Chapter Seven
Shaw
I got home before midnight, so thrown off by running into Gatlin, I didn’t know what to do with myself.
My drink went to waste, ice cubes melting and diluting the treat I’d counted on.
In no shape to scene with anyone else, I left.
Just when I’d begun to believe I could go on and live a contented life with my son and my family and friends.
Not everyone got mates… And bam. There he was, in my city, in a few sentences blowing up the peace I’d managed to find.
He shouldn’t have that power.
I parked and got out of the car, still shaken, still confused. My wolf’s renewed insistence that Gatlin was our mate didn’t help.
“You’re home awfully early,” Dad said when I came into the living room. “I thought you’d close down the joint.
“I couldn’t take advantage of you like that.
” Nor could I tell them I came home because I ran into Sebastian’s father.
They didn’t know all the details, of course, but they did know I’d gone through a pregnancy on my own without even telling them the alpha’s name.
I did want to find him myself, but the thought of my dads setting out to share their opinions on the situation gave me chills.
They loved and were protective of me and at least three times that for their grandson. “And I was ready to come home.”
“So you didn’t have a nice time?” Father looked so disappointed, I hurried to reply.
“No, I did, but I haven’t been out in such a long time, I guess I’m out of practice. Did Bastian wake up while I was gone?”
My not-so subtle attempt to change the subject had the desired result. “He was a perfect angel,” Dad said.
“Slept the whole time,” Father echoed. “You weren’t like that, was he, hon?”
And off they launched into their favorite story of how I tended to wake up and demand water at all hours of the night. If they’d been Bastian’s dads instead of mine, no doubt they would have been much more rested. But they were tired, too, and soon left to go home to their own beds.
I closed the door behind them and went into Sebastian’s room to check on him and kiss him good night again.
The hall light cast a soft glow over the toddler bed my boy had been so proud to pick out when we moved here.
A big-boy bed. Designing his room had helped him to feel at home after moving from the only place he’d ever known.
Sitting in the glider, a remnant of his nursery days when I’d sit and rock and nurse him, just the two of us alone in the night, I watched my son sleeping.
My dads were right about him being good at it.
He had slept through the night at only a few months old and still loved a good afternoon nap.
How many hours had I spent sitting beside his crib and now his little bed, just wishing time didn’t fly so fast. My baby was growing up.
Already, he spoke in full sentences and could climb all the playground equipment at the park.
His little cheeks were rosy in sleep, his hands fisted on either side of his head.
And then I saw it. “Bastian,” I whispered, “you look just like him.”
I might have known that if I’d seen him longer than I had the first time.
Between the dimly lit club and then the room, where the lights were out, I had more of a memory of how he scented—like a spice I couldn’t name but craved—and the sound of his voice than a distinct knowledge of how he’d looked.
And maybe that was because it was the one part of him I was able to tuck into the back of my mind.
My wolf was far more interested in scent than appearance.
Not that I’d forgotten how he looked, but I never noticed the resemblance.
Until tonight. This moment when his features were engraved in my mind.
And I sat in my home gazing down at the miniature version.
Holy hell. Once I’d given up on finding him to tell him I was pregnant, I’d assumed he didn’t want to be in my life except for one night.
He was the one who walked away, after all.
So, no guilt on my part for not sharing Sebastian with his alpha daddy.
But here he was. Maybe he didn’t want me, but did that make him an unfit father? How could he be when he hadn’t had the opportunity to know he even was one?
Unless he had other pups? What did I know about him?
Virtually nothing.
Standing, I went out into the hall and closed the door most of the way behind me.
I still had the baby monitor that would allow me to keep an eye from elsewhere in the house, of course, but I wanted privacy for a few moments to get my thoughts together.
He had the right to know… And my wolf was totally wound up.
I worried and fussed inside myself while I brushed my teeth and washed my face, changed into striped flannel pajama pants, and crawled into bed.
My phone sat in the charger on the nightstand where I’d left it on the way to the bathroom.
I had his number. He did not have mine. He had not pushed to get it, either, putting the control on whether we spoke again in my hands.
All I had to do, if I didn’t want to speak with him again, was nothing.
I had not joined the club yet, either. Although I wanted to.
But if I did, I’d be seeing him since he worked there. Did I want that as well?
Of course, I did. Whether that was intelligent or not might be another thing. The young omega who had spent the night with him had been replaced by a responsible father. But, whether he knew it or not, Gatlin was also a father.
Grabbing my phone, I sent a quick message before I could change my mind. Nice to see you again.
Then I plopped the device on the bed next to me.
I’d spent so much time watching my son sleep and recognizing how much he resembled his other father that even a club employee was probably home in bed.
He might not notice my message until tomorrow morning.
Great, and I could lie awake all night and worry about it.
A buzz-click made it evident there would be no waiting.
Nice to see you, too. Sleep well. I will leave your name at the front if you want to come to the club as my guest.