Beau
Two days with a baby, and I was already back out on ranch duties.
I mean, I was only going to be out on the ranch this morning.
We had scheduled Juniper’s first doctor’s appointment which would be a few hours from now.
Birdie had just one more day with us before she had to head back into work, so I knew she was happy to be soaking up the time with Juniper.
We spent the day yesterday lost in a sea of moving boxes and sweeping out dust from the room I basically used as a catch all for the better part of the last ten years.
Juniper now had an actual room of her own with furniture that needed to be assembled and walls that still needed to be painted, but it was her space; filled with her clothes, toys that we picked out just for her, and the best baby monitor money could buy.
It came with this fancy app, so I could click in on my phone and see what was going on if she was in her room while I was out on the ranch.
I’d set it up and left it in my bedroom, where her bassinet was sitting now, hoping that on a break I might catch a glimpse of my girls together.
I was fucking sweating up a storm, having just gotten my ass back to the main barn where our office was.
We had a couple of heifers who separated themselves from the herd, so after Kip and I reunited them, we joined Denver and Travis who were trying to clean out one of the main watering spots in the west pasture.
It was fucking brutal work under a clear sky, and hell, it wasn’t even summer yet.
I pulled my ranch shirt off over my head, using it to mop the sweat off my face and head before I put my hat back on.
Then out came my phone. A few clicks later, I could see Birdie and Juniper together in my room.
Birdie was sitting in one of the rocking chairs I originally had on the back porch.
She must have brought that in herself after I went out to work.
My head shook back and forth as I chuckled, turning up the volume. Birdie’s voice came through crystal clear.
“What do you think, berry girl? Are you ready for a nap? I was thinking about this little song I used to sing to my sister whenever she was missing our mom. Now, our mom wasn’t in heaven.
No. She was probably driving around Las Vegas with some guy named Stu, or Mark, or Jeffrey.
She wasn’t a good mom. But I tried to be for Lainey.
Sometimes, right before bed when I tucked her in, she would start to spiral about the day I’d leave her behind, too.
And I would tell her nothing, not even death, would keep me from watching over her.
That’s the same for you, Juniper. I know I’ll always be here for you, and I have a feeling your mom will, too.
Would you like to hear it? Oh, that was such a big yawn. Alright, gumdrop. Here it goes.”
I felt like I was watching a moment between them that wasn’t meant to be witnessed by anyone. Birdie had me choking on my emotions before the first note of her song even hit the air.
“My sweet baby, do not worry. For I’m not gone from here. I’ll be waiting at the springs until your time is near. You’ll step into the water and I will join you, too, and in the springs we’ll find the truth, that where life once ended, it begins again, anew.”
My throat ached at the raw emotion in her voice. I watched as she rocked Juniper back and forth, lovingly running her hand over the top of my daughter’s head. After a moment, when Juniper’s body relaxed in her arms, Birdie stood up and placed her into her bassinet.
I thought that was it, but as I got ready to put down my phone, I heard Birdie’s voice come through again, no louder than a whisper.
“I love you, Juniper. With my whole heart. It was instant, I hope you always know that. Just like with your daddy. He has my whole heart, sweet girl. I know you miss your mama. I know this has been so strange and probably scary, too. But you are doing such a good job. We’ll keep her memory alive for you, always.
You can always talk to me about her. Or your dad.
We’ll always tell you the truth. This family—your family—loves you so, so much.
And even though I might never be a Ford, I’ll always love and protect you like I am. ”
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Birdie’s words gutted me, in the most bittersweet way. I watched as the screen blurred, and I tried to blink the tears from my vision.
“Hey, sorry. I don’t mean to interrupt, but are you Beau Ford?” I wiped my eyes with my arm after slipping my phone back into my pocket and pulling my work gloves off my hands.
“Sorry,” I cleared my throat, “nothing like being a rancher with a hay allergy. But yeah, that’s me. What can I help you with?”
“My name’s Emmett Cassidy. Heard through the grapevine you might be looking for a ranch hand out here.”
“The grapevine?” I extended my hand to meet his. Clean shaven, dressed like he just came from church. Not the outward signs of a man used to the hard work done on a ranch, but he had a firm handshake.
The guy chuckled. “I live in Lark Lake. Don’t get out this way very much, but I was passing through town and stopped at Dolly’s.”
Ma was at the diner today and had clearly worked her magic with finding someone to come help out at the ranch. “Ah, so you met my mom.”
“I did.” He reached up and pulled his hat off his head, fiddling with the edges as he looked back at me. “I got lots of experience. Grew up on a ranch like this in Kansas, and traveled doing a couple rodeo circuits. Got a girl and a kid now I just want to be able to take care of.”
I nodded. “What’s your availability?”
“I could start today if you needed. Or I can come back tomorrow.”
Eager to work. I could use someone like that. “You looking to stay on the ranch? Or you wanting to drive out to Lark Lake every day?”
Emmett’s eyebrows pulled together in confusion.
“I only ask because we’ve got room in the bunkhouse.
As long as you clear the background check, you’re welcome to bunk here with the other ranch hands—Kip, Travis, and Denver.
They’re our full time guys, but sometimes Will and Archer stay out in the bunkhouse during the week if we need to start early or know we’re going to have a late night of work. ”
“Gotcha. A place in the bunkhouse during the week would be great. I’ll probably try to head home once or twice a week to see the missus, but cutting out an hour drive from here to there would be nice.”
“Alright. Well, if you can get my mama to offer you a place out here, I can’t go against that. I got some paperwork you’ll have to fill out. Why don’t you come with me to the office and we’ll get that taken care of, then I’ll show you the ranch. You can start tomorrow. Six a.m. sharp.”
He smiled, holding out his hand. “Sure thing. Thanks.”
“If you can win over my mama fast enough to have her offer you a place out here, I’m not going to step against her judgment.”
“Smart man.” Emmett laughed. “I’m the same way with my mama, and my girl.”
“The room on the right at the end of the hall is open. It’s not fancy, but it serves its purpose,” I said as I let Emmett into the bunkhouse. The guys were usually good about keeping things tidy, and they had left things in good condition this morning, too.
“This is great. I’m happy to pitch in however I can.”
“I’m sure the guys will appreciate that. We’ve got a cook that comes out during weekdays and leaves dinner in the fridge. Denver is the guy you’ll most likely find sliding whatever it is in the oven for everyone, but feel free to if you’re the first one in for the night.”
“That cook leave instructions? I’ve been known to fuck up toast.”
I laughed. “Yeah. He writes the directions right on the container.”
“We’ll be good then.”
I pointed to the closet. “There’s a washing machine and dryer, feel free to use it when you need it.”
“This is great. My girl’ll be happy I’m not bringing ranch clothes home for washing, especially with the baby.”
“Speaking of that, we’ll work out what two days you get off each week here in the next couple of days.
It rolls monthly, so it’s not always the longest tenured guy getting the weekends.
No one’s ever really bitched about it, and of course, if your family has something come up, we’ll make it work so you can be with them. ”
My phone rang, and Travis’s name flashed across the screen.
“What’s going on?” I asked as soon as the phone was against my ear.
“I’m out in the calving pasture. Looks like one mama had her baby last night.”
“Great, but why are you calling me? Is there a problem with the calf?”
“No. Got another one getting ready to have her calf…but something's not right. She’s struggling.”
“How bad?” I asked.
“I’ve been watching her for an hour, stepped in to see what I could do, but…We need to get her help, now. Everything I’m doing ain’t working. Gonna lose her and the baby if I don’t get a second set of hands out here to help. You’re the closest.”
“Give me ten minutes. I’ll be out there.”
“Get your ass out here in five.”
“Fuck.” I shoved the phone into my pocket and jogged to the door. “Sorry, man. We’ve got a mama in distress trying to deliver her calf. Think you can walk back to the barn?”
Emmett jogged up to me. “I’ll do one better—I can come out and try to help. I’ve been around the block a time or two with a stubborn delivery.”
I didn’t have time to waste.
“Good. Let’s go.”
We were out of the bunkhouse and out to the truck in what felt like two seconds.
“So, you have a kid?” I asked, pulling off the main road to head out to the pasture where Travis had called from.
“Yep. She’s just a little thing, just like her mama. A handful of weeks old now, and we’re in the trenches. Who knew such a small kid could cause so much disruption to life?” Emmett smiled. “How ‘bout you? Got a missus or any kids?”
“Yeah, I’ve got a daughter, too. She’s four months old.”
“Tell me it gets easier.” He laughed. “I need to know there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.”
Fuck. I wouldn’t know. The few days Juniper had been with us hadn’t been all too bad.
Sure, she woke up at night, but it was nothing to give her a cuddle and a bottle to get her back to sleep.
I actually really liked it. “Couldn’t tell ya really if it gets easier or not.
I only just found out about her. Last week, actually. ”
“No way. That had to be a fucking surprise of a lifetime. What happened? Her mom just showed up and plop her into your arms?”
Nothing about sharing this story with a stranger felt right. “Something like that.”
I slammed the truck to a stop, grateful for the timing of it all. Jumping out, Emmett moved the gate while I grabbed the calving chains and jack from the back of the truck.
We ran over to Travis, who was elbow deep inside the cow.
“What the fuck is the problem?” I barked.
“Calf’s got its face and one leg in position, but I’m having a hell of a time repositioning it for that second leg.”
“I can—”
“Let me.” Emmett nodded as he interrupted me, rolling up the sleeves on his button down shirt. “I’ve helped in a presentation just like this before. It’s tricky, but I think I can do it.”
Travis pointed to the equipment he’d brought out with him on the ground. “Have at it.”
“Jesus, I’m glad you were here to catch this.” I patted Travis’s shoulder. “Fucking makes me sick when this happens in the middle of the night and we lose ‘em.”
“Calf was alive when I checked a minute ago, but it’s been like this for a while, boss. We still might lose ‘em.”
“Emmett?” I asked, watching as he stood by the cow, gloves covering his hands and arms.
“I’ve got to wait for this contraction to pass.”
I turned to Travis. “Have the calving chains ready. I want to help mama out as much as possible, and get this calf out as quickly as we can.”
He nodded, jogging over a few steps to where I dropped the chains.
“Okay.” Emmett turned his head towards me, his eyes closed as he tried to palpate the calf’s position. “He’s right. Retained limb. I’ve got to maneuver the calf back and see…if I can…oh, he’s a right rotten little thing. Let’s…go! I got it! Get me the chains.”
“You got both limbs and the head?” Travis confirmed.
“Yeah, I remember the rule of three. Let’s get this calf born, what do you say?”
“Sounds good to me.”
I watched Travis and Emmett work together to get the chains wrapped around the calf’s legs, which were now dangling out of our laboring mama.
“Grab the calving jack,” Emmett ground out as he began pulling the calving chains with the cow’s contraction. Little by little, more of the calf was born.
“Go back and forth…I’ve got a feeling this calf is a big one. It’ll angle the chest better for delivery,” Travis instructed as he handed over the jacks.
I watched, arms folded as the two men—one who wasn’t even technically my ranch hand yet—worked as a team to free the calf from its mom.
It took another contraction before the calf was fully born. Mama cow moved in quickly after that, not liking the time it took Emmett to get the chains off her baby. She spent time licking the little one clean before nudging it—encouraging it—to stand.
Relief swelled through my entire body as the calf perked up with the attention. Is this what Birdie felt like each time she watched new life come into the world? It was probably just a fraction of that, if I was being honest with myself.
My mind wandered to Juniper and her birth. That pit of anger and sadness burned in my stomach at the thought. I’d missed that with her, and it was something I’d never get back.
“Hey, I appreciate the help.” Travis extended his hand out to Emmett, both guys now out of their protective gloves, the birthing gear tossed once again to the ground.
“No problem, man. I’m Emmett, by the way.”
“Travis,” he introduced before turning to me. “You’re hiring this guy, right?”
“Yup.” I nodded, crossing my arms and pushing down all the emotions I had let bubble to the surface. “That is, if he still wants the job after that chaos.”
Emmett laughed. “It was a great introduction to your ranch. I’ll be back tomorrow.”