll be walking on the sand.
Xander looks up from his phone when I step out onto the patio. “You look comfy.”
“I am.”
He leads the way down the stairs to the beach.
Even though the path is unlit, there’s enough light from the moon to illuminate the way.
The sand is still warm from the heat of the sun as my feet sink into it with each step.
I follow him to the water’s edge where waves lap on the shore.
The waves are the smallest they’ve been while we’ve been here, but there are still obvious rip currents spread along the beach.
“I’m sorry for making you feel uncomfortable today.” Xander surprises me with the apology. “I should have covered myself up.”
“Don’t worry about it. It wasn’t just you. I shouldn’t have stared. You didn’t make me uncomfortable.”
“Well, it’s hard not to stare when confronted with that type of magnificence.”
I laugh and give him a little shove. “So humble.”
He flashes his full, unguarded smile at me. The one that showcases the dimple in his cheek. Butterflies riot in my belly as I return his smile with one of my own.
Then I remember where I am and who I’m with. These feelings aren’t okay. He’s my stepbrother. Firmly off limits. We’re just friends.
Just. Friends.
“This is my favorite version of you,” he says as we start walking again.
“What?” I look over at him. “What do you mean?”
“In the moonlight on the beach.” He kicks at the water lapping over his feet. “You feel less burdened. Freer somehow. I don’t know, it just…”
“It just what?” I grab his hand to stop him.
He turns to me; his eyes, a swirling mix of brown and gold, look so conflicted as they search my own. “I don’t want to make things weird by finishing that sentence.”
His eyes dip to my lips.
“What if it doesn’t make things weird? What if whatever you’re thinking is mutual?”
He hesitates and then leans forward, pressing his forehead to mine while he reaches into my bun and pulls the elastic band out, freeing my hair. Our lips are so close, the air between us shared as our breaths feather against each other’s mouths.
“Fuck it.”
I barely get one gasp out when he presses his mouth to mine with the type of groan that tells me he’s been thinking about this as long as I have.
His fingers dive into my hair as he tips my head back for deeper access.
I press my body against his and run my fingers up his sides.
Every divot and plane of muscle quivers beneath my touch.
Every stroke of his tongue against mine sends a rush of heat rolling through my body.
I press my thighs together as my core aches with pulsing need.
A kiss has never felt like this. I whimper against his lips as his other hand slides under the back of my hoodie and strokes the skin of my waist. I love the feeling of his piercing against my tongue.
“How is your skin so soft?” he whispers against my cheek. “Fuck. That was so much better than I ever imagined it could be.”
How long has he been thinking about this? Longer than me? If there were signs, I definitely wasn’t picking up on them.
I push those thoughts to the side and rise onto my toes, kissing him again with a fervor to meet his own.
His cock hardens between us, the now familiar length of him twitching between our heated bodies.
My hair dances around us in the breeze as I memorize every second of this moment to replay later.
I don’t know how long we stay locked together like this.
It feels like it’ll never be enough. He could lay me down right here in the sand and take me, and I wouldn’t say a word except please.
I can feel my pussy growing wet just from making out with him like this.
How much better would it be to have his fingers or tongue buried in me.
He breaks the kiss again but presses his forehead to mine to stay connected. “We should stop. Dad and your mom could come home anytime and catch us.”
“Yeah.” I nod my head, the movement accidentally brushing our lips together.
Then we’re kissing again. Our tongues moving against each other frantically, as if we’ll never kiss again and need to experience as much of each other as we can.
The last thing I want to do is stop. We can’t go further than this, it’s the only thing keeping me from pushing him down onto the sand and straddling his hips to grind on him until we both come.
The passion of the moment is broken by my phone vibrating in my hoodie pocket between us. We break apart and take a step back from each other. His lips are swollen, and his eyes wild as I pull my phone out to see it’s a phone call from Shan.
He motions for me to take it while he adjusts himself. I feel his eyes on me as I walk back to the house to take the call out of the wind. I love her, but she has absolute shit timing.