Chapter Thirty-Four
Stone ~ Three Months Later
The sounds of sawing and hammering, and the voices of men shouting their banter at each other as they worked, surrounded me, making me grin.
The heat from the sun’s rays touched my bare back as I hammered nails into our new roof, and I gloried in its warmth.
Sunshine, good brothers, and working until I dropped seemed to be doing their part in healing me after my meltdown and subsequent road trip. I’d been back three months and had thrown myself back into club life, well… or at least new club life.
We had two clubhouses now. The one we called the old timers or OT, was Dad’s camp. The warehouse where we worked, ate, and slept was HQ two-point-oh, or HQ for short. The place was coming along well. We’d put up all the drywall inside and got a shit ton of bedrooms mapped out over the ground and first floors. We had a vast, modern kitchen that Iris loved. More bedrooms, offices, and our new Church were built off a warren of corridors leading from the bar and rec room at the front of the place. We had a gym in the basement, along with a room where we could store weapons and cash and conduct beatdowns. And we’d even managed to convert space outside, too.
One of the massive storage buildings was now a ten-car auto shop, all with ramps and the latest equipment. We’d kitted out a garage where we could store our bikes in winter, and we’d even converted another storage unit into a house for the whores to live in.
Club life was good.
My personal life was still gut-wrenching, but it was slightly less gut-wrenching than before.
Nobody had seen Elise for months. A rumor went around that she’d gone away again, but I didn’t know for sure. One thing I did know was that she hadn’t been to see me once. Not a visit, call, or letter.
Nothing.
Abe kept saying something wasn’t right, and he had a gut feeling things weren’t as they seemed, but I couldn’t hold stock in that. The fact was, even now, she could’ve come to me if she was in trouble, and deep down, she knew it. I wasn’t a man who would ever abandon her, but I also wasn’t a man who’d beg, pester, and make a nuisance of myself.
If she wanted Henderson, I had to let her have him, whatever the circumstances. It cut deep, still, but what else could I do? I couldn’t hold on to a woman who didn’t want to hold on to me.
Instead, I threw myself into building something. I wished she was by my side, building it with me, like we’d always planned, but it wasn’t meant to be. God’s plan for me didn’t include her, and it destroyed me to have to face it, but my faith had gone, so it was easy to give up the fight.
I just wanted to do my best, exist, give something back, and leave the Earth a better place than I found it. The family I wanted was wrapped up in Elise Bell nee Henderson, but she had her own now, and it didn’t include me.
Maybe one day I’d meet a woman who loved me enough to understand there was only so much I could give, but I didn’t think it was fair to go looking, especially when I couldn’t love them the way they deserved.
So, I decided to keep on keeping on and, like Adele Whitlock said, find beauty wherever I could. I’d often thought about her over the months—probably more than I should’ve—and always with a smile. I’d gotten over what happened and stopped regretting it.
Like she said, it was a beautiful moment in time, and it didn’t need to be anything more or less than it was. Wise words, indeed.
The main doors to the clubhouse opened, and Iris walked through, carrying a wide tray and holding beers and plates piled high with sandwiches. Abe appeared, holding the door open for her.
“Lunch break, boys,” she called out. “Put your power tools down.”
Laughter rang out, a few of the men bantering about their ‘power tools.’
I shook my head, lips twitching at the schoolboy ridiculousness of it all while I descended the ladder from the roof.
Abe looked up. “How’s it goin’ up there?”
“As well as securing an iron roof can go,” I told him. “It’s well insulated, so it should keep the heat out and the warm in, depending on the time of year.” I sat on one of the folding chairs around a plastic picnic table we used for lunch hours and picked up a sandwich. “What time are the phone lines being installed?”
He checked his watch. “Phone company should be here by one. The guys said they had a repair job, then they’d be straight over. The computers are coming today, too.” He rubbed his hands together gleefully. “Can’t wait to have a go on those beauties.”
“Stick to your Atari, Abe,” a voice called out. “They’re more your speed.”
A grin stole across my face as I turned toward my Marine bud Duggan, now known as Tex. He’d survived the bomb blast that day but had been left for dead. Luckily, he’d been found in time and survived, but he had a permanent limp and was sensitive to light. He’d turned up at the club just after I got back from my road trip, asking for a place. The man had mad skills in the ring, could wrangle a horse—which he swapped for a Harley—and kept everyone laughing, so he was a welcome addition to HQ two point oh.
“Come grab a beer and some food, brother,” I called over. “That wall can wait, but the food won’t.”
Tex sauntered over, pulling his tee back on as he approached, grumbling, “Hotter than Hades here, Stone,”
“You’re from fuckin’ Texas,” Abe pointed out. “Nowhere hotter than there.”
“Different heat,” Tex declared, grabbing a sandwich and taking a big bite.
“How the fuck can heat be different?” Abe demanded. “Heat’s heat. If it’s ninety degrees, it’s ninety degrees.”
“Humidity makes you sweat more,” Tex explained through his chews.
“Right,” Abe muttered. “Every fucker sweats in ninety-degree heat.”
Tex’s stare slid to me. “Remember the Devil’s Armpit, Stone? Never known sweat like it.”
I almost balked at the memory. “It was the ripest place I’ve ever known.”
Tex barked a laugh. “Good times.”
I deadpanned.
“Who’s that?” Abe murmured, looking toward the main road.
Stretching my neck, I peered at the blue Cavalier, trundling down the road. It slowed to a crawl before taking the turn into the parking lot at a snail’s pace.
“Who the fuck drives that slow?” Tex muttered. “Anybody expectin’ their grandma?”
“Hope not,” Abe muttered dryly. “She’s been dead for twenty years.”
“Abe!” Iris slapped his chest.
I busted out laughing, turning back toward the Cavalier as it ground to a halt.
The sun shone from behind, lighting up a female silhouette, and then the door flew open, and a pair of shapely legs appeared in shorts and sneakers. “Hi!” a familiar Stevie Nicks-like husky voice called out.
I nearly dropped my sandwich.
Fuck me.
“Hi, John!” Adele sang.
I scrambled to my feet, and my eyebrows hit my hairline. “Adele! What are you doin’ here?”
“Oh, sheeeit.” Abe whistled under his breath.
“Yo! Miss Daisy,” Tex called over. “Where’s Hoke?”
Confusion washed over her features, and she looked back at her car. Then her expression became animated as his meaning dawned on her, and she threw her head back and laughed. “Good one.” She swanned over, all curvy hips and legs and pretty smile. “I’m Adele,” she announced, thrusting her hand out at KC, whose head reared back. “I like your hair!”
KC ran a hand through his long, stringy salt-and-pepper do.
Adele cocked her head to one side. “Ever thought about getting a keratin treatment? It would make those locks soft as a baby’s butt.”
Iris giggled.
Abe looked at me, eyes rounding. “She’s a nut.”
My lips twitched. “Yep.”
Her eyes caught mine, and she waved enthusiastically before sweeping a hand down her body. “Hey! Look what the cat dragged in.”
“Yep, a nut.” Abe grinned. “I like her.”
I smirked. Adele hadn’t changed a bit. Still cute and still funny. Seeing her again brought a smile to my face, but why was she here?
I walked over and kissed her cheek, “Hey, sweetheart. It’s good to see ya, but we’re a long way from New Mexico. You okay?”
She beamed up at me, her blue eyes twinkling in the sun. “I’m good. I recalled you talking about Hambleton and the Speed Demons. It didn’t take much brainpower to track you down. I went to the other Speed Demons’ place, and they told me you were here. Can we talk somewhere privately?”
My forehead creased questioningly. “Yeah, sweetheart.”
She held a finger up. “Won’t be a jiffy.” Turning, she headed back to her car and pulled out a black overnight bag before strutting back over. “Lead the way.”
“You gonna hang here?” I asked, jerking my chin toward the bag.
She cocked her head, her fantastic black hair spilling over her shoulder. “Who knows? I’ve got my case in the trunk, just in case.”
“If your case is in the trunk, what’s in the bag?” I inquired confusedly.
She rolled her eyes. “You’ll see.”
My hand went to the small of her back, and I guided her into the clubhouse and through the bar.
“Place looks great, John,” she murmured, eyes wide as she took everything in. “It’s good to see you’re doing everything you planned.”
A recollection of our night, chatting away in the diner, came back to me. I’d told her about the club and my plans, and she was right. The place did look good.
“We’ll go to my office,” I suggested, leading her down one of the corridors. “We can have some privacy there.”
Adele glanced in my direction and smiled. “It’s good to see you, John.”
I grinned back at her. “You too, Dell.”
Pushing my office door open, I gestured for her to take a seat before grabbing another chair and placing it next to her. I parked my ass and watched as she folded her hands in her lap and took a breath. “Right. I’m gonna get straight to the point. I’m here to tell you something.”
“Okaaay?” I said as a question.
She leaned over, unzipped the bag, and shook the contents out over my desk. A collection of little white plastic sticks and wands clattered onto the wood; there must’ve been thirty, at least.
Then, the bottom fell out of my world.
“I’m pregnant, and it’s yours,” she announced. “You’re the only man I’ve had sexual relations with since my high school boyfriend two years ago. I get if you want to do a paternity test, though until the baby comes, I’m not sure what that would entail, but I wouldn’t lie to you. I’m not here to trap you or make any demands. If you say you’re not interested, I’ll wish you well and walk away. You never have to see me again. But you’re the father, and you have every right to know. So, here I am.” She smiled sheepishly and did jazz hands. “Surprise!”
My mouth fell open, closely followed by my asshole. Lost for words, I turned to the table and grabbed a handful of tests, examining them one by one.
I tried to tap into my feelings and tamp down my rising panic, but there was none. My chest felt a little tight and my heart ached because I always thought it would be Elise sitting before me, telling me this.
I hardly knew this girl, but I couldn’t bring myself to hate the idea of havin’ a baby. I always dreamed of bein’ a dad, but after Elise, my dream faded. The situation was fucked up, but a baby?
Jesus fucking Christ.
“Without wanting to ruin the moment, my pee is on them,” she admitted, nodding to my hands.
“Babe.” I cocked an eyebrow. “Had my dick up and my mouth on your pussy. It’s a moot point.”
She giggled. “I guess.”
My eyes went to her stomach. It was softly rounded, but then it was that night, too. “How are you feeling?”
“Okay now,” she murmured, hand going to her belly. “I’ve had bad sickness in the mornings, but it passed a few days ago, so I thought it was time to drive up and see you. Thank you for asking, though.”
“You seen a doctor?” I asked.
“Yes. It all looks good, but I need to arrange my first sonogram appointment. I wanted to speak to you first, to gauge your reaction. It’s been awkward because I didn’t want you to miss anything, but I also didn’t know if you even wanted to be involved.”
“So, you’re gonna have the baby?” I inquired softly.
“Yeah. The other option’s fine for some, but not for me.”
My head fell back, and I looked up to the heavens, calling for divine intervention. It was that moment when it all hit me square in the chest.
I was going to be a dad.
A lump formed in my throat, and I dropped my head at the same time as my hand raised to rub my temple. “I’m sorry,” I rasped. “I used a condom.”
“John,” she whispered. “I was on the pill too. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t take it prolifically because I wasn’t sexually active, but we should’ve still been protected.” She grinned. “You must have pertinacious swimmers.”
I couldn’t stop a chuckle from tearing from my throat. “That today’s word?”
“Yes,” she said, eyes sparkling excitedly. “Isn’t it splendiferous?”
My lips hitched. “You’re a nut.”
Her face scrunched up prettily. “You may have mentioned it once or twice.”
And cute, my inner voice added.
A feeling of resignation washed over me because I knew what I had to do. It wasn’t about Elise or even Adele. It was about me, my honor, and the fact I had to look at myself in the mirror every morning and sleep easy every night. It was about Mom and the man she raised to do the right thing and about club and legacy.
But still, out of all of those things, it was mainly about my kid and being a father to him or her.
With a heavy heart, I leaned forward, took Adele’s hand in mine, and spoke honestly.
“Don’t got much to offer, Dell. I’m a Marine veteran biker who can’t give you hearts and roses. But I’m a stand-up guy, and I’ll look after and protect you. I think I could love you, and you love me, but you have to know, I’ll never fall in love with you, so you gotta guard your heart against falling in love with me. However, I can give you both a good life if you let me. Will you marry me, Adele Whitlock? Will you build a home and a family with me?”
What was left of my soul wept deep inside. My chest contracted with its pain and its despair.
Tears sprang to her eyes. “John,’ she whispered. “I know you’ve loved and lost your one. But I haven’t met mine yet. What if I do? What if I meet him, but I’m married to you?”
“Then I’ll let you go,” I promised. “I’ll never hold you back. That’s my vow to you.”
“Are you sure you want to do this?” she demanded gently.
“I’m sure I want my kid to have my name and my legacy,” I explained. “So, yeah.”
She leveled me with her gaze, studying me for what seemed like an eternity. Her eyes searched mine, much the same way they did that night back in the diner when I asked her to spend the night with me.
Again, she must’ve found what she was looking for because she smiled and gave me one solitary nod.
“Then, I accept.”
Two weeks later, we were married by the Justice of the Peace in Laramie.
As I said, ‘I do,’ a lump formed in my throat that stayed there, hard as a rock, until six months later when my son was born.
Looking down into his eyes, blue but with a gold ring already forming around the edges, I swore I’d love my boy forever. See, I may have lost Elise, but I gained Xander, then later, Gage, and Kit. Love had many forms, and my kids were the purest ones. A few years later, God also blessed us with a daughter, Freya, my princess, and from the second she was born, a fire sparked to life inside my belly.
I remember holding my girl safe in my arms and walking her outside in the warm evening. It was a whole different love than I had for the boys. The protectiveness I hadn’t felt for anybody since Elise roared to life, and a soft voice I still dreamed of floated through my mind.
What decent woman would want to be a part of that hellhole? What decent woman would step foot inside those gates? What decent woman would raise a child, a daughter, amongst those demons?I wouldn’t let my dog live there, let alone a daughter. The only honorable person left is Iris and mark my words. It won’t take long for them to chew her up and spit her out.
My blood ran cold, ice filling my veins. I wasn’t a fearful man, but at that moment, I was terrified because years before, Elise’s prediction had come true.
Terrible, evil, demonic shit had gone down. Dad eventually gave up the gavel, and I became prez, but with that piece of carved, smooth wood came grave danger.
Years before, something life-destroying happened to the heartbeat of our club, back when Adele was pregnant with my middle boy, Gage.
And just like Elise said, Iris got chewed up and spat out until she was never the same again.
I needed to protect my Freya from the same, and I vowed I’d shield her from my lifestyle, even if it meant one day sending her away.
My baby girl would be clean and decent.
My baby girl would be more.