Chapter 9
9
I’d intended on driving back to Newcastle first thing on Friday morning but I was still buzzing from meeting Oliver and Rosie at the quiz and the possibility of working on Willowdale Hall. When Georgia suggested breakfast at The White Willow before I hit the road, I accepted without hesitation.
‘You’re thinking about Willowdale Hall, aren’t you?’ she said after we’d placed our orders. ‘I can tell because your eyes are shining and you haven’t stopped smiling all morning.’
My smile widened. ‘Tell me it wasn’t a dream.’
‘It was real.’
‘I’m trying not to get my hopes up as I’m sure they’ll want to talk to other conservation architects, but we’re talking Willowdale Hall here. How long have I been obsessed with that place?’
‘Only for forever. Remember when you built a replica of the hall out of Lego?’
‘I still have it in a box somewhere, although I think it might be in several pieces now. I’ve got stacks of drawings too.’
I’d filled so many sketch pads with drawings of the outside from different angles, imagining the parts that weren’t in photographs. For some of my interior designs, I’d returned the hall to how I’d imagined it would have been in its heyday and, in others, I’d modernised it into a variety of alternative uses including a luxury hotel, a spa, a hospital and a school. I looked forward to hearing about the vision Oliver and Rosie had for its future, particularly as it sounded like they intended on living there themselves. A dual-purpose design would be interesting to work on.
‘If you get the job – which I know you will – how will it impact on your other projects?’ Georgia asked.
‘It shouldn’t be a problem as I’ve always juggled my workload.’
‘And what about moving back here when most of your projects are in the north-east?’
‘Are you trying to put me off?’ I asked, my tone teasing.
‘No! Never! Just being practical.’
‘It’ll be fine. I covered the north-east when I lived here before – just means further to travel when I’m needed on site.’
‘I’m beyond excited you’re coming home, but…’ A shadow crossed Georgia’s face, stirring the butterflies in my stomach.
I shook my head. ‘I don’t want to talk about Flynn.’
Our drinks arrived, pausing our conversation, but Georgia clearly wasn’t ready to let it go.
‘The last thing I want to do is make you doubt your decision to return, but have you thought about what you’ll say when you see him?’
‘I don’t intend on seeing him.’
‘Maybe not intentionally, but you’re bound to bump into him at some point, probably sooner rather than later.’
I stirred my latte, keeping my eyes down, but Georgia gripped onto my hand, stopping me from moving.
‘Mel! Please look at me.’
I raised my eyes, sighing heavily.
‘You won’t be able to avoid him forever. This isn’t a big place.’
‘I don’t want to think about it,’ I muttered, feeling like a petulant child. ‘I mean it, Georgia. Conversation’s over.’
But as I drove back to Newcastle, seeing Flynn again was all I could think about. I pictured his dark curls, the tenderness in his green eyes and his dazzling smile. And then I pictured the hurt and confusion when I left and I shook my head, trying to dislodge it from my mind. I hated that I’d hurt him when he was already in pain but, if I’d stayed, I’d have only hurt him more.
* * *
By the time I arrived back at the flat, I felt weary and my head was pounding. Unable to face diving straight into work, I made a strong coffee and stood in the kitchen, resting my back against the chipped worktop, sipping on my drink and trying to empty my mind.
Georgia had shared something unexpected while we were in The White Willow – that Mark had stayed in touch with Flynn and the pair of them met up for drinks at least once a month. I was still reeling from that revelation.
‘I thought it best you know now,’ Georgia had said, her wary expression suggesting she had no idea how I’d take that news. ‘Gives you a chance to get your head round it before you move back. If you need to, that is. Might not bother you.’
I’d given my usual copout response of, ‘I don’t want to talk about him,’ and rapidly changed the subject by admiring the décor of The White Willow. But it did bother me. A lot. And I knew it was totally unreasonable of me to think that way. From the moment I’d introduced them, Mark and Flynn hit it off and soon developed a strong friendship. We often went out as a foursome and holidayed together before and after the kids came along. Neither of them had siblings and it was as though they’d found the brother they’d always wanted.
When Flynn and I separated, I never asked or expected any of my family to cut him out of their lives. When we divorced, I told them all that I didn’t expect anyone to take sides but I did have one important request. If they did speak to Flynn or even meet up with him, I didn’t want to know about it. Our marriage had ended badly and the only way I was going to be able to get through it was if I severed every tie to him. I therefore understood why Georgia had kept Mark and Flynn’s ongoing friendship from me.
‘I know you said we weren’t to pick sides but I was always going to be Team Mel,’ she’d said. ‘I’ve exchanged pleasantries with him if I’ve bumped into him but I’ve never joined him and Mark on a night out.’
‘I wouldn’t have been angry with you if you had.’
‘I know. But I would. I’d have felt disloyal.’
She shouldn’t have had to make that decision. The four of us had been a tight friendship group. Just because Flynn and I had divorced, it didn’t mean Georgia and Mark had to divorce him too. I’d just assumed that, over time, they would have done. When he’d met up with Mark, had Flynn asked after me? Had they talked about me?
Earlier in The White Willow, I’d been adamant that I didn’t want Georgia to tell me anything about Flynn but now my mind was alive with questions. Where did he live? Had he managed to build another successful business? Had he returned to general construction or was he still doing restoration? I’d loved running a business with Flynn. I’d heard many disastrous stories about couples clashing and strong relationships ending when they tried to work together but, for us, joining forces professionally had strengthened an already solid relationship. We’d made a great team and the business had thrived. When we split up and I reverted to working on my own, I’d struggled at first. I hadn’t realised how much of a sounding board Flynn had become and there’d been a period where I’d floundered, battling with my self-belief.
My thoughts drifted away from work and onto Flynn’s personal life. Was he seeing someone, perhaps even remarried? Had he had more children? And was it wrong of me to hope that the answer to those questions was a resounding no?
‘Nothing to do with you,’ I muttered, tutting at myself for heading down that road.
I tipped the coffee dregs into the sink and dumped my mug beside it. I’d allowed my ex-husband far too much headspace and I really couldn’t go there because, even though I was determined to make the move, I still wasn’t 100 per cent sure about my return to Willowdale and I didn’t want thoughts about Flynn to panic me.
Hoping that losing myself in my work would silence the questions, I wandered over to my desk and plonked myself down on the chair. My heart pounded when I clicked onto my emails and spotted Rosie’s name among the list of unread messages.
To: Melanie Finton
From: Rosie Jacobs
Date: 31 January
Subject: Meeting to discuss Willowdale Hall
Hi Melanie
It was lovely meeting you last night and congratulations on coming third in the quiz. We were third too – from the bottom! Oliver and I were inspired by the love and passion you clearly have for Willowdale Hall and we’re excited to meet you to discuss your work and our plans for the future of the estate.
Oliver’s a GP and I run the riding stables so the best time to catch us both is a Sunday afternoon. If Sundays don’t suit, I’m sure we can work something out. I look forward to hearing back from you and hopefully to working together this year.
Best wishes, Rosie
Talk about going from down in the dumps to high as a kite in the space of thirty seconds. My hands were shaking as I typed in a reply.
To: Rosie Jacobs
From: Melanie Finton
Date: 31 January
RE: Meeting to discuss Willowdale Hall
Hi Rosie
It was lovely to meet you too. I wish I could take some credit for third place at the quiz but, sadly, I contributed nothing! Congratulations on your place. It would be a lifelong dream for me to work on Willowdale Hall. Georgia and I were just talking earlier about how I built the hall out of Lego when I was younger. I’ll have to see if I can piece it back together to show you. Sundays are good for me. Is this coming Sunday too soon for you?
All the best, Mel
A reply came back a few minutes later confirming they were free and suggesting I meet them at the hall at 3p.m. I accepted immediately and sat there, shaking my head, stunned at the potential opportunity ahead of me. Working on Willowdale Hall would be the highlight of my career. What if I stuffed up the interview?
‘You’ve got this!’ I said, my voice strong. I’d dreamed of this since I was a little girl and there was no way I was going to throw it away. I always had a portfolio of work ready to show prospective clients and I had tonight and all day tomorrow to update it. Loads of time.