23. Dolly
23
DOLLY
There is this very specific feeling—one without a name—that lasts only a split second, but stays with you forever. That half a heartbeat as it leaps into your throat, and you’re so sure it’s going to stop, never to beat again. But that’s more than okay, because the elation you feel for that fleeting millisecond is worth it.
I’ve been chasing that feeling since I was a tween. Ever since the girls and I watched Casper , wide-eyed and barely breathing, as Devon Sawa whispered, “Can I keep you?”, unknowingly setting the bar for romantic encounters for the rest of our lives.
A feeling I was sure was fictional. One that I would only ever feel when characters like Casper whispered well-crafted lines like “Can I keep you?” or some book character pulled off an epic grovel.
Until today.
Until Huxley Hayes told me he missed my curves.
The door of my Jeep opens seemingly on its own, making my pulse skip and my breath catch. I exhale slowly, forcing the air from my lungs, the sound lost to the click of my seatbelt filling the still air.
“Allow me.”
Hux’s deep voice rumbles through me, goose bumps scrambling up my skin, any coherent thought I had flying right out the open door. I was already pushing it driving over here—the short trip via well-worn off-road trails over the Hayes property one I probably could have done in my sleep—my mind focused on something that was not the heavy machinery I was operating.
More like heavy petting…
Strong arms wrap around me—one sliding under my knees, the other behind my back—as Hux lifts me out of my car, kicking the door shut behind us. The move is so swift, simple, and easy, I’d almost think he’d rehearsed it. But there’s something about the way he holds me, drawing me in close, positioning my head on his shoulder in the perfect spot to nuzzle into the crook of his neck, that tells me he hasn’t. Why, I’m not sure. But I know.
This move is one that belongs to me. Only me.
“You don’t have to carry me all the way upstairs,” I say, as we cross over the threshold of the cottage and into the small foyer, the staircase leading up to the second floor to our right, with the office adjacent to it and the long narrow hallway that leads to the rest of the house off to the left. I know this house well, the knowledge of its layout comforting as it greets us.
“Not a chance,” Hux replies, tightening his grip on me. “One, holding you like this isn’t just for you, baby, and two, Gus will have a cow if you track all that mess from your dress in here.”
Oh, I didn’t even think about the dress being wet and muddy…
Taking the steps quickly, Hux steals a kiss, not letting my thoughts take over.
“But mostly number one…”
Swoooooon…
A few weeks ago, I would have told you I knew everything there was to know about Huxley Hayes. Everything.
I would have been wrong.
Because I had no idea there was this side of him. That buried deep under this gruff, non-conforming, tattooed, ear-gauged lumberjack exterior was…this. I don’t even know what to call it. Whatever this side is though, it’s making me fall for him. Hard.
Electricity crackles through the air, Hux’s fingertips grazing along my bare skin as he sets me down, before tracing along the laces of my corset. Everything is so alive, part of me is surprised sparks didn’t fly the second his skin touched mine.
“Do you remember how to undo it? Or do you need a pair of scissors?” I ask, a weird mix of emotions taking over.
Swallowing hard, I try to tamp down this swirl of emotions. Something about this feels big. Different. Even after the last few weeks as we explored a different side of our friendship, this feels like another step past that. An even bigger one.
“I remember.” Cupping my cheek, Hux runs a thumb across it, his calloused skin rough and dry. His hazel eyes hold me in place, my heart calling out to him, wanting him to make a move. To do something. Anything. “I’ve imagined this moment more times than I should probably admit to.”
Me too…
“Then what are you waiting for?”
Hux chuckles, the single breath of laughter coming out short, stunted, as if he’s chastising himself for not seeing my challenge coming. It doesn’t motivate him to move any faster though. If anything, it’s the opposite.
Stepping in to me, he cups my other cheek, lowering his head to mine. His lips linger right above mine for a long moment however, just out of reach, his breath tickling my skin, like it’s whispering a secret. Taunting me with the knowledge of everything that’s to come. With each passing second, I grow more desperate for his kiss, for the feel of him against me.
Then he’s there.
Lips capturing mine—soft, sweet, but still in charge—making my knees wobble. I whimper into the kiss, losing myself in it, in him, in everything we are together. In all that we could be. This is how I want to be kissed. From now until forever. Nothing else exists when I’m being kissed like this.
Hux deepens the kiss, his hands weaving their way around my body, taking their time on all my curves, like a sports car hugging a coastal road. I lean in, enjoying the feel of them, his words from earlier still echoing through my brain, heightening the moment.
“As gorgeous as this dress makes you look, even trashed, I think it’s time we get you out of it.”
Nipping at my ear, he spins me around, mouth not wasting any time finding the sweet spot on my neck. Oh, shit… My eyes flutter shut. The flash of desire that move sent coursing through me, my pussy now wanting in on the action, has me on high alert. Damn, Hux.
“Doll,” he says, nibbling at that spot again. “The next time you wear one of these, I vote for a zipper.”
My heart stops.
The corset of my dress loosens, my insides constricting more and more as the fabric gives way, as it all hits me. I suck in a breath, blinking back the tears, Hux’s warm hands sliding inside my dress, stealing my attention briefly, before hammering home what I think I’ve always known but couldn’t admit. Until now.
It should have always been Hux Hayes taking me out of this dress.
“Oh…fuck…”
Hux’s groan is punctuated by my sopping wet gown hitting the floor, his own realization coming out in a much more verbal form.
“You’ve been naked under that all afternoon?”
I turn to face him, unable to hold back my smirk. My heart is ready to burst, the rest of me set ablaze and so turned on it’s not funny. Still, I manage to control myself. Barely.
“Like what you see?”
“You have no fucking idea.”
His hands are back on me in a flash, pulling me into him. He’s still fully clothed, the damp fabric cold and rough against my skin, heightening my senses. I’m on high alert, already feeling like I could ignite, even from the simplest touch.
A touch that I’m craving. That my body is calling out for.
One that only this man can satisfy.
Slowly dragging a single fingertip down my spine, Hux teases me, drawing out the moment. As if he knows that my insides are screaming for him already. That the need for him is trying to climb out of me. That if given the ability, I’d burrow myself inside him. A place I know I’m safe. Accepted. Adored.
“I want to do unspeakable things to you, Dolly.”
I shiver, the finger on my spine not relenting, even with his deliciously gruff words.
“Then do them.”
“Not now.” His voice deepens, eyes going dark. “Don’t you worry, I will. But right now, there’s something more important.”
“What?”
“Making you mine.”
The whole world stops. My heart, my brain, my breathing—all cease to function. That nameless feeling takes over again, hovering right there , making me lightheaded as the room spins.
Make you mine…
Those three words might have just replaced can I keep you as the most perfect thing a boy has ever said to a girl.
I nod, unable to do much more. Because how exactly does one respond to that? Please? Thank you? Fuck, yes?
A kiss.
That’s how.
It’s what Wendy asked of Peter, after all.
I push up on my toes, closing the small distance between us, gently pressing my lips to his. It’s sweet, innocent, and borderline chaste, especially given that he’s already kissed me harder, and I’m naked, but it’s more about the response than the action. About letting him know I’m already his. I have been since that day on the playground in the third grade.
He responds in kind, slowly drawing out the moment, kissing me in return like we have nowhere to be. Like we have a lifetime to stand here, kissing, caressing, with no agenda or goal. No outside demands or lives to return to.
I lose myself in the moment, in the movements, in the feel of him like this. We continue, losing track of time, until Hux slides his hands to my ass, lifting me up in a move so smooth it feels like we’re dancing a ballet. A very dirty ballet.
Laying me down on the bed, he starts to work his way down my body, his beard tickling my sensitive skin. I giggle, unable to hold it in. That is, until he moves to my breasts, taking a taut nipple in his mouth, rolling his tongue over it.
“Gahhhh…” I cry out.
“Just wait ’til I get to what I really want…”
Oh fuck…
I wiggle underneath his grasp, my core already on fire knowing exactly what he means. He doesn’t even have to say it. Hux has made it very clear how much he enjoys the art of coaxing an orgasm from me via his tongue. And he’s damn good at it. To the point where the mere thought of it makes me wet.
“Please…”
“Yeah?” Looking up at me, he slides farther down my body, spreading my legs, settling in between them. My pussy starts to tingle, Hux licking his lips as he stares down at me. “You saying you want my tongue on you?”
Placing a kiss on my inner thigh, he runs a finger though my wetness, spreading it through my folds, carefully avoiding my clit. I whimper, the contact too much and not enough, leaving me desperate for more.
He does it again, this time drawing large circles around the throbbing bundle of nerves, like he’s outlining a bullseye. Zeroing in on his target. I try to shift, moving my hips in the direction he’s going to go, but he’s on to me and pulls away.
“Oh, Dolly…naughty girl…”
“Hux!”
He chuckles, the borderline-evil sound reverberating off his bedroom walls and through me. It fuels the need in me, making me even more desperate. And he knows it.
Light, sweet kisses pepper the insides of my thighs and then all along my hips, as he prolongs the tease. The punishment for trying to take control. Although if having Hux’s mouth on me is a punishment, then I’ll gladly misbehave all day long. I’ll find all sorts of new ways to get up to no good, just so that he and I can end up like this and?—
“Fuck!”
Hux’s tongue hits my clit like a dart to a balloon, sending me soaring. All my synapses fire at once, sending me throttling into space. I see stars, unable to think or breathe as I grasp at anything I can to hold on to. In the distance, I think I hear Hux chuckle again, the vibration of his laughter against me as he continues to work his magic more than I can handle. Wave after wave of indescribable pleasure takes over, my orgasm not slowing down but speeding up, everything around me stopping.
My letdown is easy, my soul drifting back down to earth like a feather floating in the wind. Soft, serene clouds envelop me as I open my eyes, inhaling deeply, drinking in Hux’s unique scent. Wait, no…that’s not clouds. That’s Hux.
“Fuck, are you beautiful when you come,” he whispers, pressing his lips to my forehead and wrapping his strong arms around me fully.
He’s naked, his skin warm and welcoming. Rolling us over, he settles on his back, holding me in place as he turns his focus back to my breasts.
“I need you inside me.” My voice is breathy, wanton, almost to the point where I don’t recognize it. “Now.”
“We need a?—”
“No.” I shake my head. “I’ve never…not even with…” I trail off, not wanting to say my ex’s name in this moment. “I saw Doc Galindo right before the wedding. I’m healthy.”
“Same.”
Gripping on to him tighter, I tell him what I want. No, need. “I want to feel you. All of you. Just you. Just us.”
Lifting his hips, Hux grips mine harder, trying to shimmy me down his body. “Slide on down.”
I hesitate for a split second, my own self-consciousness taking over, despite my admission. Being on top—being on display—is not a position I’ve ever been very good at. But that was before. Before I was with someone who liked my curves.
Hux sees my waver, running his hands up my sides to my rib cage and sitting me up. My heart jumps, pulse kicking into high gear, his eyes landing on me and going wide in an instant.
“I want to watch you,” he says, his voice full of gravel, hands roaming over my breasts. “Want to watch you become mine.”
Fuuuuck…
Just like that, all my insecurity flies out of my body. The fire in his dark eyes tells me everything I need to know. All the want and desire he feels. All the care and devotion.
I am his. And he’s mine.
I move down his torso, dragging myself along his smooth skin, leaving a trail of wetness in my wake. Hux groans, his own way of telling me to hurry the fuck up, but it’s my turn to tease now. He’s had his.
Lining myself up with him, I grab his length, stroking him long and hard. That earns me another moan, this time accompanied by a glare. I’m on to something. Time to kick it up a notch. I press the tip of his dick against my clit, teasing myself right along with him, licking my lips and moaning, just to see what happens.
The unhinged, feral growl Hux lets out makes the walls shake. To the point where I’m pretty sure if I wasn’t holding his dick, he would have tried to tackle me.
“Dolly…” he lets out through gritted teeth.
I nod, sharing his sentiment. Enough teasing. I was ready for him a while ago and all I’ve done is drag it out.
Realigning us, I slowly sink onto him, letting him fill me, enjoying the feel. From this angle he hits all the right places, almost instantly, sending a sharp shudder straight down my spine. My eyes flutter closed and I take a moment to settle in.
That moment doesn’t last though, as Hux shifts underneath me, changing the angle and magically finding an even better one, causing me to cry out. I lurch forward, but Hux catches me, kissing me like his life depends on it.
We continue to move like this, finding a rhythm all our own. One where our bodies do all the talking. His hands continue to roam my body like he’s committing it to memory, the look on his face making me feel like I’m the most beautiful woman on earth. Like we are the only two people on this planet and nothing matters but us.
“You have no idea what you do to me,” I mutter, the telltale tingle starting to build in my belly.
“Right back at you, beautiful.”
Reaching up, Hux takes my hands, interlacing our fingers, joining us together. Tears prick at the corners of my eyes, all the feelings that are hovering right under the surface—all the ones I’m not ready to confront—trying to push their way out. I blink hard, trying to push them back, not ready to put a voice to those not so little words that are threatening to slip out.
“Right now,” he continues, “what I want to do is make you come. So I can watch you fall apart.”
His free hand snakes between us, thumb finding my clit with ease. It doesn’t take much—a few swirls of the rough pad of the digit and I’m done.
“Faaaaaa…”
Fireworks explode around us, my whole body shaking as my climax rips through me. Flashes of technicolor fill the backs of my eyelids, clouding my vision. The only things I can focus on are the pleasure racking my body and Hux’s roar punctuating it as his own orgasm strikes.
Yanking me closer, his fingers dig into my skin, the mix of pleasure and pain dancing through me, conflicting with the heat radiating off of Hux. I collapse into him, my heart racing, our heavy breaths mingling.
“You know what I’ve always wanted to do?” Hux asks after a long silence.
I push up, resting my head in my hand. “What?”
“Cook for you.”
Cook for me? What the…
“Huxley Hayes, it’s a sin to lie!” I playfully scold, giving him a shove.
He laughs, yanking me into him. I snuggle in, resting my head on his chest, sighing as the thump, thump, thump of his heartbeat takes over.
“I mean it. I think it could be fun if I made you dinner. Not always. Maybe just once. It’ll probably suck, but…” He lifts a shoulder, moving my head with it, and I can’t help but smile.
“How about I walk you through how to do it?”
“I can cook.”
I glance up at him, scrunching my nose. “Can you though?”
“I can! I’m damn good on the grill; you know that.”
“The grill is not cooking.”
Hux lets out a huff, moving so quick you’d think he was the Flash, scooping me up out of bed.
“That’s it, we’re going to the kitchen so I can prove you wrong!”
I giggle. “We’re naked!”
“So?”
Hux starts toward the door, stopping abruptly as Gus’s voice calls out.
“Hey, y’all home?”
I try to hold back another giggle, but it doesn’t work. Instead, my heart melts and I think I fall for Hux a little more, the realization that I want this to be my weekend every weekend hitting me.
Which also scares the fuck out of me.
“Yeah. Be right down,” Hux calls out. “Okay, so not naked.”
Depositing me on the ground, Hux kisses me sweetly, looking disappointed.
“Next time,” he says, as if it’s a promise.
I nod, a lump forming in my throat. One made up of three very important words, blocked by a sudden unnamed fear.
All of which we’re going to ignore.