Chapter six #2
But the past few months have been different.
Ever since the suppressants started slipping, everything’s just felt…
off. Mood swings like whiplash, days where I can’t get out of bed, nights where the craving claws at me until I can barely think.
Headaches. Even nausea has started creeping in sometimes.
I can’t deny it anymore, not when it’s this loud. Not even to myself.
“Fourth,” Gabriel goes on, “I’ll be reaching out to some packs I trust. Alphas who might be a good fit and who are looking for an omega. We’ll arrange meetings, see if any of them feel right. The goal is to find you a permanent placement as quickly as possible.”
As quickly as possible. Like I’m a problem to be solved, not a person. But I knew this was a stopgap. I knew. Still, hearing it spelled out, with a plan and a timeline, makes it sting in a whole new way.
“Why can’t I look for my own packs?” I ask. “I don’t want to get stuck with your friends and have to come in contact with you later. I’d rather never see you guys again after I leave.”
“Lily, when you’re claimed by another pack our match will dissolve. You won’t even want us if you see us again down the road.”
I bite my tongue to stop my eyes from welling up. He’s right. I won’t want them anymore. And I won’t want the pack I’m with. I won’t want anyone anymore.
“Is there anything else?” I ask.
Gabriel hesitates, his eyes flashing with regret, maybe.
Maybe not. “I know this isn’t what you wanted,” he says softly.
“I think you came here hoping for us to honor the connection. And I’m so sorry, Lily, that I can’t give you that.
These rules aren’t meant to punish you. They’re meant to protect everyone. ”
“I understand.”
“Do you?” He leans forward, studying me like he can see all the way through.
“Because I need you to really listen, Lily. The bond between us is real. What I feel when I’m near you, what my alpha and my pack mates feel—it’s real.
But acting on those feelings would hurt Miles in ways I can’t allow.
So we have to be careful. We have to maintain boundaries. Even when it’s hard.”
Even when it’s hard. It’s a confession and a warning all at once. He means it. He feels it the same way I do. That makes it hurt more, somehow.
“I get it,” I say again. This time I mean it.
Gabriel nods, shoulders sagging just a little. “Good. Then I think—“
“Wait.” Gabriel raises his eyebrows, waiting.
“Miles’s conditions,” I say, thinking back to what I heard before he attacked me. “He must have some. Things he wants from this arrangement. What are they?”
There’s a look between Gabriel and Garrett. Then Gabriel sighs, defeated.
“He wants you gone within a month. He doesn’t want you touching his alphas. He doesn’t want you in the pack bedroom. And he doesn’t want you...” A pause. He’s picking his words carefully. “He doesn’t want you existing in his space any more than absolutely necessary.”
A month. Thirty days to find a new home, a pack I don’t want. Thirty days to stop wanting the ones I do. To disappear.
It’s not a lot, but it’s always better than the Foster pack. Anything but that.
“I can work with that,” I say. “I’ll stay out of his way, keep to my room. I won’t touch anyone without permission.” The words are bitter. “I’ll be a ghost.”
I’ve been a ghost for six years. What’s a little more? I know well how to disappear.
“Lily...” Garrett’s voice is thick with pain. “You shouldn’t have to—“
“It’s fine.” I cut him off, shaking my head. “Really. I’ve been invisible before. You think they care about omegas in the registry? They just want us gone.”
The three of us sit there in silence, a little awkward. I can sense Garrett wanting to argue. I see Gabriel fighting with himself, but neither says anything. The moment drags.
“I’d like to see my room now,” I say, standing up too fast. “If that’s alright.”
“Of course.” Gabriel stands too, already smoothing out his sweater, trying to be polite.
“I can do it.” Garrett is up before Gabriel can even finish offering. There’s a stubborn set to his jaw. “You should rest. You’ve been up all night, and the thing with Miles took a lot out of you. I’ll get Lily settled.”
For a half second, it looks like Gabriel might fight him on it. Then he just slumps a little, like he’s too tired to care.
“Fine. Lily, if you need anything—“
“I’ll ask Garrett. Thank you.”
And then we’re in the hallway, leaving Gabriel behind in the living room. I finally pay attention to the house—how the light spills in through high windows, the art on the walls, the stretch of polished wood under my feet.
“It’s beautiful,” I say, because it is, and because it’s easier than saying anything else.
“Gabriel designed most of it himself.” Garrett walks close, but not touching. Already following the rules. “He wanted it to feel like a home. Somewhere Miles could feel safe.”
“He really loves him,” I say, and this time it’s not a question.
“Yeah. He does.” Garrett glances at me. “We all do. Miles is... he’s difficult. He’s damaged. He can be downright mean. A lot of the time you wouldn’t even know he’s an omega if not for his scent. But he’s ours. He’s pack. We’d do anything to protect him.”
Even if that means giving up your other omega, I think but don’t say.
At the end of the hallway, Garrett opens a door. Inside is a bedroom. There’s a double bed, soft comforter, a window with a view of trees, a little desk, a bathroom tucked to the side. It’s not huge, but it’s perfect.
“This is you,” Garrett says, standing back to let me inside. “It’s not much, but—“
“It’s perfect.” I really mean it. After years of cramped cots and shared bathrooms at the registry, this is a palace. My suitcase is already waiting for me, like someone knew I’d need it.
I want to unpack, but I’m so tired I can barely stand. I just stand there for a while, trying to get my bearings.
“You should rest,” Garrett says, reading me with that uncanny alpha thing. “It’s been a hell of a day, and it’s barely noon. Get some sleep. I’ll bring you something to eat later.”
“You don’t have to—“
“I want to.” He’s backlit in the door, and the look on his face tugs at me. “Gabriel set all these rules about boundaries and limited contact, and I get why. But that doesn’t mean you have to be alone, Lily. That doesn’t mean we can’t be... friends, at least.”
Friends. It’s a far cry from what my omega wants.
“I’d like that,” I say.
Garrett smiles, and it changes everything about him. “Good. Then get some sleep. I’ll check on you in a few hours.”
He closes the door behind him.
I stand in the middle of the room for a long while, breathing in the emptiness and listening to the quiet, trying to make sense of the last few hours. Then I shuffle over to the bed and sit.
It’s so soft I almost cry. I don’t bother with my shoes or my clothes or anything else—I just curl up, careful of my shoulder, cheek pressed to the pillow—and let my eyes slide closed.
The last thing I hear before I drift off is footsteps in the hallway, and a voice rumbling low. Cyrus, I think.
“She’s going to be trouble.”
I already am.
I never hear the answer. I’m already gone, sinking into dreams full of cedar smoke, rejection, and the echo of an omega’s scream bouncing through an empty house.