Chapter 28 #2
I turn toward the toilet and throw up for the third time today. What the hell is even left in my stomach at this point? Considering I vomited first thing this morning before I ate breakfast just proves it doesn’t matter if there’s food in there or not. Soon I’ll be throwing up my organs.
Once the sickness settles and I brush my teeth again, I grab the other two boxes of tests and dip them in the cup of pee just to double-check.
Even though the digital test is supposed to be ninety-nine percent accurate, so should’ve been my birth control and condom combo. I’m not trusting just one test.
Ten minutes later, I have two more positive tests staring at me.
I’m not really sure how to feel, but at least I know for certain.
And now, I need to decide how I’m going to tell my boyfriend and crush his heart.
As it gets colder out, I stay bundled up as I work. A hat, two layers on top, and insulated boots. Even though the trailer blocks out most of the cold, it’s the wind that sends a chill to my bones.
Tripp already stopped by early this morning with Landen, and I hate that I had to act like nothing was different. It feels like lying, but I’m not going to tell him through text or while we’re both preoccupied with our jobs.
Landen seemed better than he was last week and even teased me for looking like a hibernating bear while he was just in a long-sleeved shirt. But I teased him back that he works up a sweat and I stay in one spot for hours.
Noah
I’m coming over now!
As soon as I read her text, I start making her coffee. She’s a basic bitch like me and it’s how I came up with the Basic Witch Spice latte name, which is just pumpkin syrup with extra whip and nutmeg on top.
When I see her walking up, I rush out of the trailer, and she sprints toward me. I burst out laughing when she crashes into me and we wrap our arms around each other.
“I’m so happy you’re back!” I squeal into her hair.
“Me too.”
“I have a lot to tell you,” I say, going back behind my counter to finish her drink.
“Oh God, that sounds serious.” Noah stands close, waiting for me to elaborate, but the pounding in my chest is making me feel like I’m going to pass out.
“I fucked up,” I begin.
She arches a brow. “With what?”
I blow out a breath, trying to calm my racing heart. She’s going to be so pissed with me.
“I might’ve hooked up with Travis a month ago...”
Four weeks and three days, to be exact.
Her jaw drops as she gasps. “Magnolia Sutherland! You did not! And why am I just now hearin’ about it?”
“Because I knew that’d be your reaction,” I tell her honestly. And it’s embarrassing as hell.
“Well...” She shrugs unapologetically.
“I was drunk and horny. And very, very, very stupid,” I try to explain, but honestly it was more than that. Stupid Lydia and her annoying ass being all over Tripp is also to blame. Might as well blame Landen too for making Tripp hang out with her in the first place.
“The start to every country song.” She snorts as if she’s trying to hold back laughter. “Okay, so are y’all back together now or what?”
I shudder and nearly gag at the thought of his hands on me.
“God, no. I told him to lose my number and blocked him. Drunk Magnolia ain’t makin’ that decision again.”
“Good. You deserve better.” It’s comforting hearing that because Travis tried so hard to tear me down and make me believe I wasn’t worthy to be loved or respected. Not to mention, took advantage of me when I was drunk and drugged me.
I finish her drink with a healthy dose of whipped cream, then hand her the cup.
“I took a pregnancy test, Noah.” Well, technically three.
When I see her expression, reminding me just how much I’ve truly fucked up, tears fall down my cheeks.
“It was positive,” I confirm.
“Aw, sweetie.” She walks around to the side, opens the door, and engulfs me in a hug. “I’m not sure if I should say congratulations or not but—”
“I dunno either,” I admit as I continue to cry with her arms wrapped around me.
Pulling back, I wipe my face and fidget before I tell her the rest. “That’s not the worst of it.”
Her brows lift. “What’s worse than being knocked up by your ex?”
I swallow hard and try not to word-vomit the hardest part about all of this.
“I slept with someone I really like after him, and now I’ve ruined any chance at a relationship.” Well, a long-lasting one. “He’ll never want me once he finds out I’m havin’ another man’s baby.”
Her eyes widen and her jaw drops.
Yep, just how I thought she’d react.
“Magnolia! I leave you for a couple of weeks...” She laughs but in a sincere way. “You’re sure he ain’t the father? What happened to those Magnum XL condoms I gave you last year? Surely you didn’t go through an entire pack already.”
“Trust me, Travis doesn’t need XL, but we did use one. It was either expired or it broke,” I explain with a scowl. “And yes, I’m sure. I track my period and ovulation cycles on an app. By the time I slept with the other guy, I woulda already been pregnant. I just obviously didn’t know.”
“Alright, so who is it?”
Nervously, I lower my gaze to the floor. “It was Tripp.”
“Wait...” She scratches her head as if she needs a moment to compute the words I just said. “My brother, Tripp?”
I wince at her raised voice.
She clears her throat as if she hadn’t meant to sound so harsh. “Tripp, as in the guy you’ve crushed on for nearly a decade and has never shown interest in you, Tripp?”
Sucking in my lips, I nod. “Yep. Turns out he does kinda like me.” A lot if his words and actions are any indication.
She takes a moment to process and then says, “If he truly does, he’ll accept you and the baby. But he might not be ready for that, so you’ll need to prepare yourself for that possibility.”
“Oh, I am. I’m expectin’ him to push me away and never speak to me again.”
That’s what I’d do if I were him.
She pulls me in for another hug. “Well, I’ll be here for you no matter what. My little niece or nephew will be spoiled as hell.”
I tighten my grip around her. “Thank you.” And then, to lighten the mood, I bring up something we’ve joked about since we were in high school.
“I can’t believe you get to sit behind me and chant push, push, push durin’ my labor before I get to do it for you.
My hot girl summer just turned into fat girl winter. ”
“Oh my God.” She bursts out laughing as we pull apart. “First, that was never gonna happen. Second, summer was over before your little one-night stand mishap, but if it makes you feel any better, we’ll at least be fat together.”
It takes me a second to understand what she’s saying, and then I lower my gaze to her stomach. “What?”
No freaking way.
She nods with a contagious smile. “Yeah. Just found out this mornin’.”
My jaw drops, and I smash her into another hug. “Holy shit! I never thought we’d be pregnant together!”
“Me neither. We weren’t even tryin’!”
“Damn.” I step back with a smirk. “Daddy Fisher sperm workin’ double time.” I waggle my brows at the nickname I gave him last year, and she smacks my arm.
“I swear it was the water at that place. Either that or honeymoon sex works faster.”
I lean against the counter and grin. Her being pregnant with me makes this so much better. “What if our kids grow up and marry each other? We’d be in-laws!”
She giggles. “You’re nuts, you know that?”
“I do. These hormones are about to make it worse, too.”
“Now we can annoy Fisher and my brothers together.”
She grabs her cup of coffee and takes a sip. Considering we’re going to have to limit our caffeine intake now, I don’t blame her for taking advantage one last time.
“About that. I need you to keep this a secret, at least until I can tell Tripp myself.”
“Yeah, of course. Are you gonna tell Travis?”
My top lip curls as I groan. “Eventually. I wish I didn’t have to, but if he finds out before I tell him, he’ll be even more immature about it. If it were up to me, he wouldn’t exist at all.”
“You know that ain’t fair, though. He deserves a chance to be a father; if he chooses not to be, you can cut him out completely. Just don’t let him back into your life, if you know what I mean.”
It’ll be an icy cold day in hell before that happens. I cross my arms and sigh. “Yes, Mother. I don’t wanna anyway.”
“Good. Then all you need to focus on right now is eatin’ healthy, stayin’ stress-free, and gettin’ enough sleep.”
“What ’bout you? Are you still gonna ride?” I ask.
“Yes, but I won’t do tricks or stunts. I’m sure Fisher will try to ban me from all trainin’, but it’s literally my job, so he’ll just have to deal with it. But otherwise, I’m gonna make sure I don’t overdo it, either. We can be accountability partners.”
My whole body warms at that idea. I won’t have to go through this new scary journey alone.
“I love that idea. This is much more excitin’ now that you’re knocked up, too.” I giggle and take out my phone.
“Happy to have forgotten my birth control for you,” she deadpans.
“I downloaded this pregnancy app. You should get it, and then we can track our progress and milestones. It says my baby is the size of a lentil.” I hold up my hand and make a tiny circle.
Once she’s downloaded it, she inputs the date of her last menstrual cycle, and it reveals she’s four weeks along.
“Mine is the size of a poppy seed.” She shows me the photo. “Hm, Poppy. That’s a cute name.”
I shoot her a look of concern. “Sorry, but I’m not namin’ mine Lentil.” If that’s where she’s going with it, I’d choose Chatty or Willow first.
At the thought of Tripp’s baby name idea, tears threaten to fall again.
Noah bursts out laughing. “Fair enough.”
Per the app, I’m six weeks along, which means we’re only two weeks apart and we’ll go through a lot of our milestones together.
“I’m excited to go through my first pregnancy with you. Even if the circumstances aren’t what you’d hoped for, you’re gonna be a mom, and that’s somethin’ to celebrate,” she says as I stare at the screen.
I nod. “You’re right.”
At the end of the day, regardless of the shitty situation I got myself in, a new life will be born in nine months and I’ll be responsible for them. A baby that’ll change my life forever.
“We’ll plan a dinner and sleepover at my house this weekend. Whaddya say? I’m sure Mallory and Serena would love to come to a dance party.
I actually love that idea. We’ve been doing them for years, and when the girls came into our lives, we recruited them to join us. Even in our twenties, we act like we’re back in high school again and have the time of our lives.
“Can you still have slumber parties when you’re married?” I tease, and when the tears I try holding back fall, I quickly wipe them.
“Um, duh. Fisher knows who he married. If he wasn’t prepared for Taylor Swift sing-alongs and pajama nights, he shouldn’t have proposed.”
I’m so envious of their relationship but am so happy she has him. She deserves a great guy like him. That’s the future I envisioned with Tripp, but now, that might be gone.
“You’re so lucky to have each other. You won the husband lottery,” I say.
“And you will find someone equally lucky to have you. I promise.”
I already have...but he might not want me after he finds out the truth.
We chat for a few more minutes as she drinks her coffee. When a customer approaches, we hug goodbye and make plans to see each other on Thanksgiving in a couple of days.
For the next two hours, I have a steady line of people, so I don’t have time to overthink, but as soon as three hits and I close up for the day, my brain spirals out of control again.
Maybe I should only focus on my business and pregnancy.
Maybe being in a relationship right now isn’t the best idea.
Maybe I should let him go so he can be happy with someone else.
Tripp doesn’t deserve the shitstorm I’m about to lay on him. Especially once Travis knows, he’s going to be insufferable about us getting back together.
No matter what he says, promises, or does—that’ll never happen.
I’m stronger and have more self-respect for myself than when I was in high school.
Plus, it’s not only me I have to think about now.
Another human is going to depend on me for everything and that alone is scary.
How am I supposed to juggle dating into the mix?
I can’t even fathom being with someone who’s having a kid with someone else, so I can’t expect that kind of understanding from Tripp. As much as I’ve wanted him for years and have been insanely happy these past few weeks, my life’s about to flip upside down.
And that’s not fair to him.
By the time I get home, I’ve made my decision.
Our now perfect little bubble is about to burst because I’m about to destroy everything we made.