Chapter 25
It takes only a few minutes to get settled in the same bed Rook just vacated. It’s still warm from his body, where his scent lingers. Fresh grass. Green apples. I shake my head, trying to dislodge wayward thoughts of what it might be like to get closer to it.
“I’m going to attach these,” Dr. Eze says, bringing me back to reality as she peels the stickers off a new set of nodes and affixes them to my skin. Then she turns to the beeping machine next to her, adjusts a few knobs, and presses some buttons.
“We’ll start slowly,” she assures me with a warm smile. Through it all, I’m excruciatingly aware of the Extinguishers and their stunners nearby. What kind of monster chooses to join them? Who delights in hunting down innocent people to be delivered to some nefarious fate?
But I acknowledge they might be necessary.
That I’m not innocent, and that I could be the monster, not them.
My heart is pounding through my chest as Dr. Eze lays a gentle hand on my shoulder. “Just lie back and breathe,” she tells me. “Nothing to worry about.”
Sure. Easy for her to say. Even if I weren’t terrified of being discovered, the fact that someone left the room unconscious a few minutes ago would worry anyone.
Then she slowly cranks a dial as the machine whirs to life.
I feel it instantly. Electricity runs under my skin and through my bones like little muted rivers.
It’s different from Spark, just like she claimed.
There’s no all-consuming pain threatening to rip me apart.
It burns just a little, and I wince at the slight discomfort, but this is nothing.
I must make a sound because her gaze flicks to me before returning to the screen.
“You’re doing great,” she assures. “A little more.”
She twists the knob another notch before the pulse kicks up. I can’t quite describe the sensation. It’s like I’ve been wrapped in cotton and held against an electric fence. It isn’t pleasant, but it isn’t the bittersweet agony I’m accustomed to.
A presence appears at the glass wall separating me from the rest of the room. The dark-haired Extinguisher is watching me intently now. I wish I knew what he was looking for. Can he see it? Or is it Dr. Eze who’ll be able to tell?
My palms turn sweaty as we continue in the same vein for what feels like several minutes. I try to mimic the same discomfort I witnessed in everyone else, hoping it appears like I’m being affected the same way. I wince and squeeze my fists. Close my eyes and inhale deep breaths.
Pulses thrum through my body, almost like I’ve been filled with dense slabs of foam. It’s heavy and light at the same time.
The Extinguisher moves around the glass and approaches the bed, stopping at my feet.
From here I can read his name tag. Lieutenant Dire.
How fitting. My vision smears as my breathing turns short.
Why is he coming over? Did he do that with anyone else?
Suddenly, I can’t remember a single thing that happened in the last ten minutes.
He tucks his hands into the straps of his harness and squints at the dials on the machine. Dr. Eze turns to face him, allowing him to study the monitors with her mouth pressed together. Even in my increasingly panicked state, I get the sense she isn’t a fan of his scrutiny.
“All good?” he asks.
I stop breathing. Black spots form in my eyes. I squirm on the table, torn between ripping off the nodes to run away and lying here perfectly still, hoping that somehow, I’ll escape this. Dire taps the glass on one of the dials, and I flinch, almost like he’s threatened to backhand me.
“All good,” Dr. Eze says, her voice cheerful. Cool and calm. It takes me a moment to process her words. Dire doesn’t move, his eyes narrowing further.
A scream tears through the room, and we all turn to look.
Someone is thrashing wildly in the next bed.
Points of light flash over their skin as they scream and scream in agony.
I recognize a guy from House Fiama. Jacen.
Suddenly, he stops, his limbs going limp, his head lolling to the side.
Puffs of black smoke curl off his skin, now turned a sickly shade of gray.
Lieutenant Dire quickly rushes over as doctors gather around the dead student.
“Skies,” I whisper.
Dr. Eze reaches down and squeezes my wrist, and I start breathing again. Lieutenant Dire’s focus has moved away from me, and air floods my lungs as my vision returns to normal. I exhale and then inhale several times before wiping my forehead.
The doctor looks down at me, and something flickers across her face, an expression like a question lifting in her gaze. A quick brightening of her eyes and then the press of her mouth at the corners. It feels like an unspoken message.
Does she know? Can she tell what I am? Did she just lie to the Extinguisher? The only thing worse than being a Spark Keeper is lying to protect one. Why would she do that for me?
We break eye contact, and she flips off the machine. The pulses take a few seconds to dissipate, leaving only a slight trembling in my limbs. They’re already carrying Jacen’s body away. Henry told us we always lose one.
“It’s okay,” Dr. Eze says with a reassuring smile, but the knot of worry is permanently buried in my chest. If she suspected something, I’d already be in handcuffs. Right? “Take your time getting up. You’ll be a little wobbly for the next hour or so.”
Slowly, I sit up and swing my feet to the floor, staring at the tiles as I wait for my head to stop swimming. My heart flutters like it’s been shocked several times; I’m starting to understand why Storm Breakers have limited lifespans.
“You did well with that level of charge,” Dr. Eze says, her tone businesslike. “We can start there again next time and likely maintain that strength. It’s not about hammering it in; it’s about building up a tolerance, but I can tell you already have a natural immunity.”
I look up quickly and meet her gaze. She holds it and arches a brow ever so slightly. Is she trying to tell me she knows? And that she won’t report me? I’m probably imagining things.
Someone opens the door to our enclosure, pulling our gazes apart.
“Ready for the next round, Doctor?” an assistant asks, and she nods.
I’m struck by how quickly we’re just moving on from Jacen. Like it never even happened.
“Just give Poet a moment, and then you can send in the next cadet.”
The doctor begins typing something into her tablet. I wish I could see if it’s about me and, more importantly, what she’s saying. I’m still aware of the Extinguishers watching. I can’t risk asking.
I’ve been delaying for too long because she looks over with a furrow between her brows. “Is there anything else I can help you with?”
“No.” I shake my head. “Thank you.”
She returns to her work, and I enter the main area. I don’t feel quite like myself. The false charges pulsing under my skin are a foreign invader, throwing off my balance.
Plus, watching Jacen die is completely fucking with my head.
“You look a bit pale,” comes a deep voice. It’s Henry, and he’s giving me a concerned look.
“I don’t feel great,” I admit.
“That’s normal at the beginning,” he says. “Makes most people a bit nauseous. The good news is you’ve passed the first hurdle and can start training. But for now, you’re free to leave and lie down.”
Right. I’d almost completely forgotten that’s why I was here at all. I lay a hand against my stomach and nod. “Okay, thanks. I think I’ll do that.”
I spot Domino now in the examination room. She sits on her bed and gives me a little wave. The image of Jacen’s skin curling with smoke flashes before my eyes, and I watch until I’m assured she’s okay handling the current.
“Henry,” I say, turning toward him. “How are you doing?”
He takes a deep breath, running a hand over his closely shorn curls. “I’m fine, Poet.”
He gives nothing away. It’s been three years. How much does he miss my brother? I want to ask him what he’s been up to. Has he found someone new? Is he in love again? I hope so. He deserves to be happy.
“You should come by the penthouse for dinner sometime,” I say. “My mom would love to see you.”
His brows draw together. “Would she?”
The question is pointed, and it’s then that I understand I probably knew very little about their relationship.
I only saw the brother I loved and the man he brought home.
Did my parents disapprove? Henry is pledged to House Fiama but isn’t from a family of particular influence. I suspect that mattered to my father.
“I’m sorry,” I say, even if I’m not entirely sure what I’m apologizing for.
Henry blows out a long sigh that seems to sit heavy in his chest. “Maybe you and I could have lunch sometime and catch up?”
I give him a weak smile. “I’d love that.”
“Great, now go get some rest.”
With a nod, I make my way into the hall and toward my room on shaky legs.
Every once in a while, my world tilts, and I have to stop to catch my breath.
“Poet?” comes Knox’s voice.
Damn, I’ve been doing such a good job avoiding him lately.
“Are you okay? Where have you been? I’ve been looking for you. Why do you keep ignoring my texts?”
It’s too many questions for my clouded thoughts. I bypass them all as I keep walking, trying to appear steadier than I feel.
He shuffles beside me, easily keeping up, before grabbing me by the elbow. I bristle at the contact.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, I’m just not feeling well. I’m going to lie down.”
“Where were you? Where’d you go after the memorial? What did General Sol want from you?”
More questions. Things I don’t want to answer.
“Can we talk about this later?”
I dismiss him, but he isn’t to be deterred.
I try to pull my arm away. His grip only tightens, and that finally sets me off.
“Let go of me!” I bite out. He doesn’t. “I was where I was. It’s none of your damn business.”
“I’m responsible for you—”
“No, you aren’t yet, actually.”
“If your father hears of this, he won’t be happy.”
“Knox, I don’t give a fuck.”