9 Cassius #3
“You didn’t,” she whispers, hands hovering like she’s afraid to grab him. “Cass. You didn’t.”
“He was judging me from a table on Wednesday.” I try for casual and land somewhere near nervous. “Figured he’d be happier with you.”
She takes him, cradling the stupid plush like it’s breakable. I watch her carefully trace her thumb over the little embroidered eyes.
I swallow, suddenly weirdly warm.
“And also,” I add, voice dropping before I can stop it, “because a heart’s a heavy burden, right?”
Her eyes flick up to mine, already glassy, recognizing the line from the movie.
“And you carry mine,” I finish.
The words hang there between us, soft and too loud all at the same time. Her breath catches and then there’s a dangerous shimmer in her eyes like she might actually cry.
“Cass.” My name is barely audible from her lips.
For a second, I start to panic.
That was too much. It was too soon.
You idiot.
Then she lets out a watery laugh that sounds like it hurts. “You can’t just weaponize Studio Ghibli like that. That’s emotional manipulation.”
“Yeah, well.” My throat goes tight. “I did.”
She sniffles, hugging Calcifer closer. “He’s perfect. I love him.”
A breath leaves my lungs finally. “Good. He was starting to judge my life choices from my dresser.”
She presses her face into the plush for a second like she’s hiding behind him. When she peeks around him again, there’s color in her cheeks that wasn’t there before.
“Thank you,” she whispers, and it’s not just for the toy. I can tell.
“Anytime.”
The room feels different now. Lighter, but not all the way back. Like a storm just passed and everything’s still damp.
I rock back on my heels, suddenly awkward. “So… it’s Friday.”
Her gaze snaps to mine warily. “Yeah.”
“Which means,” I continue carefully, “there are two large pizzas currently on order under ‘your favorite gremlins,’ and if I show up alone, my mother will actually murder me and hide the body where no one will find it.”
A reluctant smile tugs at her mouth. “That sounds like something she’d do.”
“So,” I spread my hands, “in the interest of saving my life, I’m gonna need you to come. Please. Think of the children.”
“We are the children,” she jokes, her tone easier this time.
“Exactly. Save us. Save me.”
She looks at Calcifer, then back at me. I can see the wheels turning. Part of her still wants to curl up in this room and let the static run wild. The other part knows what happens when she says yes to things that aren’t her bed and her worst thoughts.
“Pizza and Baldur’s Gate?” she asks, narrowing her eyes. “Or are you going to make me watch your skate videos for three hours as punishment?”
“Full package. Pizza, Dew, and Baldur’s Gate. There will be minimal violence, aside from the hacking and slashing Karlach is gonna do.”
She snorts. “You can’t promise that last one.”
“I can promise no intentional violence outside of the game,” I amend. “Unless you romance someone hotter than Tree Daddy, then all bets are off.”
She rolls her eyes, but her shoulders drop a fraction. “You’re an idiot.”
“Is that a yes?” I press, letting a little hope slip into my voice.
She studies me for a moment longer, then she nods. “Yeah. I’ll come. But you’re carrying Calcifer.”
“Deal.”
She hands him back with exaggerated care, like she’s entrusting me with royal cargo. I tuck him into my arm.
We hover there again, close but not touching. It feels weird not to bump her shoulder, not to nudge our fingers together. But I’ll take weird over nothing.
“I’ll change,” she says finally, backing toward her closet. “Meet you at your car in, like, twenty?”
“I’ll see you in thirty, then. I know you need ten minutes to lock the door,” I tease her, letting the corner of my lip twitch up.
She snorts, full-on this time, and the sound settles something in my chest.
“Asshole.” She rolls her eyes, but there’s no real bite to it. It’s just us.
“You secretly love it.”
She just shakes her head but doesn’t say anything for a moment, so I turn to leave.
“Cass?” she calls when my hand hits the knob.
“Yeah?” I glance back.
“I’m still mad at you. Just… not enough to skip pizza.”
“That’s fair. I’ll earn the rest back.”
Her eyes soften, just for a second. “We’ll see.”
I step out into the hall before I do something reckless, like cross the room and hug her until we’re both okay again.
As I walk toward the stairs with Calcifer tucked against my side, my mind jumps ahead.
To breaking up with Stacey properly, face to face, no more delays.
To group on Sunday and actually talking instead of shrugging my way through it.
To the look on Zae’s face when she sees herself beat another boss tonight and trash talk the pixelated corpse.
Tonight, I’m done being emotionally repressed.
Maybe I won’t say the exact words I’m in love with you yet.
Maybe I won’t dump four years of feelings in her lap all at once.
But I’m going to tell her the truth I’ve been dodging since the day she showed up at my locker in tenth grade, all witty and with a laugh that penetrated my stubborn heart.
My heart’s hers.
It has been, for a long fucking time.