5. Kai
CHAPTER FIVE
Kai
She was here.
Sitting across from me like she hadn’t shattered me into a thousand pieces and left me to pick them up alone. Like she hadn’t disappeared without a goddamn trace.
I couldn’t breathe.
For a second, I thought I imagined it. Some cruel trick of my exhausted mind.
But no… Sadie Collins was real.
Sitting at our table. In our store. Like she belonged here.
Adam was talking. Something about hiring her. Her résumé. Her experience. The fact that we needed the help.
I didn’t care.
All I could hear was the sound of my own blood pounding in my ears.
Sadie Collins.
Back in Medford.
Back in my life.
And the worst part?
She still had the power to undo me.
Samuel hadn’t said much, but I’d seen his hands curl into fists under the table. Seen the way he looked at her… like he recognized something in her that I didn’t understand.
And I’d seen the way she refused to look back at him.
A sharp pain twisted in my stomach. I hated the way it felt. The way it mattered .
I should have shut it down. Should have told Adam no. Should have walked away before she had the chance to hurt me again.
But I didn’t.
Because, despite everything, despite the years, despite the fact that she left me in the wreckage of our past, I still knew her. I knew she was good at this work. I knew she could bake. I knew she could handle pressure.
We’d spent plenty a Sunday afternoon baking when we were younger, planning on doing more of it in our future.
And it seemed like she really needed this job.
So, despite myself, I said nothing.
But the moment the day ended and there was no more work to do, I pushed out the back door and into the cold early evening air, barely holding myself together.
I walked.
Didn’t think, didn’t stop, just moved .
And somehow, ten minutes later, I was standing in front of the house she used to call home.
It looked different. Smaller. The white paint peeling, the porch swing hanging lopsided. The lace curtains in the front window were still there, but yellowed, edges curling.
My chest ached, emotions deep and sharp twisting in my ribs. I dragged a hand down my face, forcing a slow breath, but it didn’t help.
Because I saw her here.
Not now, not with time and distance between us… but then.
Sadie, at sixteen, peering around those lace curtains, searching for me the second she heard the rumble of my bike pulling up out front.
She always knew when I was coming. Always waiting.
And when she saw me, her whole damn face would light up.
God, that look .
Like I was the best part of her day. Like nothing else mattered but us.
I used to live for it.
I’d barely be off the bike before she was bounding down the front steps, her feet bare, a grin splitting her face as she ran to me.
Jumped into my arms like she had no doubt I’d catch her.
And I always did.
She’d press her face into my neck, laughing as I spun her around. And then she’d pull back, breathless, and look at me like I was her whole damn world.
She made me feel invincible .
Like I could have given her anything.
Like I was everything.
And now… now I could barely stand in front of this house without feeling like I was about to be swallowed whole.
Because she wasn’t waiting behind that curtain.
There was no light in the window.
No girl on the front steps, breathless and eager to throw herself into my arms.
Just a hollowed-out version of what used to be.
I clenched my jaw, my hands balling into fists at my sides.
I thought I was over her. I’d spent years convincing myself I was.
But standing here, staring at this place, feeling the ghost of her pressed against my chest like she never left?
I wasn’t so sure anymore.
A muscle ticked in my jaw. My chest felt tight, too tight.
I still remembered standing here the night she packed up to leave me forever.
Waiting. Hoping. Praying she’d change her mind.
I had prayed she’d run back to me. Say she couldn’t do it. That we’d figure it out together.
But she never did.
I still heard the sound of her car pulling away in my worst fucking dreams.
A sharp crunch of gravel behind me.
I knew that sound.
I stiffened.
Then… her voice.
“Kai?”
Everything in me locked up.
I turned, slow, like if I moved too fast, she’d vanish.
She didn’t.
Sadie stood a few feet away, arms wrapped around herself like she was bracing for impact. Loose strands of her dark hair caught in the wind.
She looked the same. And completely different.
Her eyes met mine, and I felt my insides crack.
“What are you doing here?” she breathed out.
I swallowed. “Could ask you the same thing, S.”
Her lips parted slightly. I saw the flicker of recognition at the old nickname. The way her throat bobbed when she swallowed.
But she recovered quick, forcing a small smile. “I’m staying with Hayley. Thank God she still loves me enough to take me in.”
I huffed out a laugh. But it wasn’t funny.
She shifted, shoving her hands into her pockets.
“You…” She hesitated. Then, quieter, “Never mind.”
“No.” My voice was rough. “Say it.”
She inhaled sharply. “I didn’t know you owned The Foundry.” Her gaze dropped. “I wouldn’t have come in if I’d known. I wouldn’t have…”
Hurt you.
The words were unspoken, but I heard them anyway.
My jaw clenched.
I should’ve told her to leave. Should’ve said I didn’t need her here, screwing up the life I’d built without her.
But I didn’t.
Instead, I met her gaze and told the truth.
“I know.”
Sadie exhaled, nodding slightly, like she’d been expecting that answer.
I hated that she understood me that well.
I shoved my hands into my pockets. “Walk with me.”
She hesitated. But after a beat, she nodded.
Medford was quiet at this hour, the last traces of sunset bleeding behind the trees. It was my favorite time of day.
We passed Page Turners, the bookstore we used to sneak into after school, hiding between the shelves, making plans for a future we never got to have.
“Remember when Old Man George caught us making out in the poetry section?” she murmured.
I huffed a laugh. “Thought he was gonna ban us for life.”
“I thought he was gonna kill us.”
We walked past the park, where we spent whole summers stretched out on blankets, dreaming about places we’d never been.
She slowed by the swings, staring out at them like they held ghosts.
“I used to think we’d never leave,” she said softly.
I swallowed. “Yeah?”
She nodded. “Then I realized staying wasn’t an option.”
My stomach twisted.
Because back then, I didn’t get it.
I thought I was enough. Thought we were enough.
But Medford had ghosts she couldn’t live with.
And now? Now I wasn’t sure if coming back would save her or destroy her all over again.
Silence stretched between us.
Then she turned, tilting her head. “Do you regret it?”
I frowned. “Regret what?”
“Us.” Her voice was quiet. “Loving me.”
A sucker punch to the ribs.
I could have lied. Could have said I moved on.
But I hadn’t. Not for a single goddamn second. Even when I thought I had.
“No,” I said, voice rough. “Never.”
She swallowed, her fingers curling around the rusted swing chain. “I didn’t leave because I wanted to hurt you.”
I let out a slow breath. “I don’t know what I know anymore, S.” I looked at her, my heart pounding. “You were my whole damn world. And then you were gone.”
She squeezed her eyes shut for half a second. “I was just eighteen, Kai. I didn’t know how to stay.”
“That’s bullshit.”
Her head snapped up, eyes flashing. “No, it’s not.”
“You left because you wanted a new life.”
“I left because I was scared ,” she cut in sharply. “Because I thought if I stayed, I’d ruin everything. That one day, you’d wake up and realize I wasn’t worth it. That you would leave me too. Because that’s all Medford was to me—loss. The place I came when I lost everything, and…”
My chest ached as her words trailed off.
“You never would’ve lost me,” I said, my voice softer now.
She let out a hollow laugh. “People leave, Kai. That’s what they do.”
“Not me.”
She looked up at me then. Eyes raw. Haunted.
I hated that I still loved her.
And that scared the hell out of me.