Chapter 17 #3
He met her eyes, and saw the trace of anxiety in hers, and heard the wobble in her voice. Like him, she was a little overwhelmed, and she looked like she was ready to bolt. There was no way he was going to let that happen.
He glanced around—the scuffed floor, the mirrors, the bench, and the stereo system—and let himself smile.
“Because I’ve had the best time with you in this studio,” he said.
“Whether I was trying to dance, or just watching you dance, or talking to you after you danced, I just love being here with you.”
Wren leaned back on her hands, head tipped toward the window. To Dane, it felt like the night, the stars seemed to be holding their breath, all deeply invested in their love affair. There was magic in the air…
Dane placed their wishes-and-regrets notes on the floor between them.
“You didn’t throw yours into the fire?” she said.
“I figured it would do me more good if you saw what I regretted and wished for.”
He wasn’t wrong. She picked up his note, reading his regret, then his wish. When her eyes met his, he caught the sheen of tears turning her green eyes luminous. Yeah, they’d keep these scraps of paper, one fire-scorched, forever.
Wren picked up her note and frowned. “I thought I threw this into the fire,” she said, puzzled.
“It blew out and landed on my foot.” He held up his hand and shook his head. “Don’t ask me how. I have a theory, but you won’t like it.”
Then she read hers—I wish for someone who will always love me, who’ll stay … and never leave—frowned, and read it again. “Hold on…”
He looked at her, not understanding her confusion. He peered down at the note. “Please don’t tell me I picked up someone else’s note after all this.”
She shook her head, now a bit pale. “No, it’s my note. But it’s not the one I wrote tonight.”
“Sweetheart, I don’t understand what you are trying to tell me,” he said, a little scared by her reed-thin voice.
Her eyes, when they met his, were a combination of shock, laughter and exasperation.
“I wrote this note when I was a kid, shortly after my dad told me I couldn’t live with him and that I had to live with Luna.
I threw it into the bonfire on Halloween night fifteen years ago.
” She pointed to the tiny heart above the i in will.
“I used to put hearts over my i’s when I was a teenager.
Besides, this wasn’t what I wrote earlier. ”
“What did you write?” he asked, his heart in his throat.
“It was similar, I wished that you’d choose me and stay.” She bit her bottom lip. “Both my present and long-ago wishes came true.” Her brow furrowed and he knew what she was about to ask next. “But God, Dane, how? How did this note come back?”
He took the note, laid it on top of his, thinking it would be a reminder of this night and how they came together.
“Let’s not go down the ghost, paranormal, how-come-weirdly-fantastical-shit-like-this-only-happens-in-H-Town rabbit hole,” he suggested.
“We can spend the rest of our lives trying to work the mystery of how your note came back from the past.”
She looked like she was racking her brain trying to find a rational explanation, and she sent another puzzled look at the notes. Then she nodded.
“I’ve loved every minute of this summer spent with you, Dane,” she told him, sounding too serious. “I didn’t realize how much until now.”
He echoed her stance, stretched out his long legs, and tipped his head, unable to look at anything but her. He thought he’d start with the easy stuff, work their way up to the hard. “You did well today, sweetheart. With the kids. It was brilliant.”
She smiled at his praise, and he spoke again. “Slightly harder question. Alex? You done?”
“Called him, told him. He wasn’t that surprised, to be honest.”
“No residual feelings?” he asked his follow-up question, knowing the answer but needing to make sure. “Not even a flicker?”
She smiled. “None, I am very over him. I’m even over everyone thinking he created the dance that went viral. I don’t care anymore. I’ll create something bigger and better, maybe even inspired by you.”
The sparks she ignited now glowed brightly and warmed him from tip to toe. “You can create anything you want, just don’t expect me to dance it with you.”
She laughed. “Oh, trust me. That’s a hard no from me.”
Oof. Right in the ego.
Wren lifted her legs, bent them, wrapped her arms around them, and rested her chin on her knee. “I know I was demanding the other night.” Right, she was diving straight in. He could too.
“I’m sorry,” she continued. “In my defense, I didn’t know what to do or say. I’ll do better next time.”
He rubbed his jaw. “And next time I’ll take however much time you need to explain what’s happening, what I expect, and how long I’ll anticipate being away. I won’t go until you feel utterly secure. In me and in us.”
The smile she gave him was full of gratitude. And trust. She believed he would do as he said, and that was … well, that was everything.
Dane wanted to hold her, but he knew there was more to say.
“I heard your conversation with your dad today, Wren.” He saw her surprise and explained how he’d been trying to approach her at the time.
“After listening, I now understand why my rushing out, without explanation, would trigger you. I won’t do that again. ”
Wren wrinkled her nose. “I feel better for confronting him, but I can’t promise that I’ll always be the model of understanding when you have to leave.”
“I can’t promise to always get it right either, but I promise I will always try.” Needing to touch her, he picked up her hand and linked their fingers. “Besides, I promised Luna that I’ll always put you first. If I don’t, she’ll order the H-Town coven to hex me.”
Wren smiled. “Luna’s understanding of the witches’ code, ‘first, do no harm,’ is fluid, at best.” She ran her index finger over his wrist. Her eyes turned serious, and she pulled her bottom lip between her teeth.
“Talking about Luna, what was that about you being H-Town’s new doctor?
And why aren’t you really on your way to Kashmir, Dane? Don’t they need you?”
He thought about how to answer, knowing how consequential his words would be, aware of his emotional armor dismantling.
He no longer needed it, not with her. “Humanatus has a roster of surgeons, and someone from the other teams can fill in for me. I’ve filled in for my colleagues when life happened. ”
“And is that what happened to you? Life?”
“No, you happened.” Dane met her eyes. It was time to get real.
“I came to H-Town needing to regroup, burned out, and a little overwhelmed. I needed to recharge, to get a grip on my mild PTSD symptoms, to rebuild my defenses so that I could go back to being the slightly robotic workaholic I’ve been for the past ten years.
” He looked for words, picking up some, discarding others, before mentally shrugging.
He didn’t need to find the perfect phrase; he just needed to be authentic.
“My identity, my value, how I saw myself, how my father saw me, have always been tied up in how I perform, what I do, how I do it. I wasn’t able to be the super soldier my father wanted, but I believe I serve, in my own, completely-unacceptable-to-him way. ”
Wren frowned, her nose wrinkling. “Of course you serve,” she insisted, conviction coating her words.
He smiled slightly. “But here, in H-Town, I’ve made friends, I’ve had fun, I fell deeply in love, and none of it is related to my work. No one judges me on what I do.”
“Or don’t do,” Wren stated. Amusement flashed in her eyes. “But let’s be clear, I absolutely judge your inability to dance.”
“And I absolutely judge your inability to perform a pericardiocentesis.”