Chapter 29 #2
She gave a half-shrug. “I guess. Curious. When it comes to families, I didn’t exactly have the ‘normal’ experience.
Sometimes, when I hear other kids talk about their families, I can’t help myself.
I listened to Cassidy, and I kept thinking that it must be nice to have divorced parents instead of two dead parents who you never even got to see in the same room. God, that is awful. I’m really awful.”
She clamped a hand over her eyes. From the flush in her cheeks, Josie could tell she was upset, maybe close to tears.
Slowly, Josie took her wrist and pulled it away from her face.
Sure enough, her blue eyes were glassy. “Do you really think it’s awful to wish that your parents were both still alive and divorced instead of gone?
To wish that you knew what it was like to have them both there, both physically present at the same time? ”
Wren blinked. “Um, no?”
Josie released her wrist and held her hand instead, relieved when Wren didn’t pull away.
With a quick glance in Noah’s direction for moral support, she took a deep breath and spoke.
“You know the basics of how I grew up. Noah had the exact opposite. Two loving parents, siblings, family vacations, Christmas traditions.” Wren didn’t need to know just how spectacularly all of that had fallen apart once Noah turned eighteen.
Looking over at him, Josie asked, “Didn’t your mom make you all wear matching Christmas pajamas and take photos every year? ”
“This is not about me.”
Wren smirked a little and Josie was flooded with gratitude that they might be getting somewhere. “I’ve always been jealous of him,” she admitted. “Always.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“For what it’s worth,” said Noah, “we both wish your parents were still here, too, married, divorced, or in any other scenario. Not because we don’t want you here because we absolutely do. Just because we want you to be happy.”
“Thanks.” Wren’s palm grew moist against Josie’s, but she still didn’t pull away. “It’s just weird, you know? Having no real idea what a family, even a divorced one, is like. So yeah, I listen to conversations I probably shouldn’t.”
“That’s okay,” Noah assured her. “In this case, it’s a good thing. So Cassidy didn’t want to report this guy because she didn’t want to cause issues with her parents, is that right?”
Wren nodded.
Josie had no frame of reference for what the dynamics of a family were like post-divorce or post-separation.
She hadn’t had a normal or stable childhood.
Still, she wondered more and more if the strain on Cassidy’s relationship with Turner had as much to do with Dani’s unwitting influence as it did with Turner’s past sins or work obligations.
Regardless, the thought that this entire chain of events might have been prevented if Cassidy had felt comfortable enough to talk to either of her parents about the man she saw “hanging around” was a gut punch.
“Did Cassidy say anything else about this guy?” Josie asked. “Give a description? A vehicle of some kind?”
“She said, ‘some old white guy in a baseball cap.’ That’s it. Well, that’s all I heard. She might have told her friend more. I only overheard a little of their conversation. I didn’t hear her say anything after that in class, and then school was over.”
“Do you know her friend’s name?” Noah said.
“Only her first name.” Wren grimaced. “Toni. Sorry.”
“Don’t be,” Josie told her. “We can find her through Cassidy’s social media or the school. You’ve told us a lot. This is really helpful.”
“It is?”
Noah nodded. “Definitely. I’m really glad you told us all this stuff. Thank you.”
Josie gave Wren’s hand a squeeze and let go. Then she bumped her shoulder against Wren’s. “Yes, thank you.”
A long, quiet moment passed. To Josie’s surprise, it didn’t feel awkward. No. It felt right. The three of them as a unit. Wren finally getting comfortable enough to discuss serious things with them. Maybe they were forming a bond. Maybe it was just wishful thinking.
“So,” Wren said. “Um, do you guys think Cassidy is dead?”
Neither Josie nor Noah answered right away.
Just when they thought they were getting a handle on the whole guardianship thing, some new challenge popped up.
Even small ones felt big and fraught with the possibility of failure.
The sheer volume of difficult questions they never imagined having to answer as parents—or guardians—was astounding.
How did parents do this? Did they really just wing it?
How did they know the right thing to say?
Wren was fourteen. Lying to her wasn’t an option.
She’d see right through it. Telling her that according to their experience and the statistics in these types of cases, the probability that Cassidy was dead was very high was also not an option.
Josie didn’t want to scare the hell out of her.
But, as Wren had made clear at the outset of this conversation, she was already well aware of the types of crimes that happened in the world.
Before Josie could formulate an answer, Noah spoke, his voice calm in the way that had soothed Josie for years now.
“Wren, you don’t need us to tell you that there is a possibility Cassidy has been killed.
You’re smart enough and mature enough to figure that out on your own.
It’s a terrifying thought. Devastating. It can make you anxious.
Keep you up at night. You wouldn’t be human if it didn’t.
For me and Josie? As far as we’re concerned, until the evidence proves otherwise, Cassidy is alive and it is critical that we find her—and her mother—as soon as possible.
That’s where we direct all of our mental energy. ”
“Have you ever found a girl? Like, alive?”
“Yes,” Josie said. “We have.”
“Oh. That’s good then, right?”
“That’s always the outcome we hope for,” Noah said.