Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
Joanna stood by the side of the road, staring at the vacant block. There was still some blackened debris and the remnants of the foundation where her restaurant used to be. Memories flooded through her mind, but they didn’t overwhelm her the way they used to. Did time heal all wounds, or was it her willingness to face the pain and work through it in recent years the way she hadn’t been able to in the past that had done it?
Time hadn’t helped her for years. But therapy and friendships, forgiveness and bravery had given her the strength to stand up to the panic and the anxiety that threatened to knock the breath from her lungs whenever she remembered the trauma of that time. For too long, she’d let it control her. But not anymore.
With a deeply inhaled breath, she looked up at a group of gulls that circled on an upwards breeze overhead. She closed her eyes and listened to the roar of the ocean beyond the dunes behind the empty block. This was what she remembered—the smell of salt lingering in the air, the cawing of the birds as they called out to one another, the monotone of the crashing waves. She loved it here, and she was so glad Gwen would buy and rebuild the place. It would give them all closure over what’d happened.
Her eyes blinked open as Gwen’s car pulled up behind her own, and Gwen climbed out.
“There you are! What do you think?”
“I’ve always loved it here. Such a great location. It’s going to be fantastic, Gwen. I can’t wait to see what you do with the place.”
“It seems so long ago that your restaurant was here… Sandpiper’s. I loved the name.” Gwen walked forward onto the block.
Joanna followed her, memories bringing tears to her eyes. “That was Ron’s idea. He wanted something that reflected the atmosphere of the place and was modern, since we served modern Australian cuisine.”
“I loved your dishes. They were the ultimate in comfort food, but with a modern and refreshing twist with its Asian infusion.”
“I’m glad you enjoyed it. I had a lot of fun putting the menu together.”
“Since I’m just starting out with this project and there’s a lot at stake, do you have any advice? What were some of the things you wished you’d known or would’ve done differently?”
Joanna sighed. “So many things. I think my biggest downfall was the grief I felt at losing Ron. I couldn’t focus or concentrate on the business. And it happened during an economic recession, so we were losing money before I even realised it. I was so mired in grief, I didn’t notice the business was sinking until it was too late. And then I did everything I could, but once you start haemorrhaging money, it’s hard to stop.”
“I wish I could’ve done something to help, but I didn’t know what you were going through. None of us did.”
“I couldn’t talk about it. You were there for me in the ways I needed you to be. You took care of my heart, helped me deal with the pain of losing Ron. Especially when all my children moved so far away. They thought I should be over it, but it wasn’t so easy for me.”
Gwen put her arm around Joanna’s shoulders. “I know it wasn’t easy. But you made it through. I’m only sorry you had to lose this place in the process. But maybe I can resurrect it for you. It won’t be the same, but it can be in your honour.”
“I would love that. I haven’t wanted to buy or rebuild it myself. I’ve certainly thought about it many times over the years, but I don’t want to go backwards. I want to move forwards. And I’m not a businesswoman. I tried that, and it literally burned to the ground.” She shook her head.
“That wasn’t your fault,” Gwen replied.
“I know it wasn’t. It was an accident. There’s nothing anyone could’ve done, although I wish I’d gone home instead of falling asleep at my desk. Then I wouldn’t have almost died in the fire.”
“I’m so glad you made it out.”
“You know, there are a lot of happy memories bound up in this place too. I was standing right about here, in the middle of the kitchen, when I found out I was pregnant with Karen.”
Gwen grinned. “Oh, yeah?”
“I felt sick, and then I noticed my breasts were sore. And I thought… No, I can’t be pregnant. We’re not trying yet. So, I went to do a pregnancy test in the bathroom and carried it back in here to the kitchen. There was no one else here yet because we hadn’t opened up. But Ron was in the small office behind the kitchen, and he heard me shout. He came running out, and he saw the pregnancy test. He beamed from ear to ear, picked me up and twirled me around. He was so happy, he had tears in his eyes. He kissed me and told me it was going to be the best time of our life. And he was right. It was. I was so happy.” Her throat ached over the memory, but in a good way. The remembered snapshots of her days, the happy moments and the hard, were the things that brought her peace and joy in her later years. She was grateful for every moment.
Gwen smiled, eyes shining. “How beautiful. It seems like yesterday, and yet so much has happened since then.”
“Karen has her own family now. It’s been so long since I’ve seen them, since they’re busy and I’ve been housebound for years. But now, I think I could manage a trip down to Melbourne to see them. I miss them so much.” Joanna longed to see her family again. She hardly dared to hope.
“That’s a great idea,” Gwen said. “You should book something for Christmas. It’ll be here before we know it.”
“Maybe I’ll do that,” Joanna replied.
“And after Christmas, do you think you’ll have time to help me rebuild this restaurant as a bistro?”
“I’m more excited about it than I can say.” Joanna winked. “It’ll have the best eats in the region.”
After Joanna and Gwen had finished walking through the empty block and thinking about how the bistro might look, and then the old bed-and-breakfast next door and picturing the renovations, Joanna drove home alone, her thoughts in a whirl. She had so many ideas, so many thoughts and plans to share with Gwen. The two of them had been like giddy schoolgirls.
Her mind was full to the brim with what could be done. But underneath all of it buzzed this one thought—Christmas in Melbourne. She could do it. She could manage to take a flight now, when she couldn’t in the past. Her anxiety was under control.
The airport would be full of people. The plane engine would drone and she’d be stuck in the sky for over an hour, and the idea of that made her feel tense. But she knew she could make herself face it, as she had so many other things in recent months.
She drove home, humming along to the radio. She felt happy. None of the women had complained about her doing the morning show alone. And with everything else that was going on, she hadn’t had a chance to talk to them about it. But they seemed fine—on the surface, at least.
She was happy to see Gwen moving on and tackling this exciting new project. Emily seemed to have settled into university well, although she didn’t get much sleep, if her late-night texts were anything to go by. No doubt she’d adapt to the study schedule before long. And Joanna had been spending more time with Chris, so her house didn’t feel as empty as it had right after Emily and Aaron moved out. Life was good.
She pulled into the driveway and waited while the garage door hummed up. There was someone seated at her front door. Whoever it was, they were perched on a suitcase. She squinted through her prescription sunglasses, then gaped in surprise. She could’ve sworn it was Eva, her granddaughter and Aaron’s little sister. What was Eva doing here? She lived in Melbourne. She’d probably finished her school year. Perhaps she’d come to visit. But why didn’t she call first?
Joanna was happy to see her granddaughter but worried about why she’d arrived with no warning. Karen wasn’t likely to send her to Queensland that way, since Eva was only sixteen and finishing up year ten in school. Maybe Karen was here as well, but that didn’t help Joanna feel any better about it.
She parked the car in the garage as the door whirred shut. Then she hurried out through the kitchen to unlock the front door.
“My goodness! Is that my darling granddaughter? What on earth are you doing here? Give me a hug.”
She pulled Eva into her arms and embraced her. Then, shocked, she stood back and looked down. Eva’s stomach protruded beneath her singlet top. She was pregnant.
She met Eva’s gaze. Her granddaughter’s cheeks were pink, and she shrugged. “Surprise.”