19. Cedar #2
“Moving to their marketing team. They are expanding the department because of the company’s growth. She’s creating a position for a social media analyst, and she thinks I’ll be a great fit.”
“What about you? How do you feel about it?”
“I’m looking forward to the opportunity because it will give me a chance to learn something new, put existing skills to work in a new way, and the beautiful part is that I’ll get a fifteen-thousand-dollar annual salary increase. I’ll be making eighty grand.”
“The position hasn’t been created, and you already know the salary?”
“When I said we’d been in talks, this has been happening since the week that you and I separated. We’ve had detailed conversations. She’s creating the role regardless of if I take it or not, although she really wants me to.”
“What does Heather say about it?” I asked about her existing manager.
“She’s supportive of it.”
“So what’s the holdup?”
“I wanted to discuss it with you first.”
“Even knowing we weren’t in a good place, you put the role on hold?”
“Even then. I hoped that we would work through our differences.”
“Okay, what about your schedule? Will you still be able to work from home a few days a week?”
She broke into a wide smile as she licked her spoon, prolonging the answer.
“I’ll be one-hundred-percent remote. It’ll be up to me if I want to come into the office for any reason.”
“That’s wassup, baby. So, if you’re just looking for my approval, shit, you got it. That way, you can be home with our boy until we’re ready for him to go into daycare.”
“Yeah, I was thinking somewhere around two or maybe three years old.”
“Sounds good to me.”
We sat back and finished our ice cream. I pulled her out of her seat when we were finished and set her in my lap. Nuzzling her ear, I sucked it into my mouth before I asked a question.
“Do you know why I call you Sunny?”
“Yeah. As a nickname for Sunday.”
“Nah, I call you Sunny because you’re easy, like Sunday morning.
Slow and easy in temperament, full of happiness, joy, and all the sweet promises that the day holds.
Your smile radiates sunshine, and your easygoing personality has brought sunshine into my heart, giving me hope that I could love again.
Even when we went through our darkest times, you made me want to experience love and believe that it could be worth fighting for. ”
“I’m so sorry that I took you through all of that, CJ. I never meant to hurt you. You’re such a good man, and all I’ve wanted is to love you and take care of your heart.”
I wiped her tears with my thumbs and brushed my lips against hers.
“Like I said, life comes with its challenges, and nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes, baby. What I don’t want to do is make another mistake.”
“What do you mean?”
“After we learned that you were pregnant, I told you that I’d do whatever it took to make sure you and my baby were good, including giving you my last name.
I threw that out there randomly, but it wasn’t really random, Sunny.
Long before you were pregnant, I knew that I never wanted to lose you from my life.
We had this attraction that we played around with, but I didn’t think I could ever be comfortable enough opening my heart again.
“Whenever I dared to dream about doing it, it was always with you. I imagined what it would be like to have you as my wife . . . to come home to you in my bed every night and morning . . . for it to be you who I would start a family with. I knew my ass didn’t deserve you, and I never thought I’d be able to make you happy.
So, I pushed that shit aside and created a wall to keep you out.
“So no, my marriage proposal was never random. And while you were away, I realized even more how important you were in my life. I was incomplete without you. I called out four days straight for the first time in my career. I lay my tired ass on that couch and actually fucking shed a few thug tears.”
Sunday leaned back and stared at me in disbelief. “You cried?”
“Hell yeah. But don’t tell nobody that shit.”
“I find that very hard to believe,” she scoffed.
“Ain’t no shame in my game, baby, not with you anyway. I was sitting around thinking about your smiles, how you ain’t got no rhythm, and your no-dancing ass must’ve got that from ya daddy. Nigga look like he ain’t got no rhythm.”
She laughed and nodded. “I did, because my mom can dance her ass off.”
“Mm-hmm. Can’t sang either.”
“Boy, shut up.” She pushed me on the shoulder.
“But I missed all that. I even missed how you fucked up my laundry by tossing a few red items in with the whites on a few occasions and pouring bleach in that shit. Got me walking around with pink shirts and socks.”
We both laughed over that one because it had happened far too many times. I’d had to throw some stuff out and replace it on multiple occasions.
“But it made me realize that I love everything about you, baby. The good and the bad, I love it all. So, the love in my heart isn’t just about you carrying my seed.
And it goes deeper than the friendship we’ve built these last few years.
My love for you is built on your beautiful soul, your easy spirit, your ability to love and be loved, and your belief in others. ”
I moved my ice cream container to the side and picked up the small velvet box.
“My love for you is steeped in my belief that you are the other, better half of me. That my life took the journey that it did because God knew that you were the one for me. My love has no beginning or end, Sunday.”
Tears poured down her face as she stared at me and then back at the box. I popped the lid open and showed her the fourteen-karat white gold halo engagement ring in a pavé setting.
“Sunday Birgitta Monroe, will you marry me?”
She was inhaling and exhaling like her ass was about to have a panic attack, and then she calmed down and exhaled slowly.
“Yes, CJ. I will marry you, and I promise to never withhold anything from you again.”
“I know, baby.”
My heart exploded when she kissed my lips. This woman had the power to make me or break me, and she chose to use her love to build me stronger. She chose me, and I chose her.