Chapter 1
Aurora
”Baby, I”m so sorry. I promise to make it up to you this weekend,” Gabriel said again and added, ”I love you, Aurora, so very much.”
It was a pity I love you. Another apology. I heard them a lot lately.
”I know, and it”s okay. I understand.”
I heard his daughter call out to him, and he hurriedly hung up. This was the third date in one month that Gabriel had had to cancel at the last minute because Sophia, his thirteen-year-old daughter, had a crisis.
”Wow, look at you. Gabe is going to swallow his tongue,” my colleague and friend Luna said as she walked into my office.
Since my last meeting ran late, I”d brought a change of clothes to the office. The cream raw silk dress I knew worked well with my café latte complexion. As a family that was mixed-race in more ways than one—we had African, South American, Irish, French, and even Middle Eastern mixed in. People always wondered where I came from. I told them I was born and raised right here in Savannah.
My father was half African and half French, born and raised in Martinique before he”d moved to the United States. My mother was half Brazilian, a quarter Irish, and a quarter Lebanese. My parents were not together and hadn”t been since I was eight, which was why I appreciated how much Gabriel loved his daughter and put her first. My father had not. He”d made a new family and forgotten his first. My mother had dragged me around until finally, at the age of fourteen, I”d had to find a way out to survive and stayed with my aunt in Savannah. The only reason she took me in was because she needed help.
When she passed, it had hammered home to me that I was alone. Even though she wasn”t a loving and caring adult in my life, she”d at least been in my life.
I”d grown up without attention, so when I finally got it from Gabriel, I”d been swept away by his charm, his elegance, and his kindness. He had a big heart. He laughed openly and loud. He was also a true Southern Gentleman, except in bed, where he was by far the best lover I”d ever had.
”He canceled,” I sighed, sitting down. ”So, he won”t be swallowing his tongue.”
”Not his daughter again,” Luna complained. ”You know that little brat is trying to break you guys up.”
”No, she”s not. She”s thirteen, and Gabriel has set his life up, so even though he and Iris share custody because they live next to one another, Sophia has both her parents always.”
”And you don”t mind that his ex-wife is at his place all the time? Or he”s over her place?”
”They”re friends, Luna. I wish more divorces were this friendly; it would be better for the children.”
Gabriel Rhodes had built two homes after he and his wife, Iris, divorced. They were next to one another and connected through the gardens and pool area. He”d told me privacy wasn”t an issue, but it was. Iris had walked in on us making out on the kitchen counter once because she was running low on cream. I”d been mortified.
Iris had made a fuss about Sophia seeing us having sex. Since then, we kept our sexual activities in his bedroom after we locked the door. Which was why I asked him to come over to my place the weeks he didn”t officially have his daughter. My house was a condo and not the opulent home of an old-money Rhodes fortune heir—but at least no exes or impressionable daughters were lurking around.
Speaking of daughters and despite my efforts to make it work with Sophia, the fact was that she didn”t like me. As soon as Gabriel”s back was turned, Sophia turned mean. I”d asked Gabriel if there was any chance of reconciliation between him and his ex, and he”d assured me it was dead and buried. But I didn”t think his daughter or ex-wife had gotten that memo. I couldn”t tell him that his setup with his ex was a significant problem for me because his devotion to his daughter was one of the things I loved and admired about him.
”I love you, Aurora, but you”re kidding yourself, honey.” Luna looked at me with concern mixed in with pity, the emotion I hated most. ”This isn”t working for you.”
I was twenty-nine years old, and I wanted to get married and have children. When I met Gabriel, who was thirteen years my senior, I thought it would be something short-term. But a year had gone by, and we were a couple. He had become my best friend, and I knew I was his.
”I love him,” I said bleakly.
”Love isn”t supposed to hurt you like this.” Luna rubbed my shoulder and leaned to kiss my cheek. ”You have to talk to him, tell him how you feel.”
”I”ll lose him, Luna.”
”If you can lose him so easily, do you really have him?”
I closed my eyes. ”Is it pathetic that I want whatever I can get with him?”
”No, sweetheart. But relationships are give and take. No matter what decision you make, I”m with you all the way.”
I started working at Savannah Lace Architects Designers three years ago. Luna had been my colleague first and now boss. We”d become close friends. We were opposites. While I was an introvert, she was an extrovert. I wore a lot of sheath dresses with high heels, while she wore a lot of jeans with boots. She stood out in a crowd, while I blended into the wallpaper. She dated a lot. I had been in two long-term relationships in my life. I wanted to be her when I grew up. She was an attractive woman, definitely, but what was arresting about her was her confidence. She was a fantastic architect as well and a friend who cared about me. She didn”t judge, which I loved, but she was also honest about how she felt. I hadn”t had a lot of friends growing up since we moved so much, and by the time I settled in Savannah as a teenager, I”d become used to my company. No one would call me mousy, but they would say I was quiet. They”d say I was a peacemaker but not a pushover. I was a softie with a spine of steel. Except, apparently, when it came to the man I”d fallen in love with. My spine seemed to have melted.
I decided to put in a couple of hours of work on a design that I was developing for a new hotel project on Tybee Island and eating one of those salads, Nina Davenport, the CEO and President of Savannah Lace Architects Designers, always kept in the fridge.
My phone buzzed, and I smiled when I saw it was Gabriel.
Gabriel: Baby, I miss you. I”m so sorry about tonight.
It was our first anniversary, and he”d booked a romantic dinner at Circa 1875, an exclusive restaurant. We were going to my place after, and I”d even taken the following day off so we could sleep in and have a lazy breakfast.
Me: It”s okay, honey. Take care of Sophia.
Gabriel: You want to come over here tonight?
He was trying, I knew. But the last time Sophia had had some crisis, and I”d gone to his place, I”d spent the night alone in his bed while Gabriel had been at his ex”s house. He”d fallen asleep on Iris”s couch, he”d told me when he came back early in the morning and immediately packed to leave for a Rhodes Hotel opening in New York. The walk of shame was a hundred times worse when you”d slept all alone.
I didn”t mind that our work schedules kept us apart. As part of my job as an architect, I traveled quite a bit, and he, as the President CEO of the Rhodes Hotel chain, was on the road as well. But he made it a point to be home every other week when he had his daughter officially with him.
He”d introduced me to Sophia six months ago, and it hadn”t gone well. She loved her dad, and it was apparent she wanted her parents back together. I”d tried to bring it up with Gabriel that he and his ex-wife living so close together and being in each other”s homes so much was confusing for a child. He”d told me not to be jealous, and that I was the only woman in his life.
I couldn”t begrudge him for loving his daughter and for prioritizing her. He should. But I wanted to be important to someone. I wanted to be a priority. I”d never had that. My aunt was old when I moved in, and more than her taking care of me, I”d been taking care of her. My father had checked out, and I didn”t even get token Christmas messages as I used to some years back. I had no clue where my mother was.
When I first met Gabriel, I was working on a Rhodes Hotel project refurbishing the conference area. The attraction had been instant. He asked me out, and I said yes first and thenchecked with my then-boss, Nina, if it was okay to date a client. I was more reckless than I had ever been.
Nina was blasé about it. ”Gabe is a professional. If something goes wrong between the two of you, it”s not going to become a work issue.”
The sexual part of our relationship was intense, and just thinking about him made my nipples pebble, and I became wet. God, he was sexy. At five feet seven, I wasn”t short, but he still towered over me even when I wore heels. He wore suits as well as he wore jeans; and worked out with a personal trainer four days a week. His ex-wife also had a slim body that looked like it went through a gym several hours a week. If I managed two Pilates classes a week, I was lucky.
But all my insecurities went out of the window when he was with me because he looked at me with such hunger that I had no doubt that he found me attractive. Gabriel Rhodes was a handsome and very wealthy man. He had no reason to pick me when there were probably women lining up everywhere for him.
Me: It”s late, and I”m going to put in some work on the Tybee Island project. Rain check?
His response was immediate, and I knew he was relieved. He didn”t really want me at his place. It was always weird because of Sophia. I”d wondered why Gabriel had introduced me to his daughter and he”d said that it would make it easier for us to spend time at his place. It hadn”t worked out that way.
Gabriel: Okay. Are you free tomorrow evening?
Me: I think so.
It took a couple of minutes, and Gabriel wrote back: Damn. I can”t do it tomorrow, baby. Sophia has something at school. How about Friday?
I hated how I felt—annoyed about him being a good father. I wish he”d balance his personal life and parental duties just a little.
Me: I can”t on Friday. I”m going to New Orleans for the Carter Hotel opening on Saturday.
Gabriel: I”m away next week. It”s Fall break.
He was taking Sophia to Paris. He hadn”t asked me to join them, and I understood it was a father-daughter trip. He was so excited about taking her to one of his favorite cities in the world that it was hard not to feel happy for him.
Me: We”ll see each other when you come back.
Gabriel: Can you cancel New Orleans? You weren”t the chief architect on that project.
I felt something snap inside me. He couldn”t change Sophia”s school plans, but he wanted me to change mine.
I stared at his last message and ran a hand through my hair. I”d had it blow-dried and left it loose because Gabriel liked that. I opened my drawer and found a hair band. I twisted my hair into a messy bun, keeping it off my face while I worked.
I decided not to respond to the message. I didn”t know what to say. I went into the kitchen and found a salad and a bottle of Pinot Grigio from some party we”d had at work. I took them both into my office and ate while I looked through the Tybee Island hotel blueprints.
My phone rang, and I saw it was Gabriel. I was tempted to not pick it up, but that would be petty, and I was a grown up.
”Hey,” I said coolly. ”All okay?”
”You mad at me?”
I wanted to say yes. How can you ask me to change my plans, something I am excited about? I”d spent days and nights working on the New Orleans hotel project even though Nina had been the project lead, and I wanted to see how it had turned out.
”No,” I lied.
”You sure?”
”Yeah.”
”Baby, I miss you.”
Then spend time with me, damn it. ”Me too.” I felt tears prick my eyes as the knowledge that this relationship was not going to work established itself in my mind. I loved him so much—and my heart was breaking. Maybe breaking it off, like ripping off a bandage, would be better instead of this death by a thousand cuts or a thousand missed dates.
”I miss you too.”
”You still at work?”
”Yeah.”
”I”m watching some chick flick with Sophia. I stepped out to talk to you.”
”She okay?”
”Yeah, just girl drama. Did you have a lot of that?”
”No.” Because no one would put up with my drama. I was and continued to be drama-free.
”You sound angry with me. Quiet.”
”Just tired. I still have an hour of work to do before I head home.”
”Come over,” there was a hint of desperation in his voice, like he knew we were slipping away from each other.
”Gabriel, it”s not a good idea. Remember last time?”
”I know, but…fuck, Aurora, I won”t see you for over ten days.”
”I know. I”m sorry. I can”t cancel New Orleans. It”s an important project and—”
”I should never have sent that stupid message. Of course, you can”t. I was being selfish.”
And I fell for him even more. How could I not?
”Ah…do you want to come to New Orleans?”
I heard his long-suffering sigh. ”I wish. My parents are doing the Rhodes Family Annual charity luncheon lunch thing this Saturday; we”ll be there all day.”
By we, I knew he meant Iris, Sophia, and him. His ex-wife attended all the family events, which was why I hadn”t been invited to any of them. He”d been up front about it, saying he”d like to introduce me to his parents one-on-one and not at some big party or event. And because Iris would be there, he didn”t want it to be awkward.
But each time it happened, it made me feel dejected, and this time something cracked inside me. I felt like I was his mistress. Not good enough to take to see his parents, not good enough to be invited to Paris. Not good enough to be part of a family. Just not plain good enough.
”Well, I”m sure it”ll be fun.”
He paused. ”You”re wondering why I didn”t invite you?”
”No, we talked about it and I”m not here, anyway.” I didn”t want to talk about this because it hurt to hear him claim his ex-wife over me, even if that wasn”t exactly what he was doing. He was keeping his divorce friendly so his daughter would not be impacted by his decision to leave her mother.
”Baby, I hate doing this over the phone. Can”t you come over?”
”Gabriel—”
”I promise it won”t be like last time. I”ll be in bed with you. Please?”
Damn it! My spine was liquid around him. I felt pathetic,, but I knew I”d go see him, take whatever scraps he threw my way. Oh god, but these kinds of thoughts and resentment would kill us and destroy me. Gabriel was a good man. He was making the best of his life and I”d walked into it willingly. He wasn”t throwing me scraps. He was being a father first. That”s all it was.
”Okay. I”ll be there.” I gave in.
”Thanks, darling. And—” I heard Sophia call out to him then. ”I”ll see you soon. Go straight to my place. I”m at Iris”s, but I”ll come over as soon as you get here.”