16. Luca
Chapter 16
Luca
M uffled noises slipped from Irina before she whispered, “It. . . it hurts.”
“I know, sweetheart.” I held her close as I took the steps two at a time. She felt right in my arms, as if this was exactly where she belonged. “I’m going to take care of you,” I said, staring down at her.
Her eyelids fluttered before she set her gaze on me, brows scrunching in vulnerability. “I know.”
Emotion surged in my bloodstream from the softness of her tone, and it was a complete contrast to how she usually acted toward me.
Rain pattered against the arched window of my room as I laid her down onto my bed and turned on the side lamp.
I clenched and unclenched my fists to rein in my anger before I completely lost it. She’d been reckless tonight and could’ve gotten herself killed .
She swallowed, eyes roaming my face. “You’re angry.”
I lifted her gently by the waist and used my free hand to remove her jacket—my jacket.
“I am.”
She was so close I could hear every harsh intake of her breath when I touched her.
I reached for the hem of her wet shirt and attempted to lift it when she held my wrist.
Our eyes locked, and I stilled my movements. “But that doesn’t mean I’m going to hurt you,” I assured her, feeling my pulse pound in my ears from having her here with me.
She let go with a sigh and I removed her top, ignoring her nakedness. Her jeans were next—where I found the dagger she once held at my throat—until she was only in her bra and underwear.
“Give me a minute.” I headed into the bathroom, grabbing the supplies I needed to clean her injuries.
I didn’t know what the hell got into her tonight, but it left me even more confused on where we stood. One second, she was staring at me with imploring eyes, as if she didn’t hate me, and the next she was running out of the museum in fear—an expression I’d never seen on her before.
Irina was staring out the window when I reentered and I stopped in my tracks, watching the shadows of rain droplets dance across her skin.
She appeared so unlike herself in this moment that a fierce longing rooted deep inside me, and I knew that I’d protect this woman even if it meant I had to die in the process .
“I’m not supposed to be here,” she said, still gazing at the rainfall.
I walked toward the bed and kneeled in front of her. “I think. . . you’re exactly where you need to be.”
Opening the first aid kit, I grabbed a cotton swab and soaked it with water before bringing it toward her cut lip.
I could feel the heat of her stare as I cleaned the blood there before grabbing another and doing the same to her cheek and the gashes across her arms and legs.
I finished applying the ointment to her cuts before wrapping them. “They should heal fast with no scarring.”
“Take this.” She was quiet as I handed her a pill with a glass of water. “It’ll help with the body aches.”
I set everything on the side table before grabbing a shirt from the drawer.
I cautiously put it over her head and helped her arms through it. She was compliant, and it was off-putting to see her be this docile.
I went down on my haunches, resting my elbows on my knees. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again, Irina.”
Her silence flared my temper as her eyes turned a deep shade of blue, emotion glossing over them.
“What the fuck were you thinking?” My tone was harsher than intended, but this push and pull between us was maddening.
When I thought she wouldn’t answer me, she surprised me by lifting her hand in the space between us.
I stilled, tracking her movement before catching her gaze. Her face was drawn, trepidation flickering across her features. Then she reached toward me hesitantly, caressing my cheek with the tip of her fingers .
“That I wanted to be selfish.”
I cupped her hand, flattening her palm against my skin, savoring the gentleness of her touch. “Then be selfish.”
Her thumb swiped back and forth, soothing the dark depths of my soul.
Thick tension spiked in the air surrounding us as we stayed like this, our eyes locked with intensity.
It was the worst type of torture wanting something you couldn’t have.
Her hand slipped from mine, breaking the trance. “I’m not like you.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t chase dead ends!” Her face hardened as she glowered at me. Long gone was the warmth I saw in her moments ago. “I don’t want you, okay? So just stop . Stop cornering me. Stop this fixation you have for me. Stop pretending you care. Just stop. It’s. . . it’s embarrassing.”
I narrowed my eyes at her, noticing the slight trembling of her chin, and I couldn’t help but laugh humorlessly. “Are you finished?”
If she thought her ill intended words were enough to get me to leave her alone, she was in for a surprise.
Grabbing the covers, I put it over her, confusion washing over her features. She opened her mouth, and I could feel the impending vice of her viperous tongue.
“Don’t continue giving me more of your empty words, Irina,” I warned. “Shut up and go to sleep.”
“You know I can’t stay here. If Roman finds out-”
“If he finds out what ? Weren’t you the one who threatened to tell him about us?” I hovered above her, my hands resting on either side of her head. “What happened, piccola ribelle? Are you all bark and no bite?”
“There’s no us .”
I wrapped my hand around her throat. “No one can stop me from having you, Irina. Not even you.”
Her pulse beat beneath my thumb as I leaned down until we were mere inches apart. “Not even you,” I whispered before placing a kiss at the corner of her mouth—right where the cut was—and pulled back, watching the blue in her eyes darken.
Unsaid words danced in every breath she took, and I intended to steal each one until we were interlinked. Until she couldn’t erase me from herself.
I stood up and walked to the other side of the bed before sitting down, my back to her.
The silence settled heavily around us, and I knew she was wary of sleeping in unknown territory. It was evident that she was always on edge with how she carried a knife everywhere she went.
“You’re safe with me.”
I waited for movement or a retort but when I turned my head, Irina’s eyes were closed, exhaustion lining her face.
My lips twitched at the sight of her snoozing form.
She could lie to herself, lie to me , but her body betrayed her. She trusted me.
I didn’t know how much time had passed as I watched her sleep before the first incoherent sound slipped from her lips .
Leaning up, I moved forward, her face twisting as if she were in pain.
She thrashed against the bed; her head tipped up as she whimpered.
I kneeled beside her and touched her face, her skin ice cold.
“ Irina .”
Her body convulsed; her mouth shut as her face slowly turned into a sickening blue.
Fuck. She was choking.
I grasped her jaw, forcing it open and pushing two fingers to the back of her throat. “Come on, sweetheart. Breathe.”
Her throat was tight, and she kept sputtering, choking on nothing.
That same helpless panic arose in me, my body tense as her lips lost color.
With my free hand, I squeezed her throat and stuck my fingers further down her throat. “Come on, Irina.”
It felt like a damned eternity before her eyes shot open and she gasped.
Relief flooded my system instantly, and I picked her up, wrapping my arms around her.
She coughed against me, clutching my back as if anchoring herself. “Luca?”
“I’m here.” I rubbed her back. “I’m here.”
She buried her face in the crook of my neck, inhaling deeply as her body trembled.
“How often does this happen?”
She pressed further into me, the beat of her heart clashing against my own .
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Her head shook, and I clenched my teeth.
“I’m holding onto scraps here, Irina.”
She leaned back and faced me, her eyes searching mine in dread. “I’m tired, Luca.” Her voice wavered. “Can you. . . can you just hold me? Only for tonight. Please.”
A disturbing feeling settled in the pit of my stomach.
There was a rawness to her words that put me on high alert. And as I held her in my arms, my mind raced with the possibility that her nightmare wasn’t a figment of her imagination, but her reality.
I recalled the night she’d shot that woman in front of me. It had left me curious more than anything how she was capable of killing someone in cold blood. Not that I was any different but with Irina, it only made questions arise.
And I knew there wasn’t an ounce of good conscience in me because I should’ve told Roman that his wife’s best friend might be a psychopath, but I kept my mouth shut.
For some fucked up reason, I wanted to unravel Irina’s secrets and keep them for myself.
Pieces started to come together, yet the puzzle was distorted and the only way I could figure it out was if Irina fully trusted me.
I nudged under her chin lazily as I said, “You never have to say please, piccola ribelle.”
Grabbing her by the waist, I laid us down on the bed. Her amber scent calmed my staggered thoughts as I enveloped her in my embrace.
She clung to me; our bodies entwined beneath the covers, and I could feel warmth seep into her skin again .
“Thank you,” she said against my chest, her breathing evening out before she dozed off to sleep.
This time, there was no nightmare.