Forty-One
I t turned out that I was the biggest asshole in the room, and not the man I’d started to see as a killer without any fucking evidence, or even the merest suggestion of anything like that in him.
“Jesus, brother, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… fuck.. you never said about any of that.”
Has-Been turned then, looking nothing like the carefree man I’d known so far.
“Why the hell would I tell anyone? You know what it’s like having that shit happen to you? Having to deal with being that fucking helpless, and useless. Knowing that nobody would ever believe you if you told? Why the hell do you think I left the business as soon as I had control over my life? Why the hell do you think I was a mess when I joined the club? If I wasn’t off my face on something, I had nothing but memories to fucking terrorise me.”
He took a deep breath, smoothing his cut, which we all always put on the moment we were dressed. It wasn’t just a fucking article of clothing, it was everything. It was our club colours, the uniform we wore with pride. It was a vital part of each and every fucking one of us.
“ This club fucking saved me. Gave me something to be a part of. A life. A family. A family who wouldn’t use me, or prey on me, or… Jesus… I was gonna say, or accuse me of shit I couldn’t possibly do. You all just seem to see some fucking asshole who ended up on porn sites, because he trusted the wrong fucking woman. And apparently now, you see a fucking rapist and murderer. Fuck. I… I can’t be here right now. Think what you want about that, but I’m out of here.”
He slammed the door behind him, and we all sat in a stunned silence for a moment.
“Jesus.” I had to pace it out. I was agitated as fuck, because everything had started going wrong again, and I was part of the problem. I’m usually the one stepping between the others, and this time I was the one getting in someone’s face, and making a total prick of myself.
“Where the fuck did that even come from, Stitch? He’s never shown any sign of being violent towards women. He’s never given you any reason to think something like that of him.”
I dragged my fingers through my hair, letting out a string of curses.
“Yeah, look, I defer to you and Reacher, you’re my Pres and my VP, but that was fucked up and you know it. I didn’t mean to out his fucking past like that, but someone had to put you in your place.” Ryder stood up, glancing at Reacher instead of me.
“Can I go after him, Pres? I’ve never seen him like that before.” Reacher nodded, waving him away, and for the second time in as many minutes, my door was slammed hard.
“Fuck. What the hell was I thinking?”
Reacher was watching me as I paced.
“Talk to me, brother. You don’t say shit like that without something playing on you. What happened?”
I glanced at Ice, who’d stayed unusually quiet this whole time.
“Did you know?”
Reacher followed my gaze, and finally Ice lifted his head.
“What? Oh… not necessarily, but I had my suspicions. I mean, it’s a dirty game innit, being a kid in that industry, during that time period. Although they’re still getting away with that shit. You get me some names, and I’ll find the fuckers.”
“He was a real mess when he came here. You remember how fucking dependent he was. Took him a year just to clean himself up again. So you went to get him, and you came back thinking he was a serial killer or something?”
Jesus. I was just being an asshole, wasn’t I? I’d been so sure he was up to something though.
“He was being, I don’t know, cagey. He wouldn’t let me see into his room. He closed and locked it to get ready. I mean, I know it sounds like bullshit now, but it had me on edge, because we knew what we knew, and suddenly he was acting out of character.”
“Cammy? You look like you know something.” I frowned at Reacher, and crossed the room to look at my wife. She shrugged, but he was right, she looked sheepish.
“No, sorry. I was miles away, that’s all.”
“If you know something about Has-Been, you need to tell us.”
Cammy
F uck. There was no way I was outing Elise and Has-Been to these three, not at any time, but especially not now when Stitch was already seeing Has as the bad guy. He wasn’t, he clearly wasn’t, but if he could think this of him, then there was no way he’d accept him as his baby sister’s man.
“I’m sorry, it’s just, this is a lot to take in, and I’m not sure I should even be here. I’m only an old lady, right? This is club business.”
Reacher snorted. “Ever since we started pairing off, it seems like a lot of rules went out the window, love. I’m just surprised this room isn’t full of women right now. I practically had to threaten to tie Ally to the bed to get her to wait for me.”
Ice rolled his eyes. “Lissa has a hangover, so she’s sleeping it off. She’d be here otherwise.”
I still couldn’t believe Lissa of all people had hooked up with a biker. She’d changed so much in such a short time.
“Maybe I should go check on her? She might need something.”
Ice grinned wickedly.
“Gave her everything she needs already, but sure, go ahead. She loves being woken up, especially when she’s got a headache.” Ouch. Good point, still it was better that I left them to it, because apparently I was too easy to read.
I stepped up close to kiss Stitch, and he wouldn’t let me go with just a peck, dragging me into a kiss that we really shouldn’t be indulging in with his brothers right there. Finally one of them groaned.
“Seriously, it’s like a permanent fucking porn channel living here.” That was Ice.
“I’ll be back soon. Try to relax a bit.”
Stitch nodded, but he was still looking at me with those searching eyes, because he could tell I knew something, and I wasn’t sure how long I’d get to keep Elise’s secret.
When I reached Lissa’s door, I tapped on it lightly, and she actually opened it. She was even dressed, which I was surprised about when I found out she was hungover.
“Wow, Ice said you were out cold.”
Lissa grinned. “He also fussed over me with painkillers, and water, and coffee, before he left the room. He’s really sweet like that.” Huh… didn’t sound like the man he showed everyone else. That was actually kinda sweet too.
“I had to get away from them for a bit. Why is it some people can look at you and instantly read the shit you’re trying to hide?”
Lissa fixed me with a look, and raised an eyebrow.
“Oh wow… you are hiding something. Not very well, since you just told me as much. I take it you’re looking to talk to someone who can’t tell anyone what you say?”
I dropped onto their leather sofa and let out a frustrated groan.
“It’s not even like I know much, but I know enough, and it’s going to drive a wedge between me and Stitch, and we’re finally getting to just be us now.”
“Oh! Speaking of, how’s the tattoo doing?”
“It stings a bit. I think I slept on it by accident, because let’s face it, I was pretty wasted.”
She smiled, bringing two glasses of water to the table.
“Water? Really?”
She shrugged, curling up in the armchair with her legs tucked under her.
“I don’t know how long we have before Ice returns, so get talking.”
“You’ve seen how ridiculously overprotective Stitch is with Elise, yeah?”
Lissa giggled. “The whole bulldog grrrr thing where nobody’s allowed to look in her general direction?”
“Exactly! I don’t mind the caveman thing with me, but he needs to let her live her own life. She’s twenty-one, dammit.”
Lissa raised her eyebrows.
“And?”
I groaned. “Promise this stays confidential?”
At her glare, I held up a hand.
“Fine, sorry. Okay… it’s just that I know she has a thing for one of the bikers, and it seems the feeling is completely mutual. It’s actually pretty adorable. She’s mad about him, and he’s trying to keep her at arm’s length because of who she is. Last night, I caught them kissing, and honestly, I think he’s plenty good enough for her, but you know Stitch won’t see it that way.”
Lissa looked worried, and who could blame her, right? The shit could really hit the fan when he found out, and let’s be honest, at some point he would obviously find out.
“It’s one of the good ones, right? I mean, you don’t have to tell me who, but it’s not Torch, right? Or Micro? They’re both pretty twisted, not that they’re alone in that, but I definitely don’t think she could handle either of them.”
I shook my head. “Trust me, I’d be worried if it was either of them. Micro is a mouthy bastard, and apparently voted against me and Ally being old ladies. Torch kinda scares me, but he’s only ever been friendly to me.”
“Micro voted against you? What the hell for?” I shrugged, wondering why the hell someone who didn’t even know me would vote against me. It bugged me more than it should.
Stitch
“ S he’s hiding something, brother.”
Reacher wasn’t wrong.
“I know. I’ll figure it out, but for now, we need to find out as much as we can about what happened to Chrissy. We need to talk to this roommate of hers, and see who else has been in her life recently. The answer is out there somewhere, and we need to find it before the police, if we have any hope of avenging her.”
Ice nodded, keeping his eyes on his screen, but lifting a thumb in agreement.
“I’m getting what I can. If you can give me a few hours, I’ll do a deep dive, and get us as much as I can. I’d suggest visiting where she was found, but it’ll still be monitored by the police, and I don’t want them thinking any of us is the killer revisiting his fucking scene.”
Good point. “I need to find Has and apologise. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking before, but of course it wasn’t him. I’m sorry for being an ass.”
Reacher snorted. “Not sure I noticed any difference, brother. I need to go and update Ally. As the Pres’s old lady, she’ll be expected to support us through this. Ice, bring Lissa in, because she might be needed. After this, we’re gonna do what we can to find the assholes who hurt Has too. Nobody gets away with hurting my fucking club, and I don’t care if it happened before they joined. Got it?”
Ice stood up, tucking his tablet under his arm.
“I’ve also removed three more porn videos this morning, but I’m not telling him. He’s got enough to worry about right now. I’m close to finding the fucker though. The latest IP address led to some new information, so even moving around to try and avoid detection isn’t gonna work for much longer.”
Jesus. Poor guy, he was already still being plastered all over the internet, and now he was being falsely accused of something he’d never be able to do.
“I’ll go and look for him. I feel like such an asshole.”
“Good.”
Ice didn’t stick around for my response to his comment. They’d been enemies for so long, but lately they seemed to have finally buried the hatchet, maybe just since Ice had cleaned up his act. I’d missed so many things while I was away.
Reacher lingered after Ice left.
“Thanks, brother.”
“For what? Being a complete dick, and upsetting one of the most decent club members we have? You should probably punch me instead.”
He laughed. “If it’ll make you feel better, sure. I meant for pushing the old lady revote. Ally… she’s so fucking happy. I didn’t realise how much it was hurting her, you know, to be kept from that title. To be kept from being my fucking other half in the club. So yeah, thanks.”
“We need to speak to Micro and Jock though. If they have a problem, we need to do something to clear the air.”
“I’m with you on Micro, for sure. Jock… I was gonna come see you today about him anyway. He’s leaving us, brother. He came to see me after Church yesterday.”
“What? Is he okay?”
Reacher nodded, standing up and gathering up the used mugs from the table.
“He’s moving to the coast, to be closer to his daughter. Says he’s done with the life, and I can get that. He feels like there’s nothing left here for him now. Everywhere he looks, he sees Jess, you know? She was such a part of his club life.”
“Yeah, of course I can understand that. We all miss her, right? I can’t even imagine, especially not now I have Camille.”
Reacher washed the mugs and set them on the side.
“I know, man. We’ll have to give him a good send off. End of a fucking era, though. He was the last of the old club.”
Yeah, end of an era alright.
“He’s gonna be missed.”
We both prepared to leave the room together, with my focus being on finding Has-Been and making up for my behaviour earlier. Reacher was a few paces ahead of me, when I ran back for my phone.
After I’d found my phone, hurrying back out and closing the door, I turned and saw Reacher and Elise standing a few paces away, whispering to each other.
“There you are, sweets. Wow, you must have driven way too fast to get back here so soon.”
She looked confused as she looked past Reacher at me. He hissed something else, and strode away, while she watched him leave.
“What… you’re wearing the same clothes as last night, Elise. You didn’t fucking go home at all, did you?”
Cammy
I stepped right back into it, didn’t I? Ice’s room was the other end of the hall, but I caught Stitch’s question, because he practically yelled it at his sister.
She folded her arms and glared at him.
“So what if I didn’t?”
“Jesus, who the fuck is it? Which one of these fuckers has been creeping around you? I’ll fucking kill him.”
Elise let out a frustrated screech, and shoved Stitch back a step.
“It’s none of your business, Seth! You can’t keep doing this! I’m a grown woman, and I’m allowed to have a life. You can’t dictate what I can and can’t do. And you can’t choose who I love! It’s my decision.”
I stepped between them, before he could snap back at her.
“Okay, let’s calm this down. Stitch, go and do whatever you were doing. I’ll get Elise a lovely cuppa and make sure she’s okay.”
“Of course I’m okay. Why does everyone assume I don’t know my own mind? I’m not an idiot. I’m not some na?ve child! I’m… I’m going home. For the record, though, Seth, I slept in a spare room. I got tired as the party dragged on, and I found the nearest room with a damn chair in it, and slept there.”
Stitch opened his mouth again, and I elbowed him in the chest.
“No, Stitch.” I ignored his glare and turned to Elise again.
“Elise, are you sure you don’t want that cuppa before you go?”
She shook her head. “I only wish I didn’t sleep alone, but you’ve succeeded in making everyone in this place too scared to even fucking talk to me, so thanks for that. It’s just another place where I don’t belong, and I don’t fit in.” She turned and headed back down the hall, towards the stairs.
“You have to stop being so overbearing, Stitch. She’s hurting, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s because she’s fallen for someone who won’t even give her a chance. Because. Of. You.”
Honestly, he looked like he’d been punched.
“I’ve never wanted this for her. I can’t help being ‘overbearing’ as you put it. She’s got plans, babe, and none of them include being a biker’s old lady, and languishing here in this dive.”
Oh wow. “Thanks. You couldn’t have made that any clearer, huh? Languishing here in this dive is good enough for me, and Lissa, and the other perfectly capable, strong, fucking intelligent women, but somehow not for your sister. You know, I thought your head lived up your ass just because of what you were going through when we met, but now I’m starting to wonder if that’s just who you are.”
I dodged his attempts to catch my arm, and walked away from him, taking the same route as Elise, and heading down the stairs. When I reached the door to the outside, I almost ran into Elise, who was loitering there, looking as frustrated as I felt.
“I’m not going back up there,” she hissed instantly.
“Neither am I. I’m going home, screw all of them.” I stared at her for a moment. “You wanna come with?”
She nodded, casting a longing glance back across the car park, where I could see Has-Been and Ryder talking or arguing. It was hard to tell from here, but I knew them well enough to recognise them on sight now.
“He’s had a bit of a shock this morning, babe. He’ll need a bit of time.”
I unlocked my car, and gestured at Elise to get in, as I slid into the driving seat. It felt strange to be back in my car, and without Stitch by my side. My husband. My god. I was married and I’d just walked away from him without even discussing things properly.
“Are we going? I don’t really want Seth finding us out here. I’m too mad at him right now.”
I started the car, and headed for the gate.
“Yeah, he needs to cool down a bit.”
“Did he upset you too?”
Did he? I wasn’t dumb enough to think he actually meant to insult me when he said that, but he needed time to think about everything.
The prospects at the gate greeted us by name, and waved us off cheerily.
“Can you imagine being prospects?” Elise asked me, as she waved to one of them.
“You know they’re basically treated like slaves until they’re patched in. Assuming that the vote approves them being patched at all. It’s really a cruel way to treat people they’ll later declare as their brothers, and treat like family.”
I was realising that club life was a hell of a lot different than I’d realised. I was surprised to realise that I actually liked most of it though. Apart from murder. That part was scary.
“Did you know Chrissy?”