Epilogue
KIERAN
Candles flickered and sent shadows dancing onto the walls of the house Jordy and I had only just closed on two days prior.
Sidestepping one of the many stacks of boxes still laying around, I shoved the lighter in a drawer and closed it.
One less item out making a mess. It didn’t bother me much, but I knew the chaos was already starting to drive him a little insane.
When I glanced at the time on my phone, I determined he would be pulling up from picking up our takeout any minute now, though the pop-up thunderstorm had delayed him a little bit. It’d been clear when he’d left, but the weather could be so erratic at the end of summer.
As if to support my thought, a bolt of lightning flashed nearby, drowning out my romantic candlelight for a brief moment. I used to wake up in a cold sweat after dreaming about storms like this one, but I hadn’t had a nightmare in years.
I’d pretended to need to finish up some inventory stuff for work, so he’d go and pick up the food himself, leaving me a chance to set up for my plan.
Nothing extravagant or over the top, just low key and sweet, which is what he liked.
He’d always take a night at home cuddled up on the couch with me over a fancy restaurant or extravagant show date.
Watching from the big bay window we hadn’t gotten around to putting up curtains in front of yet, an interesting mix of nerves and relief bloomed up in my stomach as his car pulled into our neat little driveway.
Nerves because of what I was about to do, and the automatic sense of comfort that came from having him close to me.
His four years of university had turned into six when he’d decided to pursue his master’s in social work. We’d spent as much time together as we could during the school year, and then stayed attached at the hip every summer. Now that he’d finished up and gotten his degree, he’d moved back home.
It had only taken a couple of months for us to find a place we both liked, and near enough to our parents that they wouldn’t collapse under the weight of empty nest depression.
We’d coped with the constant on-and-off periods of separation as gracefully as possible, but now all that was over and we finally had our own private little sanctuary together.
I hadn’t realized just how much I’d craved this, and how it felt like we were finally starting our lives together.
I pushed open our front door and stepped aside so he could rush in with the food, though the heavy sheets of rain had already started soaking through his clothes by the time he made it in.
“Jesus!” He complained, panting a little as he made his way in and set the dripping bag down on our kitchen counter. “Did the power go out?” He wondered, glancing around.
“Ah, no,” I answered quickly, coming up behind him with the towel I’d already had ready and ruffling it over his crown of blond hair. “I just… Thought it would be nice. That’s all.”
“Oh, okay,” he acknowledged. When he pulled the towel down to reveal his face, he was smiling this sweetly radiant smile that made my heart do a quick tumble in my chest. Even if I’d seen that expression on his face a million times now, it was too beautiful to get used to.
“Here,” I said, grabbing the hoodie I’d specifically set on a stack of boxes next to the door so I could put it on him when he walked in. I stretched it out to let him back into it and push his arms through the sleeves, hoping he wouldn’t dig around in the front pocket until I was ready for him to.
“Mm, thanks,” he said, with a little shiver. “That rain was cold.” Of course he hadn’t thought to bring an umbrella when there’d barely been a cloud in the sky when he’d left the house.
Once he was snugly wrapped up in it, he turned, raising up on his toes and tilting his face up for a kiss.
Cupping the back of his neck, I slanted my mouth over his.
When he tried to pull away after a moment, I held him in place with my hand there, drawing him back up for a deeper, longer kiss.
He purred, gliding his hands up my chest and anchoring himself there until we broke apart.
His candy scent permeated my senses like always, and I welcomed the serene feeling I got from breathing it in.
“Was I gone longer than I thought?” He wondered teasingly, and I shook my head, dragging my fingers along his jawline and brushing them over his pretty, full lips.
Sometimes the urge to touch him was so strong I couldn’t ignore it, and I didn’t need to try, anyway.
He was mine to touch whenever I wanted, wherever I wanted.
And now I didn’t have to wait for weekends and holidays.
“I just missed you, Angel,” I said honestly. He let out a delighted little noise and nuzzled into my chest as he hugged me tightly. I could tell by the completely calm energy flowing between us through our mate bond that he was totally content.
“After we eat, I swear I’m going to get back to work unpacking,” he informed me, with a light sigh.
He wasn’t really saying it for my benefit, since I’d been telling him how impressed I was with what he’d already gotten done in the short time we’d been moved in.
It was more that after six years of near-constant heavy course loads, he was already going stir crazy sitting at home with not much to do while I was at work, since he hadn’t gotten hired on anywhere yet.
To my intense pride, I’d spent the time he’d been at school busting my ass building up clients and also learning about the business side of running the shop from Barbie.
Now I had a lot more responsibilities, like ordering inventory and managing schedules, while she focused a lot of her time on the other shop she’d opened across town.
And all that had come with a fat pay raise, which I’d used to fund the down payment on this place.
I’d done it all on my own, after agonizing for so long that I’d never be able to really contribute to our lives together.
“Don’t worry about that,” I said. “You’ve done enough for today.”
Looking around at all of the boxes, he let out a little groan, like he didn’t agree with my assessment.
“As long as we have a bed, then I’m good,” I added. He snorted, giving me a sly grin.
“Of course you would say that,” he remarked. But as usual, a reminder of the insatiable way I couldn’t keep my hands off him gave him a cocky little thrill.
“Just relax for now and let me take care of you,” I suggested, bringing my hand up to stroke over his still-damp hair, the strands like silk between my fingers.
“Are you trying to butter me up for something?” He asked, in a mocking suspicious tone, peering up at me. More lightning flashed through, briefly highlighting his face before plunging us back in the shadows.
I cleared my throat. Could he tell I was anticipating something?
He’d always been good at analyzing me, but the longer we were mated, the better he got at it.
It was basically impossible for me to hide anything or surprise him now, which was why I’d had to throw something together casually and at the last minute.
“Not exactly,” I said, and he raised an eyebrow like he didn’t exactly believe me.
As I’d suspected, I wouldn’t be able to hold out on him for very long, which was fine with me.
If I waited much longer, the butterflies in my stomach would start flying out of my mouth.
“Well, uh, there is something, actually.”
“I knew it,” he said, sort of triumphantly. Shaking my head and giving him a wry look, I nudged him back until he was seated in a dining room chair. I knelt down so we were more at eye level with each other, settling between his thighs.
“Okay, I definitely like where this is going,” he commented, smirking as his dark lashes fluttered at me. “Not sure why you’d feel like you need to butter me up for this, though. Pretty sure I’ve never turned down a blowjob.”
Shaking my head, I glanced up at the ceiling. He still loved getting on my nerves. “I’m not trying to give you a blowjob, Jordy.”
“Okay, sorry,” he relented with a melodramatic sigh. “What do you want to talk about?”
“I’ve been thinking a lot. About us, and how we’re finally able to start our lives together,” I started, and I watched his features soften a bit as he realized it was going to be one of those talks.
“I think about the person I was when we got together, and… Everything has changed so much, and I’ve grown so much.
I feel like I don’t even know that guy anymore. ”
“Hey,” Jordy chided me gently. “Be nice. I loved that guy. Very, very deeply.”
Smiling, I leaned down a bit to rest my cheek on his thigh for a second. Notes of bubblegum and lollipops floated in the air all around me, and my heart felt so full I thought I could burst.
“I hope you love the guy I am now as much as you loved him,” I said, and he reached out to cup either side of my jaw, holding me in place while he stared into my eyes.
“Kieran, I love you with all my heart, every version of yourself you’ve ever been or will be. And anyway, we’re still the same people. We’re just… Older. We’re better,” he tacked on.
“You’re completely perfect,” I contradicted his statement.
“You always have been, and you always will be.” It was the kind of thing I would have only voiced in my head back when we’d first become mates.
But now I knew I could be completely open with him with even my most embarrassing thoughts.
Even if he would inevitably tease me about some of them.
“We’re perfect together,” he replied, an immaculate segue to my next thought.
“Yeah. We’re perfect together. Why is why I… I thought maybe it’s time for us to… You know, do the next thing.”
So I still wasn’t the most articulate or smooth when it came to certain topics. I was starting to think that part of my brain was pretty much done developing and this was as good as it was going to get.
At his questioning expression, I went on.