35. Chapter Thirty-Five
Chapter Thirty-Five
Laredo
I can’t believe what I’ve just seen. What I’ve just heard.
I’m standing outside the music studio, having raced down the steps in search of a very pissed-off Adam. It’s a side of him he rarely shows. But that isn’t what I can’t believe I’m witnessing—it’s who it’s directed at. Not me but Ariel.
The rock goddess whom he’s fallen fast and hard for.
Five minutes ago, Ariel and I were rocking together in the studio. Emily, Ariel’s good friend, and Adam were chatting in the soundproof control room. Ariel tapped on the booth glass, had them switch on the mic, and told Adam to swap places with me in the studio, and he lost every ounce of whatever little cool he once possessed.
He caught an attitude and raced out of the studio. Ariel chased after him. Ariel’s temper is legendary, and after a few minutes, I became concerned for Adam. That’s when I came across them arguing in front of the studio, and I heard what I can’t unhear.
“This whole week was nothing but a competition. Me competing against my brother. My goddamn brother Ariel. You know the issues we’ve had. What would make you think any of that was a good idea?”
I’ve never seen Adam so mad in my entire life. She tried to explain, and the pieces came together. The lead guitarist for Ariel’s band, Devil May Care, is leaving the group. He wants to spend time with his family and stop touring. Ariel needed a replacement, and rather than ask either of us, she decided to invite us here to decide which might be a better fit for her band.
She was never interested in finding a new sound. Apparently, that was a happy accident, as she underestimated Adam’s skill.
I watch as the realization hits her of her misstep. We’re not just brothers but twins. We’ve been compared to one another our entire life. It’s left deep scars in each of us.
I raced down the steps to protect Adam from Ariel’s temper, but she is the one left befuddled, bewildered, and confused.
Adam stalks away in disgust. I know him well. He’s going to go do something physical to burn off his anger. Something constructive and positive like building a house for habit for humanity. I’ll catch up with him later.
For now, I need to understand why Ariel did what she did. I’m standing by the studio entrance six feet behind her. She has no idea I’m here. I take a step forward and make my presence known. “Were you ever going to even choose him?”
She spins, and I expect to see fire in her eyes. Instead, all I find are watery eyes filled with regret. “He was the only one in the running for my heart.”
Not the response I expected. “You really like him? This week…”
“Was real.” She doesn’t hesitate, and I lower the protective defenses I carry for my brother. Adam has a tender heart, and if she had toyed with it, he’d be devastated. “I messed it up. I know that. He’s a good man. He deserves better.”
I think about my brother. What he deserves. Since the band dissolved, he’s been drifting just like me. Anchorless, he pitched in wherever he felt there was a need. Babysitting me at my failed bar gigs. Doing admin tasks for Hailey. He hadn’t found his purpose until he wrote that song for Ariel. She had been the spark he was missing. “He deserves you.” I won’t let my brother make the mistake I’ve repeated, walk away from something great right in front of him. “Someone to push him. To make him see himself in the light he deserves.”
I explain to her all the reasons why Adam and she are good for one another. Ariel doesn’t believe in apologies or second chances, but I force her to consider doing both for Adam. “Can you make sure he stays in town through Sunday?”
Her question is loaded. Sunday is the last day of the music festival. The biggest show of the week. She spilled another secret, trying to justify her actions to Adam. Her band is coming to town to perform on Sunday. It was going to the coming-out party for her new lead guitarist.” “I have no idea what comes next, but I know I need him here. It’s going to be an important day for all of us. Especially for you.”
I laugh at her assumption. “So, are you asking me to play with you guys on Sunday?” A week ago, I wouldn’t have asked. Performing on the big stage with all the headliners and every eye in the industry locked on me is a bucket list achievement. But a lot has changed in a week. “What about Adam? Would you still be asking if you two didn’t have that blow-up? You know… the two of you are kind of a couple. I’d think you’d want to tour with your boyfriend.” The question comes across as if I’m asking about me, but my intent is to fully understand Ariel’s intent with my brother.
“It was going to be you, Laredo. Your musical talents fit our band better.” The corners of her eyes squeeze in concentration. I can only imagine what is swirling through her head. She truly is an impressive woman. Her band is her family, and she’ll choose what is right for them over everything, including her own self-interest.
I watch and take notes. Sacrifice for the greater good. I bow and give her a goofy grin, impressed. “You really are the baddest person in the rock world.” It is the greatest compliment I can give anyone.
“Welcome to the band.”
She offers everything I thought I wanted: fame, money, traveling the world, sold-out arenas, a record deal.
Everything I wanted—a week ago.
I stuff my hands into my back pocket, an image of holding Betty in my arms bringing me a different type of joy. One I never thought I would ever experience.
I have to choose. In either case, I will be disappointing a woman I respect. It’s just the latest test in a long line of tests.
Tests which I’ve failed repeatedly. This one is set up as a can’t-lose choice, either offering joy, fulfilling my desires. But it’s not what I pick that speaks to my future. It’s what I decide not to pursue that does.
I decide to trust my instincts. They have been spot-on lately. I pray I’m right. Betty fell for me because I was center stage, doing what I love. She knows the importance of the Sunday stage at Seaside means. I spit in the face of fate trying to make me choose. I’m Laredo Williams. I’ll figure out a way to have it all.
I tip my chin at Ariel. “I’ll play with you guys on Sunday.”