19. Chapter 19
Chapter 19
Juniper
T he steam welcomed me to the bathtub as I sank in, and I sighed to myself in relief as the hot water turned my body pink. The smell of the lavender candle wafted over to me as I covered myself shamelessly with the bubbles infused with CBD and lavender to match the candle. Nothing came quite this close to making my skin feel this soft, though it was for the pain relief in my leg that I bathed.
My phone, resting on the lip of the tub, buzzed moments later. I picked it up and saw a text from Rachel.
Rachel: Can I come over?
I’m in the bath, but sure. Sasquatch can let you in, I’ve taught him to open doors.
Rachel: Sweet! Be right over!
Rachel: You didn’t strike me as a bath kind of guy.
Sue me. It’s relaxing.
As I set my phone back down, I heard a knocking at the door. “Can you get the door, Squatch?”
With happy pants, Sasquatch trotted over to the door, stood on his hind legs, and then pushed down on the handle. I heard the door open and Rachel call him a good boy in that baby voice she used with him. Even I had to admit it had grown on me.
Rachel giggled at me as she turned the corner into the bathroom where I’d left the door cracked in case I needed Sasquatch. I suppose the sight of me in the bathtub, covered in bubbles, with a candle lit on the sink counter, made me appear quite the contrarian.
“For what it’s worth, I got in not even ten minutes ago, so I’m not moving.”
“Is there room for two, then?”
“Probably, yeah. Come on in. Though, let me warn you: water’s hot as hell. I’m not satisfied until I’m thoroughly cooked.”
“I could stand to warm my bones, anyway.” Rachel undressed and took her time folding her clothes before moving them to the bedroom next door. She came back in finally bare, gooseflesh already forming on her skin. I couldn’t take my eyes off her, all soft curves and smooth skin exposed for me. As she stepped in, I spread my legs, making room for her.
“Come here,” I said. “With your back to me.”
She did as I suggested. The water swayed with her body until it stilled on the surface. I brushed her hair over one shoulder, feeling the coils around my finger. Then, I placed my hands on her shoulders to massage where I felt the tension and knots near her neck. Rachel let out a delightful, small mewl.
“What a pleasant surprise.”
“You work your ass off. It’s the least I could do.”
“I see why you like this so much.”
I couldn’t stop my smile even if I tried. I wasn’t sure exactly when I’d stopped resisting—if it was when we were stuck in that luxury cabin or all the way back when we watched shitty movies together over Halloween, or maybe somewhere in between—but all I knew was that, here with her, I was happier than I’d been in a long time.
“What did you want to talk to me about?”
“What happened the other day.” She let out a little grunt as I dug my thumb against a knot wedged between her neck and shoulder, rubbing small circles against it. “Fuck, that feels good.”
“Probably doesn’t come as much of a surprise, but I hate the press.”
“They’ve got a lot of chutzpah to be that pushy, so, no. Not a surprise at all.”
“You know what’s sad? You’re the only person who I think my life and my secrets are actually safe with. My family doesn’t get it, which is why I haven’t bothered to tell them, and past friends have all sold me out. It’s…” I sighed. “It sucks.”
“Wait. What?”
Now that I’d started, the words spilled freely, as if they’d waited for this very moment to leave my mouth all at once. “Guess I never told you. Four years ago, when I got in my accident? Well, my then-girlfriend and someone I thought was a close friend took photos of me in the hospital and sold them to the paparazzi.”
“What the fuck?”
“Yeah, that’s what I said.”
“Where are they? Listen, I’m not afraid to become the next Florida woman headline.”
To my surprise, I laughed. “They got together not long after that. To be honest, I think they were together before that, too, but that’s beside the point.”
“Shit. That’s awful.”
“It’s fine, really. What’s in the past is in the past.” I swallowed. “But those photos made the media frenzy around my accident so much worse than it needed to be. And I just… I felt so violated.”
Rachel craned her neck to look at me, amber eyes wide. The bubbles from the bath covered her body in splotches as I moved my hands down to the spot between her spine and shoulder blades. “That’s awful. You’ve been through so much, Juni.”
“Yeah, well, that’s why I don’t bother talking to them. Every single time they run an article about me, this fucking photo of me high as a kite on pain meds in nothing but a hospital gown shows up. It makes me want to vomit.”
“I’m glad you told me.” Rachel didn’t look away from me as she asked, “Do you trust me?”
Without hesitation, I said, “You’re the only person I trust. Well, you and Sasquatch.”
“I worked my magic yesterday with them. I’m confident it worked. Let me do my thing and go into marketing mode, okay? I can spin this into something beautiful. No more hospital photos involved.”
I knew without a shadow of a doubt she could. For someone who went from normal life to fame by association overnight, she was handling it with a grace I couldn’t comprehend. Not only had she struck back with a diversion that subtly reminded everyone who she was at the lodge, but she even trolled the tabloids with that Halloween photo, getting them talking and overthinking. How she didn’t panic, I didn’t know. I envied her ability to not give a shit, to roll things off without a care, and to act instead of becoming paralyzed with fear. She’d once told me that being here and surrounded by nature instead of cubicle walls and computer screens allowed her to return to her true self.
If she could do it, I could, too.
“If anyone can, it’s you.”
She smiled as she faced forward again, allowing herself to relax into the massage once more. “It’ll all work out. They’ll learn quickly they won’t have access to anything if they run that photo.”
“And what about you? Are you worried about what they’ll say?”
“Not at all. Let them call me your ski bunny. It’s kind of cute.”
“That’s usually not the intention.”
“Well, it all comes down to what we make of it. If I say it’s cute, it’s cute. If they’re gonna get all misogynistic, then we don’t wanna work with them, anyway.”
“Are you sure it doesn’t bother you?”
“I’ve got you, Juni, and I love this place. I’m sure.”
Her words sent something through my chest—pride, admiration, love, I wasn’t sure.
“I couldn’t do this without you, Rachel. Any of it. I hope you know that.”
“So, you’re going to stop acting all aloof with me now, right?”
“You got me there. But I mean it.”
“I know. That was a cheap shot. Sorry.”
I chuckled as I moved my hands forward, fingers creeping toward her chest. As they rested on her ribs, I asked, “Want me to make it up to you?”
Once she nodded, I cupped her breasts in my hands, lifting and kneading them in a massage. She hummed as she leaned back against me, sliding a bit in the tub so her head could rest against my shoulder. “You don’t realize how much your boobs hurt your back until all the weight gets taken off your shoulders.”
I chuckled. “Anything to make you feel good, Rach. You deserve it.”
Her nipples peaked between my middle and index fingers as a soft sigh of pleasure passed her lips. When combined with the feel of her supple, plush skin beneath my palms, it was enough to make me stiffen beneath her.
Life was too short to pretend I didn’t feel this way about her, and that I couldn’t help but cling to her like a magnet. I yearned for Rachel like the snow outside yearned to fall. I crept one of my hands down her body, dragging some suds along the way as I reached one of her thighs. She whimpered again, practically putty in my grip as I matched the rhythm of my kneading on her thigh to her chest. My fingertips ghosted over her groin. “Does that feel good, sweetheart?”
She moaned in response as I gripped her tighter. Nothing was easier on the eyes than the sight of her unraveling at my touch. As my fingers dipped between her legs, she sighed in pleasure, having lost her words as she reached for my own thigh.
“Don’t worry about me right now, okay?” I dipped my head to plant a kiss on her neck. “We’ve got all evening, and while this tub is spacious, it’s not that big.”
She seemed to get the hint I wasn’t confident this would be the most comfortable spot to escalate things, but the water was still warm, and I wanted to take my time with her. I didn’t withdraw my fingers from her until the water lost its heat entirely, and once we emerged, blew out the candle, and dried off, neither of us bothered to get dressed.
Rachel wasted no time pinning me down to my bed. The ends of her reddish-brown curls stuck to her collarbones, still damp from the bath, but it didn’t stop me from running my fingers along her scalp beneath her ears as I leaned up and kissed her, desperate for her to be as close to me as another human could be. When she lowered herself onto me, my hair billowed behind me as my head hit the pillow. I cursed, lost in the feeling of her and the lingering smell of the lavender candle.
“Damn, Rach. You feel so good. So, so good.”
To my surprise, Rachel slipped off as soon as I’d entered her. I groaned, a kneejerk reaction. She rubbed against me to tease me as she reached for the bedside table. She fumbled for a condom, and once the packet was in her hands, I ripped it open and slid it on so we could resume. I’d never felt this needy for someone, this desperate. On one hand, it scared the shit out of me. On the other, any fears left my mind when she resumed riding me. Everything about this, about her , felt too right for me to care.
When her moan sounded more like my name, my cock twitched inside of her. My ego inflated from the way her eyes closed and head tipped back. “That’s right. Say my name.”
“Juniper.”
“Louder.” I squeezed her hips and relished in how plush they felt in my hands. “We won’t have this place to ourselves forever. Say my fucking name. It sounds good on your lips.”
To my delight, she complied.
“That’s my good girl.”
I’d heard crowds of thousands scream and chant my name. That didn’t hold a candle to Rachel.
My hands roamed her body, caressing up to admire her curves. I couldn’t get enough of her. When I thrust my hips up, she pressed her hands on my chest, and said, “Let me take care of you. It’s okay.”
Fuck, if that didn’t make my heart melt. It took everything in me not to cum from her words alone. Even after she’d proven how much she cared, how reliable she was, part of me still struggled to accept help.
But I trusted Rachel. So, I let her bring us both to the peak of pleasure.
After we freshened up, we returned to my bed without bothering to redress. Overwhelmed with a feeling I wasn’t ready to name yet, I pulled her into me as soon as she lifted herself off me again. Between the warm bath and the warmth of her, I’d never felt more comfortable in my life. I wrapped my arms around her from behind, wanting to permanently be her big spoon. As I kissed her temple, I asked against her skin, “Stay?”
She craned her neck to look at me with a smile on her face as she said, “Of course.”
Silence fell over the room, but it was comfortable. There was no pressure for either of us to perform, for me to be the pro-athlete or for her to be the corporate superstar. Like this, we could simply exist, and it would be enough. We fell asleep in each other’s arms, limbs tangled as my right leg hooked around her waist. There was no place I’d rather be.
She was still snug against me when I woke the following morning, the sunlight peeking through the cracks of my window to bring out the copper hues in her hair. As part of me wished to linger in this moment forever, I realized how much I cared for her.
I’d only known Rachel for nearly four months now, but I felt a tug toward her unlike anything I’d felt before. Even the way I’d been with my ex-girlfriend, who I’d been with for three years, couldn’t compete with this. Nothing I felt before this could qualify as love, not when my heart thrummed every time I was in the same room as her.
Not when I couldn’t picture my life without her in it anymore.
Rachel woke not long after I did, stretching in my arms before she opened her eyes. She turned and looked at me, kissing me with more passion than I expected first thing in the morning. Not that I was about to complain.
“Good morning to you too,” I said.
“Good morning. Did you sleep well?”
“Better than ever.” I kissed her forehead, incapable of voicing my thoughts just yet. I patted my right leg and said, “Sorry for trapping you again last night.”
She giggled. “It’s fine. I think it’s sweet.”
“Me? Sweet? Come on, Rach. I have a reputation to uphold.”
Sasquatch perked up at the rising sound of our voices. He jumped up from his spot in his dog bed and trotted over, leaping up. The mattress dipped beneath his weight until he nestled himself against Rachel’s back.
“I think my dog loves you more than me,” I said.
“Nonsense!” She laughed as she rolled onto her back so she could properly pet Sasquatch.
“It’s fine. I’ve already accepted the betrayal.”
“I could lie like this between the two of you forever.”
Her words hit me like a freight train straight to the chest. I wrapped an arm around her waist as I kissed her cheek. “Me too.”
What I really wanted to say were the three words I didn’t even remember speaking to anyone other than Sasquatch: I love you . But I didn’t dare—not now, even though I felt it coursing through my veins in a way that couldn’t be ignored, felt it in the way her fingers drew swirls in Sasquatch’s thick fur, and the way she rested her head on top of mine when I used her breast as a pillow, letting the soft thump of her heartbeat soothe me.
But I refrained in order to reduce my risk of sounding like a psychopath. Of the nearly four months I’d known her, we’d only started tolerating each other for three and been romantically involved for three and a half weeks. A month was too soon to declare love, especially the morning after what we could technically classify as makeup sex.
Yeah, because that would go over well right now.
A part of me, some hopeful chamber of my heart I hadn’t used in ages, thought Rachel would understand and when you know, you know. But if we were successful here, then we’d have plenty of time for me to sort through a heartfelt confession. And yet, when Rachel looked at me… no one had ever looked at me like that before, with genuine love in their heart that shone through their entire being. I wasn’t sure what she saw in me, but I couldn’t find any excuses for why else she’d look at me in that way.
The words bubbled in my throat but felt stuck. Before I could debate on if I should say them, Sasquatch stirred and pushed himself from the bed, off to drink some water.
Rachel said, “We should probably follow his lead and get ready for the day, huh?”
I groaned and tightened my grip on her waist, burying my face back into her chest. “Do we really have to? It’s Christmas Eve. No one’s doing shit today.”
“Valid point.”
“I haven’t had a morning like this in… I couldn’t even tell you how long.”
“Me neither.”
“So then, let’s just stay like this. Please.”
I wasn’t sure where my desperation came from, but I made no attempt to hide it. I was no longer worried about seeming needy or clingy. Rachel ran one of her hands through my hair and nodded her agreement, and it wasn’t long before the two of us drifted back to sleep. We spent the morning napping on-and-off until around eleven-thirty when we were too hungry to stay put and Sasquatch nudged at me so he could use the bathroom.
“Do you want to spend the day together?” I asked as she dressed in her outfit from last night, hoping Rachel would agree.
“Sure. I gotta run across the hall for some fresh clothes, though.”
“Oh, and Rach?”
“Hmm?”
“If anyone asks you what you are to me, you tell them you’re my girl. Not some fucking ski bunny.”
If the sun hadn’t been streaming in, her smile would have lit up the room. “I will, but don’t think I’m still not gonna try to reclaim that term.”
“I wouldn’t expect any less from you. Meet you in the lobby?”
“Sounds good.”
I kissed her once more before she left the room. The warmth that spread through me and my racing heart did not cease once she did. The feeling lingered, settling itself into me and taking root.
Once I’d taken my morning dose and thrown on a few layers, topping it off with a down jacket, I helped Sasquatch into his vest and boots and slid open my back patio door for him. The cold air rushed in with a light flurry of snow promising a white Christmas ahead. Sasquatch trotted out and back in quickly, fast to take care of business—something I was grateful for so I wouldn’t have to let the cold air in for long.
As I grabbed my phone, my blood chilled, comparable to the weather outside as I saw the text from my mother waiting for me. From the timestamp, she’d sent it four hours ago.
Mom: Merry Christmas my little Junebug! Your aunt got sick this year, so instead of going to her house, your father and I are on our way so we can celebrate with you at the lodge! See you soon!
I ran a hand over my face, already dreading their arrival. “Fuck. Come on, Squatch. We gotta warn Rachel.”