15. Harlan
Chapter 15
Harlan
Jem: Adding Maisie into the chat since this was her hard work. Bet you wish you were here, suckers!
Jem: *Image of fajita plate*
Duke: Where’s mine? *sad face emoji*
Rhett: That’s dirty baby sis.
Rhett: *Image of empty fridge*
Finch: Sharing is caring Maisie.
Jem: You snooze you lose! *Tongue out emoji*
Jem: *Image of empty plate and wine glass.*
Boone: At least you didn’t eat cereal for dinner again.
Jem: Hush you. *heart emoji*
Hal: Hi, Maisie. It’s nice to meet you, even if it’s only via text. Dinner looks good.
Rhett: Daaaaaad. We’re trying to guilt trip her into feeding us next time. Get out of here with your nice pleasantries.
Hal: Rhett Bentley Calhoun. We do not guilt trip women. And I raised you to feed yourself. *irritated side eye emoji*
Finch: *GIF of mic drop*
Duke: *GIF of unicorn farting rainbow*
Rhett: *GIF of leaving the room*
Rhett: *GIF saying sorry*
Maisie: Nice to meet you, Hal. I’ll make enough for everyone next time. *blushing smile emoji*
Duke: I knew I liked you Maisie.
Jedd: Maisie! Show me the baby!
Finch: Jesus Jedd. Baby fever much?
Rhett: Go get your own baby.
Jedd: Fuck off Rhett. Maybe I will.
Boone: *GIF of It’s the End of the World as We Know It music video*
Finch: If you want a baby you go get yourself a baby, Jedd.
Jedd: *fist bump emoji* #brotherhood
Finch: And don’t listen to Boone. I’d bet he and Jem are planning to populate Everette with the next set of Calhouns as we speak.
Jem: *wide eyed emoji*
Duke: Now that’s a scary thought.
Jedd: God save us all.
Boone: Fuck off. Our children won’t be scary. They’ll be well behaved productive citizens of society.
Hal: *laughing crying emoji*
Duke: GIF of laughing uncontrollably
Rhett: GIF of disbelief
Jedd: GIF of girl with evil smile
Finch: GIF of explosions
Jem: I really don’t think our kids will be that bad guys.
Rhett: *Crying laugh emoji*
Duke: GIF of roaring laughter
Finch: You sure have the wool pulled over her eyes, Boone.
Boone: Shut up, Finch.
Jedd: They’re clearly still in the honeymoon phase.
Boone: You shut up too, Jedd.
Hal: Jem, honey. I love you, but sleep now, because once you start having kids you’ll never sleep a full night again.
Jem: Well that’s not a terrifying thought at all.
Rhett: It’s like she didn’t even listen to all the stories we told her about Boone and us growing up.
Maisie: *Selfie with a passed-out Audra cuddling on her chest.*
Jem: Worth it.
Boone: Yep.