Chapter 17
It feels like it takes forever, but our third week at Amery finally comes to an end. That Friday night, I stretch my legs across my bed as I lean against the headboard, my tablet opened to a book that I’m not really reading.
Trinity should be leaving the med wing soon, and I can’t wait.
No one knows when the student leaders plan to start the next round of initiations, and the waiting is wearing on my nerves.
As far as I’m aware, no one else from Fiama tested for another Society.
From our House, two people failed, and one person died.
Only Trinity’s first challenge resulted in a draw.
I know she feels humiliated, but I still think it could have been worse. At least she’s still alive.
Part of me is eager to get the next part over with so I can redeem myself and pretend none of this ever happened. Of course, another part is worried I could die trying or be asked to do something even worse. I’m not sure what I’ll do then. I refuse to hurt anyone; I don’t care who they are.
Rook obviously passed his first test, since he’s still here, but no one can seem to agree on which House he opted for.
I consider what it might be like to pledge the same House.
When he first arrived, I was terrified of the prospect, but maybe things have shifted.
Of course, once Knox takes over as scion, he’ll probably make Rook’s life a nightmare.
Plus, despite everything I know about Solitudes, I can’t picture Rook hurting someone willingly.
Wherever he ends up, I can’t help but notice the way my heart flutters and my stomach drops every time I think about him. Something I should definitely keep to myself.
A knock comes at the door, and Lacey walks over to open it, tossing me a glare. Several people tumble into the room, and from the volume of their voices, the pungent smell, and their general pink-cheeked dishevelment, they’re clearly already stewed in Hollow moonshine.
The newcomers make their way to the other side of the room, draping themselves across Winter’s and Lacey’s beds. Verity and Sal stumble over to Trinity’s empty corner, making out as Sal rolls on top of her, practically dry humping her in front of everyone.
“Um, hello,” I say, raising my voice. They ignore me. Or maybe they just can’t hear me over the sound of Verity’s moans and Sal’s sad little hip thrusts. “Hey! Could you not . . . do that there?”
Finally, they pull apart and glare. Verity and I have always been friendly with each other, but everything’s changed now.
“Trin is still in the med wing, and I’d like to keep her corner clean,” I add, knowing I’m being irrationally territorial, but this is her space. I spent last night tidying it up now that Dr. Perez has given her the all clear, but Trinity claims she’s still not feeling well enough to move.
I know she’s avoiding everyone, and I understand her desire to hide.
But she can’t stay there forever.
“She’s no longer Society.” Verity sniffs. “Who cares?”
“She still is,” I say, trying to keep my voice steady. “And I care.”
“Fine,” Verity says with a huff before the couple scoots off the bed, joining their friends to the sound of derisive laughter, definitely at my expense.
I try to ignore it, hoping they’ll all leave soon. Picking up my tablet, I flip through a few pages, searching for something to occupy me, when there’s a ding on my phone.
silver: sogno tonight. u coming, poet?
Sogno is a multistory club themed like a dreamscape, with fluffy clouds and bartenders and waiters dressed in practically nothing but white feathered wings.
Its notoriety is legendary, and we’re barred from entry when we’re younger. Trinity and I have been waiting for this moment for years. I can’t go without her—it wouldn’t be right. Plus, I’m not really in the mood for partying.
me: i think i’ll stay in, but thanks. i’m a bit tired
silver: waiting for trin?
me: yea
I wait for her to convince me to come. To voice some word of protest. I know it isn’t fair to hope, but Silver has been keeping her distance since my initiation.
While I understand it, it also hurts.
me: have fun
A long silence follows, and I imagine Hazel and Silver discussing their reply. When it comes, my heart sinks.
silver: thanks!
silver: u too
And that’s it. At least for tonight, I suppose.
Another knock comes at the door, and I quietly groan as another group enters. I recognize several faces, and a few try to catch my eye before remembering they’re supposed to be shunning me.
I focus on my screen until a shadow falls over me and someone collapses onto the foot of my bed. Knox drapes himself across my feet, and Jackson stands above me with one hand on his hip and the other planted on the wall.
Jackson offers me a brown glass bottle of Hollow moonshine, and I shake my head.
“Come with us,” Knox says, a touch too loudly. “We’re heading to Sogno.”
“You’re in a better mood,” I say, catching the scent of liquor on his breath. The bandage from Rook’s punch is gone, and only a bit of bruising remains around his eye.
“It’s the weekend,” he says. “I’m getting wasted. I’ll deal with that little fuck later.”
His eyes darken, and I regret reminding him about his beef with Rook. I’ve seen very little of him for the past week. He missed biology class yesterday, and I actually do need to speak with him about our assignment that’s due on Monday.
“I don’t want to go anywhere,” I say. “I’m too tired.” May as well use the same excuse.
“Boring,” Sal calls out as he ambles over, making a loud snoring sound as he grabs the bottle from Jackson.
“You guys have fun,” I say. “I’d really rather just stay in.”
Knox studies me for several long seconds, and I think he’s about to argue.
“If that’s what you want,” he says with an arched brow.
“That’s what I want.”
Again, he pauses as if he has more to say but changes his mind. “Next time?”
I shrug. “Sure. Maybe. We’ll see.”
“She’s so enthusiastic, isn’t she?” Sal says in a dry tone. “It’s like we’re threatening to rip out her toenails.”
A momentary flare of guilt burns in my gut. It’s kind of nice they seem to care more than my so-called friends, but I still don’t want to go without Trinity.
“It’s not you,” I say, hoping to appease him.
“We’re so handsome, too,” Jackson says with a pout as he tips the bottle into his mouth, and I can’t help the twitch of my smile.
Knox stuffs his hands in his pockets and gives me an are you sure? look.
“Next time,” I say with a bit more confidence. “Okay?”
“Okay,” he says, which seems to please all three of them.
I shouldn’t be so grateful they’re talking to me, but after Silver and Hazel’s dismissal, I can’t help it.
Being with Knox offers a kind of currency that protects me despite my status as a social pariah, but I’m also a mouse befriending a lion.
Knox gestures to his friends, and they leave while Winter and Lacey continue entertaining.
I’m attempting to lose myself in my book when a harsh crackle zips down my spine.
I inhale sharply as it spreads to my fingers and toes, making them tingle.
The threatening storm is starting to build, flashes of lilac streaking across the sky every few minutes.
I stare out the window with my knees tucked up, watching the clouds tumble.
They’re moving fast, and I’m not sure I can withstand their pull tonight. It’s been too long since I absorbed a cloud burst, and my plans to stay in my room go up in smoke as another buzz flashes in my temples. At the very least, I need to hide. I’m not sure I can conceal my discomfort tonight.
Trying to go unnoticed, I slide off the bed and grab my bag, intending to head to the library. At the last moment, I snag my coat, just in case, and quietly slip into the hall.
Music pounds from the various dorm rooms, and a door opens to my left, a group of kids stumbling out.
I wait a few seconds for them to leave first, hoping to avoid any more awkward interactions tonight, then hang a left at the bottom of the stairs as another tingle spreads along my back.
I don’t think I can ride this out in the library after all. I need relief. I need to touch Spark.
I consider my options. I could go to the roof, but what if someone sees me up there?
A balcony? No. They’re too exposed and open.
What I need is to get out of the city, where no one can find me.
I’ve done it before, when I was desperate. I know a spot where I’m invisible on the city’s outskirts.
Another loud group appears at the end of the hall, and I freeze as Domino emerges with her cog friends. I consider bolting, but she calls my name.
“Poet!” She grins as she approaches. “This is my friend Journey.” She gestures to a pretty brunette sidling up next to her.
“Nice to meet you,” I say.
“You’re the one they’re all talking about,” Journey says, perusing me with an unflinching look. “What’s it like being rich and powerful? Or maybe you’re less powerful now? People are mad, but they also seem to kind of fear and respect you. I guess it’s confusing, right?”
I don’t think she breathes even once as I find myself slowly backing away. Not from her as much as this list of questions that makes my stomach hurt. The last thing I want to talk about is what it’s like to be hated by everyone you know.
“Journey,” Domino says, an air of impatience in her tone. “You’re doing that thing again.”
“Oh yeah,” Journey says with a wince. “Sorry.”
“We’re headed to Sogno,” Domino says, perhaps to cover for her friend’s gaffe. “What about you?”
I’m still wearing my uniform, clearly not dressed for a night out. She looks behind me as though she expects a group of friends to materialize.
“No,” I answer. “I’ve got some homework to do. Have fun.”
Then, before they can invite me to come—not that I should expect them to—I walk off. A moment later, I stop and turn around. “Thanks again for giving me a place to sleep the other night.”
Domino nods. “Sure, anytime. It’s always empty if you need it again.” Her friend smiles in agreement, loosening a tight knot in my chest. It’s a small act of kindness, but I appreciate it more than they know.
Without saying anything else, I turn again and head toward the library.
It’s Friday night, so I’m not surprised to find it empty.
“Library” is probably too strong a word to represent what this room is.
I’ve seen pictures of what libraries used to look like in the Warming Age, when they still printed books.
With everything digitized, libraries are now just large screens suspended above tables with chairs at which to work and study, where everyone is expected to speak in a hushed voice.
A security guard sits in a chair near the door, his feet planted wide and his hands clasping the armrests as he nods off. I’m searching for a quiet corner when someone steps out from behind a large screen, nearly knocking me over.
Rook clutches a tablet in his hand. He’s dressed casually in the same jeans and cowboy boots he was wearing when he first arrived. My gaze zeroes in on his feet.
“Where did you get those?” I ask. He looks down and then back up.
“A scavenger,” he says with a shrug.
“You have scavengers in the Wastes?”
It feels like a ridiculous question the moment it’s out of my mouth, and his smirk confirms it.
“Yeah. In fact, they bring us the really good stuff before they head to the city.” He taps his heel on the edge of a table leg as if to demonstrate that fact. It’s hard to argue, since I’ve never seen anything like them before, except in pictures from the past.
“What else do you have?” I ask, reluctantly curious about his world. His brow arches, and he props his hip on the table with his arms folded.
“We have everything,” he answers confidently.
“That’s not what they tell us.”
He huffs out a derisive laugh. “I’m aware.”
“Then why did you come here?”
He narrows his eyes. “Curious today, aren’t we?”
“Yes,” I answer, refusing to take his bait.
“Fine,” he says, running his fingers through his hair, his forearm flexing in a way that is a bit too distracting for my taste. “We don’t have everything. No school like this or your Houses. And survival’s much harder.”
I glance at the tablet clutched in his hand.
“But you can read.”
“I can read.”
“Is that . . . common?”
He hesitates as though he doesn’t want to answer.
“Most people can manage the basics,” he says. “But they’re also focused on other priorities.”
I nod. It’s not completely surprising to hear.
“I finished our biology assignment,” he says, flipping the screen around. He swipes a finger up, showing me the completed essay. I eye him with suspicion and scan it, impressed by his analysis.
“If you don’t have school, where did you learn all this?”
“I didn’t say we don’t have school. I said we don’t have one like this.”
My gaze meets his. “Why did you finish it? You’ve been missing classes.”
“I’ve been avoiding your boyfriend.” His tone suggests it isn’t because he’s scared of Knox but rather annoyed about having to teach him yet another lesson about respect.
“He’s not my boyfriend.” The words are out before I can stop them.
A line of confusion forms between Rook’s brows before it smooths away. Thankfully, before I can do something I’ll regret like reach out and touch it. “Oh yeah?” I’m not sure why that seems to amuse him.
“Yeah.” I don’t elaborate, but I want to clarify that I don’t belong to Knox.
“Okay, if you say so. And I finished it because I thought it would be easier that way.”
He leaves the thought hanging.
Easier for me or for him?
“I don’t want to take credit for your work.”
He huffs out a snort. “It’s not a big deal. You can owe me one.”
I raise a brow. “That doesn’t exactly put me at ease.”
“Well, it’s done. So, unless you want to redo it for absolutely no reason, you’ll just have to accept it.”
“Next time, I’ll do the work.”
“Will there be a next time? So eager to work with me again?” The corner of his mouth crooks up in a cocky smile, and it’s all I can do not to wring his neck.
“You know what I mean—”
A sizzle scrapes up my back, buzzing under my skin with such force that my heart skips a beat. I slap a palm to my chest and retreat a few steps as Rook reaches out.
“You okay?” he asks, his big hand wrapping around my arm to help steady me. It does nothing to calm the acceleration of my heart.
But I can’t answer.
I need to get out of here immediately.
Without another word, I turn on my heel and walk away.
“Hey!” Rook calls. “Where’re you going? Are you okay?”
I don’t look back as I duck out of the library and run.