Chapter 23
23
There was a tapping on the door. Lucie opened her eyes and found her room in darkness. She sat up abruptly, glanced at her phone and saw that it was almost 7.30p.m. She’d lost almost two hours.
‘Mum?’ She heard her daughter’s voice on the other side of the door.
‘Hi, Zoe… door’s open.’
Zoe stepped in as Lucie sat up and smoothed out her hair.
‘Dinner over?’ Lucie asked.
‘Yup… and the speeches too. Very gushy. I’m glad you didn’t have to hear all that.’ Zoe smiled. ‘So now the happy couple are about to get their photos taken on the wedding swing and then Deva is going to sing for their first dance. I didn’t think you’d want to miss all that.’
‘Oh, no, definitely not!’
Lucie stood up. ‘Hang on a few minutes, let me do a little refresh in the mirror,’ she said, scouting about for her hairbrush, lipstick and mascara.
‘How are you doing?’ she asked Zoe as she applied her fresh coating of makeup. ‘Having fun? Or pretty tired?’
‘Both,’ Zoe decided. ‘But Dad and Jacasta look very happy and it’s nice to catch up with so many people. So I’m pushing on through. There was coffee at the end of the meal, so that helped.’
‘And how about Rafi? Have you been in touch with him?’ Lucie asked, but gently, suspecting it was sensitive ground.
A look seemed to pass over Zoe’s face.
‘Is everything OK?’ Lucie asked.
‘I hope everything’s OK,’ Zoe began. ‘I’ve just not had any reply from him all day, which is not like him,’ she added. Then she quickly followed this with, ‘I’m sure everything’s fine.’
‘Don’t worry yourself,’ Lucie reassured her while feeling her own familiar burst of worry that Zoe was worried, and who was this guy anyway? And how dare he make her daughter feel anxious about anything at all at this late stage in her pregnancy.
‘Right,’ she said, setting a cheerful smile in place, ‘let’s go support Deva and find out all about wedding swings.’
In the garden, they found flowers, more flowers, and now lanterns, subtle outdoor lighting, scented candles and guests milling about in the glow of the marquee.
Knots of people had gathered around this elaborate double swing, its ropes all festooned with flowers and greenery.
Miles and Jacasta were sitting side by side on the swing, one arm around each other, one arm holding a rope as the photographer bounced about beside them snapping away.
‘And look into her eyes… and Jacasta, slightly to the left… and chin up just a little… Perfect, hold it there… Now looking over to me…’
Both were smiling, apparently enjoying this whole ludicrous performance. A swing ? Lucie couldn’t help thinking, weren’t they a little old to get excited about swings .
But as most people seemed to be enjoying the performance, she took the chance to snag another glass of fizz from a passing waiter, then stole glances around the audience. There was no point in kidding herself; she was definitely looking for Clark. So he’s married. That doesn’t mean I can’t catch up with him, be friends with him again… does it? Having an old friend like Clark back in her life would be a start, wouldn’t it?
She scanned the faces and just as she thought she couldn’t locate him, there he was. His back to her, his arm around one of the women he was with; she couldn’t tell from here which one. And now, the sharp feeling of being all alone, and on the edge of it all, swept over her.
She took a deep swig from her glass, turned her attention back to Miles, Jacasta and the swing, and quite honestly wanted to laugh out loud at this pantomime. Instead, she brought out her phone, set it to record video and held it up at the scene. Maybe in ten years’ time, when Miles and Jacasta had split acrimoniously, she could play this back to him and remind him what an absolute tit he’d made of himself at this over-the-top wedding.
She wondered whether Miles and Jacasta would have children. She tried to picture her fifty-six-year-old ex changing a dirty nappy. He’d never been the keenest on baby tasks the first time around. Was Zoe’s baby soon going to have a playmate who would technically be her aunt or uncle? Lucie really didn’t know whether to sigh or giggle at that thought.
She looked back at the couple on the swing and for a moment thought one of the ropes looked a little longer than the other. She had barely registered this thought when the right-hand rope came fully loose and slapped hard onto the ground, very quickly followed by Jacasta and then Miles on top.
For a moment, the entire audience gasped and stood frozen with shock, taking in the heavy grunts, cries and waving arms and legs from the tangled heap of bride and groom in front of them, then there was a surge of the people at the front rushing to help.
As first Miles was helped to his feet, and then Jacasta was pulled up from where she’d been crushed underneath him, it was clear that there may be some pain, scrapes and bruises, but both were thankfully unharmed.
Lucie quickly clicked off her phone recording but couldn’t quite tear her eyes from the scene as Miles went from feeling shocked to finding the whole thing pretty funny. He began smiling and, once he was sure Jacasta was alright, he began to properly laugh. Meanwhile, Jacasta was examining her bouquet, which had taken a serious crushing, and her dress, which now had an obvious green grass mark on the side, and she was looking as if she was suffering a serious sense of humour failure.
As Miles tried to take her arm, she pulled it away from him. Then she dumped the crushed and mangled bouquet onto the grass and stomped off across the lawn, the wedding girls clustering around her in sympathy.
Once the girls had made off in the direction of the house, Miles went up to a group of his closest friends, knocked back a glass of wine and began to roar with laughter. Much of the wedding audience took their cue from him and all the pent-up humour in the situation was released. Almost everywhere you looked now people were creased up with laughter and… oh dear, comparing their videos of the moment and laughing all over again.
Across the crowd, Lucie caught sight of Zoe, who met her eye too. Zoe wasn’t laughing; in fact, Zoe rolled her eyes, scowled and then hurried towards her dad. After a few moments of conversation – which looked a little like Zoe ticking her dad off – Miles headed off across the lawn, hopefully to find Jacasta and help her recover from this ordeal.
Only when Miles had left the scene and Lucie could see Zoe heading towards her, only then did Lucie allow herself a smile at it all.
‘Well done,’ Lucie told her daughter once she was within earshot. ‘You’re quite right to send Miles off after her. I mean, poor her, coming off the swing in front of everyone, crushing her flowers, staining her dress, not to mention having Miles land on top of her…’
Zoe seemed to be struggling with her face… She was clearly trying to keep a calm and sympathetic expression in place, but now there was an unmistakable twitching at the corners of her mouth and crinkling round her eyes.
‘It was bloody funny though,’ Zoe said finally, allowing herself a broad smile but no actual laughter. ‘Please tell me you’ve got it on video.’
Lucie just tapped her phone and gave Zoe a knowing look.
‘I would replay it to check,’ Lucie said, ‘but there’s too much risk that Jacasta will hear me laughing in her bridal suite on the other side of the maison.’
Zoe tried not to giggle, but had to give in.
‘Oh… don’t think I’m being mean, please. I wish them the best, I really do,’ Lucie tried to explain. ‘I’m getting over being furious with your dad and one day in the future I’m sure we’ll all be friends. But for now, I’m allowed to laugh because he is still a bit of a tit and I can’t help feeling that she is going to keep him on his toes and give as good as she gets.’
‘That’s fair enough,’ Zoe decided, before adding, ‘And what about Deva? Have you seen him? I thought his song was coming up next.’
‘No, but we could go and look around for him. And what about you, have you heard from Rafi yet?’
Zoe paused for a moment, as if she wasn’t quite sure what to tell her mother. Then she decided on: ‘Only a quick message saying stand by, he will be in touch very soon, which is a bit mysterious. Sounds as if he might have some news.’
Please let it be good, Lucie thought to herself.
The tables in the marquee had been pushed to the side and the lighting dimmed. The keyboard player and violinist were back, along with a DJ with full equipment. The bar was set up at the back and of course everything looked stunning. Flowers – check, low and careful lighting – check, actual wafting scent – check, projection of lovely photographs and arty images – check. Thank God for the swing moment, Lucie couldn’t help thinking; this perfect bloody wedding had to have some hiccups.
She decided to refresh her drink and as she made for the bar, she stopped to say some brief hellos to familiar faces. As she was talking to one former business friend, over the woman’s shoulder, she caught sight of Clark. Then he saw her and their eyes made contact. It momentarily stopped her in her tracks. She lost the thread of what she’d been saying to the acquaintance and stumbled over her next sentence.
Now Clark was completely filling her thoughts. In that one look, she remembered so many things about him. How funny he could be but also how serious when required. And how calm and unflappable, whatever was going on around them. Five years older than her, when she was in her early twenties, he’d seemed like the best possible grown up. The kind of man you wanted to marry, have children with, hope your son grew up into.
Was he still all of those things? What had happened to him over the years? How had life changed him? Was he still the same kind of man with the same kind of values? She realised she was quite desperate to know. Still, the woman she was with kept on talking and she could see that Clark had moved on to another conversation. But when she looked over in his direction once more, she saw his eyes move towards her again and he gave a slight nod, which she took to mean that he’d seen her and they must talk some more. Even the thought of that made her heart jump and some sort of blush or flush travel from her collarbone up across her cheeks.
‘My lovely guests!’ Miles was heading towards the raised dais. ‘I hope you’re all enjoying yourselves.’
There were cheers of approval in reply to this.
‘Bet you can’t wait to start dancing and letting what’s left of your hair down.’
Another cheer, along with a heckle of ‘Especially the over sixties!’
‘So, before we let rip with the DJ, my wife, Jacasta…’
Amidst the cheers that followed this, Lucie couldn’t help thinking how odd it was to hear Miles say ‘my wife’ and then follow it up with another woman’s name. In fact, she thought she’d heard his momentary pause as he checked himself to make absolutely sure he didn’t automatically say the wrong name. Old habits die hard, after all.
‘Jacasta and I are going to open the dancing to our song. So step forward, Jacasta!’ Miles announced.
Jacasta emerged from the side of the stage in a different dress. This one was lacier and a better cut for dancing than the column dress. Her hair and makeup had been retouched and there was a corsage of wedding flowers on her shoulder and on one of her wrists. She was young, beautiful, full of energy and ambition. Miles had landed so much more than he deserved, Lucie thought.
Maybe people had thought the same of her when she’d married him. And she felt jolted by that. She couldn’t bring back her youth or the beauty she’d had in her twenties and thirties, but she’d allowed her energy, ambition and focus to slide over recent years. She’d felt beaten down by what had happened and she’d retreated. Whereas Miles had been through the worst, picked himself up and set his sights on a whole new chapter. And that’s what she needed to do too.
As the music for the opening dance began to play, Zoe appeared at Lucie’s side.
‘And let’s welcome my nephew, Deva, up here,’ Miles went on. ‘He’s going to sing this absolutely perfect song, which was playing the night I met Jacasta.’ Then he gathered Jacasta into his arms and they stepped onto the dancefloor together, all broad smiles, eye contact and, Lucie suspected, carefully rehearsed steps.
Her eyes moved from the Happy Couple to Deva, who stepped up onto the dais, took hold of the microphone, and positively shimmered under the dimmed, twinkly lights, in another head-to-toe black lace Chanel dress even lovelier than the one he’d worn to sing to the mountaintops. His shining hair slicked into a smoothed approximation of a very short Chanel bob.
And the voice, the voice that emerged now, that brought all the emotion to every note, that wrung everything out of each word of ‘Eternal Flame’, this was the voice that had rung out over the hillside and echoed into the sunset.
Zoe and Lucie looked at one another, and Lucie felt a little shivery tingle pass down her spine.
He was just so good. She took a quick glance around the audience to see if everyone was as bowled over, as spellbound, as she thought they should be. And yes, it did look as if everyone in the room had come to a surprised standstill. Yes, he was definitely bringing everyone to their knees with this song.
Soon, other couples were making their way onto the dancefloor. And Deva was hitting the higher notes, ramping up the emotion and knocking it right out of the park. Oh yes… prompted by the words of the song, we could all feel his heart beating , we did all understand .
Lucie could feel the tightness of emotion in her throat and it was certainly not caused by the sight of Miles and Jacasta making puppy eyes at one another. This was a glorious song, and not appropriate for Miles. How could he dance to ‘Eternal Flame’ after twenty-five years of marriage to someone else, the silly arse. She put Miles out of her mind and turned her attention back to Deva, who was spreading his arms wide for the finale, giving it all to them: all the sound, all the song, all the heart came right down into the microphone and flowed out over the audience.
Did they understand? Did they feel the same? Or was he only dreaming…
The words of this song seemed so perfect and so personal to Deva, as he stood there in front of them in the dress by his beloved Chanel. He just wanted to be heard and understood.
She could feel tears of emotion pricking at the back of her eyes.
When he’d sung his final note, there was a pause as it reverberated around the tent and then long, loud appreciative claps and cheers from the audience as he took his bow.
But what Lucie noticed as she watched Deva come off-stage, glowing and grinning with the effort and the appreciation, was that he went up to his mother, Melissa, but her face looked angry. She appeared to say sharp words to him, then she turned on her heel and walked away, right out of the tent.