Chapter 15 Sully #2
I hung my head as a buzz sounded, indicating my car was here to take me to the airport. I met her gaze, my own eyes wet with emotion. I forced out the words. “Then I will keep my promise and let you go. You have nothing to fear from me, Autumn. Or my family or anything else.”
I rose to my feet. “I have to go. The car is waiting.”
She stood, and I engulfed her in my arms, drawing her close and holding her tight, praying this wouldn’t be the last time.
“I love you, mo fhiadh beag. That hasn’t changed for me, nor will it, even if you walk away. I will be here, waiting for you. And if you needed me, I would come.” I held her tighter. “I don’t want to leave you like this.”
“I need time to think,” she whispered.
“Will you be here when I return?”
“Yes.”
Relief flooded me, but I knew we had a lot to work through. I could only hope we were able to do so.
She lifted her head, tears rolling down her face. I cupped her cheeks and bent low, kissing her, memorizing the feel of her mouth against mine. Her taste. How she felt molded to me.
Then I walked away from her, knowing I was leaving my heart behind.
Knowing I would never again need it if I didn’t have her.
AUTUMN
The flat felt strange after Sully left. As if the discovery that the man I had fallen in love with had a darker side made the place colder somehow.
Or maybe it was knowing he was gone that made me feel even sadder.
I had no idea what to do with the information he provided me. How to accept a part of him I didn’t know existed. It's not as if we disagreed on our favorite candy.
He condoned murder when it was “required.” He was actively searching for someone to have them killed on my behalf.
Did that make me an accomplice?
I paced around, tense and upset. I stared out the window, losing track of time as my mind tried to absorb everything I had learned. A short while later, a soft knock on the door startled me, and when I peeked out, I was surprised to see Bonnie standing there.
And yet, I wasn’t.
I opened the door, and she looked at me, a sympathetic expression on her face. “Sully sent me. He said you needed a friend.”
I opened the door wider to let her in.
She was right.
Bonnie made tea, obviously at home here.
I sat on the sofa, my mind racing. She handed me a mug.
“Talk to me, my friend. You look as if you’ve seen a ghost.” She clicked her tongue.
“Sully is all over himself, upset and thinking of refusing to go to Dublin and chuck his career down the drain just to come back and comfort you.” She met my eyes.
“He’s terrified he’s lost you. I’ve never heard him so distraught. ”
I shut my eyes. “How much do you know about him and, ah, what Niall and Finn, um, are?”
“They are great men. All of them. The choices they have made are theirs. They have been good to me and my family. To Roisin and her friends.”
“But they—”
She cut me off. “I was stuck once. Terrified out of my mind in Paris. I went on a solo vacation even though I was told repeatedly not to go alone—that it could be dangerous. Turned out those who advised me were right. I was being followed. I kept seeing the same man for two days everywhere I went. The way he watched me terrified me. And I knew I was being targeted. I called Sully, and he told me to stay where I was in a little café. Half an hour later, a couple walked in and came to my table. They knew my name and told me to call Sully. I did, and he confirmed Finn had sent them. That I was safe. They escorted me back to the hotel, checked me out, and took me to a much nicer place. Showed me a picture of the man following me to confirm it was him. It turned out he and some others were known for grabbing women tourists off the street. They assured me it was over and I was safe—that I had an escort the next few days anywhere I wanted to go. In the end, I cut my trip short, I was so rattled.”
“What happened to him?”
“I have no idea. He chose his life and the consequences that came with it. Whatever happened, I am sure, saved several other women’s lives.
I went home and saw Sully. He didn’t berate me or say I told you so.
He just made sure I was safe and okay.” She took a sip of tea.
“I read in the papers about a kidnapping ring in Paris that was discovered and arrested, but all of them died in an accident. I assumed the man was one of them.”
“And that didn’t bother you? Sully condones murder, so you do too?”
She set down her tea and met my gaze. “Neither of us condones the murder of innocent people. But let me ask you a question, Autumn. If Sully’s life were in danger and you could eliminate the threat or walk away with your high moral code intact, which would you choose?”
I didn’t hesitate. “Sully.”
“And he is choosing you. He chose me when I was threatened. He knew those men who were following me would never be convicted or stopped. He enlisted help to save me and other innocent women. They chose to end it.”
“Isn’t that playing God?”
She shrugged. “Some would say so. Others are grateful for the intervention they can provide.”
I was torn.
“Sully said he killed someone once.”
“Did he tell you about it?”
“No. We didn’t have much time to talk.”
“He was younger and in a gang. There was a standoff, and innocent people were going to get killed. When the leader of the other gang decided it would be fun to kill a family and make an example of them, Sully killed him. He was hurt badly but recovered. That was when he decided to change his life. He left Dublin and came here. Went to uni, worked, put himself through law school. Left the gang life behind him, much like Niall.”
“But he still…” I trailed off.
“He does what he does to keep the people he loves safe,” she stated firmly.
Then she softened her voice and leaned over, clasping my hand.
“He loves you, Autumn. For the first time ever, I see him opening up. He’s head over heels.
And I know you love him. I’ve seen you together.
The connection is incredible. Don’t throw that away because he’s not black-and-white. ”
“I have to think.”
She nodded, looking unhappy. “I know it’s a shock. But he’s still Sully. He would do anything to protect you.” She hesitated. “Probably cut all ties to all of it, including Finn and Niall, if you asked him.”
“I wouldn’t ask him to cut off his family.”
“But he would, I think. Surely that must show you his devotion. His true self.”
Somehow, her words left me even more confused.