SEVEN
Madelyn
(One week before the wedding)
Rather than sit around my parents’ house, David and I decide to go out for a few hours. I’ve heard so much about my brother’s bar, I really want to go check it out. I’m happy he finally found something that he seems to really love.
When we walk in, I look around in awe. It’s fancier than what I’d imagined, considering they bought out and expanded the old firehouse. It has a kind of upscale country vibe. Wood, stone, and leather. Hardwood floors, exposed ceiling beams, more spacious than it appeared from outside.
The actual bar sits in front of a wall of alcohol and glassware, taking up the majority of the left side of the space. Stools line half of the bar top, the back wall is lined with tables with booths, and high-top tables surround the small stage that sits opposite the bar.
As we make our way toward the table in the back that Holden told me is reserved for family and friends, I introduce David to some old friends. I’m so distracted that it takes me awhile to notice the man watching me from the bar. When I do, our eyes lock from across the room. In my shock, I stumble before stopping completely, causing David to bump into me from behind. I quickly try to shake off the surprise. I don’t want David asking questions.
He knows very little about my past. He knows I’ve only had one other relationship, one that lasted through high school before we went our separate ways. He also knows I was dealing with that breakup when we met. He doesn’t know the details. Not about Jaxson. Not about the baby.
I quickly look away from the bar, ensuring David that I’m fine. We finally reach the table, but I feel Jaxson’s eyes boring into me the entire time. I sit facing away from the bar so I don’t have to look at him. Holden shows up a few minutes later and greets us happily, taking a seat next to me.
“Let me just grab a waitress,” he says, looking around.
David stops him, insisting he’ll grab our drinks. He excuses himself, leaving me alone with my brother. I don’t waste time.
“What the hell, Holden?!”
His head jerks quickly to look at me. “What?”
“Don’t play stupid. Why is he here? How could you not tell me he works here? That he’d be working here tonight?”
I glare at him hard. I don’t get mad at my brother often, but I’m really pissed that I’ve been blindsided with this.
“Watch your attitude, Mads.” He hits me with a glare of his own. “You’re not gonna sit here and disrespect me after everything I’ve done for you.”
My face softens. He’s right. “I’m sorry.”
He nods. “Now, if you hadn’t spent the last two years cursing anytime someone speaks his name, I would have told you. In fact, I tried to tell you several times, but at first mention of his name, you hung up on me and didn’t answer or return my calls for weeks.”
My eyes squeeze shut. I’ve been horrible. Not only to him, but to everyone.
“I’m sorry, Holden. I’ve been such a selfish bitch. Cami was spot on with that assessment.”
“Maybe a little bit,” he says, holding up his thumb and index finger just barely apart. He laughs, bumping his shoulder into mine. “But, you did what you felt you needed to do. Can’t change it, so just move forward.”
My head tilts in acceptance of his words.
“Now, if you’re ready to listen—I’ll explain.” He continues when I don’t protest. “The bar was Jaxson’s idea, his baby.” He cringes when he realizes what he said, but I wave him off. “I bought in and helped make his vision a reality. We’re equal partners.”
My mouth opens in shock, but before I can speak, he stops me.
“I’ve done everything you’ve asked, but I stand by my belief that he did nothing wrong. You may not want him in your life and that’s your choice, but he’s still one of my best friends and one hell of a business partner. You’ll have to come to terms with that.”
I start to reply, but notice David making his way back to the table.
“We’ll talk more later. David doesn’t know.” I whisper quickly.
He gives me a knowing look, but nods. He accepts his drink from David, thanking him.
“No problem,” he says as he hands me my drink. “What did I miss?”
“Just catching up with my brother,” I reply, smiling.
He glances back and forth between the two of us before nodding and turning the conversation to the bar. After asking what seemed like a million questions about Blackwood Brewhouse, we chat about school, the wedding, and our future plans.
Awhile later, David volunteers me to get the next round of drinks from the bar. Holden, sensing my hesitation and unease, offers to flag down a waitress.
“No need. Madelyn can handle it.” He winks, tilting his head toward the bar.
I stand, silently giving into his demand. Excusing myself, I make my way to the bar and wait.
Jaxson sees me instantly, holding up a finger indicating I should wait.
I don’t stop my eyes from wandering over his form, soaking up the sight of him.
He hasn’t changed much in the last two years.
He stands more than half a foot taller than my 5’7” frame. Strong jaw lined with more than a few days of scruff. He always did hate shaving. I bet his hair is cropped short under the baseball cap he’s never without.
He’s bigger now, more built than he was before. The muscles in his arms and shoulders flex and contract as he slings drinks behind the bar. His thick, muscular thighs are encased by a pair of tight blue jeans. My eyes wander to his ass as he leans over the bar top. Damn. Tight, round, and oh so bitable.
Shit. I shake off my thoughts. I shouldn’t be thinking of him like that. Not anymore.
He turns to me, motioning to the very end of the bar and moves that way. I have no choice but to follow.
“It’s good to see you.” His hazel eyes, bright and full of heat, roam my body.
The intensity in his gaze makes me squirm. “Hi, Jax.”
“Two years and that’s all I get? Hi?” He chuckles humorlessly and shakes his head, brows furrowed.
I shrug a shoulder, “I don’t know what you want me to say.”
He stares at me momentarily, then starts making our drinks without me ordering. He pushes them across the bar top without speaking. As I’m reaching out to hand him the money, he grabs my arm. His grip is rough, fingers digging into my skin. It takes a minute to register what’s happening, but when I do, I pull my arm back quickly.
“You’re engaged.” His voice is low, hoarse, angry. “You walk away from me without a word. Without telling me about our baby…”
I flinch. I’m not used to hearing this anger from him. Not toward me.
He continues, “and you come back with someone else’s ring on your finger?”
Jax takes a step back, turning away from me as his hands tug at his hair. He growls, turning to face me again.
“What the fuck, Madelyn? You were supposed to come back to me. You were supposed to come back so we could be together just like we always planned. We were meant for each other. You’re the one that told me that!”
I stay silent, motionless.
“You walked away like I meant nothing to you. No goodbye...” He inhales deeply, eyes closed tight, tugging at his hair again as he shakes his head. He stops to look at me. The pain in his eyes threatens to bring me to my knees. “I never stood a fuckin’ chance, did I, baby?”
I’m pinned by his stare. His eyes are full of tears, while mine threaten to spill.
“Jax, I…”
“It’s true, isn’t it? I meant nothing.”
I inhale sharply. “No! It wasn’t like that, Jax. I loved—”
“Loved?! I still love you. I’ve spent the last two years getting my life together...for us...but now…”
He stops. I can see the devastation in his eyes. I don’t know what to say. There’s nothing I can say. Not now.
He grabs my hand, his thumb rubbing back and forth over the ring.
“Please, baby. It’s not too late for us. I know it’s my fault. I didn’t protect you and I’m so fucking sorry. I was selfish, but I’ll never let you down again. Please.”
“I—I don’t know what you want from me, Jaxson.”
Tears spill down my cheeks. I didn’t know what to expect when I ran into him again, but it wasn’t this. I’ve never seen Jaxson look so...broken. I did this to him.
“You, Madelyn. I want you. Say you won’t marry him. Come back to me. Please.”
This. This moment.
The hope in his eyes.
Oh, God.
My breath catches in my chest.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
I watch him watching me, my eyes moving back and forth between his. I’ve done so much damage to this man. The words that leave my lips will only hurt him more. Cause irreparable damage. It doesn’t stop me from uttering them.
“That’s not possible, Jaxson. I’m in love with David and we’re getting married soon. He’s the one I want to spend my life with. I let go of you two years ago. There’s no going back.”
I watch as the last shreds of his hope vanish before my eyes. His eyes turn hard and cold. His jaw tightens, his expression going blank. He doesn’t speak, just nods and turns away.
I wipe my eyes, steeling my expression before grabbing the drinks and heading back to the table. David is alone, messing with his phone. He looks up as I slide into the booth.
“Where’s my brother?”
He looks at me, a hint of anger flashes in his eyes before it disappears. “One of the waitresses needed him for something.”
“Oh. I’m not feeling too great. Do you mind if we head out?”
He studies me, curiously. I hope I’m not giving anything away. I don’t want him asking any questions. I know that I should tell him more about Jaxson and my past, especially since he agreed to live here, but it’s just not something I want to talk about.
Without answering, he stands, extending his arm to help me up. “Let’s get home then, sweetheart.”
We abandon the drinks at the table, and he wraps his arm around me as we head for the exit.
“Who’s that?”
I look up, following his line of sight. Jaxson is standing with his arms across his chest, staring at us with an indecipherable expression on his face.
Tears burn in my eyes and my stomach churns when I reply, “No one important. Just somebody I used to know.”