Chapter 9
Chapter Nine
HAZEL
B rady seemed irritated when he came into the bedroom.
Was it adjusting to having someone sharing his space?
In a few days, we'd get over the awkwardness.
Then things would get back to normal. I wouldn't feel all tingly inside when I was sitting on his lap or content when I snuggled against his chest.
I sat at the edge of his small pool and let my feet dangle, wondering how nice it would be if this was my life.
Brady opened the slider, blocking Max from exiting. "You can't come with us this time, bud."
"You broke his heart," I said when I saw Max's dejected face on the other side of the door.
Brady smiled at me as he walked toward me. "I want you all to myself."
My heart skipped a beat as he held his hand out to me. I took it and let him assist me to standing. With his free hand he grabbed two chairs, and I slung my bag over my shoulder. I fully intended to enjoy the beach and forget about any worries.
Brady set the chairs on the beach, and I laid the towels on the sand. I sat down on one, stretching my legs in front of me, enjoying the warmth of the sun.
Brady stood in front of me.
I raised my hand to shield the sun from my face. "Why are you blocking the light?"
He cocked his head. "You're not going to sit on a towel all afternoon, are you?"
"What did you have in mind?" I asked, my heart taking flight. Everything with Brady was so fun but I wasn’t a huge fan of swimming in the ocean.
He flung a thumb over his shoulder in the direction of the water. "Let's go for a swim."
I took long walks, hunted for shells, and read paperbacks, but I rarely went in the water.
He raised a brow. "I'm not taking no for an answer."
"Ugh. Fine." I stood, pulling the cover-up off my body and letting it drift to the towel.
His eyes sparked with something. Was it desire? Then he turned and took off for the surf, calling over his shoulder, "Last one in is a rotten egg!"
"What are you? A child?" I muttered as I kicked off my flip-flops and jogged after him.
He dove effortlessly into the swell of a wave. I took my time, moving more slowly in the water, adjusting to the temperature.
"Come on, slowpoke," Brady taunted as he ran his hands over his hair, then ducked himself under. As he stood to his full height, the water dropped from his skin, and it was difficult to draw a deep breath.
His body was sculpted with ridges and valleys and miles of tan skin. There was a smattering of chesnut-colored hair on his chest that made me want to touch it to see how soft it was.
I'd avoided looking at Brady directly, especially when he was shirtless. I knew I'd react this way, and I wanted to avoid the unassailable truth—I was attracted to my best friend, and the desire wasn't going away. It was morphing into something bigger than I ever could have imagined.
"Get in here. You're all pink.”
I moved slowly through the water, reluctant to get too close to him but knowing I was flush with desire, not the heat from the sun.
When I was close, he reached out to snag my hand, tugging me closer to him as we rode the swell of a wave. "Isn't that better?"
It felt good to be in the cool water, but it was scary too. "I don't normally come out this far."
He held me more tightly to him as we rose with another swell. "Don't worry. I've got you."
His hand covered my lower back, sending tingles of desire through my body.
I gripped his biceps, scared to let go. I could swim, but I wasn't very strong.
Not a match for the riptides present in the ocean.
I'd always preferred the relative safety of the beach.
You couldn't get hurt if you stayed on the sidelines.
Which seemed to be a good metaphor for life in general and especially my relationship with Brady.
"Wrap your legs around me," Brady murmured in my ear, and I gave him a look.
"I can hold onto you easier, and you can enjoy the freedom of being in the water. Trust me."
I sighed because I did trust him. It was me I couldn't trust. But I couldn't tell him that.
I hopped so that I could throw my legs around his waist, and his hand landed on my ass, pulling me tight against him.
His palm seared through the thin material of my bikini bottoms, and my core nudged against a hard ridge.
Suddenly, I was hot all over, and there was this roar in my ears that had nothing to do with the waves crashing near the shore.
"Isn't that better," he murmured into my ear.
I nodded jerkily, not trusting my voice.
"Now each time a swell lifts us up, feel what it does inside your body. Is your stomach weightless? Do you feel like you're floating, or do you feel like a small toy at the mercy of the ocean?"
His words were a good reminder that he wasn't affected by my proximity, not like I was to him. I could barely concentrate with his hand cradling my ass and my center rubbing against his hardness. But I forced myself to focus on his words and to at least attempt to figure out what he was saying.
When the next swell lifted us with it, I let go, giving into the weightless sensation.
"What did I tell you. It's a cool feeling."
"It is," I agreed, fixated on his full lips and boyish expression. He was enjoying being in the water, and I was calculating how easy it would be for him to slide my bottoms to the side so that his fingers could ease inside.
I felt heavy with desire, my nipples forming hard peeks underneath the material of my top.
"I thought you'd enjoy being in the water, but you're always reading on the beach or hunting for shells."
"There's nothing wrong with that."
"I wanted to see if you could enjoy this too. With someone you can trust."
I met his gaze. "I trust you. I always have."
He raised a brow. "With your body and your heart?"
I laughed off his words. "Why would I need to trust you with my heart?"
"Because this situation we've gotten ourselves into is intense. It's a mind fuck. And I don't want either of us to get hurt," he said seriously.
"Don't worry. There's no chance of that." As long as I remembered that he wasn't into me and this attraction was one-sided.
We played in the water, riding the swells for a while.
Then we made our way back to the shore and dried off in the sun on the towels.
It was the perfect afternoon. And the best part was that I didn't have to leave.
There was no reason to go home at the end of the night.
We'd talk about what to eat for dinner, prepare it together, clean up, then watch something on TV while cuddling on the couch. It was domestic, and I liked it.
"Is living on the beach everything you imagined?" Brady asked.
"It's even better. It's like being on a permanent vacation. The beach is always there for me to enjoy."
"I missed it when I was in college."
"The good thing is you're never far from a beach, living in Florida." We'd both gone to schools in state, not wanting to travel far from our families.
"There's just something about the island. It gets into your blood, and you can't let it go."
"I have to agree with you on that." I opened my eyes to find Brady leaning on one elbow, his legs stretched out in front of him.
"I've always imagined raising kids on the island, watching them surf the waves or throw a football on the sand."
"You've thought about having kids?" This was something we hadn't talked about.
"It's a vision I get every once in a while, a dark-haired boy asking me to throw him the ball or a little girl who needs me to haul water in her sand bucket.
" He inclined his head toward the family that was enjoying the beach farther down.
They were making frequent trips from the water to their towels, where they were building a large sandcastle and moat.
"You want a family."
He sighed. "After the way I grew up, I suppose it was inevitable. I crave a large family. Especially now that Luna’s getting serious with Axel, Hudson’s dating Elena, and Dalton is having a baby and moving out.
It seems like the next natural step, even if Shep and Coop aren't moving in that direction. "
"I guess it would be." I moved my feet in the sand, enjoying the warmth on my skin.
"Have you thought about what you want?" His voice was soft.
"I always wanted to work at the library on the island and live on the beach.
The second one seems so out of reach. I feel like I can't even think about marriage and kids.
If I can't afford a house, what kind of life would I be offering a family?
I can't raise a family in an apartment. I've been reading a few financial books, and the advice is to get a new job and make more money.
But to do that, I'd have to move off the island. "
"I don't want you to move," Brady said tightly.
"I don't want to either. But I don't see how this dream is going to come true for me." I turned over onto my stomach, settling my head onto my folded arms.
Brady sighed heavily. "I wish I could make things easier for you. That real estate wasn't so crazy expensive."
I smiled. "You have no control over that."
Brady looked down at me. "You can tell Ivy to keep an eye out for cheap options. I'll help you renovate."
I closed my eyes tightly so he wouldn't see the emotion those words conjured. "I can't ask you to do that for me."
"That's what friends do."
"You've already done so much for me."
"You're the one who moved in with me and is filming my show—" Then Brady broke off like he'd just had an idea.
He shifted on the sand. "You know you're working when you're filming."
"That was part of our agreement."
"Yeah, but look at how my viewership has increased with you on those two shows." He pulled out his phone and scrolled to a site that indicated his viewers and ratings.
I sat up to see it better. "That's from me?"
"It's all because of you. More viewers means more advertising and more money. You're the reason why I'm going to be earning more money. You should continue filming with me, and I can pay you. It would be like a second stream of income."
"I couldn't do that. You should keep the money."
"Hazel—"
"Brady—" I said stubbornly.
"Do you have any idea how much I make doing this show?" he finally asked.
"A few thousand a month?" I guessed, knowing that all the kids wanted to be streaming stars these days but not really knowing how it worked or what the appeal was.
He pulled something else up on his phone, and I sat up to see it better. It was a listing of the most popular streaming shows that focused on video games. "Oh, my god. Millions? I had no idea you could make that much money."
"I'm not making as much as those guys yet. But the possibility is there."
"Why didn't you say something before?" I asked him.
"I didn't tell anyone about it because they wouldn't understand.”
I frowned, trying to understand his logic. "But if you told them how much money you could make, wouldn't they have to respect it?"
Brady shook his head and chuckled. "Money is meaningless to my dad. He would use that as reason to think it was a waste of time."
"How so?"
"He'd think I was chasing money or fame. I never thought it would take off or that I could monetize it. I've kind of blown up over the years. I think it has more to do with the popularity of the video game than me."
"I would think your personality makes a difference. The kids like to watch you."
"Viewership has increased since you started filming with me. So maybe you're right."
"Of course I am. It matters who you are and whether they like you."
His forehead creased. "Will you let me pay you a portion of my earnings? It's only fair."
"I'm not sure that's the right thing to do. It was part of our agreement that we help each other."
"And so far, you've done far more to help me than I've done to help you."
"The engagement party is coming up soon, and Grandma has high expectations. We'll have to play the part of the happy couple in public." Just the thought made me nervous. I hated lying to my grandmother and friends, but we didn't have a choice. Not if we wanted our plan to work.
"It's one night. We've got this."
"I'm glad you're feeling so confident." I was more worried each day. Living together behind closed doors would be easy compared to acting like a couple in front of our closest friends and family.
"We can spend more time practicing kissing if you think that would help."
I rolled my eyes to cover up the interest I was positive was showing in my gaze. "I don't think we'll be making out in front of my grandmother."
"I think you underestimate her. She'll want us to kiss."
I snorted. "I don't think so."
"Remember how people clink the glasses to get the couple to kiss at weddings?"
I frowned. "You don't think they'll do that at the engagement party, do you?"
Brady grinned as he lay back on the towel, his arms folded behind his head. "Miss Mabel will be leading that movement. You watch."
"Ugh," I collapsed onto the towel next to him. "You're probably right."
"The point of this is to give Mabel a show. She wants to know that you're happy and in love, and we're going to prove that to her."
The only problem was that none of it was true. We didn't love each other as more than friends. I was the only one affected by these kisses. Would she see right through us, or could we make it believable? "I want this to work."
He lifted on one elbow, a smile playing on his lips. "We're going to look like the most in-love couple they've ever seen."
I sucked in a breath, wondering how we'd pull it off.