22. Tori
22
TORI
After the meeting with my advisor, I walked slowly across campus to the parking lot Kyle used. I didn’t want to think about my mom, and I sure as hell didn’t want to think about Doug.
Instead, I replayed the baseball game in my mind, focusing on the fun parts. Laughing with Jayden in the stands. Seeing Kyle run the bases and do that very cool flip as his teammates congratulated him.
I hadn’t seen him since the game yesterday. The team had probably spent the rest of the afternoon and evening celebrating. I was already in bed when I heard him come home. Whenever I heard him in the other bedroom, it felt kind of intimate. Like the wall separating us might somehow come down.
I liked being in the house with Lucas and Jayden too, but Lucas slept out in the living room, and I couldn’t hear him from the bed. Jayden had set up an air mattress in the basement. Sometime this week, he and Kyle were going to go get the queen bed he’d put into storage at the beginning of the summer.
The basement was by no means finished, but after some hard work over the weekend, there was enough space for him down there. Now we just had to find a place for Lucas to sleep. I’d tried to get him to take his room back many times, but he turned the offer down every single time. Even when things were a little awkward between us. It was baffling.
As I neared the parking lot, laughter came from my right, and I saw a group of students just outside the Economics building. There were four guys and two women. Kyle was right in the middle of the group.
I stilled, feeling a little bashful. The other guys talking and joking with him were tall and muscled. I had a feeling they were on the team, too, though I didn’t recognize any of them. They’d kind of all looked the same in their uniforms yesterday, except for Kyle.
The two women were pretty—one a blonde, and one a redhead. The blonde hung on the arm of a tall guy with light brown hair. And the redhead was standing close to Kyle, touching his arm and laughing with him.
My stomach sank. Did he have a girlfriend? I’d never thought to ask. It was okay if he did, but just seeing the way she was looking at him—and the way he was looking back at her—was a bit of a shock. Was she perhaps the reason why he’d never followed up on that date he’d made me agree to?
She laughed at something he said, and she placed her palm lightly on his flat stomach. I knew how sculpted his muscles were, and my fingers ached to touch him.
Kyle clearly wasn’t looking for me—I wasn’t even sure he remembered I existed—but I ducked behind the edge of the building, anyway. There was a tree in front of me, and it was a good place to see but not be seen.
I shook my head, chiding myself. I wasn’t a stalker. There was no reason I couldn’t just walk up to Kyle. He’d offered to drive me, after all. But it was too intimidating with his good-looking friends all there, talking loudly and laughing.
And with the redhead who appeared to be hanging on his every word.
After a few minutes, the vibe changed in the group, and it was clear they were saying goodbye. I felt relieved for reasons I couldn’t quite identify. Or perhaps didn’t want to identify.
I waited for a few moments after his friends walked off, the redhead going with them, thankfully.
Kyle scanned the area, hopefully looking for me. My plan was to pop out when he was facing the other direction, so that it didn’t look like I’d been spying—even though I had been.
But that plan went up in flames when I spotted something else flame colored. The redhead had circled back.
Crap.
She called his name, and he turned, one eyebrow raised in that arrogant way of his. It was a look I knew well. The redhead sidled up against him and slid her arm around his waist. Kyle’s went around her shoulder. She angled toward him, her face tilted up, inches from him.
Were they going to kiss? If so, I didn’t want to see that. But I somehow couldn’t look away. She reached her free hand up and grasped the hand he had slung over her shoulders, basically assuring he wasn’t going to let her go anytime soon. How did she know how to do that? Or how to gaze at him with such intensity. If it had been me, I would’ve flushed and looked away by now.
They looked good together. Comfortable. Lucas had always hinted that Kyle would go after any woman, and it seemed like maybe it was true. Then again, I didn’t know their history and how serious he was about her.
My stomach twisted in knots, and I wondered if I should just text Jayden or Lucas to see if they were still on campus. Kyle was clearly occupied. I’d spent so much of the past week or two sneaking peeks at him that I could read his body language pretty— Wait.
I squinted, trying to ignore the redhead and just focus on him. His face. His tall, ripped body. On the surface he looked like his normal cocky self. Shoulders back. Chin up. The ever-present smirk.
But he was tense. The signs were subtle but there. His free hand clutched the strap of his backpack tightly, his knuckles white. His shoulders were slightly raised. And mostly importantly, he had his body, his feet, angled away from her. Or as much as she would let him—she was clinging to him like a barnacle.
Maybe they weren’t together, although the redhead hadn’t gotten the message.
I slipped out of my hiding spot without conscious thought and walked toward them.
“There you are! I thought you’d stood me up.” I gave a light, breezy laugh as if that couldn’t possibly be the case.
“Never,” he said. There was a question in his eyes, but he seemed ready to go with the flow. It actually reminded me of how he looked on the field when he played shortstop. He’d stand between second and third looking ready to pivot in either direction in a split second.
I paused a few feet away. “You’re still hungry, right? I’ve been dreaming about sushi all day.”
“Yeah, I’m hungry all right.” The direct look he gave me made my pulse spike, but I tried to look casual.
“Who’s your friend?” I purposefully asked him, not even looking at her.
“Jasmine,” he said. Then he looked down at her as if he’d forgotten that she was glued to his side. “And this is Tori.”
“Hi,” Jasmine said, but since she wouldn’t tear her gaze away from Kyle, it sounded as if it was directed at him.
“Nice to meet you, Jasmine.” Jasmine . Of course she was named something sexy like that. But I was glad Kyle had introduced me as Tori. The full version of my name sounded so old-fashioned… except it somehow sounded hot the way Kyle often said it.
“Are you ready?” It was more of a demand than a question—as if I was used to him catering to my whims and needs. I wasn’t, but it sure as hell was a nice fantasy. I’d never really played the femme fatale. It was too bad I’d put my hair back in a ponytail after it had been so unruly before. That was pretty much the only feature I felt confident about.
Kyle extracted his arm or tried to. Jasmine went up on her toes and angled toward his firm lips. Was she actually going in for a kiss? Right in front of his fake girlfriend?
It sure looked like she was, but Kyle swung his arm over her head, bringing it down between them so that she had to move her head back. Then he stepped away, shouldering his pack. “I’ll see you in class, Jas. Sorry to run, but I have plans.” The look he gave me made me glad that his plans involved me… even if they were just a ride home, not dinner.
He strode to my side and slid his arm around my waist. I didn’t look back at Jasmine, but it wasn’t subtle as we walked away. He was claiming me the same way she’d tried to claim him. And I knew it was just for show, but it still made me feel good.
Just as being nestled at Kyle’s side made me feel good.
When we were halfway to the parking lot, he nudged me with his hip. “Sushi?”
I laughed at his tone of voice. “Not a fan?”
“Never had it. It’s not like we’re close to the coast.”
That was true, but there were some decent sushi places in Atlanta. I’d been there once or twice on special occasions. “Are there any sushi places in Haverford?”
“Not that I know of,” he said. I liked how he still had his arm around me even though we were well away from Jasmine. “So we’ll go to a place I know. There’s enough food for a meal—usually. If not, there’s always cereal. And sometimes, there are cute little taco muffins for movie nights.”
“Mini taco cups,” I corrected, my blood heating at the thought of other things that had happened at movie night.
“They were really good.”
“Thanks.” We’d reached his truck, and he led me over to the passenger side, opening the door for me. I held my breath, hoping he’d do something he’d only done a couple of times before—and then he did. He put his hands on my waist and lifted me up as if I were weightless.
I surveyed him from the new height. He was still taller than me, but our heads were closer to the same level. His sculpted torso brushed against my knees. What would it feel like to part them and let him step in between, so close to me? But that fantasy was expelled when he gently pushed my legs into the cab of the truck, facing me forward.
Then, something new. He pulled out the seatbelt, and instead of handing it to me like he had before, he reached across my hips and buckled it himself.
God, he was close. The warmth from his body filled mine with longing. And for the first time, I caught a hint of his shampoo. It smelled woodsy, and maybe a little like leather. I liked it.
He straightened up, a crooked smile on his face, probably because my eyes had glazed over with longing. He reached up, and fisted the column of my ponytail, tugging lightly. “I was always more of a fan of brunettes than redheads.”
I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face as we exited the parking lot and headed home. Who wanted to worry about her mother’s bad choices when she got to take a ride with a hot baseball player instead?
Definitely not me.
“Did Dr. Winters say when he’d return your paper?” I asked once we were on our way. I tried not to sound too eager, but I was curious how Kyle had done. We’d worked our butts off, and his final draft had been in fairly good shape.
“I think so, but I was distracted when he mentioned it. I had to change my bet at the last minute.”
What? “Your bet?”
“Yeah. My horse scratched, and I only had about sixty seconds to pick a new one. There wasn’t any time to look any of them up, so I chose the one with the coolest-sounding name.”
My jaw dropped. “You were betting on horse racing in the middle of class?”
He looked over as if I was the strange one. “I don’t control when the races start, Victoria.”
“Y-you…” I couldn’t even gather my thoughts. Forget betting on horses, he was betting on both my grade and his. My scholarship and his. “You really do that in class?”
He shot me an arrogant look, his lips clamped shut—but then I saw the corner of his mouth twitch.
“Kyle!” I couldn’t tell if I was more relieved or angry when he burst into laughter. I smacked his arm, not moving it a bit, but I did it again. “You jerk!”
He was still laughing. “I’m a jerk for not gambling in class?”
“You’re a jerk for making me believe it.”
His laughter finally dwindled, but he still had a self-satisfied smirk on his face. “No offense, but it was easy. You can be kind of naive and innocent sometimes.”
“Innocent?”
“You forgot naive.”
Though we were joking around, his assessment stung. “Would it be better to be calculating and pushy like that redhead?”
Kyle wasn’t smiling anymore. “No.”
“Is she your?—”
“No.” He glanced at me without turning his head, as if trying to ascertain my mood. “No one’s ever done that for me before.”
“Done what?”
“Pretended to be my girlfriend to get someone off my back.”
“Your back wasn’t the part of you she was pawing at.”
He laughed. “True. But thank you. It’s nice to be the one being rescued for a change.”
Maybe he was still teasing, but to my ears, he sounded sincere. “It was my turn. You rescued me, or rather my necklace, from my former roommate.”
“Ah, yes. Okay, then, we’ll call it even. Although to truly be even, you should’ve punched Jasmine in the face.”
I gave him the side eye. “Is that what you did to Todd? Is that all you did to Todd?” I’d been wondering but hadn’t been brave enough to ask.
He cocked an eyebrow. “Are you an undercover cop? Because you have to tell me if you are.”
“If I were, I’d point out that you’re going fifteen miles over the speed limit. Are you going to tell me or not?”
He shook his head. “You could be wearing a wire. How about this—I’ll tell you if you let me frisk you first.”
He was joking, but that didn’t stop heat from pooling in my core. “No thanks, I don’t want to know that badly.”
“Can I frisk you anyway?”
I couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up. Talking with him like this was fun. And arousing. And it was also kind of a challenge to keep up with his rapid-fire innuendo. But the one thing it wasn’t was scary. Because he’d made sure, back when he barely knew me, that I had an out if I wanted one.
I didn’t.
Things were quiet for a few minutes. As always, I admired the confident way he drove. Not that Jayden and Lucas didn’t, but with Kyle… well, he was an athlete. He was in complete control of his body. His every movement was efficient and skilled. And it was almost like his truck was an extension of him. He handled it as skillfully as he did a bat, ball, or glove.
“I enjoyed the game.” Immediately after I said it, I cringed. Could I have sounded any lamer? A person enjoyed a painting at the art gallery. What I’d said didn’t even come close to conveying how impressed I’d been. Then again, this was Kyle and gushing over him too much would just feed his already inflated ego. And possibly give him the wrong idea. Or, like the right-yet-still-not-wise idea.
“Me too.”
“Do you always do that? Steal bases and hit home runs and do flips and stuff?”
A smile played at his lips. “When I can. Being out on the field brings out the best in me. It’s always been my favorite part of school.”
That made sense, given how much trouble he had with papers and assignments. “Did you ever think of going pro?” I’d asked Jayden about that, but I wanted to hear Kyle’s response.
He shrugged. “I thought about it, but the thing is, I’m good—but I’m not that good.”
“Does that bother you?”
“No, not really. Baseball is fun. Hitting a home run is one of the best feelings in the world. But there are other things in life, too.”
“Did you—wait, are you okay with me asking you this stuff?”
“You can ask me anything.”
He said that last word in a suggestive way, but I could tell he really meant it. His confidence level was off the charts.
“Okay. Did you ever want to play for a bigger university? One that’s competitive in college sports or whatever?”
He tilted his head, one hand lazily turning the wheel. “I thought about it. I had a few offers. But I chose to play for Langley, and it wasn't until this year that I realized why.”
“Why?”
“Here, I’m a big fish in a small pond. At a bigger school, maybe one of the Big Ten, I’d be a small fish in a big pond. I prefer the former.”
Wow. That was surprisingly introspective of him. Maybe some people would have said he should go for the latter, but I admired him for doing what he wanted to do, and I told him so.
He nodded. “We only get one life to live—might as well live it the way we want to.” His fingers tapped on the steering wheel. “Was that the first game you’ve been to here?”
“Yes.”
“So you came to see me, then?”
Energy sizzled inside me as I braced myself, preparing to go head-to-head with him again. “Of course not. I came because I wanted to sit next to Jayden.”
He laughed. “Right. And that’s who the crowd was cheering for, too. Jay.”
“Exactly.” I bit my lip to keep from laughing.
“So what did you think of Jay’s performance yesterday?” Kyle leveled a knowing look at me.
“Honestly, it was pretty damn impressive.” I kept my eyes on the road, not braving looking at him. “Though I think maybe he was showing off a little.”
“Yeah, well, he’s like that sometimes.” Kyle chuckled, but then the truck slowed. “Hey, let’s head back to town, and I’ll take you to the batting cages. Have you ever been?”
“No, but?—”
“You’ll like it. I’ll show you how to hit. It’s a great stress reliever.”
He’d resumed his normal speed, but I was pretty sure he was on the lookout for a place to turn around.
“That sounds like fun, but I was hoping we could have a tutoring session tonight. We could go back to that coffee shop after dinner.”
His face fell. “I just finished a paper.”
“And another one’s already been assigned,” I said gently. “Plus, we need to start studying for the midterm exam. I’ve heard it’s a beast.”
Kyle was silent, his eyes forward, his thumb drumming on the edge of the wheel. “So baseball season is over. No more practices. No more games. Instead, I get to study more. Write more papers. And oh yeah, in my free time, haul crap out of the basement.”
“That’s part of getting a degree. Well, except for the basement thing.”
“It’s not one of the fun parts,” he grumbled, sounding like a sullen little boy.
“I agree, but it’s kind of the most important one. Do you know what you want to do after?—”
“No.”
“Well, you’re studying exercise science, right?”
“That’s just what athletes pick because they have to major in something.”
I tried to wrap my head around that—the idea that the degree wasn’t important, just the opportunity to play sports was. It was a foreign concept to me. And kind of depressing—especially since Kyle didn’t think he’d continue with baseball after college was over.
It was easy to dismiss him as just a jock—a really hot jock—but every day I was learning new things about him. Maybe even peeling back the layers a little. But there was one thing I still didn’t know much about. “Can I ask you something?”
He nodded. “I already said you can ask me anything.”
“I didn’t know how long that was in effect.”
“As long as you’d like.”
“So if I asked you to stop leaving wet towels on the bathroom floor, you’d do it?”
He smirked. “I said you can ask me anything, not that I’d do it. But maybe if you ask nicely…” His voice trailed off suggestively.
Normally, my body responded to that tone in his voice, but that wasn’t where my head was at right now. “Never mind.”
“Too scared?” he challenged.
“No.” At least I could say that honestly. “It’s nothing.”
“Victoria…” But that teasing voice wasn’t working on me at the moment.
“It’s a mood-killer, and I’m sorry I brought it up.”
“You haven’t brought it up yet,” he pointed out. “Look, we’ve still got twenty minutes left of the drive. I’m sure the mood can recover. So, out with it, Victoria.”
Biting my lower lip, I looked out the window. This was heading in a bad direction, and I wish I’d kept things light, but my emotions had been all over the place today, and I didn’t see any way out at this point. “What really happened with you and Lucas in high school?”
Kyle stilled, but his voice was neutral. “How much do you know?”
“Jayden told me the basics.”
He snorted. “Now there’s a reliable source.”
“What do you mean?”
“First off, he wasn’t a part of it. Secondly, he’s Lucas’s best friend.”
He had a good point. “I know it’s none of my business. But… you two are always so angry at each other. It’s upsetting. To me and to Jayden.”
“But is it really both of us who’re angry, Tori?” I was beginning to see a pattern of when he called me Tori, and when he used Victoria. Victoria was for when he was teasing and flirting. Tori was for when we were on more serious topics.
“All right. Lucas is the one that’s angry most of the time. But you egg him on.”
“True.” He shook his head slightly, lost in thought. “It’s kind of hard not to. He’s so self-righteous and full of himself all the time. My dad bought his act.”
“What do you mean?”
He released a long exhale. “Lucas was everything my father wanted in a son. My dad doesn’t give a shit about sports. He thinks they’re a waste of time. And then he met Cherry—Lucas’s mom—and he got a complete do-over. New wife. New son—the smart kind he always wanted. You should have seen him during Lucas’s valedictorian speech.”
Ouch.
“I’m sorry.” Sorry for him, sorry for the way his father had treated him, and very sorry for asking him about the past instead of letting it be. I patted his leg, and it was a testament to his mood that he didn’t comment on it. “I’m sorry that your dad doesn’t appreciate you for who you are. It’s ironic. Probably ninety percent of American fathers would be thrilled by having the sports star son. I’m sorry that yours isn’t.”
“Just my luck, I guess.” For the first time since I’d met him, he sounded bitter.
“So that’s why you and Lucas didn’t get along? Before… all that other stuff, I mean?”
His head tilted toward mine, but it felt like he wasn’t seeing me. His attention was locked in the past.
“We never liked each other when we met freshman year. It happens, right? There are some people you hit it off with, and other people you just don’t like for one reason or another. Imagine if you met someone you didn’t like and then boom, your parents married, and you had to live with them. It sucked.”
“I can’t even imagine.” I really wanted to take his hand in mine, to give him my support, but for once, he had both of his on the wheel. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, well, life does sometimes suck. Like when I have a paper due.” He threw me a quick glance at that, but there was no humor in his eyes. “And I think that wasn’t what you really wanted to ask me.”
“I don’t want to anymore.”
“Do it anyway,” he demanded. “Better to get it over with.”
Crap. Why hadn’t I just kept my mouth shut? We could've had a fun, flirty conversation the whole ride home. Or hell, we could be at the batting cages, doing whatever people did there. But here we were. “Did you… sleep with Lucas’s girlfriend?”
Kyle flinched, although he had to have been expecting that. The silence grew uncomfortable. “Do you think I did?”
“I don’t know,” I said softly.
“I guess you do, since you asked me.” His voice was tight.
“I asked because I don’t know, Kyle. As you pointed out, Jayden wasn’t there. And neither was I.” I hated the look on Kyle’s face right now—but I’d seen pain on Lucas’s face, too. “All I know is that Lucas gets so angry he can’t see straight. It’s the only time I’ve ever seen him let emotion overcome that logical brain of his. It’s like you’re the one thing he can’t be rational about.”
“They were in love,” Kyle said simply.
“Did… did you know that back then?”
“Yes.”
“And you still… with her…?”
His face tightened. “That’s how the story goes.”
“But is it the truth?”
“Everyone thinks it is.”
“But is?—”
“It doesn’t matter, Tori. It’s over. The damage is done.”
I’d never heard Kyle’s voice rise above a lazy drawl—until now. I’d never really heard him get emotional before. “I don’t think you could do that,” I said quietly.
He propped his elbow up on the ledge under the window, putting his hand over his eyes as if shielding them from the sun. “You don’t know me very well.”
Yet. That was the word I added in my head. I didn’t know him that well yet. But I wanted to. And then, maybe someday, I’d learn what the truth was. He was right, in some ways. It was over and done. Nothing was going to change the heartache Lucas went through. But on the other hand, it was important. Important to them, and important to me. Because I cared about both of them.
I turned to the window, blinking back the moisture that lined my lashes. “Can we talk about something else?” I asked quietly.
“Be my guest.”
But neither of us spoke for a while