Chapter 8 #2
"Hwan and Jin-ho," I confirmed, staring into my water glass. "Those are the two who've triggered. Three more waiting."
"And you ran from them," Jeni said, her voice still slightly dazed. "You ran from two members of SIREN after your soulmate bonds triggered. Keira, do you understand what most omegas would give—"
"Most omegas didn't watch their mother die from bond complications," I cut her off, sharper than I intended, the words coming out with edges that cut, then immediately softened as guilt washed over me. "I'm sorry. I'm not angry at you. I'm just terrified."
"Because you think what happened to your mother is going to happen to you," Jeni finished gently, her expression softening with understanding, her dark eyes filled with a compassion that made my chest ache.
"I'm dying, Jeni," I whispered, the confession falling from my lips before I could stop it.
"Soul sickness from incomplete bonds. Two triggered in less than two days, and I can already feel my body failing.
The fever, the weakness, the way everything hurts.
Three more waiting to trigger. The research says omegas don't survive five incomplete pack bonds. "
Jeni's face went pale as fresh snow, her grip on the table tightening until her knuckles turned white as bone. "Then you have to complete them. If incomplete bonds are killing you—"
"And become someone else? Lose myself to the bond the way my mother was afraid of?" I shook my head, tears burning behind my eyes. "She said it felt like drowning—"
"Your mother's bond was with an alpha she hated," Jeni interrupted firmly, her dark eyes blazing with fierce protectiveness, her jaw set with determination. "An alpha who wanted to cage her and control her. That's not the same thing. You don't know what kind of alphas they are."
"Exactly. I don't know them." My voice cracked on the words. "How am I supposed to trust five strangers with my soul?"
Jeni was quiet for a moment, her thumbs tracing circles on the table's worn surface, the silver of her rings catching the light with each small movement.
The café noise swelled around us — the hiss of the espresso machine, the clatter of cups, the murmur of conversations — before fading again as she gathered her thoughts.
"You can't trust them yet," she admitted finally, her voice soft but unwavering, steady as bedrock beneath shifting sand.
"Trust is earned, not given. But Keira — running is killing you.
Literally killing you. And breaking the bonds would be suicide.
" She reached across and took my hands again, her cool fingers wrapping around my fevered ones, squeezing tightly enough to hurt.
"You need to stop running long enough to find out who they actually are.
Not who you're afraid they might be. Who they are. "
"If they're terrible?" I asked, voicing the fear that had driven every step of my flight. "If they're exactly what my mother's soulmate was?"
"Then you deal with that when you have actual information instead of borrowed fears," Jeni said firmly, her eyes never leaving mine. "Right now, you're killing yourself to avoid a future you invented based on your mother's experience with a completely different alpha."
She paused, her expression softening as she looked at me — really looked, past the fear and exhaustion and the walls I'd spent so long building.
"Your mother chose to break her bond because she didn't want it.
She looked at her soulmate and saw a cage.
" Jeni's voice dropped to barely above a whisper, intimate and urgent.
"But maybe you could look at yours and see something different.
You won't know until you actually look."
I wanted to argue. Wanted to explain why she was wrong, why the danger was real.I was so tired.
So scared. So sick of carrying this weight alone.
Some part of me — the part that had felt those bonds trigger, that had felt warmth and completion before the fear drowned it out — whispered that maybe Jeni had a point.
"They're going to find me," I admitted quietly, the words feeling like surrender. "The other three. Pack bonds are drawn together. Sooner or later, the remaining bonds will trigger whether I want them to or not."
"Then stop running and start preparing," Jeni suggested gently, her thumb brushing across my knuckles in slow, soothing strokes. "Figure out what you want. What your limits are. So when they find you, you're making a choice instead of just reacting."
A choice. My mother had made a choice — she'd broken her bond because being bonded to that particular alpha felt worse than dying. But that was her choice about her situation.
What if I made a different choice?
"I don't know if I can do this," I whispered, tears finally spilling down my cheeks. "I don't know if I'm strong enough."
"You're the strongest person I know," Jeni said firmly, releasing one hand to brush tears from my cheek with gentle fingers. "You can do this. You can write your own story."
My own story. Not my mother's tragedy repeated.
"I'm scared," I admitted, my voice barely audible.
"That's okay," Jeni murmured softly, her eyes bright with tears of her own. "Being scared doesn't mean you can't be brave too."
I sat there for a long moment, tears streaming, my best friend's hands warm in mine. Somewhere beneath the fear, something else was stirring. Something that felt almost like hope.
We can do this, my omega whispered. We don't have to be her.
"Okay," I said finally, my voice rough with tears. "I'll try. I'll try to stop running."
Jeni smiled, watery but genuine. "One step at a time."
One step at a time.
I could do that.
Maybe.