19. Harlan
Chapter 19
Harlan
A udra’s sleeping in Maisie’s arms while her mama tells me about the meeting, and I don’t want the night to end.
After being caught off guard in the act of teaching Audra how to crawl, my brothers lit out of here like their asses were on fire.
Traitors. The whole lot of them.
Maisie’s eyes are lit up like beacons, and she waves the one arm not holding Audra as she tells me about meeting the ladies at business night and how they all loved her website ideas and suggestions. The high of triumph putting joy into her gaze for the first time since she woke up in that hospital bed.
And I live for it.
Each smile, each light laugh, every single expression of happiness on her face engraves itself into my head and heart until both are so fucking full, I don’t know what to do with them.
“I sold four websites tonight, Har. Do you know what a fricken relief that is? Not only will the money help — and that’s a huge thing all by itself, but they were all so nice and they didn’t pity me for being in a bad spot or look down their noses at me for traveling across the country with my daughter.”
I tune back into Maisie’s animated tale of how her night went, and I could kiss my sister-in-law. Not only for her welcoming Maisie into the fold, but for her help in bringing her into the community of Everette.
Audra grumbles in Maisie’s arms, and Maisie bounces her a little until she calms back down. When I look up again, Maisie’s eyes are heavy with tears.
“Whoa, why are you crying, Sunshine?”
“I, uh, I’m just happy and overwhelmed, but they’re mostly good tears, I promise.”
Oh Jesus. Thank God. “That’s good right? That things are working out?”
She blows out a breath that flutters the hair around her face. “So good.”
“I’m glad,” I say as Maisie looks down at her daughter.
Maisie’s silvery gaze finds mine, and she asks, “How was your night? Was she okay?”
I nod. “She was great. Didn’t fuss. My brothers showed up about ten seconds after you left, and she just kinda soaked up the attention from all of us.” I snag the notepad from the side table. “She ate a little bit at 7:30 — I got the honors there, though Jedd called me a baby hog. Then I changed her diaper at 7:45 — no mishaps to report there. We started tummy time at 7:55, and you walked in on us doing that at 8:30.”
A look of awe passes over Maisie’s face. “You kept notes?”
I scratch a hand through my beard. “Yeah. You seemed a little nervous when you left, and I didn’t want you to worry, so I took notes as the night went on.”
“How do you know what tummy time is?” My face gets hot at her question.
“I might have looked up a couple of things to do with a six-month-old.” The admission makes more heat blaze into my cheeks, and I really hope that Maisie doesn’t think that I’m a creep.
“Well, thank you. Cassie — your deputy — seemed a little surprised that you would be watching her for me, but Dawn said that you’d have her covered.”
Dawn’s known me since I was in diapers of my own, so I’d hope that she’d have faith in me.
“Yeah. Dawn was my mom’s best friend growing up. When Mom passed away Dawn kinda stepped into the pseudo-mother role for most of us. I don’t have a childhood memory that doesn’t have ‘Aunt Dawn’ in it, ya know?”
Maisie’s lips twist in a small frown. “I’m sorry about your mom. But glad that you had Dawn. Your dad still lives in Everette, right?” she asks.
I nod. “Yeah. He’s closer to town, but still out a ways from it. He runs the park ranger station here. You’ll probably meet him sometime soon.”
“Oh, I will?” she asks.
“Yeah. We usually do Friday night dinners at his place. Me, my brothers, and Jem all head over there to catch up. He told me to bring you this Friday, if you’re okay with it.”
Say yes.
I want to walk into my family home with her and Audra. I want to spend more time with her. Have her spend more time around us. Dad asked me days ago if I’d bring her, and I didn’t know how to bring it up until now. But I want her there — with me .
Maisie fiddles with Audra’s blanket for a minute before a small smile covers her face.
“Oh, uh, sure. We could do that. He won’t mind Audra coming?”
Thank God.
I shake my head. “Nah. He’s just as antsy to meet her as he is you.”
Maisie smiles at me before looking down at her daughter.
“I should probably get her to bed.” Audra’s conked out in her arms, and I hope that my brothers and I wore her out enough that her mama can get some sleep tonight. I don’t want her to go, but I don’t have any reason to keep her here with me without coming up with some asinine reasoning.
Plus, she could use the rest. From the sounds of it, she’s got her work cut out for her over the next few weeks.
“Okay. I’ll walk you up.” I stand and start to pack Audra’s belongings back into the diaper bag, but it doesn’t fit as neatly as it did when Maisie brought her over.
How the hell did she get this packed? I end up looping Audra’s blanket through the handle before slinging the strap over my shoulder.
Maisie’s hand on my arm stops me. “You don’t have to walk me, it’s like twenty feet away.”
I pin Maisie down with a stare even as I loop my fingers with hers. “I’m walking you. It’s dark, and you’re carrying Audra. Come on.”
“Fine.” She rolls her eyes at me, but is still smiling, so I take the win.
I lead her through the house — keenly aware that she’s behind me. Her hand fits into mine like it was made to be there. At the base of the stairs, I drop her hand. “You go first, just in case you stumble.”
“I have walked up stairs before Harlan,” she sasses me.
I don’t respond and just place my hand at the small of her back and usher her up the stairs. After unlocking and opening the door, we both step through.
Maisie reaches out and squeezes my forearm. “I’m just going to put her down, be right back.” She and Audra disappear down the hall, and I look over the small changes that she’s made to the space. Decorative towels hang from the stove, and there’s a rug in the living room with new lamps on the side tables. A knit throw is tossed over the back of the couch, and a few toys linger on the floor in the living room. She hasn’t been here long, but the place already feels homier. Like she’s settling in and that makes satisfaction soar through me.
“Sorry about that. Here let me take that.” She reaches forward for the diaper bag that’s still hanging on my shoulder, and I slip it off before setting it on the table.
“Thanks for watching her tonight, Harlan. I really appreciate it.” Maisie’s hands are twisted in front of her and she’s picking at her thumb.
Does she want to touch me again?
I want her to touch me again, but I don’t want her to be uncomfortable. Her gaze drops from my eyes to my mouth, and her tongue swipes across her own before her eyes find mine again. I’d swear there’s heat in them.
And I want to test it.
To test if she’s ready for something like this.
If she tastes as good as I think she does.
“Don’t panic, okay?” I say, reaching out with my hand and linking it with hers. I use my grip on her hand to tug her a little closer before I lift my other hand toward her face.
And. She. Doesn’t. Flinch.
There’s a wary caution in her gaze as I dip my head down until millimeters of air are the only thing that separate our mouths.
“Is this okay?” I ask, staring into that silvery blue.
I nearly miss her small nod as she swallows thickly.
That tiny nod is my permission, and I’m done for.
I close the distance. Brushing my lips against hers in a butterfly kiss. A light tease of pressure for us both before backing off. My lips tingle where hers were pressed against mine and the smell of her perfume goes straight to my head.
“Goodnight, Maisie,” I say as I step back.
There will be time to talk about the kiss and what it means later. But if I don’t walk out of this apartment — now — I’m not sure that I’d be able to, and I refuse to fuck this — whatever it is — up.
“Goodnight, Harlan.” Maisie’s quiet voice follows me out of the apartment, and I wait until I hear the deadbolt slide into place before adjusting the granite erection pressing against the front of my jeans.
“It’s going to be a long fucking night,” I mutter under my breath and start down the stairs intent on heading to my cold, lonely bed.
“You’re smiley as fuck today.” The voice comes from my office door, and I look up to see Jedd standing there. Out of all of my brothers, he stops in the most since his garage is close enough to walk.
“Smiley?” I ask, not looking up from my computer screen.
“Yeah. Smiley. You know, like this.” Jedd’s lips spread until he’s baring his teeth at me, the joker-esque spread to his lips… kinda scary .
“Stop it. I don’t look like that.”
Jedd drops the grin, and says, “No, but seriously. You’re glowing. Why are you glowing?”
“Glowing?” I ask, dumbfounded.
“Yes, glowing. Guys can glow too, Har, it’s not just for pregnant chicks. What happened?”
I start to shake my head, but then think better of it. What’s the harm in telling Jedd? He knows not to run his mouth, and I could use advice. Though I should probably be talking to Boone about this, since he’s the only one in a committed relationship, but I’ll take all the help I can get.
“I kissed Maisie last night.” The confession emerges as a gruff declaration. My office door is still open, and the men and women who work for me are the worst gossips. The last thing I need is for them to tease me about Maisie, or for this to get around the station — or worse — the town. While I don’t give a shit — I know Maisie will — and the entire town gossiping about us is the quickest way to send her running for the hills.
Jedd’s eyes widen as he whips his phone out of his pocket and he stabs furiously at the screen.
“What are you doing?” I ask, but I already know.
He scoffs at me. The sound saturated in sarcasm and disbelief. “What do you think?” he quips.
I think that in less than ten minutes my brothers are going to descend on this office and there’s not much that I can do to stop it.
And I’m right. It doesn’t even take the full ten minutes either before my brothers are crowding into my small office, sitting in the chairs or leaning against the walls.
“What’s the emergency meeting for?” Duke asks, running his hands down his thighs. Little puffs of sawdust float into the air with the action .
“Harlan kissed Maisie,” Jedd says, pointing to me, like he just announced to the whole playground that I have cooties.
“Jesus Jedd.” I rub a hand down my face.
“Nice.” Rhett drags the word out and tries to high five me, but I swat his hand away.
“How is this news?” Boone asks — attired in his ranger uniform. He must have come from work.
“What do you mean how is this news?” I ask.
He scoffs at me before tossing a smirk my way. “I’m a man obsessively in love with my wife, and I’ve seen how you look at Maisie. Don’t be dumb.”
Fair enough.
“Wait. Wait. You saw this coming?” Finch yells, and I slash a hand in his direction.
“Could you yell a little louder? I don’t think they heard you in the next county over,” I bite out.
Finch grimaces. “Sorry. You bringing her to dinner on Friday?”
“Yeah.”
“So, how was it?” Duke asks.
I don’t have the words to explain what the small kiss did to me. It was dangerous because — to me — it’s the start of a swift and scary fall into the unknown, but it also leaves a warm weight to my chest. The two conflicting emotions are distracting, and I’ve thought about finding a reason to find Maisie and extend the preview of that kiss more than once since last night.
Thank god for work.
At least work keeps my mind occupied enough that when Maisie pops into my thoughts every three seconds, I have something to keep me busy.
“Harlan’s smitten,” Rhett crows .
“No shit, Sherlock,” Duke says.
“Tell us something we don’t know,” Rhett agrees.
“You’re in so much trouble,” Boone says to me.
“Wait. I thought Maisie was leaving after she replaces her camper?” Jedd’s voice of reason pops the little bubble of my happiness.
Jedd’s not wrong. Maisie hasn’t said that she’s considered staying in Everette. I don’t know if that’s changed. The only thing I know about that situation is that she’s saving up to replace her camper and that she’s staying in my apartment until she does.
But what happens when she buys a new home on wheels?
I shake my head, not getting lost in the thoughts that far into the future. “I don’t know. We haven’t talked about it.”
My brothers expressions shift from the teasing smiles to something more cautious.
“It’s still new. I don’t even know if she’s interested in something with me.”
“Well did she kiss you back?” Duke asks.
I nod.
“Then maybe you should talk to her about it. Get on the same page.”
My brothers all nod, like cornering the raven-haired beauty that flew into my life like a bullet train and having a conversation about what the kiss means is easy.
But it’s not. Not when we’re just establishing a level of comfort and trust between us. Not when she’s still gun shy.
“Communication is the key to any healthy relationship,” Finch says sagely, and my brothers all nod along with him.
I guess I’m adding “have the relationship talk” with Maisie to my never-ending task list .
My feelings are already big enough that I know if she’s — if we’re — not on the same page, it’s gonna hurt.
But better to be hurt now, rather than getting in deeper with her and then being devastated when she leaves Everette in her rearview mirror.