5. Cassidy
Chapter 5
Cassidy
T here were so many rolling hills, cliff edges, and woodland. Completely in the dark and stranded with the biggest male I’d ever seen in my life. The tension on the way up here was palpable. I was an inconvenience to him and although this wasn’t my ideal situation to be in, I certainly didn’t have the sense he’d hurt me. It was simply how much he unnerved me that put me on edge.
And despite that, I only had one night to figure everything out. What would I do tomorrow when the tree was lifted? I was completely broke—worse then broke. I was jobless. Homeless. And stranded in a town that didn’t even have a dot on the map. Issobelle and Clover would’ve been better suited in this situation. They were more versatile than me. I, however, was certainly not cut out for nature and wildlife.
And what would I do, call them after only one night away to express the dilemma I was in? There was no way I could do that because then I’d have to come clean about everything and that was something I refused to share. I was too scared, as if the very mention of my parents and him would manifest the situation. I’d just lay low for a few months and they’d give up—surely. But then again, they’d never cut off my credit cards before.
No, I could manage one night with this real-life-looking barbarian.
With little effort, he carried my suitcase and he’d been right. I would’ve struggled dragging that through the snow, but he made it look like it weighed nothing. When he opened the door, it exposed the edges of a living room in the darkness. I couldn’t see a damn thing beyond. It was eerily quiet in there.
I was just so used to the constant chatter and life of Manhattan and this was the furthest thing from my comfort zone. And it made the situation with this stranger somehow feel intimate. I wanted to slap my cheeks. Was my mind really only trained on one thing? I was literally in the shittiest predicament I’d been in… ever, and all I could think about was how ridiculously handsome this older man was. I needed to go to therapy ASAP.
I tried to peer over Eric’s shoulder as he opened the door further and flicked on the light. The cabin sparked to life and when he stepped in and placed the suitcase beside the door, my jaw unhinged as I swept my gaze over the entire room. “Wow.” I whistled, genuinely surprised.
The outside of the cabin was deceivingly small compared to the ample space inside. On the left was a brick fireplace. In front of it was a cozy leather sofa. The colors of deep gray and brown decorated the space, matching the man standing beside me. Across the room and up two steps on a raised level was the main bedroom with a king-sized bed. My mouth widened at the view behind it. The large floor-to-ceiling windows showed off the dark outlines of what might’ve been rolling hills and mountains. I could’ve only imagined what that view might’ve looked like during the day.
Eric walked to the fireplace, his expert hands tending to it quickly. On the right was a long kitchen and island bench, the grays of the bench somehow deepening the space. Beside it was a closed room, in what I imagined to be the bathroom, and another door which might’ve stepped out to a balcony in the back.
Shadow nudged me in, reminding me I was still standing at the door with my mouth gaping at the sheer and unexpected beauty of the cabin. I chastised myself for being judgmental, having thought that it was a run-down little shack. And instead… it was this glorious hidden oasis.
“This is your home?” I asked, stepping over the wooden threshold.
“Did you expect me to live in a cave or something?” he asked, blowing on the fire.
“Would you be annoyed if I said yes?”
He peered over his shoulder, somewhat unimpressed. I laughed, thinking myself hilarious. So, charm and jokes did not work on this brute. Unfortunately, they were the two things I fell back on when nervous in any situation.
“All of this looks really new,” I said, still appreciating the space. I felt like I’d just walked into some luxurious cabin resort.
“Well, I only built it about ten years ago.”
My jaw dropped. “You built this?”
“Do you not have men who can build things where you come from?” He grunted. He had his back to me, hands on hips as he surveyed the fire as it grew in size.
“Well sure, I guess. So remind me what it is you do again? Café owner?” I asked, admiring the wooden chandelier above. The furnishings were simple but beautiful. And although I didn’t know Eric at all, it very much felt like him. It even smelt like him. That bold, woodsy earth cologne perfuming the air. And I wasn’t certain if he used cologne or that was his sheer sweat. The man was built like a god. Celibacy , I reminded myself. I’d sworn off men until I found the right one.
He walked over to his kitchen, opening the fridge and scooping what looked like a home-prepared meal for Shadow, who obediently waited for his dish to be filled.
“Something like that.”
“So, you’re a café-owning, dog-training fifty-year-old?”
His sense of humor was practically non-existent which made me even more nervous. He grunted, not necessarily in approval but as if that was all the effort he could muster in the conversation thus far. “Eat or drink whatever you like. The bed’s all yours. I’ll sleep on the sofa.”
My gaze drifted from him to the bed. “I can’t,” I gushed. There was no way in hell I was sleeping in that bed. Gentleman or not, that bed oozed testosterone.
And then my gaze dropped and narrowed on the giant axe beside the front door. A thick lump bobbled in my throat. I began to nervously laugh, catching his attention again. He looked at the axe and offered an exasperated sigh in realization.
“Cassidy, I don’t think I’ve ever had to tell someone so many times that I’m not intending to chop them into little pieces and scatter them into the woodland. And trust me, there’s a lot already on that list.”
I wasn’t sure if he was joking or not. I suddenly found something fascinating on my jacket and nodded. “Well of course. I know that.” I didn’t fear this beast of a man but nor did I know this world either. “I feel as if every teenage horror movie I watched always started in either a cabin or a tent,” I rambled. “So why do you own an axe?”
“I cut wood for the locals daily.”
My eyebrows knitted together. “Wait so you’re a café-owning, dog-training lumberjack?”
He downed a glass full of water. “You forgot the people chopping part,” he growled with a straight face. I stared at him stunned. Another joke? So, this oaf of a man could actually manage them?
He waltzed over to a cupboard, pulling out a thick woolly towel and handed it to me. So close, he loomed over me, and I’d never felt so comparatively small to someone else. And I hovered at five ten myself.
He cleared his throat when I said and did nothing, nudging the towel into my hands. “Take your shoes off and have a shower so you don’t get sick.”
Shadow came to my side, licking his lips, evidently well fed. His head nuzzled against my fingertips and I found myself curling them through his fur, kind of enjoying the experience Despite how bizarre it was.
“Thank you,” I stuttered out. Eric nodded and walked back into the kitchen. “Are you hungry? I can cook something.” He opened a freezer full of meats and I paled.
He seemed confused and then realization dawned on him. “You’re a vegetarian, aren’t you?”
I offered him a tight smile. “I’m not very hungry anyway. And it’s not that I can’t stand the sight of meat or anything but that’s a lot, do you eat all of this?” I did a double take of him and then rolled my eyes. Of course he did. Look at the size of him? “Or is this just a week’s worth of food for you?”
“Should last me the month. I have fresh—”
“Thank you but there’s no need,” I quickly spluttered. I couldn’t be any more of an inconvenience and besides, there was no way I’d be able to eat right now anyway. My stomach was in knots the moment the cold dread washed over me at the reminder there was still so much to be dealt with tomorrow.
He didn’t seem to like my answer but slowly closed his overflowing fridge of fresh supplies. “Well, if you want anything it’s there.”
“Thank you.” I peered down at my cell again, that knot in my stomach wrangling tighter. Something just felt off. “Also do you have Wi-Fi or something up here? My cell doesn’t have any reception and I’d like to message my friend my whereabouts.”
His eyebrows knitted in confusion. “I have reception up here, show me your cell?”
Reluctance traveled through me. Was this where he stole my phone and—
As if reading my thoughts, he rolled his eyes. Actually rolled his eyes. “I’m not throwing you to the wolves, Cassidy.”
“There’s wolves?” I squeaked.
His penetrating stare assessed me dryly. “Not sighted since the late nineteen hundreds.” His hand was still outstretched. Slowly, I pulled out my cell realizing the ridiculousness of it, with its pink cover and fluffy keychain that hung over those thick calloused hands. He could certainly crush it with one squeeze.
He assessed it for a moment, flicking through a few settings. I peered over his shoulder curiously, making sure he wasn’t going through any of my private pictures. Not that he seemed like the type. But he was a guy after all.
“You’re not out of reception, snowflake.” Snowflake? “Your service has been suspended.”
“Suspended?” That dragged my attention away from the “snowflake” comment.
“Yea did you forget to pay a few bills or something?”
I laughed. Oh, he was serious. “No, I’ve paid everything.”
“Hmm that’s usually the main reason why they’ll suspend it. Unless someone else has access to your account and suspended it,” he said as he handed me back the cell.
A cold sweat rolled over me again. No. Surely, they wouldn’t. My parents and I might’ve had our differences right now, but surely, they wouldn’t cut off my cell as well?
With my credit card and cell, were they basically holding my necessities for ransom, so I came scurrying back?
“Does someone else have access to your cell?” he asked.
I perked up, plastering on a fake smile. “Not that I know of. It’s too late, I’ll deal with this tomorrow,” I beamed. His gaze narrowed on me as I fluttered to my suitcase. “That shower sounds pretty good now.”
I didn’t even know where to begin processing this new information. What if they’d cut off everything? I was literally stranded. I flicked open the suitcase, my face paling. Shit I’d grabbed the wrong suitcase. I was in such a fluster that I’d grabbed the one with all my makeup, hair accessories, panties, and bras. I wanted to burst out into tears. How had I managed to screw up so badly? And this suitcase now seemed to be the final catastrophic catalyst to send me over.
“What’s wrong?” Eric’s voice boomed over my shoulder. I snapped the suitcase shut before he could peer in, embarrassed. I also wasn’t going to strut out in only a thong and bra to sleep in.
I cleared my throat. Why was I being so embarrassed around this man? Did I feel judged? Self-conscious? I didn’t care any other time, and besides, most people liked me. I was determined that this big brute would be no different. “I grabbed the wrong suitcase and don’t have my pj’s.” There I said it.
“What else could be in that suitcase?” he asked suspiciously as he backed away and began to sift through his own wardrobe.
“Do you really want the answer?” I asked skeptically, considering he came across as a man of few words, he seemed awfully chatty since we’d walked in. Or was he maybe nervous as well?
“Here,” he instructed. Just in time, I’d caught the long, oversized flannel shirt he’d tossed. “You can wear this.”
Red heated my cheeks, and I couldn’t look directly at him. Wasn’t this just getting weirder? I didn’t even know this man. But I couldn’t sleep in skintight jeans either. “Thank you.”
Without delay, I scurried into the bathroom, again surprised by its sophisticated arrangement. How on earth did he build something so beautiful here in the middle of the mountains?
I stared at myself in the mirror as I stripped, the gravity of my dire situation weighing on me. Tomorrow I’d be able to leave. And then what? I had a quarter tank of gas which would barely get me over the Canadian border. I had no cash. And no cell apparently. I took a shaky breath, doing everything I could manage to supress the tears that wanted to overflow.
I stepped into the hot shower, grateful for its heat as it thawed out my bones. Slowly, I found myself sinking to the bottom of the shower, curling my arms around my legs and dipping my head, allowing the hot water to wash over my back as I quietly sobbed.
I couldn’t go back to my parents because it meant I’d have to deal with everything I’d worked so hard to run away from at this point. Having my credit cards and cell suspended only reminded me of how truly owned I was by them. But I never thought it would come to this. I cried, angry at myself for not creating a safety net for myself. Why had I been so naive as to think I could play out this new life I’d created in Manhattan without consequence?
And now what was I going to do? As of tomorrow, I’d have to leave and go where?
Maybe it was all the driving that had me beat down. Usually, I would’ve thought of an alternative exit strategy by now, and yet nothing came to mind. Only what appeared to be rock bottom as I sat on the tiles of some stranger’s shower.
Thoughtfully, I squirted some of the shower gel into my palms not surprised by the intense masculine smell of it. I massaged my body with it, much preferring the smell of this than feeling cold and gross after the full day’s drive.
But I couldn’t hide in here forever. As much as I wanted to. I stood up, a slight head spin from the steam and crying as I stepped out, turning the shower off.
I curled the fluffy gray towel around me, patting my face before my entire body locked up. On the middle of the bathroom floor was a spider. I screamed, almost ripping the door off its hinges and bolting out of the room.
Eric jerked up, and in two strides he was tucking me behind his back, confused. Shadow growled at the ominous presence coming from the bathroom.
“What is it?” Eric asked, looking back and forth.
I pointed, hot water still beading down my back and legs. “There’s a spider,” I gushed, my voice shaking.
I saw the noticeable tension ripple away from him until it was replaced by something else. A booming laugh.
Disheveled, I tightened the towel around my chest, now suddenly self-conscious that I was standing so closely to this man naked. And yet it did nothing to deter his thunderous laughter that created ample butterflies in my stomach.
“It’s big!” I said, popping out my hip with my hand on it.
“Of course it is, snowflake.”
I peered over his shoulder as he so effortlessly scooped it up in his hand and walked toward the door. Okay maybe in his hands it didn’t look so big. Shadow was by his side the entire time, curious by what Eric was handling.
Heat flushed my cheeks as the crackling fireplace grabbed my attention. Wow it was so warm in here now.
Eric dusted his hands and closed the door. When he turned, his gaze quickly drifted down to my toes. His gaze diverted as he quickly looked away from my almost-naked state.
A new kind of heat rose to my cheeks. I’d never been embarrassed to show my body before. So why now? Was it because of the celibacy I’d vowed when leaving Manhattan? It had been three months since I’d been intimate with any man, and considering my track record, that was a while. And why was I even thinking about this?
“I’ll go change,” I quickly gushed, dashing back into the bathroom. My heart pounded. This was way too close to be spending time with a gorgeous lumberjack. Not only had I hit rock bottom but the fates were playing a cruel joke to boot. I took a shaky breath, trying to relax. Stop being so conceited. He’s probably not into you. There. As easy as that, I was able to clear away the immediate thoughts that came to mind as to what I would do to him… climb him like a tree for example. This time I did slap my cheeks. Enough.
It felt strange not having my usual night routine with my creams and lotions, and my hair was going to be a giant mess tomorrow morning without my sprays. I sighed. Wow I really had hit rock bottom.
I put on a thong and threw on the oversized flannel. Wow did this really fit him? It came to my knees. I looked back and forth in the mirror kind of surprised that I liked the style. It didn’t flatter in the way that I’d usually wear tight dresses but it was, well kind of cute. A pinup of “boyfriend/girlfriend goals.” Not that a stranger for one night held that kind of magnitude but I wasn’t as uncomfortable by wearing it.
When I walked out, the lights had been switched off, all but two lamps. One beside the sofa I’d be staying on that already had a multitude of pillows and blankets thrown over it. And the other light was on Eric’s bed side table. He was already rolled over to the side in his bed, with Shadow on a pillow by the floor. His larger figure was noticeable under the blankets and the dark outline of mountains through the ceiling-high windows stretched behind him.
I went to say goodnight but tightened my lips. He was probably already sleeping anyway. I tucked myself under the blankets, surprised by the sofas comfort. I hadn’t slept on many sofas, but there was something strange and beautiful about staring into the fireplace. The crackling seemed to break through my worrisome thoughts. Tomorrow, with a fresh mind, I’d figure out what I’d do.
I couldn’t help but notice the eerie howling wind, a twist in my stomach unable to unfurl even as I focused on the calmness of the crackling fire. An uncomfortable tension rippled through me, the sense that something bad was yet to come.