Chapter 4 #2
She opened her mouth to say something, quickly thinking better of it and pressing her mouth into a flat line instead before she gave a small nod.
She still hadn’t looked at me, and I suddenly found myself desperate to stare into her eyes to try and figure out what was going on there.
“Phoebe?”
Her chin rose, and she carefully glanced my way, squinting against the sun, not saying anything as her gaze met mine.
“Are you okay?”
“You’re asking me if I’m okay?”
“I am.”
“Why?”
“Because you just got mugged, and even though I’m not your favourite person, I’m also not as heartless and cold as you think I am. I want to know you’re not about to go into shock or anything.”
“Don’t worry, Henry. I wouldn’t expect you to give me the kiss of life if I passed out.”
Jesus. “Stop being smart and just answer me.”
She tried to swallow discreetly, but I caught it. “Yeah, I’m okay.”
“Sure?”
She nodded once.
“Good.”
The look of uncertainty on her face made me turn away, needing to see something other than those hypnotic eyes for a moment.
They had the power to draw a dragon in and make him lay down to turn all his fire in to water.
Instead, I leaned back on my hands and watched the other people around the pool enjoying their midday cocktails or getting lost in reading a book or their e-reader things while I let the sun beat down on my chest. I tried to focus on all my senses to distract me from the one thing that wanted to suffocate me more than anything.
Her.
Remembering the grounding technique my shitty therapist had given me after my parents had died did nothing to help me either, no matter how hard I tried to focus.
Five things I could see: The pool. The ocean. The guys. The other guests. Her.
Four things within reach to touch: My hair. My arm. My chest. Her.
Three things I could hear: The girls’ laughter. The water. Her.
Two things I could smell: Her. Her , goddammit
One thing I could taste:
I fucking hated this game.
“I—”
“You—”
We spoke at the same time, cutting each other off before we’d even begun, and I forced myself to look at her again, wondering what she’d been about to say with that one word she’d spoken: You.
This time, a small smile curved her mouth upwards, and a hint of a blush broke out on the apples of her cheeks. “Sorry, you go,” she said, gesturing to me with a feeble wave of her hand.
“It wasn’t anything important.”
“Oh. Okay.”
“What about what you had to say?”
“Nope. Not important.”
Phoebe glanced over her shoulder, and I followed her gaze to find Andy, Jace, Rhea, and Bailey staring at us as though we each had horns growing out of our heads.
The knowing look on Jace’s cocky face made the tension return to my shoulders, and I scowled at him before turning away.
I didn’t need him causing any more problems between Andy and me than there already were on this trip.
“Dickhead,” I muttered without thought.
“Which one?” Phoebe asked. “Jace?”
“How did you guess?”
“I thought the same thing when I saw him looking at us that way. Why did he just wink at me?”
“Probably because you’re talking to me.”
“Huh?”
“He thrives on causing awkward atmospheres. Don’t worry about it.”
“As long as he knows nothing is going on here.”
I turned to look at her too quickly, almost pulling a muscle in my neck. “Going on?”
“You know.” Her cheeks definitely turned redder then. “This is just a conversation. I’m not looking to partner up on this trip like Andy and Jace are trying to do with Bails and Rhea.”
Her rejection shouldn’t have stung as much as it did—I wasn’t looking to partner up with anyone, either. Still, my pride took a hit, and my internal walls of defence rose taller and mightier than ever before.
I huffed out a sarcastic, barely-there laugh. “You think I’m trying to hook up with you?”
“No, I mean?—”
“I can assure you, Phoebe, you’re the last thing I want right now.”
Her face fell, and for just a split second, it felt like someone had stabbed me straight in the fucking heart with my own knife of self-destruction. I wanted to apologise immediately for taking my issues out on her, but I didn’t have time.
Phoebe licked her lips and shook her head before she huffed out some indecipherable words of insult my way and rose to stand, brushing off her toned arse cheeks with the palms of her hands as she looked down at me in disgust.
“Then, consider it my pleasure to remove myself from your presence. Sorry you had to slum it with the least desirable woman around here for a few minutes.”
“That’s not?—”
But she was walking away back to the others before I could respond, leaving me to sigh heavily, let my head roll back between my shoulders, and look up at the cloudless sky in frustration.
Unfortunately for me, the distance she put between us still wasn’t far enough, because the moment she dropped down beside Andy, and he asked her what had happened, everyone around the pool must have heard the hatred in her response.
“Your friend is the biggest arsehole I’ve ever met.
Why you chose to spend two weeks on holiday with him, I’ll never know.
I think I’d have more fun and find better company in prison,” she said with a frustrated sigh, leaving me to stare up at the sky as my heart raced wildly, my stomach turned aggressively, and my mind gave up completely.
It was the same old, same old.
Too bruised to be carefree.
Too angry to be thoughtful.
Too bitter to be gentle.
Too tired to even care anymore.