Chapter 5
At first, Cal didn’t notice how quiet Bonnie had become. He was concentrating on the road and reflecting on the lovely couple of weeks he’d enjoyed with his daughter and his parents. He’d had a great time and so had Bonnie.
Driving back to Skye on Sunday morning, Cal felt exhausted – having a nine-year-old was knackering – but at the same time he wouldn’t have wanted it any other way, despite suspecting that he needed a holiday to get over this holiday. Bonnie was so lively. She rarely sat still and never stopped talking.
She was quiet now, though.
‘Have you had a good time?’ he asked.
‘Uh-huh.’ She nodded.
‘What was your favourite bit?’
Bonnie shrugged. When he attempted to meet her eye in the rear-view mirror, she was staring out of the window, her face turned away.
‘Go-karting? Boating? The adventure park?’ he tried.
Another shrug.
‘Are you tired? I know I am. We’ve been on the go since we got there. I bet Nana and Grandpa are shattered.’
Silence. Bonnie didn’t even acknowledge that he had spoken.
Cal refused to give up. ‘You’ve got loads to tell your mum, haven’t you?’
She glanced at him, caught his eye and hastily looked away.
Ah, so that was it. Bonnie was missing her mother. It didn’t come as a surprise. This was the longest she’d ever been away from her.
The knowledge stung, nevertheless. Regret that his daughter would rarely have both parents with her at the same time settled over him. It must be hard, and his heart went out to her. It mightn’t be his fault that he and Yvaine were no longer together, as she’d been the one to end it, but he felt responsible all the same. If only he’d—
He shook his head to clear it. There was nothing to be gained by recriminations or wishful thinking. And if he had never met Yvaine, then he wouldn’t have Bonnie, which was unthinkable.
‘I bet you’re looking forward to seeing your mum,’ he said. ‘I expect she’s missed you, too.’ He met Bonnie’s gaze again, before snapping his attention back to the road, dismayed to see the worry lurking in her eyes.
He was about to ask what was wrong when she said, ‘You won’t ever have a girlfriend, will you, Dad?’
To Cal it didn’t sound like a question. It sounded like a plea. ‘Probably not,’ he replied, keeping his tone deliberately light. He couldn’t promise he would never have a girlfriend (he had been on several dates over the past few years, although none of them had come to anything), but neither did he want another serious relationship.
‘I don’t want you to have a girlfriend,’ she persisted.
‘That’s OK, because I haven’t got one.’
‘I wish Mummy didn’t have a boyfriend.’
Cal stiffened. On full alert but trying not to show it, he asked casually, ‘Why is that?’
‘I think she likes Lenn more than she likes me.’
They’d just driven through the village of Achnasheen and still had well over an hour to go before they reached Skye, so as soon as he was able, Cal pulled over onto the side of the road then scooted around in his seat to face her. ‘Your mother does not like Lenn more than she likes you. She loves you with all her heart.’
‘But she went away without me.’
‘Yes, she did. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you. It just means she wanted to have some grown-up time, doing things you wouldn’t enjoy.’
Bonnie scowled.
Cal could tell she wasn’t convinced by his explanation. ‘Who is your best friend?’ he asked.
‘Katie, duh!’
‘What do you do when you’re with her?’
A frown creased Bonnie’s brow. ‘We play make-up and dolls – but don’t tell anyone because Alisha in school says that playing with dolls is lame. And we sometimes play computer games, or we draw, or make stuff.’
‘Next time you go to Katie’s house, or she comes to yours, it might be nice if you were to ask Mum to play with you.’
Bonnie’s expression was horrified. ‘But we—’ She stopped, realisation dawning. Then she scowled again. ‘It’s not the same.’
‘No, it isn’t,’ Cal agreed. ‘But would you really want to go wine tasting with Mum and Lenn, bearing in mind that you wouldn’t be allowed to taste any? Or would you be happy to sit at a table for three hours eating dinner?’
‘No.’
‘You’d be bored, wouldn’t you?’
‘Maybe.’
‘And you wouldn’t want to lie on a sunlounger all day, snoozing, would you?’
‘Ugh, no.’
‘That’s what Mum and Lenn have been doing. You’d have been bored out of your noggin. Besides, if they’d taken you, I wouldn’t have been able to spend my holiday with you. We had fun, didn’t we?’
Her nod was emphatic. ‘Yes.’
Thank goodness for that. He’d tried his hardest to ensure she’d had a good time.
Unfortunately, Bonnie wasn’t done with him yet. ‘But if you did have a girlfriend, you would have taken her on holiday and not me. ’
‘I wouldn’t.’
‘You would. You’d want to do grown-up things with her, the way Mummy wanted to do grown-up things with Lenn. What is wine tasting?’
‘It’s when— Look, I haven’t got a girlfriend, so it’s a moot point.’
‘What’s a moot point?’
‘It means it’s irrelevant.’
‘But you might have one.’
‘How about if I make you a promise not to have a girlfriend?’
‘Never?’
‘Never. At least, not until you have a boyfriend. Deal?’
‘I’m never having a boyfriend.’
‘Never is a long time.’
‘So is two weeks.’
Cal started the car. ‘Let’s get you home. Your mum will be wondering where we’ve got to.’
Bonnie didn’t look quite as anxious, but Cal wasn’t fooled. She definitely wasn’t happy that her mum was seeing Lenn. He didn’t blame her, because he wasn’t happy either.
His reason was very similar to Bonnie’s: jealousy. Bonnie was jealous of her mum spending time with Lenn and not her, and Calan was jealous that if Lenn moved in with Yvaine, Lenn would get to have breakfast with Bonnie every morning and tuck her in every night. Cal should be doing that, not some strange bloke. Bonnie was feeling pushed out and usurped in her mother’s affections, and Cal could wholeheartedly understand because he feared the same thing, that Lenn would become the most important man in Bonnie’s life and not him.
Feeling disgruntled, Cal carried on with the journey that would end with his daughter being returned to her mother’s waiting arms – and those of Yvaine’s blasted boyfriend.
In her usual excited way, Bonnie was out of the car before Cal had
even opened the driver’s door and she flew into the house, yelling for
her mother. Cal lifted Bonnie’s case from the boot and followed behind
in a considerably more sedate manner.
He hesitated on the step, unsure whether to go on in or wait until he was invited.
To his annoyance, it was Lenn who did the inviting, acting as though it was his house, not Yvaine’s. He seemed very much at home, despite having a rather grand home of his own on the outskirts of Portree.
Cal tried not to scowl as he realised Yvaine and Lenn might be living together sooner than he’d hoped. The chap seemed to have moved in already.
‘Did Bonnie have a nice time?’ Lenn asked, taking the case from Cal’s reluctant fingers. It felt symbolic somehow, as though it wasn’t just the case he was handing over, it was Bonnie, too.
‘She did, thanks. And you?’
‘We had a lovely time. Sand, sea, se—’ Lenn stopped, but the proprietorial smarmy look in his eye left Cal in no doubt as to what the man had been about to say.
It was a blatant show of possessiveness, Lenn letting Cal know that he was the bloke sleeping with Yvaine now, not Cal. He didn’t care. Lenn was welcome to her. His only concern was Bonnie, and he hoped she didn’t pick up on any of it.
Yvaine appeared in the hall, Bonnie clamped onto her like a limpet. ‘Cal, thank you for taking such good care of her,’ his ex-wife said.
Cal bit back a snarky retort. Had she expected him to neglect their daughter? If she had been so concerned, maybe she shouldn’t have buggered off to Cyprus for two weeks.
He tried to keep his voice even as he replied, ‘I’m her father. It’s my job to take care of my daughter.’
It took a monumental effort on Cal’s part not to look at Lenn as he said it, his gaze remaining on Yvaine. She was looking good, he noticed, the golden tan suiting her. She appeared to be relaxed and happy, despite the flight landing late last night and the long drive from Glasgow airport. In fact, Yvaine was glowing, radiant even.
Lenn looked good too, and Cal’s dislike of the man couldn’t detract from the fact that the guy was a handsome chappie. At thirty-five, he was two years older than Cal, slim, dark-haired and sophisticated. The opposite of Cal, who had a bigger build (all muscle, so he claimed), light russet hair and could in no way be described as sophisticated. Lenn was at home in an office. Cal was more at home on a mountain.
He wondered, not for the first time, whether Yvaine had deliberately chosen a man who was as far from Cal as she could find.
‘Go say goodbye to your dad,’ Yvaine urged, and Bonnie, suddenly realising that her father was about to leave, launched herself at him.
Cal scooped her up, her skinny legs wrapping around his waist, her arms around his neck.
‘I don’t want you to go,’ she muttered into his shoulder.
‘I have to Bon-Bon, you know I do.’
‘It’s not fair!’
Cal couldn’t agree more. And when Yvaine followed him to the car and quietly told him the news that she and Lenn were moving in together so that the three of them could be a ‘proper family’, Cal thought that life was very unfair indeed.
‘You’re back!’ Mhairi exclaimed in delight. She made to rise,
age-spotted hands gripping the arm of her chair as she shuffled to the
edge of the seat.
‘Don’t bother getting up,’ Cal told her, crossing the room in five strides and bending down to kiss her powdered cheek. As usual she looked immaculate. With her neatly styled hair, rouge, lipstick, and elegant clothes, she reminded him of the late Queen Elizabeth.
Mhairi accepted the kiss, then gestured for him to take a seat. ‘How is Bonnie?’
‘She’s good, thanks.’
‘And you? How was your visit to your parents?’
‘It was lovely. They were thrilled to have us stay, but I think they’re secretly relieved to see the back of us. They forget how lively she can be.’
‘You look tired, too,’ Mhairi observed. ‘I hope you’re not thinking of doing any work today. You are still officially on holiday. Go home and have a nap. I’ll see you tomorrow for our usual Monday morning meeting.’
‘But—’
She held up a hand. ‘I refuse to discuss business today, and if I hear you’ve disobeyed me, you’ll get the sack.’
‘Surely not. A misdemeanour like that only warrants a written warning.’
‘Consider yourself warned.’ Her eyes twinkled and he grinned back.
Cal had fallen on his feet when he’d landed this job, and he was thankful for it every day. Mhairi was the best employer anyone could wish for, and in the five years since he’d started working for her, he’d come to consider her a friend.
His job as the castle’s estate manager suited him down to the ground. He was Mhairi’s second-in-command, answerable only to her, and he thrived on the responsibility. As well as managing the castle itself, he also managed the craft centre and the land. It was challenging and hard work, and he thoroughly enjoyed it. But what had appealed to him the most when he’d applied for the job was that the castle was only a short distance from the village of Duncoorie, where Yvaine had moved after the divorce, so she could be near her parents who lived in the village. If Cal wanted to see as much of his daughter as possible, he’d had no choice but to move from Inverness, where he’d been the assistant manager of a large estate a few miles away, and relocate to Skye.
At the time he hadn’t cared what job he did, as long as he was near Bonnie.
Being offered the position at Coorie Castle had been wonderful, and his gratitude knew no bounds.
Giving Mhairi another peck on the cheek, he took his leave.
As he drove the short distance down the lane towards his cottage, his thoughts returned to Yvaine’s news. He wondered when she was planning on telling Bonnie. He would like to be there when she did, but he guessed there was little point in suggesting it.
As he reached the turn-off to the old boathouse, he glanced automatically at the loch, but for once the sight of water didn’t calm him. However, he did notice a car parked at the top of the track leading to the boathouse and he hoped whoever was renting it was having a better time than he was.