Chapter Nineteen
Summer
My torn clothes raised a few eyebrows as we left, but neither James or Axe said anything and Rob looked embarrassed for me. His eyes flickered between both Bhodi and myself before turning back to the rags left on the warehouse floor and I could see the fire rise to his cheeks. After Bhodi called James to get rid of the body, they’d agreed to bring Rob along, allow him to see the body and for Eva to get some closure knowing that deceitful prick is now dead and can’t hurt her again.
Apparently, she had asked to come along but they thought it would be too traumatic for her, after everything he’d put her through. Part of me wishes he was still alive so I could watch Bhodi kill him over and over again. Death feels far too easy for someone as cold and calculating as him. Part of me wonders how they all do it, night after night, take lives and then go about their regular days as though they are just average people, with jobs, homes and regular errands to run. But that’s when I realised, they are exactly that. They aren’t a multi-million-dollar group of elite killers, secret agents, superheroes or even assassins, they’re regular people. Broken by the failing and limited justice system, tired of trauma, watching the criminals go free and being able to live their lives whilst the ones they’ve hurt are either dead or will never be the same again.
I finally understand.
Closing the door behind me, Bhodi leans against the hard surface as I turn around, tugging at the hem of his sweatshirt that just about covers my ass. Luckily the corridors and parking lot were quiet at this time, so we snuck back in. When our eyes meet, I feel the shift between us, like it initially did when he finally told me the truth about who he was, but it was so easy to slice open Daly’s throat and watch whilst he died, it was as easy as making coffee and that sends a shudder through me.
Could I ever do that myself?
I ask myself. I almost did, but Bhodi wouldn’t allow it and looking back after a few hours to process it all, I’m glad he didn’t. I was angry from what I heard and stabbing him was a knee-jerk reaction to what I found out. I would have continued to hurt and stab him over and over, to hear the cries of pain and the satisfaction at the frantic agony he was in, but to deliver the final blow, seemed so final. All this makes me think is that I’d be happy to torture him after everything he’s done but putting him out of his misery isn’t what I’d be ready to do.
“I know what you’re thinking.”
Bhodi looks to me, a seriousness crosses his face, and I swallow hard, fearful he can hear my thoughts.
“What?”
I ask, open mouthed and wide eyed. The panic in my voice is evident and he just smirks.
“You’re concerned.”
He pushes himself off the door and strides forward. “You liked it, didn’t you?”
I stare up at him, my mind swarming but it’s just a massive puddle of words, nothing makes sense, and I can’t think straight. A heavy knot sits in my stomach, but after a moment I slowly nod.
“Yes.”
“The first time…I guess it’s…unusual.”
He shrugs. “Does it bother you because you enjoyed it, or because you want to watch it happen again?”
“Both.”
I suck in a breath.
“There’s a darkness in you, Summer, something you’ve kept buried for far too long. But I couldn’t let you kill Daly, you were too angry. I saw the look on your face when he told the truth…your Dad, and Luca. I couldn’t let you do something you would later hate yourself for.”
“Do you hate yourself?”
“Yes, two people fight inside me and sometimes I wonder who will win. I wonder if my soul is worth saving, and up until a few weeks ago I didn’t care how long I lived. I was one person with nothing, but then I found you.”
I feel my entire body tense at the statement, the weight of our love and need for the other at times feels like I can’t breathe. As though it’s strangling me, not because I don’t feel the same way, but because it’s intense, like nothing I have ever felt before.
I look towards the window, before turning back to him. “What answer do you need from me?”
I ask, needing to change the subject.
“The question?”
“Yeah.”
Bhodi’s eyes roam from my feet all the way up to my eyes, his jaw rocks from side to side for a moment, an almost shyness flickers in his eyes. But when he doesn’t say anything, I feel the confusion climb all over me. Like the moment you walk into a room and everyone goes silent, they know what’s going on but you’re oblivious, feeling silly and the butt of a joke. He swallows hard but looks away and runs a hand through his damp hair.
Taking my hand in his, he gently kisses the back of my hand before leading me towards the bedroom and into the bathroom. Leaning in the doorway, I watch whilst he begins to fill the tub with water, the bubbles quickly foaming followed by a sweet smell of lavender. I breathe in the comforting fresh scent, still unsure and confused by Bhodi’s statement over the last few hours. The adrenaline, anger, sadness and deceit I felt was quickly wiped away when he took me in his arms, it was replaced with fire and something far deeper, we’re bonded by our desire for the other. It’s like a white-hot flame, something I’ve never felt before and I can’t imagine feeling it again with anyone else. Even the thought of being apart again makes my heart hurt to the point I fear it’ll break and leave nothing behind but shattered pieces of my soul, far too small to ever fit back together again.
Lost in my internal fears, Bhodi pulls me into the bathroom and lifts me onto the sink. His palms slide up my bare thighs, leaving goosebumps on my skin and a bolt of electricity shoots up my spine.
“I love you, Summer,”
he whispers.
I can’t help the warm smile that spreads across my face, his emerald eyes gleaming with love and admiration.
“I love you too, Bhodi, so much.”
My eyes finally meet his, I smile back. The scene before me a stark contrast to the blood and gore from earlier.
Taking the hem of his baggy sweatshirt, he peels it away from my skin and lifts it over my head. Leaving my naked body exposed, and still marked with his dried blood. I feel the fire begin to swirl through my entire body, each flash of memory causing my breath to catch in my throat. The blade against my flesh, his blood painted onto my body, each thrust, moan and being at his mercy. I feel every fibre in my body reawakening, allowing my body and mind to relive the moments over and over again.
Bhodi reaches behind me, pulling my hair over my left shoulder and gently twisting a loose wave around his finger before looking back to me.
“What’s your answer?”
He speaks softly, as though we are the only two people left in the world.
Taking a step back, he looks into the mirror. A smirk briefly passes across his face, and I feel the confusion contort my expression further. Slowly turning around, I blink a couple of times before my eyes widen in pure shock. My jaw falls open, before finding his reflection looking back at me. I lower my gaze back towards the words painted onto my skin in blood.
“Will you marry me?” I mutter.
My words are barely audible, and I feel as though the ground beneath me has broken away. Those words have been painted onto my flesh for hours and I didn’t know, Bhodi has patiently waited for an answer to a question I had no idea had even crossed his mind. My neck immediately snaps to face him, my eyes wide and jaw slack. I just blink, unable to push my brain in gear to say anything. It feels as though time stands still, my gaze lost in his whilst the hot tears fill my eyes. Placing his palm onto the marble top, he leans in close to me, his eyes dark and wetting his lips slightly.
“What do you say?”
Before I can answer, I feel my entire body tense as the phone in his pocket begins to ring. Followed by his own irritated groan of frustration at the abrupt interruption, I practically lift off the unit as my heart hammers in my chest, the silence of the room broken.
“Fuck sake.”
He speaks through gritted teeth and fumbling through his pockets, I watch whilst his hands tremble and for a moment, I’m not sure if it’s from rage or nerves. “What?”
He bites down the phone, before his entire body stiffens and confusion is quickly replaced with anger. “Fine, you know where we’ll be.”
“What’s going on?”
“Come with me.”
Throwing the sweater back at me, I wrench it back over my head in a panic as he pulls my arm towards the door. As he leads me to the stairs, he doesn’t let go, his grip on my arm tightening and my feet are barely touching the carpet as I skid.
“Bhodi? Please?”
I plead, watching the veil begin to descend over his face.
Passing two flights of stairs, he pulls the door open and checks the hallway up and down before pulling me through the door and I find myself face to face with a different hotel room. Banging impatiently a couple times, I hear the clicking of the lock before the door opens an inch.
“Eva, you need to come with us.”
She pulls the door open, confused, she looks between the two of us.
“What’s…”
“Doesn’t matter, move. Now!”
Both Eva and I jump at the harsh command. Eva slams the door closed as we all head back down the stairs, our footsteps clattering and thundering on the steel surface, my heart pounding in my chest and eventually I begin to feel the hot burning at the tops of my thighs, but refusing to stop, I push through until we reach the parking lot door. Pushing it open, Bhodi clicks the fob in his hands and we make a beeline for the black car parked in the corner of the lot. The area is empty, our heavy breath and footsteps seem to echo throughout, and soon I feel the hairs rise on the back of my neck. Refusing to stop and acknowledge it, I swing the passenger door open and secure the belt around my body. Within seconds the final door slams shut and the screeching of tyres fills the vast space and we head directly for the exit. My fingers grab fistfuls of leather and hold on for dear life as we swing onto the street.
I remain quiet, with no idea what’s going on, where we’re going or what the fuck to even say. The car speeds through the still bustling street, weaving in and out of lanes, taking sharp turns that I’m sure we’d never make without some serious damage to the car, but Bhodi remains in control, his hands fixed on the wheel and his eyes lasered to the roads ahead.